get a fake id

Be My Boyfriend

[ao3]

“Dean, be my boyfriend!” Castiel hissed.

Dean’s attention was pulled away from Charlie (who snorted into her drink) when Castiel grabbed his arm.

“Uh,” Dean said, feeling like he was missing out on some vital information. Castiel’s wide eyes were a little too bright and his cheeks were flushed with pink, indicating that he was probably a little bit drunk, though that still didn’t help clear up the situation.

“Come here!” Castiel dragged Dean by the arm across the crowded room until they stood in front of a short brunette who Dean thought was named Meg. Castiel wrapped his arm around Dean’s waist and squeezed him to his side.

“I told you!” he told Meg triumphantly. “I have a boyfriend!”

Meg looked Dean up and down incredulously. “You’re dating Dean Winchester?”

Starting to catch on, Dean put a possessive arm around Castiel’s shoulders. “Yeah, he is. Got a problem with that?”

Keep reading

anonymous asked:

Ideas for how a pair of teenagers could meet? (non-cliche please)

  • They volunteer at the same place.
  • Person A is part of a flash mob that B finds themselves in the middle of at the mall. They try to dance along but fail horribly because they don’t know the moves. A finds this hilarious.
  • A gets busted at a club for giving a fake ID. Person B behind them is sweating bullets because they were going to try the same thing and casually get out of line and start a conversation with A.
  • Person B tries sledding down the grassy hill behind their school on a lunch tray. They end up eating dirt on the way down and trip Person A. They talk a bit while getting patched up.
  • Person A runs across the road to pet Person B’s dog. Or: They join a group on Facebook for a breed of dog that has meetups. Person A has that kind of dog. Person B wants one but can’t while living with their parents so they just want to pet the dogs. Person B is extremely happy at the next planned meetup and thinks A’s dog is the cutest of the group. (And that A is the cutest of the group - after the dogs, of course.)
  • Everyone else chickens out, so they end up doing the senior prank together.
  • A is the teenager that snuck out of the house on a summer night. B is on the window night shift at the closest McDs.
Good Girl CH 1: Tequila and Bad Decisions

Chapter 2, CH 3CH 4, CH 5. CH 6, CH 7, CH 8, CH 9, CH 10, CH 11, CH 12 CH 13, CH 14, CH 15, CH 16, CH 17, CH 18, CH 19, CH 20, CH 21, CH 22, CH 23, CH 24, CH 25

I scan the crowd of both Asians and Americans but regardless of races I can say confidently that they are all pretty shady. My eyes go to my grinning friend Jihyo, who has somehow convinced me to come to a very nice club that just happens to be crawling with creeps. Some of her other friends had told her how amazing the club, EXO, was but seem to forget that you have to either look really slutty or really rich to get in. That is how I ended up having to take off my jacket and stockings and now have to stand in line in the freezing cold in nothing but a tight leather skirt and one of Jihyo’s crop tops that could pass for a bra. She is in a similar skimpy out fit, but she is actually wearing her only pair of shorts like that which meant I had to wear the skirt.

“How much longer?” I groan as I begin jogging in place, something I found easy in her five-inch heels.

She rolls her fake green eyes at me, “We haven’t been waiting that long.”

“It’s been an hour. What are they waiting for?” I glance down the line toward the closed doors.

“I thought you didn’t wanna come?” She teases with a confident grin.

I scoff at her, “I still don’t, it just happens to be better than freezing my ass off out here.”

“Maybe if you go shake it up there we can get in.” She gestures to the large bouncer standing outside the main door.

“Fuck that, I would much rather fuck Hoseok to get in,” Jihyo grins at the mention of her friend that works in the club and also happens to have a massive crush on me.

“Would you please? I offered but he didn’t believe me that you would follow threw.”

I glare at her, “You offered what?”

“Your precious virginity,” She grins at me evilly.

“Ugh don’t say stuff like that.”

She continues to tease me, “What, can’t handle the truth that you’re a 17 year old virgin?”

“Not all of us can be lucky enough to lose their virginity in a school bathroom when we were 14,” I snap back. She just grins at my mean words. “I can’t believe that you offered my virginity to some guy to get into a club,” I pause as I rethink my words, “That’s a lie, I expect nothing less from you.”

“I learned my bitchiness from you.”

“I’m giving this place five more minutes than I’m leaving, with or without you.”

She fakes hurt, “You would leave me to get drunk at a club by myself?”

“Yes, what will you do without someone to take care of your drunken self?” I pat the younger girl’s head.

