get me out of this prison

Jim Moriarty 1, Eurus Holmes 0

So just watched the episode again. And it struck me just how broken Eurus is.

I mean she may be good at messing with people but she is a million percent less functional than Jim was even with his suicidal boredom. Jim built a criminal empire over decades, he created a new type of criminal career and was filthy rich and never got done for a single crime.

And Eurus? She eventually managed to get out of prison and to kill a couple of people, play a few games, be persuasive for a while, and then got all teary and got locked up again. And even that was only with his help once he’d ‘woken her up’.

How amused Jim would have been to see her break down at the end. I wonder if he saw that emotional time bomb in her when they met.

He used her to burn the heart out of Sherlock and when she was done and broken she ended up right back where she started.

Jim will always be king

anonymous asked:

I know the Baudelaires parents died but I did have hope that Mother and Father would be their parents instead of the Quagmires. But why were the Quagmires after the Baudelaires children? Why were the children going to Peru were the Quagmires were? I believed the Quagmires were first choice guardians of the Baudelaires. But, who sent that secret code to the Quagmires? Who saved Mr. Poe's job? Perhaps one of their parents made it out and sent the Quagmires to help. This is driving me nuts!!

Woah there, volunteer! There’s a lot to asnwer here:

Keep reading

What I Wish We’d Had in Dishonored 2

[be warned, this has spoilers for Dishonored and Dishonored 2.]

So. Dishonored 2 has been out for a while, but all that means is I’ve had some time to think about it. And what it lacks.

Don’t get me wrong, I love the game. The gameplay, the powers, and the level design are all huge improvements on what was already an excellent game. The worldbuilding was fantastic. But it lacked…emotion.

In Dishonored, there was a terrified desperation and a constant malaise of decay as you moved through the game. As your journey took you from the strictly orderly Coldridge Prison to the divided remnants of the Loyalists at Kingsparrow Island, you watch everything collapse–as Jessamine predicts with her final words, “It’s all coming apart.” As you play through–on high chaos or low–you experience that. You see the literal collapsing of Dunwall, as you crawl through its underbelly, as you cross the collapsing ruins of the Flooded District. You see the increasing brutality of the city watch, as Sokolov’s devices are turned on civilians and gang members alike, as the response to the plague becomes “burn them.” You see the very idea of loyalty fall apart, as the Loyalists betray you and Havelock set himself up as Burrows 2.0–but this time more desperate, more alone, less defended. High chaos or low, Havelock turns on Pendleton and Martin, and sits, cornered but unwilling to give up, waiting for Corvo to come “crossing the island as though it were nothing.” With each level, for each success, you, and Dunwall, have gotten a bit more fucked. Alongside Samuel and Emily’s responses to your choices, the plot and world make you feel the desperation regardless of what you do, as events outside your control bring Dunwall to the edge of desolation, and you’re the tipping point.

I don’t think Dishonored 2 had the potential for that desperation–not without completely redoing the plot–but I also don’t think it needed that. What it needed was a new emotional direction, one that Jessamine’s presence didn’t really provide.

The biggest weakness of Dishonored 2′s story is that it’s Dishonored’s, but without the desperation. You even go kidnap Sokolov again. In Mission 4, no less. And, eventually, after bringing down all his allies, you go to Dunwall Tower and take out the Lord Regent–I mean, you go to the Grand Palace and take out the Duke.

What Dishonored 2 has that Dishonored doesn’t is an Empress. It’s Emily’s story this time, not Corvo’s. And sometimes Emily being Empress–and a fairly neglectful Empress, at that–is relevant. For a line or two. 

So what I wish we’d had in Dishonored 2 is a storyline that deals with that, and there are two ways I’d have gone about that without making it a repeat of Dishonored:

1) Make Luca actually a good Duke. Make him actually care for his people, and helping Delilah seize power out of love for her and dislike of Emily’s (and Dunwall’s) indifference. Give me more reason to spare him. Make overthrowing him a morally dubious decision.

2) Keep Luca Abele as he is, but have him lose his city and his throne. Have someone else–Lucia Pastor, perhaps–overthrow him, then make a deal with Delilah to bring down Emily, since it was her indifference that let the Duke become what he became. 

Either way, making the leader of Serkonos, one of Delilah’s most powerful allies, a better leader than Emily herself has been gives a lot more opportunity to show her growth, rather than a couple scattered lines and the character telling us “oh yeah I’ve learned a lot about not being a bad ruler” at the beginning of the last mission. 

We were watching the PLAY


I just re-watched tfp to overanalyse the utter shit this episode was and found something that made me a little suspicious:

This shot is one of the cameras in Eurus cell. It is one of the recorded videos that show her manipulating the prison warden, and it reads 18992201.Of couse they could be random numbers, but I thought hey, why not strip them down. The first idea was a date, 22.01.1899, but I couldn´t really find anything.

But what if we seperate them? There have been numerous rumours that we might get a fourth episode next sunday and someone even found out that yahoo has a fourth episode listed.

The date for that episode is the 22.01.

Now we´ve still got 1899 left. A little google search on Arhtur Conan Doyle was done and I found THIS:


Now, lets see what we got this episode:

Honor Kneafsey

the girl who not only played the girl on the plane, but also one of the sisters at the beginning in A Scandal in Belgravia. (Plus: everyone on the plane in tfp was “asleep”, just like the dead people in asib)

A Study in Pink

basically the whole ending of this episode was asip flashbacks. We´ve got shock blankets, 221b, even the flippin text Sherlock send (You know where to find me. SH) is the exact same text he send to Lestrade in the beginning of asip. Everything is back to the beginning.

There is so much more to this, but I really want to believe I´m on the right track here. They promised us a rug pull, but they had to give us a rug first. This is it.

The reason TFP was so bad was because it wasn´t the original story. It´s a PLAY. In fact, this is THE PLAY where one of Conan Doyles famous quotes regarding his characters comes from:

Doyle later recounted how he had received a cable from Gillette inquiring, “May I marry Holmes?”, to which Conan Doyle replied, “You may marry him, murder him, or do anything you like to him.

THAT IS WHAT THEY DID. They redid 1899 and made us believe we we´re watching the original story. But it´s not, and we will have to wait to the 22.01 to find out what really happened.

(sorry if this was rambly. I am neither a good writer nor is my english good enough to put all my thoughts into words. but my key message is: if you are still willing to hope, please do!)

Voltron Theory: “Galra” is not a species

I’ve had this theory on the brain for AGES and I want to get it out before season 2 so HERE WE GO: 

Throughout season 1 of Voltron, we have been introduced to four definite species of aliens: Alteans, Arusians, Balmerans, and the Galra (I’m not counting the prisoners Shiro and Matt met because we only see one of each rather than a population, so there’s no way to compare).

