get a fake id

another random fahc headcanon:

a lot of Ryan’s reputation as the Vagabond is worse than he actually is. Don’t get me wrong, he’s still one of the best mercenaries there is. But he isn’t nearly as cold hearted and destructive as rumors have him out to be. It takes a while for the rest of the crew to understand this though.

When Ryan first joined up, all they saw was the Vagabond. Ryan’s carefully constructed act that was created to protect himself through intimidation. He hardly talked, loomed over everyone, and made sure they all knew of the several weapons he has on him at any point in time. But he finds that he really likes everyone in the crew and slowly starts putting his guard down. Which catches everyone off guard. The first time Ryan cracks a joke over the comms in a heist everyone looses their shit.

And so Ryan starts being more comfortable and the others start learning what a huge dork he truly is. But they can’t help themselves with being cautious still, theres still all the rumors surrounding him. How he once took out an entire cities police force, how he once chopped up a body and left the remains scattered about in his own fucked up scavenger hunt, how he killed old partners of his just because he could. The stories grow worse from there and the crew never want to confront him on it. Until of course Gavin does.

Gavin makes an offhand comment about some rumor of Ryan taking the right hands off of every person he kills and Ryan just looks over at Gavin with such a confused look its almost cute. “Why the fuck would I do that? I don’t need decomposing souvenirs, I just need to get as far away as possible as soon as possible before the body gets found, taking the right hands would take too much time.”

Then everyone starts asking about other rumors about him, finding his reputation really is much worse than reality. (“No I did not kill an entire police force, that would be a waste of time and just get the FBI more on my ass.” “I need to confirm kills, you cant do that as well if you chop up the body and leave it everywhere.” “no my facepaint is not made out of blood where did you even hear that one?”).

Ryan admits that he’s fully aware that the stories and rumors about him are there and admits he spread some of his own back when he was starting in this life. It kept him protected if people were too afraid to go after him. Even if it meant everyone was too afraid to even talk to him. Except this crazy crew of course.

The crew make it a game to find the craziest rumors and ask Ryan about them. So far the only rumor they’ve never gotten an answer from though is the one that he’s killed past partners…

anonymous asked:

I'm so confused. I'm guessing they were shooting the promo, because Julie posted a similar photo last time they did, but the only person who would be able to get into that club is Even in terms of age, did everyone get a fake ID.. What's going on?!!

ok, so thanks to @skamforfaen who showed me this yesterday:

martinbeyerolsen Selvpromoterer nytt program i dag. Martin og Mikkelsen starter 2230 på NRK1 (1930 på @nrkmartinogmikkelsen

so sadly, the picture julie posted yesterday had nothing to do with skam but only with the promotion of these two norwegian comedians’ new tv show!!

if taeyong happens to get on we got married let him be, dont you want to see him reffering to his wife as ten by accident

my favorite throwaway line in the weirdmageddon trilogy is when the time cops show up and bill just “just play it cool! ditch the time punch, let me do the talking!” because it implies one of three things

1. at least one of the henchmaniacs isn’t like. old enough to drink? or allowed to legally? like fuckin’ “remember, 27 of your faces are minors, creature with 98 faces, and teeth, you’re not legally allowed to drink since the incident, so if the cops show up, tell ‘em we’re clean, okay?”

2. that time punch isn’t booze but it’s like some really strong illegal drug or something, which is funny because imagine getting arrested because you were using something called time punch. idk the name just cracks me up

3. bill isn’t old enough to drink. bill cipher, inter-dimensional nightmare, dream demon, breaker of minds…  needs a fake id to get into a bar in the nightmare realm. “i’d use his molecules to salt my margarita if i could…” yeah, sure, and he’d need pyronica or kryptos to buy that margarita for him in the first place

Look i used to be a lukas so i dont agree with his decisions in the beginning of eyewitness but i sure fucking understand where hes coming from. Internal homophobia is a real thing and i love how its portrayed.

Fake ID

Summary: You want to see the band where your crush is the lead singer of, but in order to get into the bar, you’ll need a fake ID. You’ve been told you by best friend Claire where to go to find a man who can help: Dean Winchester.

Wordcount: 940

Pairnings: Reader x Caire (friends), Reader x Dean 

Inspired by: Fake ID by Big & Rich ft. Gretchen Wilson

Great, how were you going to get to Claire’s friend for your ticket into the bar next week, when he was in an actual bar right now? 

You sighed as you stopped in front of the building, unsure eyes looking through the foggy windows. You pulled your jacket closer and fiddled with the zipper while gnawing on your lip.

“Get it together,” you muttered and took a deep breath. You had two options here:

1. Go inside, find the man Claire had described and get what you needed.

2. Run away and never get to see the band (with their cute lead singer that you were totally crushing on) you were dying to see.