Just then the doors to the club opened and the bouncer starts weeding through the people lined up in front of him. I’m not surprised when lots of the guys or undeniably less attractive girls start getting denied and pushed out of the line as others get to go inside. When it’s our turn to be checked out, again, I’m not surprised when the bouncer waves us in without as much of a glance at the fake IDs we worked hard to get, though I understand why. Jihyo is an undeniable beauty with her long raven locks and perfect doll like face. With the body of a fitness goddess and legs for miles, I have always envied her 5’6 height. Standing at a small 5 foot but thankfully 5’5 in heels, I’m still dwarfed next to the beautiful girl. Though I won’t admit it out loud I’m quiet a looker myself.

Being from a Korean father and a mother who is a mutt herself I was lucky enough to inherit some very good qualities from different races. The nice curves and wavy locks that I received from my dark skinned mom seem to fit my cat like eyes I got for my dad. Though I also got my short height from my dad’s side of the family too. My hair is a blend of them, giving me perfect loose, black waves that hang daintily against my back.

“Jooyoung!” Jihyo brings me out of my thoughts to have me gawk at the massive club with her. The bar is to the left; circle booths line two of the other walls while the huge DJ booth takes up most of the other wall. Lights flash as the music blares through the massive speakers making it hard to hear what Ji is trying to say to me. Realizing that I can’t hear a word she is saying she just nods her head in direction of the bar. I follow, our hands locked together to make sure we don’t loose each other in the thick crowd. Once we reach the bar Ji manages to find an empty stool that she quickly places me on. She stands close behind me, her hands resting on the bar, locking me in and all the others out. Even though I’m older Ji is taller and a little bit bigger than me, something that has made her a little over protective, though I don’t really need it in places like this. Even though she is always the one bringing me to them and the trouble along with her.

“Four shots of tequila!” She yells to the hot bartender, who grins at us. Farther down behind the bar we see none other than Hoseok busy mixing drinks and flirting with customers. So different from his normal cutesy self, he seems so much hotter with his hair pushed back and a sly smirk on his face.

“Damn,” I accidently say out loud. Ji follows my eyes and grins. That grin stays as the bartender places the four shots in front of us. Giving me two and keeping two for her self, Ji raises the first one and holds it up to me expectantly. I hold my little glass to hers’.

“To getting drunk!” She clinks our glasses and moves to drink but stops as I begin downing mine, “And to getting layed!” With that she does hers’ in one go like me. We both slam the shot glass back down on the counter, grimacing as the awful liquid burns its way down our throats. I glare at her little add in to our toast.

“I’ll sleep with someone when I want to!”

“Who said it was for you? I need some fun too, it’s been way to long.” She teases as she rests her head on my shoulder, grabbing her other shot and, again, holding it up to mine. “How about to you just doing something that will get you out of your funk and make you that happy go lucky girl I met in elementary?”

I give her a soft smile, clinking our glasses and down the shot. “Four more!”

“That’s what I’m talking about!”

“I’m so going to regret this in the morning.”

“Oh shut up, when was the last time you got actually drunk? You are the best person to be around when your drunk, you’re just so cute and friendly.”

“I turn into a child. That’s not how I want to be in a public area with creepy guys all over the place.”

“You’re a step a head of most since those killer instincts seem to keep working threw your buzz. I wouldn’t question anything if Freddy Kruger himself came up and offered me a ride home. But you, you can see threw the best con man after downing a bottle of tequila.”

“It’s a gift.”

“One of few,” She tease as she holds up a shot, “To me becoming a better judge of character and to you becoming more careless. I’m tired of being the only one walking up in a stranger’s bed.”

As more and more shots are downed and things wrong with my life are listed I have never been so grateful but so annoyed with this girl at the same time. She is the only person I share anything with, the only person who even somewhat knows what’s going on in the mess I call my head. But as she stands there telling me all the things I should be worried about or work on I get kind of angry. After having enough shots for now, I pull the tall girl to the dance floor with me, hoping to shut her pretty mouth up. We dance like there is no tomorrow, forgetting all that is troubling us; actually I seem to be the only one with troubles.

As hours fly by of dancing and more shots here and there my mind begins to fog. I stop caring about the unknown hands that grope me, too focused on my high and the music. My feet are numb and my legs feel like jello but I some how continue to stay on my feet. Jihyo is a grinning mess in front of me, twirling around and stumbling every few minutes. It has been along time since I’ve felt this good, this free, like nothing could ever hold me back. Jihyo would have usually abandoned me by this time and I would take that as an okay to find a way home but not tonight. I am no one’s babysitter tonight!