Between these four species (we can also consider humans for this), I think it’s safe to say that the Galra are by far the most physically diverse:

The Galra differ in ways that no other species does. Although they share the same purple skin tones and yellow eyes, they actually show a surprising variety of physical features: some have fur, some don’t; some have different-shaped ears; some are more reptilian; some even have irises, while the majority don’t; most are very tall, but Haggar is actually shorter than Allura.

Another notable difference is that while all other alien species we’ve met have a home planet, the Galra have only a huge military base–there’s no planet. A Galra homeworld is never mentioned, and the term “Galra” itself can always be interpreted as referring to a military force or distinct government. We never meet a “Galra person”–only Galra soldiers and Galra ships. 

Another odd moment I noticed was in episode 106 during Haggar’s Komar(?) experiment.

Zarkon: “This [the Komar Experiment] will revolutionize the way we advance throughout the galaxy. Mining and colonizing planets is a thing of the past.”

Mining planets certainly makes sense–we see that with the Balmera. But colonizing seems like a weird term. Why would Zarkon want his own people to mingle with indigenous lifeforms on other planets? Why not just take the resources, enslave the people, and hop to the next? Why “colonize”? 

Also, there is this “refining” process to consider: 

We know that quintessence is incredibly powerful: “the substance with the highest known energy-per-unit volume in the universe.” We also know that it is perfectly suitable for powering spaceships, as we see with the Altean castle. So why would there be a refining process? What specific requirements would their ships need? And WHY would the refining process itself require magic of all things? 

Unless it isn’t meant solely for ships. 

I submit that “Galra” isn’t a species of aliens like we’re thinking. I think the Galra are actually genetically modified aliens from various backgrounds that have been conquered–or more specifically “colonized”–by Zarkon. 

I only feel like myself when I’m dancing around a penthouse apartment in a fur coat, drinking champagne from the bottle. He’s watching me, laughing, with his wallet out and his dick hard.

I’m painted like a sad sixties movie star. At 2am I lie in bed with my head on his chest. It’s black & white, but I know my tongue shines like rubies, wet & glossy. Is he watching me sleeping? I’m getting warmer but I don’t want him to see me soften just yet. 

When I try to go he stops me with his hands around my throat. If I say no then I’m a ghost & I’ve never been the kind of girl who fades out like a star. I’m neon signs & prison bars. Give love and then I take it. I’ve been taken from the most.

Sometimes I think I’m so pure that my blood runs clear like holy water & everyone who looks into my eyes will know that I don’t fall in love. I fall from heaven. He thinks I’m here to save him….

Face of an angel & the body of a porn star. The men play cards and split cash like God is watching but he keeps his eyes shut tight, like I do at night when they touch me like a rose, only petals, no thorns…

but where they see a halo, i see horns.

The Signs as Celldweller Lyrics

Aries:  “If time’s a song, I won’t wait for its reprise. I am done wishing farewells and goodbyes” - EON

Taurus:  “What the hell is wrong with me? Why am I torturing myself? Fixated on these memories. Like a prisoner inside a cell” - So Long Sentiment

Gemini: “I want to forget mistakes they’ve helped me make. It’s better to be broken than to break” - Frozen

Cancer: “I feel lost in time. But if I wait for direction my lifetime will pass me by.” - Lost In Time

Virgo: “Are you hoping for something? Waiting for some sign? It’s time to jump in or simply get the hell out. I think you better make up your mind” - The Best It’s Gonna Get

Leo: “You go on pretending that you own the universe and we’ll all be here watching as you’re falling down to earth” - Down To Earth

Scorpio: “I’ve pinned my heart to my sleeve so that the whole world can see I have a heart on for you” - Heart On

Sagittarius: “How could have I been so earthbound with my heart in the depths and my face in the ground? It’s time to uproot myself and move on.” - Birthright

Libra: “Lead in my gut, not in my spine. I feel distracted all the time” - So Long Sentiment

Capricorn: “Don’t back up, your ass is to the wall again and aren’t you sick of wasting so much time?” - Birthright

Aquarius: “I’ve already crossed my heart and hoped to die and it’s true, I am a fighter with a point to prove.” - Heart On

Pisces: “A problem I’m not solving, eternally revolving. I wandered from the pathway, praying you will come to save me.” - Lost In Time

So another thing about Shiro’s galra arm being the reason why Zarkon keeps finding them:

His arm has his prisoner number information somewhere in there is a tracker.

Can’t let the Champion get away that easy. Can you.

There it is.

I really haven’t seen anyone mentioned this maybe I haven’t looked hard enough.


On a side note: I did get his permission to put these pics up and to tell this story. If you have any other questions please message me and I’ll try to post what answers I can. 

This is my mate from London, met him while out on the club scene in 2014. He used to always be out taking drugs, partying and fucking so many guys. A real recognisable face everyone knew him and everyone fancied him. He used to get loads of attention, modelled quite a few club nights and even modelled fashion stuff as well.

Anyway in early 2015 he was prosecuted for some drug charge and sent to prison for 16 months. While in prison without his drug taking partying lifestyle he jus got massively overweight. His chiselled abs and rock hard pecs swelled and softened, and his belly just ballooned out in front of him as he wasn’t really able to be active he said that he just became really lazy, watched tv and ate snacks all day for the whole time. He was weighed when he went in, he was 5′10″ and 167 lbs and left 16 months later 236 lbs. Since he has been out he is still gaining more weight even though he has made poor attempts to get back into shape. 

Now back in London I made contact with him again. He wanted a hook up and when before I wasn’t his first pick, all his former gym bunny conquests aren’t interested in him now he has let himself go and let himself get so massively overweight. 

I see him occasionally, firstly I was shocked at how big he was and would tease him about his chubby fingers, his slight waddle and how his vest barely fits over his round belly now. Now he knows I’m into him being big and gaining more weight and even though he says he is ‘trying’ to lose weight, he lacks self control with me and I can always get him to pig out at a buffet or chug a few beers at a bar. Even had some feeding sessions while having sex where he has chugged pints of cream for me. Its weird how before I was too fat and not ripped enough for him and how I am in way better shape than him and I’m making him get fatter and fatter and becoming a big blubber boy. 