Before you could decide, your feet starting moving closer to the bar. You pushed the door open and didn’t look anybody in the eye while nearing the bar.

Keep reading

More Doodles….Oh no it’s turned into a mini AU (really more like a fic than anything) 

Basically The story is Arthur and Alfred are born and raised in the country side of Kentucky. Arthur’s father plants and sells tobacco while Alfred’s breed race horses. Both go to the same school and as summer break begins for the 15 year olds Alfred offers Arthur the gloomy boy on the bus the opportunity to help around the ranch in exchange for riding lessons. 

Arthur is a quick learner and has natural talent. As he masters riding Arthur’s gloomy depressing personality changes to a self confident out spoken young man. Soon Arthur expresses interest in racing which Alfred responds with training Bess his mare to become a first class racing machine for Arthur.  

With Bess Arthur wins race after race. Unable to get enough Arthur starts lying about his age to enter in more races and even participates in the more seedy races for money. After a series of being caught for using fake IDs by police and getting attacked by angry gamblers. Arthur’s father is at his wits end and concludes that the only to correct his son’s behavior is sending him away to military boarding school. 

Alfred knows that the person Arthur has become in the last year will wither up and disappear if he’s not allowed to ride Alfred tells Arthur to runway with their wages and his mare Bess and go after his dream of racing at the Kentucky derby one day. Arthur listens and disappears into the night. It will be 10 years before the boys meet again. But more about that in another most this one is getting long lol.

I’m wondering how Logan got his driver’s license.
I mean, the man clearly knows how to drive cars and ride motorcycles, but that doesn’t mean he stood in line at the DMV like everyone else to get his license for either (because he’s practically 200 years old and he’s the Wolverine and he has no time for that bull). He has no 2-3 pieces of mail to prove where he lives because most of the time he doesn’t really “live” anywhere; he has no Social Security number because back when he was born, that system didn’t even exist. He deserves a muy grande vet pension because he fought in the Civil War, both World Wars AND Vietnam, for crying out loud; but he certainly doesn’t get that. He has no insurance of any kind. He gets zilch. Nada. Nothing. Does he just have a very convincing—albeit fake—ID, and that’s how he got a job as a chauffeur? Does anyone want to talk about this mystery with me????

It’s like, yeah I headcanon Craig and Tweek as sorta nerdy teens who like doing things, but they also do a bunch of stuff that would make them seem like degenerates.

  •  They get higher than a kite with some edibles or trip on shrooms and watch Red Racer. 
  • Tweek has a gun but for the most part he’s only ever shot cans in the woods. (He shot Butters in the foot once but it was an accident and they blamed it on terrorists) 
  • Tweek is a bit of a kleptomaniac but rather than trying to help him, Craig just asks him to steal specific things while he’s at it
  • They get their Gay Allowance™ from their parents and say they’re gonna spend it on PS4 games, but they actually just sneak into the adult section of Spencers’ with Kenny, who sports a Totally Real Fake ID and a soul patch
  • Whenever they get bored or angry they go on a date. This usually means they’re vandalizing something or shaking down a poor little middle-schooler for money.
  • Craig goes to Comic-Con yearly and comes back with a bunch of those pretty bismuth-colored knives and dick-shaped bongs. He hocks a good deal of them off to the girls (and Kenny) but saves some for his crew (Token never uses a dick bong).
  • They threaten each other when they make out, even when they’re around people.
  • Actually the fact that they make out so much is weird, they’ll start sucking face in the middle of math class because they’re bored out of their heads.
  • During one spring break they’ve anonymously committed 45 separate crimes in Denver. 


Whilst in prison Jodi Arias would take multiple video calls from fans, spending up to 9 hours a day. Girls from young as 15 would call her and Arias would advise them to get fake ID’s.

danversiism  asked:

-casually gives him a fake ID-

❛  am i getting assigned to a mission by Alpha Flight or what  ?  ‘cause you do know i have like,  50  of these already.  i made them when i was,  y’know,  BORED.  ❜


Craig stumbled out of the bar that he had used his fake ID to get in to. He had also managed to steal his mom’s credit card that particular night after a rough fight with both of his parents. He knew he’d be in deep shit for it later, but right now he didn’t care as a matter fact right now he couldn’t really feel anything including the tips of his fingers. He was tingly all over, and to be honest he was kind of dazed it was hard to even really tell where he was anymore he didn’t want to go home though that was for sure.

He dug deep in to the pockets of his skinny jeans for his cigarettes to light up and try and sober up a little bit before walking somewhere. After lighting up and taking a big drag he blew the smoke out as he leaned against a stop sign moving again to dig in his pockets this time for his phone he scrolled through his contacts and started to text Clyde and then Tweek hoping that either one of them would be awake and up to letting him stay with them.