Suddenly the crowd starts moving toward the DJ stand, they all huddle, trying to see something that must be pretty interesting. Being the nosy girl she is, Ji tries to drag me along with the rest of the crowd to find out what is going on. I try to pull her away from the gawking people, knowing whatever it is, it can’t be good.

Running away isn’t a possibility with Ji trying to pull me the other way and the crowd pulling me as a whole. As my instincts scream at me to run, the sound of gunshots can heard above the music. The pull of the crowd towards the noise is gone as people try to avoid the bullets that are flying in every direction. My eyes scan the crowd, seeing at least a dozen people on the floor either crying out for help or already dead. Blood covers the almost empty dance floor. Without another thought I start dragging Jihyo to the bathroom as the rest of the crowd breaks out in a panic as they all drunkenly scramble to the front door. Some how through my very drunken state I’m able to maneuver Jihyo and myself through the small bathroom window, out into the empty alleyway. The cold nips at my cheeks as the wind blows it’s freezing air around us.

Jihyo lands on her butt, “Ya! That hurt!” She whines loudly.

“Shut up you idiot!” I scan the alley for anyone else who exited the club, finding a van waiting. On the other side of a massive garbage bin the back door to the club busts open. A long line of extremely attractive guys strut out, the last one, who is taller than the rest, has something large, and strangely human shaped, hanging over his shoulder. I slam Jihyo and myself up against the wall and pry that they don’t see us. To be completely honest, I couldn’t careless about my own safety but Jihyo has so much to live for, I don’t want to risk her life.

“Joo-ah!” She calls out drunkenly, drawing the attention of the last of the men.

God dammit you dumb bitch! I love you, but you dumb bitch! I scream in my head as I hear their footsteps coming our way. In a desperate moment I whisper an apology as I punch her across the face, knocking the drunk girl out easily. Quickly I throw the stray trash bags on top of her, hiding her from who ever is coming. I’m crouching down next to where I’m hiding her, behind the garbage bin when someone comes rushing down the alley way on my side. The person stops when he sees the group of men coming his way. I can easily see the terror on the poor man’s face as he reaches one of the over hanging lights just a few feet away from me.

My heart stops when another gunshot rings out in the alley. I watch as the man drops to his knees, clutching his stomach his eyes drift away from his killers to me. The anxiety building up in my chest almost bursts when the gun fires again, this time hitting the man’s forehead, making him collapse, his eyes never leaving mine. But as if my heart knows what is to come it pounds harder than I’ve ever felt it before, as the footsteps continue toward us.

The suspense of them finding me begins to annoy me. My chest is hurting from the tightness of my anxiety and my thighs don’t appreciate being stuck in a low wall sit for this long. But it finally happens. A man dressed in all black stands over the body for a minute before crouching down and going through his pockets. He pulls out the dead man’s wallet and flips it open, automatically finding something that makes him sigh.

“Poor bastard had a family. What a shame, should watch wear he wanders.” The man mumbles to himself, dropping the wallet on the man’s chest. I debate on whether I’m a horrible person or not for not busting out in tears at the fact an innocent man was just murdered in front of me and that I could possibly next. The low amount of empathy I normally have for people seems to have reached an all time low when I realize how I feel absolutely nothing for the dead man in front of me.

But instead I study the killer. He looks young, but from the way he carries himself I feel as if he must be older. In a nice suit, which was obviously made for him, he is extremely handsome. The uncaring expression on his child like face tells me this is something he has done many times before, something that should disturb me more than is does. Just as he is about to stand up he pauses, his eyes not really focused on anything. I resist the urge to scream as he tilts his head and his cat like eyes find me. “Hello there baby girl,” The cat man purrs with a threating yet attractive smile.