OPM High School Teacher AU

Mr. Saitama:

  • History teacher
  • “Just call me Saitama”
  • No one calls him Saitama
  • Barely ever gets out of his chair to teach
  • Has the highest test scores out of all the other teachers
  • Always gets his students to turn the lights off for him
  • Always buys his school supplies on sale
  • Doubles as the track and field coach
  • Denies ever buying the dancing flower that sits on the math teacher’s desk
  • but he totally did 
  • Best friends with the guidance counselor  

Mr. Genos:

  • Math teacher
  • Youngest member of the faculty 
  • The king of resting bitch face
  • There’s a rumor that he smiles but only around the history teacher
  • Goes from 0 to fuck you in 3.5
  • Somehow manages to both frighten the students and be their favorite
  • Teaching style is strict and intense but he never leaves anyone behind
  • Tied for 1st place as the most popular teacher
  • Bought the cactus that sits in one of the windows of the history teacher’s classroom
  • Adamantly hates and despises the physics teacher
  • Sponsors the robotics club

Mr. Mumen:

  • Guidance counselor 
  • Nicest man on the planet
  • Once baked cookies for all of the students
  • Rides his bike to work and always keeps it behind his desk
  • He’s the best at helping people with their problems
  • One student literally said they had come out of his office a changed man
  • Always smiling 
  • Keeps trying to help the physics teacher with his anger issues
  • Always ends up beat up whenever he tries to stop a fight


  • Principal 
  • Some people think he’s the oldest person in the building
  • Is literally the oldest person in the building
  • A walking fortune cookie
  • Keeps trying to get people to join his martial arts club 
  • Sometimes just stares at people 
  • One of the teachers bought him a #1 Boss mug and he always walks around with it

Ms. Fubuki:

  • Biology teacher
  • Her students act like her followers 
  • There’s a rumor going around that she’s a cult/gang leader
  • She may or may not be
  • People always pay attention in her class
  • Has the best boobs 
  • Once lectured a student in front of the whole class because they fell asleep at their desk
  • Has a rivalry with her sister that no one seems to understand
  • Always eats lunch with the math teacher, the history teacher, and the gym teacher 


  • Gym teacher
  • Everyone calls him King
  • Worst gym teacher in the history of man
  • 90% of the time he’s sitting around playing video games
  • Sometimes the history teacher sits with him
  • Usually tells his students to go run around somewhere so he can finish playing his games
  • No one complains in his class because they’re too scared of him 

Mr. Sonic

  • Physics teacher
  • Always angry 24/7
  • Expects his students to get everything he teaches instantly
  • Can zoom across his classroom in 2.5 seconds
  • Absolutely HATES the math and history teachers with an unhealthy passion
  • A student once told him a joke that had him do his weird laugh for a good ten minutes
  • The math teacher once threw a ball of paper at him while he was teaching 

Mr. Mask

  • Cosmetology teacher 
  • Savage King 9000 over here
  • Roasts your existence to dust
  • Has the worst personality out of all the members of the faculty
  • Tied for 1st place as most popular teacher
  • Has a cult following in the school that rivals the Biology teacher’s
  • Very strict when it comes to grading
  • Keeps insisting that blue is his natural hair color
  • People keep thinking he’s trying to get into the math teacher’s pants

Mr. Puri Puri

  • Home Economics teacher 
  • Yes that’s his legal name
  • Is only allowed to teach all female classes because of…incidents
  • Is the only member of the faculty that has gone to jail
  • “I can bench press 20 men”
  • Makes a mean apple pie
  • Is probably the second nicest teacher in the school
  • Stalks the math teacher when he’s not teaching
  • Always wears the sweater his boyfriend made him

Ms. Tatsumaki

  • Assistant principal
  • Always mistaken as a child
  • No one can ever find her because she looks like she goes here
  • Always in a perpetual state of fuck you
  • Very strict about the dress code despite the fact that she always wears skimpy clothes to work
  • Almost hit the history teacher for calling her a two year old
  • Is incredibly strong for such a tiny person
  • Once caught the history and math teachers making out behind the school and yelled at them for an hour
The Kiss of Death?

Context: First session of a new game, but most of the players are also in another game, so we all know each other pretty well. We were all in an airship brig being transported to the harsh prison region.

Our Bard(Yaz) managed to get out of her cell after making the guard break down about the state of his life and giving him a kiss, only to see his throat open up(a mysterious detail we collectively forgot 30 seconds later)

After getting the cell key from the dead guard, I, a muzzled silver Dragonborn, got her to let me out out as well…

Yaz, after trying and failing to get my muzzle off: We’ll figure out how to get that off, don’t worry. (Rolls a 23 Athletics to give my Dragonborn a kiss on the forehead)

A few moments later…

Yaz: Y'know, everyone who’s died so far, I’ve kissed!