He began to sway slightly as he felt a few raindrops hit the bridge of his nose, great, just what he needed, rain. He began to look around and took shelter underneath the bar canopy before slowly deciding it was probably best to start walking somewhere, anywhere, but as he went to move he stumbled a bit and dropped his phone cracking it on the sidewalk he cursed loudly and picked up the broken phone looking around in a slight panic now. How was he going to get a hold of anybody? He saw a kid across the street wearing something orange, a jacket probably? Anyway he was clearly about his age but he couldn’t really tell who it was due to being so drunk he jogged across the street and called out to the other.

“H-hey dude do you mind if I use your phone? I dropped mine and it’s kind of really jacked up I’m just trying to find a place to stay and it’s starting to rain…” he felt kind of pathetic asking a stranger for a favor or at least who he thought was a stranger…. The alcohol was beginning to take its toll on him he felt like he was in between passing out and throwing up which was never a good thing especially being out in public. There was no way he was going to call his mom. He had stubbornly decided he’d rather sleep on the street first which wasn’t the safest thing with all the homeless people around South Park.


Stan, without fail, as long as his radio is working, has heard “On the Road Again” as he’s fleeing between cities. Usually leaving town with a boatload of angry people behind him. Trying to figure out where he can get the supplies to make his next fake ID just in case the Danvers family has more connections than he thought, even in two states over.

And he hates it. He hates that song with a passion. It always sounds like Willie Nelson is mocking him. He ain’t got any friends, and he’s not happy to be on the road again. What’s so great about being on the road, huh? Every time he hears those guitar strings strumming, he jerks his hand out and changes the station, settling on static when he can’t afford to split his focus just yet.

Except, sometimes he just lets it play. On the days where he decided it was time to just move on, before his luck turns, sometimes he lets the whole song play. As Nelson waxes on, Stan listens, wishing he were just out for a drive, letting Ford pick the easy-listening country, and laughing at the twangs in the singer’s voice.

Tiberius x Tatiana

It was still raining when Tatiana’s eyes slowly fluttered open in the morning. She yawned and stretched, rolling on her side. The clock read 8:24. To her it was still early, but to her new husband, she’d slept in.

Tatiana rolled her eyes and flung the sheets off her body, she looked down at her belly, which seemed to get bigger every week. Soon she wouldn’t be able to sleep comfortably on her side.

She had met Tiberius shortly after she turned 18. He was drinking at the hotel bar, a crisp and expensive suit on. Tatiana had used her older sister’s fake ID to get in, and she was glad she had. After a few drinks and some chatting, he invited her up to his hotel room. 
She knew who Tiberius was, she had always seen him in the tabloids: “The wealthy son, spending his money on booze and women.” After their night together he hadn’t called, which was not a surprise at all, and Tatiana didn’t mind. She was enjoying being young and uncommitted…until the pregnancy test gave her a “smiley face.” She had shown her best friend, and she recalled her saying “Why the fuck is it smiling, who’s happy about this?” Tatiana imagined most women in a committed relationship awaiting a bouncing baby would be excited about “this shit.”

Tatiana had managed to get in touch with Tiberius, and of course, he insisted they raise the child together. After five months of being together, she still knew very little about her husband to be. She knew he proposed and they were to be married before the baby arrived, for his public image. She knew he was exactly 12 years older than she was…he had just turned 30 before she met him. She knew his family was heavily involved in politics and that he was the sole heir of their enormous fortune. Tatiana had also come to know that he had a slight drinking problem and that he had a hard time controlling his temper, but she knew all that would fade once the baby was born.

Tatiana rolled out of bed and slid on her furry slippers, smiling as they warmed her feet. She threw on a housecoat and slowly made her way into the kitchen, where she saw Tiberius reading the newspaper and drinking his morning coffee.

She smiled and crept behind him, wrapping her arms around him and kissing his cheek. “Good morning my love,” she whispered in his ear.

Tiberius gently patted her hand and smiled slightly, not taking his eyes off the paper, “Good morning,” he said politely.

Tatiana rolled her eyes and sat next to him, noticing the headline on the paper had something to do with his family.

“What is it now?” she tried to ask with genuine sounding curiosity.

Tiberius shrugged, “Just more bullshit about my brother and his drug addiction. You’d think they would get tired, hm?” he asked, but it wasn’t really a question, he didn’t care what she thought.

Tatiana shrugged, “Doesn’t matter, he’s not even here, right? He’s in rehab.”

“Mmhm” Tiberius couldn’t even look at her, but she didn’t care.

“We have that appointment for the baby today, remember?” She asked, but she knew he had forgotten, or didn’t care.

Tiberius nodded and smiled, “Yeah, I remember, booked off the afternoon for it. Can’t wait to see little man.”

Tatiana was shocked at his response, but she smiled happily. “How do you know it’s a boy, hm?” she asked playfully.

“I hope it’s a boy anyways”