Me, ooc: I’d like to start wiping my forehead clean now…

To Celebrate 200 Followers!!
  1. ”Who’s it’s possible that both of us took out the trash
  2. God, that woman pisses me off to no end!…but that’s why I want her 
  3. “I’m on middle of the fucking fight! Stop it!
  4. I’m gonna throw up, I hope that’s cool 
  5. Come on woman! 
  6. I broke two lower ribs, my stomach is full plum color.. Sleeping is kinda hard
  7. “Jump!”
    “Aim for the tree!”
  8. “Do you think this is a good idea?”
    “My honest opinion is that this is the worst idea I’ve gotten since going to college, but..”
  9. You broke me out of the prison for this? As grateful as I am for getting me down from that wall, I don’t think you want me messing with that
  10. The kid was around adults all day, he knew how to approach them easily. 
  11. Toni was uncomfortably leaning backwards  on her hands as Scott stitched the wound inches below where the sport bra ended.
  12.  I have a breathing fucking creature inside my stomach, if you want to talk to me, you better fucking speak nice to me.    
  13. “Did you eat my lasagne last night?”
    “I haven’t even seen you in weeks.”
    “That doesn’t mean you haven’t broken into my flat. Remember, I know you.”
  14.   did he just..? Tell me he didn’t just put foot through my door
  15.  “What’s happening with Tom?”
    “Oh it’s full war with him.”
  16. ”Are the knots too tight?”
    “I don’t care.”
    “Well they’re on you..”
  17. She got her ribs kicked in for this?!
  18. “You sure that this is good idea?”
    “This is an great idea, what are you even talking about?”
  19.  “Can I get you something stronger?”
    “What would you suggest, barkeep?”
    “Rum and coke, without rum of course.”
  20. She’s the type of person who will pull the trigger for you when you’re too weak to do this yourself
  21.  You couldn’t have choice the worst time to do that
  22.  She could barely move her toes without grimacing in pain.
  23. With a broken nose and a stitches on her cheek, she showed up at senior’s prom and started a fight
  24. “Who are you?”
    “I’m someone who the people you own money are afraid of.”
  25. “Was that a gunshot?”
    “Gunshots don’t echo, fireworks do.”
    “Was that yes or no to the gun”
  26. I think she grew up with at least one broken rib at any given time
  27. That’s a brave fucking kid
  28.  I stared down at my hands, as people walked past the stairs, laughing and talking to each others. I was starting to feel the pain on my knuckles.
  29. Charlotte lifted her hoodie over her head covering herself from the world and stuffed her hands into the front pockets of hers jeans hunching hers shoulders closer to hers body as if trying to be unnoticeable.
  30. The itching rope was rubbing against my wrists as I tried to yank the rope off, they had bound my legs from ankles and up my knees. Something was tied around my neck, it restrained me from moving, which was obviously doing it’s job right. 
  31. To family. What wouldn’t she do? She took the punches for her siblings, from fists of her father and words of so many who ever were relevant.
  32. “Don’t run!
    “But he’s staring right at me”
  33. You have to admit, she’s great at what she does.
  34. If they trap us, we have good 50 minutes before we could get help. So don’t mess up.
  35. She was the first one to reach there and she took the worst of it
  36. He tightened his grip on my arm again and dug his nails into my skin.
  37. Three of them all squished into the back seat of the car. 
  38. Tyler had my teel backpack on his shoulder, his big form looking ridiculous with such a color
  39. “You thought he was crazy and you decided to just sat down next to him?”
    “He’s an nice guy”
  40. “You can’t deny that this isn’t relaxing.”
    “We are in prison. Nothing relaxing about this”
  41. “We don’t speak about the accident, Dara!”
    “No, no, we do not talk about it! Only mention it several times and wait someone to snap at us!”
    “They will beat us down and yell until we tell them the secret behind the accident.”
  42. Joisie knew that smirk on Rosa’s face. It wasn’t even a smirk, it was just disturbing lift of her red painted lips as she marched through the dance floor.
  43. “What are you doing?“
    “Depends are you going to judge me  or not?“
    “It really depends if you’re cleaning blood off your shirt?”
  44. Her head hurt. Almost enough for her to put a bullet in her own head
  45. “Pretended to be my sister!”
    “Seriously, again? Who lies about having a sister to get a girl?”
  46. “This is going to hurt.“
    “To be honest, you’d done much”
  47. “If I one more time wake up with duct tape over my mouth, I will throw you out of the fucking balcony.”
    “It’s not my fault that you snore!” 
  48. “You could’ve called, Kurt.”
    “Is he home?”
    “Passed out cold mid-way up the stairs. 
  49. She can pass the polygraph easily, you know that.
  50. Following people isn’t nice, you know. 
  51. Someone came to clean up the place?
  52. “Can you contact him?”
    “It isn’t so easy..”
    “Can you or can you not?”
  53. “You look bit homeless there”
    “I am bit homeless, though” 
  54. My clothes weight so much because of this damn mud. 
  55. I can’t hold you, you fat bastard. Use your feet to climb
  56. Only you would ask somebody who you met for the first time to break you out of a damn prison
  57. She will kill you if that’s the only way to get him back
  58. You know what they called me. You know my reputation 
  59. “You didn’t actually kill him, did you?”
    “Well now, you really have to define killing and accidentally letting him die”
  60. Not answering the phone is not a new thing for her
  61. Should I apologize and kick you or not apologize and kick you.
  62. And once again we are on the starting point. Crying on the playground.
  63. I’m working on my anger issues and seeing you angers me the most, so stay the hell away
  64. I’m not saying we should worry, but we have no breaks and the bridge is ending.
  65. We have a lead. Well, it’s more of a stupid ass guess, but it’s somethin’
  66. “Where did you bury her?”
    “Lake Baika”
  67. “We have possible sighting of her in Waterfront Park, Seattle”
    “How sure?“
    “It’s her. It’s definitely her.”
  68. “Your name is James? But you’re a girl“
    “My father was in drugs when he decided it“
  69. Explain the blood
  70. I pulled the trigger, hoping that the bullet magically would turn around and kill me instead
  71. “I’m a graphic designer, not a firefighter!”
    “Nobody told you how to throw water to a fire?”
  72. who did you manage to fell asleep in the bathtub?
  73. You really have high tolerance of pain, don’t ya?
  74. “Does your shoulder hurt?”
    “I have a butcher knife sticking out of me! What the fuck do you think?!”
  75. It’s amazes me how you are willingly to put your body through everything only to hurt her
  76. “Will you dig me out if this collapses in?
  77. She slowly brought the spoon to her mouth, closing her eyes as the warm liquid touched her lips. It was like she was afraid to eat. 
  78. There was no sympathy in her words
  79. Her past flickered in her eyes, the torture and pain coming back in waves.  
  80. Have you eaten breakfast yet?
  81. If she hits someone again, she will get kicked out
  82. She might be in prison by then
  83. She threw her bag and the cigarettes on the backseat
  84. She laid on her bed, pouring last of the mashed up chips down her throat. Relaxing her arms and letting them slam down against the mattress. 
  85. She didn’t fight back, not against him.“
  86. Tell me that this is never going change”
    “But the truth is, this is going to change.
  87. I jumped to the couch, placing my leg on his lap. “Touch me.” I dramatically whispered, “I just shaved.” Isaiah laughed, pushing my legs away. 
  88. Ohhh, that ain’t good
  89. I don’t aim on being the sweetheart one
  90. I kept the helm of the dress up, as I ran towards Leo, grabbing him into one arm hug
  91. After I had kicked the ball to Gordon, a third leg intervened, tackling me to the ground. 
  92. His leg managed to connect left side of my face
  93. On second period, I dragged myself in my car and passed out in the backseat
  94. She and Diego did every single thing that a parents would do for their kids
  95. You still don’t seem to understand. She doesn’t care if she dies, and that’s a biggest problem for us
  96. I am parked outside your house, so get your ass out here or we’re gonna leave
  97. Okay, I just want to put you on mute right now
  98. My girl, you are crazy as hell
  99. Bennett leaned against the wall, staring down at my shoes as I nervously tapped it against the ground
  100. You do whatever you hate to do to save her
  101. “Don’t be an asshole this time, okay?”
    “If you mean the blood mojito thing, it wasn’t my fault –“
    “It was definitely your fault, so shut up.”
  102. She had her head over the sink, both doctors stapling her busted up head
  103. “Put a towel under your head so the sheets won’t be bloody.”
  104. The bandages around my torso constricted painfully as I drew in a deep breath, hoping the stitches wouldn’t tear. 
  105. It’s special if he choice you from 23 girls.”
    “Yes, or he might be a serial killer or creepy otherwise.”
    “Or like last time, it might be grandpa of one of our girls and you have to bring your medical past back up.”
  106. Okay, that was an aggressive door slam.
  107. ”Just a heads up, Eric’s looking for you”
    Of course he is.”
  108.  One week here, and she stabbed three of our staff members, landed seven patient into medical care.  
  109. She’s the best damn sniper in this base
  110. I mean let’s be honest. This isn’t exactly working. 
  111. You still believe in happy endings? 
  112. Both of them could see the silvery white scar, about a half an inch wide, midway down her rib cage. 
  113. Ronnie was regretting her idea of putting high heeled ankle boots as she struggled to keep up with Nikki, who was walking ahead, kicking the snow and sleet
  114. Half-finished cigarette stumps were scattered on the last step
  115. My job is to run in front of everyone and not to get killed. Simple
  116. I jumped around to keep the balance as I ripped my shoe off, chunking it away to corner.
  117. “Anslo is going to kill you”
    “Quite many people are going to kill me”
  118. “I don’t think you understand.. I’m not an angel. I kill people, I murder people.. it’s my work, my job is to kill.”
  119. “If you ever again hurt her, look at her bad way.. I will kick in your miserable little balls. I will show you how it feels like to be beaten by somebody how once said ‘I love you’ to you. I can make it to hurt..”
  120. ”You should get somebody who actually wants to help you”
    “I will buy you double”
  121. “Could you explain why you are even with him?”
    “Somebody’s gotta do it. I’m taking a bullet for everybody else”
  122. “How can you even sleep next to him?”
    “Well, the snarleks is paying off with other things”
    “I don’t wanna even know.”
  123. Hey Mikey! Your father wants you to phone!
  124. You want to play her game? Don’t. You don’t want to get into it, believe me.
  125. Drown on a fish pool asshole
  126. Apparently I’m only good at taking beatings
  127. “I trust her”
    “It doesn’t matter. She doesn’t trust herself.”
  128. Someone just proposed in our dorm. Anybody know who’s Marley
  129. The dwarf looked her with disgust
  130. “Do you think she will stay?”
    “Knowing her.. I think she will 
  131. “You were supposed to bring the ladder”
    “I did. The bike is the ladder.”
    “No! Bike is not a ladder.”
    “I hold it, you climb up the wall of amazement.” 
  132. She wouldn’t last much longer, both of them knew it. Her knees were going to give up soon
  133. She leaned her forehead against the wall, letting the cold water run down her back.  
  134. “The safe house in Casablanca has been compromised”
  135. He ran up the stairs of Pinehurst Avenue 
  136. On the back roads of Nebraska, custom made Harley left a dusty cloud behind as it roared down the gravel route. 
  137. “I got inspired by genius but insane dictator Adolf Hitler, and got six.”
    “I can’t possibly imagine what word you got.”
  138. Lee can’t stop laughing, so I already have thoughts about this.
  139. “Question is, would I lie to you?”
    “She totally would.”
  140. I once had to dive out of my girlfriend’s window because his father tried to chop me in half with an axe
  141. Whatever she says, you do and you follow her 
  142. Don’t get into a fucking knife fight
  143. “Do you want me to do it?”
    “Are you sure? Hundred present sure? I have great change of breaking his neck”
  144. I just need to you are  alright, call me back.
  145. I may be getting way too old for this
  146. “I have to… go.. Need to shower my.. cat”
    “She doesn’t want to talk you assbag, go along”
  147. “Shut up, you don’t have option in this. Take the fucking leather tie off and don’t do anything stupid.”
  148. “Yeah, give her a reason to trust you even less!”
    “It’s not my fault that she can’t trust anybody!”
    “No, it’s exactly people like you why she can’t do that anymore.”
  149. You can’t just keep hitting everything you see 
  150. “You look like..”
    “Mess? I’m aware”
  151. You just fucked up our dinner!
  152. “What are you –?”
    “My father was one of the nutcases that were obsessed with zombie outbreak. Turns out that fucker was right.”
  153. Let the man in before he breaks my doorbell
  154. “I’m going to stay out of it this time. My old man is going to send me in Chicago if I get expelled one more time.”
    “What’s in Chicago?”
    “Not him.”
  155. I hold my books up against his chest, to keep his face coming even inch closer. 
  156. “Don’t be childish!”
    “What does that even mean?”
  157. If you haven’t noticed, huge part of my leg is in the desert in Afghanistan
  158. Charles had never understood her, but he had accepted that he couldn’t  
  159. John poured half bottle of vodka on me
  160. “He’s passed out in very weird position in the bathroom.”
  161. Stop slapping me with rings on! It h.u.r.t.s!
  162. Stop asking me to be your girlfriend! 
  163. Help me get off these stupid boyshorts.
  164. I can’t feel my thighs 
  165. Do you know how much replacing doors cost? Windows are also so fucking expensive.
  166. just remember personal space with her and you will be alright
  167. “You are so needy right now”
    “I’m aware”
  168. the game of ‘don’t touch the jellyfish’ is more painful than I thought
  169. there’s no people in 10 miles and I managed to run into a maniac
  170. “Do I have to?”
    “Sooner or later.”
    “Well I’m sure she’s willing to tell everything to you.”
  171. Do you think I can swallow the charge cord?
  172. “Do we have a ladder?”
    “If you’re trying to take the perfect photo of Empire State Building in our roof. No, we do not own a ladder.”
    “I just want to take the poster down from the ceiling.”
  173. “Are you and - ?”
    “Jackson. We are roommates.”
  174. “It’s landlord!”
    “Okay, we practiced this! Go, go!”
  175. yeah, you tried to drink beer out of you eye, it was quite amusing to look actually 
  176. Who did you run into a gun wielding gang within a two minutes entering here?
  177. “That’s not smart!”
    “I’m not trying to be smart!”
  178. “He has slight problems”
    “I mean, we can discuss this whole night but”
  179. “When’s the last time you ate? And I mean real food.”
    “I had those ribs two days ago at your house”
  180. She has friends in high places, that’s why she has the job
  181. “How’s she alive?”
    “I’ve been asking that since she was born”
  182. “Does she have TV in there?”
    “Had. But her idea of shutting it off was to shoot it, so”
  183. “Go low!”
    “Low? What do you mean low? Stop confusing me!”
  184. You wrapped pizza box.. most amazing birthday present ever 
  185. “You mind if I crash here?”
  186. He uses fancy words that I don’t understand
  187. “Is your hair still green?”
    “I don’t think my mother really wants to me to ruin my hair again”
  188. Just pull your hood up. 
  189. You are same age now that your mother got you, she may not be worried but I am! 
  190. Your father looks like bodybuilding Santa. It’s quite attractive 
  191. “I know nobody here. What I’m going to do?”
    “Blend in.”
  192. Can you stop hanging out alone in the bathrooms when we are in parties? 
  193. What we discussed about the B-word?
  194. “So he can call you bitch but I can’t?”
    “You already call me slut. Easy with the insults okay?”
  195. “Why do you have a shirt with my face in it?”
    “You’re my best friend”
  196. “What’s wrong with you?”
    “I have kind of fucked up nerve ends”
  197. I got no fucking gun!
  198. What does under control mean to you? Because you have bazooka in your hands and I don’t think it’s safety to blast it inside the house  
  199. “You’re dating a firefighter?”
    “Well dating is a strong term to use”
  200. It’s like you don’t even know how much I love you
Butcher!Neil - PART IV

>>Read from Part I

When Neil Josten goes to prison, he makes a five year plan.

It’s not the same kind of five-year plan most sixteen year olds have, and he doesn’t expect to live for all of it, but if all goes well, neither will his father.

When he meets Andrew Minyard, he makes a tweak in his plan.

See, Andrew gets sent to solitary confinement when he murders another inmate. But there’s a man here who knows one of the prison officers who knows other prison officers and Neil was planning to bribe them with the location of one of Mary’s stashes of money anyway, to have someone who can keep him updated on his father, but it’s no effort to have Andrew Minyard come straight back out of solitary.

“Don’t do me favours,” he tells Neil, his orange sleeves pulled right down over his arms. He must have left his black armbands and its knives somewhere else.

Neil turns, and falls into step with him. “Just returning the one you did me.”

“I told you. He was a lousy cellmate.”

“I want something from you. Something else,” says Neil, and Andrew tilts his head. He’s listening. Prison is an endless churn of favours owed and favours due. “Get me a set of knives like yours.”

Andrew smiles mirthlessly. “And what will you give me for that?”

“Name your price,” says Neil. Andrew raises an eyebrow, as if to ask if Neil is really that stupid. “I might not agree to it. But it depends on what you want.”

“Nothing,” says Andrew. They reach his cell, but given the door’s made of bars, it makes little effect when he closes it in Neil’s face. “I want nothing.”

If Neil has learnt anything from his father, it’s that this is never true. Everyone wants something, even if it’s as simple as peace. “How long is your sentence?”

Andrew frowns at him, the first real hint of emotion Neil’s seen. “Ten.” A pause, then a faint warning note: “I don’t like being toyed with.”

That’s something that Neil’s already aware of, so he cuts straight through to his plan, pitching his voice low so no one else can hear. Even with early release for good behaviour, that ten years is going to be eight, at least “I’m going to be out in under three. I’ll take you with me.”

This time, Andrew laughs. It echoes through the cell, drawing several panicked looks from their neighbours.

“Glad to be of entertainment,” mutters Neil, but Andrew is still facing him, so he supposes he caught his attention.

“A jailbreak,” says Andrew in a tone that implies he doesn’t believe Neil at all. “How exciting.”

Neil leans against the wall. Andrew has to look up at him from where he sits on the thin mattress, but physical intimidation and height is not something that works on a man who has spent his life looking up at everyone. “Not quite. I’ll be trading information for my time.”

Andrew’s lip curls. “Mob business.”

“Not for much longer,” says Neil.

“You’re boring me,” says Andrew dismissively. “Go away.”

Neil does. He hadn’t expected Andrew to say yes, but when he goes to bed that night, he finds a pair of black armbands tucked into his pillowcase.  

There’s only one knife in each, but, well, Neil’s only got two hands.

“You belong to me...”

Warning: Smut. 

Originally posted by reedustine

It’s been a few months since Woodbury fell and Rick brought those willing to accept out ways to the prison. You were in charge of people inquires and relations, a dumb job you thought, but it gave you something to do every day. Help those who came here and help them get back into the everyday motions. You were standing outside watching a group kill the walkers that were building up against the fence, when you felt the presence of another person standing next to you. You turned and seen it was Evan a young guy, about your age, that a crush on you. You felt bad for him because you and Daryl had been together since before the farm fell before your time at the prison. “Hot day out huh?” He asked wiping sweat off his brow, he looked at you and ran his thumb across your brow, a shiver went down your spine. You nodded and stepped away from him, “It’s always hot in Georgia,” you chuckled.

“Probably because it’s full of women as pretty as you,” you blushed at his kind words, and giggled like a school girl “Thank you Evan.” He ran his fingers up your arm, and laid his hand of your shoulder, a gentle gesture that if it was Daryl it would drive you absolutely crazy. “No need to thank me, thank yor parents for making such a beautiful daughter,” your blush grew deeper across your cheeks and he beamed at you. Little did you know Daryl was standing with ear shot, he growled. Stomping off in the other direction, you turned and seen Daryl stomping off away from you, and you shrugged it off. You laughed again laid your hand on his chest, pushing him back as he got closer to you, “You’re too kind Evan, but I have to go find Glenn, he was supposed to relieve me of watch 20 minutes ago, and I’m hot from the sun,” you chuckled at him, he wiggled his eye brows at you “Nah it’s just you not the sun.” You walked away and headed toward your and Daryl’s shared cell.

As you got in the cell you were slammed up again the cold stone wall, and before you could scream a calloused hand covered your mouth. “You belong to me” you were startled by this sudden outburst, but then it dawned on. He was jealous of Evan, you smirked against his hand. He removed his hand, “I didn’t know I belonged to anyone,” you said in defiance. Daryl pressed your back against the wall, “You belong to me!” he said in a stern voice, you were soaked at his dominance. You shivered as his slide his fingers up your arm and latched his lips to your neck. “Your arms, your neck, you cheeks…” he kissed your cheeks “mine.” Your body quivered against him, “your lips,” he kissed you roughly, “mine.” He kissed you more and pulled away, leaving you to feel empty, and full of desire, a look that reflected in his eyes. “Strip” you didn’t need to be told twice, and in an instance you were naked in front of him. His cock hardening at the sight of your bare breasts and the slick glimmer on your legs. He had you soaked and dripping. Just with his words, his actions nearly sent you over the edge. He pushed you against the wall again, cupping your cunt in his large hand sliding his fingers between your folds, roughly circling your clit. You squirmed against him, it felt so good. His other hand made its way to your hair and he pulled back, tilting your head back, exposing your neck to him, he kissed it, sucking greedily at the flesh, leaving little marks. “Now everyone will know you’re taken,” he whispered harshly into your ear. “Now hold still,” you stood stock still, as he forced his fingers into your hungry snatch. “You’re eager today kitten,” he purred, roughly going in and out of your cunt, your legs were shaking and you were close to much needed release when his ripped his fingers from you. You whimpered at the loose of fullness. He grabbed your hair and pulled you forward, forcing you again, “You’re gonna learn who you belong to!” he ordered pulling his pants down, his cock bouncing forward in front of you face, you licked your lips. And took the tip into your mouth, Daryl groaned as you slid your tongue around the head expertly, his knees buckled when you took more of his length into your mouth and sat down on to the bed, you took as much of his cock into your mouth as you could. He shuttered, as he was close to cumming, you pulled off of him with a coy smile on your lips, you stood and sat down on his lap, rubbing your slick folds against his wet cock. It twitched against you, and Daryl latched onto your nipple as you guided his cock into your waiting snatch. He filled you completely, you bit into his shoulder as he thrusted into you. The feeling magical. You wanted to scream you bit down hard, and Daryl groaned, laying down on the bed, letting you ride him, you swirled your hips and his bucked matching your pace, you both were panting loudly. “Scream my name kitten, let them know who gets to please you!” Daryl demanded. You let out a loud scream as you came. You rode out your orgasm, Daryl bucked roughly and soon came after you. You sighed, laying down on his chest, him still inside you. You’re breathing sporadically, Daryl breathing heavily under you.

“I love you,” he breathed, if this is what jealous Daryl was like, you needed to get him jealous more often, you smiled and kissed him lightly, “I love you too Daryl,” you cuddled into him.

Jokers Daughter Imagine: To The Rescue

Request: Can you do one where the daughter gets hurt and the joker comes to her rescue please?


thank you for the request! :)


“What are you going to do to stop me huh?!” you screamed at your as you put the finishing touches on your makeup. The two of you had been yelling at each other for almost an hour. He kept you locked up in the house like a prisoner, you wanted to go out with your friends and live a little.

The Joker threw his head back and cackled, he was impressed with your sass and spirit but wasn’t going to give up easy. You stood up and marched towards your bedroom door to leave and he leaped in front of it to block you. 

“Thiis whole rebellion thing is cute but you’re not going anywhere.” He crossed his arms with a grin still on his face “Gotham City at night is no place for my princess.” 

You could feel the tears starting up, you loved how he was protective but hated how to would turn to possessiveness. You held back your tears and turned to anger. You looked up at him with such rage in your eyes it made the grin fall off his face and he stood there jaw dropped. 

“Well I’m leaving, I’m going to have some freedom and if you don’t like it you’re just going to have to hit me like you did to mom!” You spat at his feeling your cheeks heat up from the anger. Your heart started pounding rapidly not believing the words left your mouth.

The clown prince dropped his arms to his side, he was dumbfounded. He didn’t know how to process his feelings. He had no idea you even saw that incident. You were just a toddler, he was drunk, him and Harley had been fighting about the squad and he lost control. He spent every day since it happened trying to make it up to his queen. Promising himself he would rather slit his own throat than do that again. He stared at his daughter, it felt like his heart had sank into his stomach, he never wanted you to think he was anything but the man of your dreams. Does she really think I’d ever hurt her? I’d tear apart anyone who did. He started breathing heavily and creeping out of your way not taking his eyes off of you.

He wanted to take you in his arms and hug you and never let you go. He wanted to keep you away from all the filth in the world but he felt like he couldn’t even breath right let alone move anymore. You looked up at him and immediately felt a wave of guilt. You knew how badly the incident scared both your parents, how your father hated and tore himself apart over it but you used it anyway. You used it to get what you wanted and you felt terrible. Not knowing what to do with your feeling either you just left. You wanted to leap into his arms but you just left. He’ll never forgive you for that. How could you say that to him. You thought to yourself as you walked out the front door and stepped into the purple lamborghini. The Joker didn’t even notice you driving away in his prized car. You felt numb as you drove to meet your friends.

You pulled up to the the spot at the park where you friends were sitting, you rolled down the window and called for them to get in.

“No fuckin way!” one of them screamed “(Y/N) you got the lambo?” 

“How the hell did you talk the joker into that?” the other asked

“Long story, just pile in as best you can I need a joy ride desperately.” The three of you situated yourself and you pressed on the gas. One friend turned up the radio as loud as it went and you all sang not caring how fast you were going. You rolled down the windows to feel the wind in your hair, wanting to forget everything. You raced around the city unafraid. You felt confident there would be no trouble, everyone probably assumed you were your father driving. The whole world knew when the purple lambo was out there could only be one driver and not to mess with that driver. Every person except one. The three of you quickly silenced when you felt the pounding on the top of the car.

The Joker paced around the house growling and shooting holes into the walls. How could she think that? How how how how how The voices in his head were getting louder and louder. She knows I love her that I never would harm a single gorgeous lock on her head. She knows doesnt she? She has to. He was getting more frantic. How could I let her go? How can she know I wouldn’t hurt her if I let her go out in this city. stupid stupid clown freezing up and letting her walk out. Letting her beat you down like that. The Joker searched his pockets for his keys, they were gone. He looked out the window and saw the driveway empty. He growled even louder.

“Frost!” he screamed and it echoed through the house. “Get me a car, we have to leave now!” He walked to the back door and by the time he was outside Frost had pulled with the car they used to do their heists

“We going to the bank boss?” Frost asked pulling away from the house.

“No… we’re going after the lambo.” He pulled out his phone and pressed on the tracker, he couldn’t be too careful with his favorite toy, and showed it to Frost who shook his head and sped up.

You tried to keep control of the car, you saw the black cape fly past the window every time you turned. 

This was the last thing you expected tonight. You tried to stick your head out the window to show him you weren’t the Joker. Your friends were holding onto the dashboard for dear life screaming as the bat tried to cut through the top of the roof. 

“Hey batboy!” you screamed trying to get his attention. “Hey!” you kept one hand on the steering wheel and stuck the other one out tapping the top of the lambo with your ring to get him to look at you. “Batsy it aint the Joker!” He stopped working on the hood and glanced down at you. You could see the shock in his face. “That’s right you rat with wings I just borrowed this! What ya gonna take us in for speeding?” you laughed at the bat causing him to lock up. He recognized the laugh, it was just like your fathers.

You and the bat both snapped out of your thoughts when you heard the screeching behind you. Frost was right on your tail and you saw your father stick a gun out the window and fire at the bat. He ducked down punched a hole into the roof on the spot he was working away at. He grabbed your friends by their shoulders pulling them out one through the top and one through the passenger window. They screamed and kicked trying to get out of his grasp but he was too strong. You tried to reach up and grab their feet but the bat shot away up into the air. By the time you gained control of the wheel again you crashed through the railings. You went sailing into the harbor. 

The Joker screamed at Frost to slam on the brakes. He jumped out of the car still firing at the bat before he disappeared into the night. He ran to the edge and screamed your name but all he saw was the tail lights disappear under water. The voices in his head started to scream and it felt like daggers through his skull. He couldn’t lose you, As he took his jacket off he had flash images of you in his head. Rocking you to sleep, stroking your hair, kissing your forehead. Then a flash of him slapping Harley and what your face must have looked like. What you must have felt. He wasn’t going to disappoint you again. 

He felt the cold water wash over his pale skin and it knocked him out of his mind and he was focused solely on swimming after you. He reached the car and saw you passed out over the wheel. He had a brief thought about how much he would make the bat pay for this. He grabbed you by the arms and pulled you out into his chest in one swift movement. He wrapped his arm around you and used the other to reach for the surface. When the air touched his face he took a deep breath and swam to the bed of rocks underneath the bridge and laid you on your back. He check your pulse and you weren’t breathing. He looked up to wear the car had smashed through the railing and yelled for Frost in a desperate voice neither one of them had heard before. He performed CPR on you and in between breaths he laid his head on your chest hoping to hear a heartbeat. He couldn’t tell if it was water or tears running down his face but he wiped them away nonetheless so he could see your face. You looked just like your mother. I don’t deserve either of them he thought, how could something so innocent and beautiful love me?

He closed his eyes and pulled your head onto his lap convinced it was over. he wrapped his arms under your legs pulling you closer to him in the fetal position. He howled like a wild animal as Frost ran to the both of you. He looked down at his feet sad and terrified, what the hell is going to happen now.

You slowly opened your eyes to see purple. You reached for it and tugged. It was your fathers shirt. You saw his head shoot up and he looked at you wide eyed. You coughed up water and pushed yourself out of his tight grasp to get some air and breathed heavily. Frost let out a sigh and loosened his tie in the background, relieved he was going to keep his life. You reached for your fathers hand and he grabbed it gently.

“Daddy…” you coughed struggling to breath “Im sorry im so sorry what I did… and the car” you coughed harder and he crawled over to you to rub your back. He grinned at you for keeping humor in the situation.

“Shhhh shh please princess” he intertwined his fingers with your and lifted up your hand to kiss it. “Never say sorry to me again you can do no wrong. I will spend eternity making everything up to you.” You looked up at him and saw the sincerity in his eyes. It took you by surprise for a moment, for the Joker to show something like this it must not have been easy. 

“And making everything up to mom” you smiled gently at him

“And mom” he shook his head understanding he had work to do.

You crawled into him and rested your head on his chest. “I love you no matter what ya know.” He didn’t say anything else, just hugged you tighter and kissed the top of your head. Shes mine again. Im never letting my princess go.

psa for college freshman

hey, whats up, hello! so you’re gonna be a freshman and you’re probably moving in real soon, and you might be excited but also nervous, not to worry i got you! here are some tips and tricks and general advice based on my own experience. 

okay so step by step:


okay so this is easily the most stressful thing about the first week of school. you gotta get all of your stuff into a tiny dorm if it’s a big room i am literally so jealous my dorm was like a prison so don’t freak out, stay cool and pack efficiently!

  • try not to overpack, it’s really easy to believe you’ll need everything you’re bringing but trust me you won’t even look at half of it
    • a good tip for this is, if you don’t use it at home, don’t bring it to school! (plus it’s really easy to just buy stuff you need on amazon so don’t forget that that’s an option too)
  • if you’re going to a school that deals in snow, DON’T bring that stuff (jackets/hats/boots/etc) with you when you move in. if you know you’re going to go home for a weekend before the snow sets in, definitely leave it at home and bring it with you later!
  • let your parents/guardians/friends/family help you move in. it might not seem like a big deal, but letting them help you will make them feel better. and if you don’t like how they arrange things, let it be! you have all semester to rearrange and settle in, they only have this one day, so just let them have it! also don’t forget to thank them when they leave!


ah yes, the wonderful concepts of roommates. i was lucky my freshman year, but some people aren’t

  • try and connect with them via facebook/school emails/phone, settling things like are you gonna share a mini fridge, microwave, coffeemaker and how you’re gonna decorate (if you’re into that) will help when you finally settle into your room
  • definitely go over ground rules once you’re all unpacked and settled in. my dorm had us go over a list of questions, come to an agreement, and sign it in case there were any future conflicts. cover things like: 
    • is it okay to have my friends sit at your desk or on your bed when you aren’t there?
    • how should we handle overnight guests?
    • do you want me to give you a heads up if i have friends coming over?
    • 100% agree to give each other a heads up on parents coming to your room
    • sharing food?
    • cleaning responsibilities
    • definitely definitely give each other a copy of your class schedule, and if you have classes at the same time maybe you can agree to make sure you’re both awake at the right time!
  • you don’t have to be bff’s with your roommate, sometimes it turns out that way and sometimes it doesn’t. what you do need to be is open and honest with your roommate. your year will be miserable (especially if you can’t switch roommates) if you don’t communicate with each other. don’t be afraid to tell them if something is bothering you. if you’re to nervous to do that or don’t like confrontation, talk to your RA or RD

so now that we got all that out of the way, here are some general tips about social things:

  • that whole keep your door open and people will come talk to you think is a load of bs. me and my roommate did that for weeks and no one came in. everyone is just waiting for someone else to take that chance. so go into peoples rooms and ask them if they wanna grab lunch/dinner! walk around and poke your head in their room! it might be awkward as hell but at least you’re trying :)
  • go to all (or as many) dorm activities as you can! this allows you to meet more people too even if the event is really dumb, at least show up. you always have the option to leave!
  • go to club meetings! even if you aren’t sure you want to stay in the club. it’s much harder or maybe just more awkward to join when you’re an upperclassmen, so try and get those roots down as soon as you can
  • that being said, you can always leave a group without any hard feelings. people do it all the time, so don’t be scared that once you go to one meeting you’re stuck in the group forever
  • don’t let anyone tell you that as a freshman you can’t get involved. if you want to, you can. there is absolutely nothing stopping you. you might have to work a bit harder but i know you can do it!
  • sometimes freshman year can suck, or at least have it’s moments. don’t give up. everything gets infinitely better as time goes one, i promise. if you’re having a tough time or feel isolated or overwhelmed, reach out to someone, a parent, friends from home, an old teacher, anyone really! don’t give up, things might get tough, but you ARE strong and you WILL get through it