L headcanons round 2
  • writes shitty paperback crime novels under increasingly ridiculous aliases in between cases
  • expert at body popping 
  • unironically listens to vocaloid
  • once watched 48 straight hours of true crime documentaries until watari found him and made him get up and take a walk
  • really good at giving massages
  • once fell asleep with his eyes open; matsuda still hasn’t gotten over it
  • he’ll bite his nails all he wants and that’s fine, but if a nail breaks and it’s not directly his responsibility, he’s distraught. ‘only I get to demolish my fingernails, light, this is a disaster’
  • uses fake IDs to get out of parking tickets
  • sometimes gets on the tube and rides around a few times while staring at people
  • makes up absurd rumors about himself and spreads them around wammys house in disguise
  • to light’s horror, he smells pretty nice
Last night I cried because the days were speeding up –
When did the space between sunrise and sunset
become shorter than a breath?
-
Just yesterday I was thirteen, pasting black liner around my eyes
and emphasizing the exclamation mark between panic and the disco;
each month felt like a decade, each new year a miracle.
-
Today my girlfriend’s two-year visa runs out;
I remember when she got it, wrapped in shiny silver packaging,
just yesterday.
When we went out to celebrate, I held my breath as I surrendered a fake ID.
Today I don’t even get carded.
-
I type this on an old laptop with a cracked and bleeding screen,
which was once a “coming soon” fantasy on the Apple website.
-
Maybe it wouldn’t be so bad if the days got better as they sped up,
but I’ve started to measure time by the rocks in my stomach,
the weights on my shoulders,
and the laugh lines around my mouth, which are now just lines.
They are the only thing that change.
-
Already, a week has passed since I started to write this poem
on the back of an old bookstore receipt.
The receipt is dated from six months ago,
although I bought that book
just yesterday.
—  Just Yesterday, When We Were Young
Dating Sebastian Smythe would include...

Originally posted by grantsass

a/n: i needed my seb seb 

(IF ANYONE WILL BE MY SEBASTIAN RP, MESSAGE ME)

  • Sebastian would be super proud to call you his
  • knowing him, he would love to show you off
  • one of his favorite things is bringing you to Warbler practice
  • you would help him tie his tie
  • he would be protective when you went to McKinley
  • New Directions being confused when seeing him be nice to you
  • Sebastian giving you his lacrosse jersey
  • “Can you sing to me?”
  • he would constantly speak French to you since you think it’s sexy
  • you steal his Warbler blazer sometimes
  • him showing his dance moves ;)
  • you would go to all his competitions and lacrosse games
  • having duets when you two are alone
  • making out in his car
  • he would get you a fake ID so both of you can go to the club
  • you would watch him work out
  • Sebastian would love you saying his name
  • Kurt getting uppity 
    • “I’m bi, bitch.” “Seb, be nice.” “Being nice sucks.”
  • he would get you a Warbler calendar
  • when he has his long hair, you would braid it
  • using his tie for dIFFERENT THINGS IF YOU KNOW WHAT I MEAN
  • he would get you expensive presents cuz he a rich boy
  • you would surprise kiss him all the time
  • he would get fake mad but he loves it
Bean

*Inspired by the ask about guardians/ghosts following someone to Elsewhere. I’m not much of a writer but I’ll try.

**********************************************

 I was sitting on my grandmothers lap, telling her about all the exciting things

(that happen in a 5 year olds day. I was telling her how the water in the drinking fountain at the school gurgled when I slid off her lap and ran into the kitchen. 

“ Mom! I yelled “Bean came with us to Grandma’s house" 

“Who’s Bean?” Grandma asked, and mom told her.

“She likes to pretend she has lots of friends who live with her, so she can play with them whenever she wants. Apparently Bean lives in the attic and her mom has is blue. Isn’t that right Sweetie?” Mom asked and I nodded. “Henry thinks it isn’t healthy to let her pretend things like that, says it’s promoting delusional behaviors. But I say, If it keeps her busy, How bad can it be?”

 Their laughter and voices faded into the background as I stared at the thin figure standing in front of me. I reached out my hand and they took it. I smiled. They smiled back.

*******************************************

  I was 9, hiding behind the couch as my parents screamed at each other when I saw them next. Crouched next to me. They moved a little closer and leaned their head on my shoulder and put a hand on my back. A quiet sorrowful hope seemed to flood through me and we both cried together.

*******************************************

   I was lying in my bed, angry, so angry at myself for being so stupid, at Amy for getting me a fake ID, at mom for not believing me. Angry at the man flirting with me for not realizing I was only 16, Angry at him for not accepting a no. For not respecting my boundaries, for listening to me crying for him to stop. I was so angry and sad and confused as Bean slid through my open door and climbed onto the bed beside me. I looked up into eyes filled with more anger then there seemed to be in mine. A cold, echoing, whisper filled the room.

“You deserved so much better” I nodded in agreement and let my eyes close, as they climbed off my bed and crawled out the window. Next morning,on the news, a picture of the mans face filled the screen along with the headline, Mans Body Found in Shreds, Only Head Intact. I smiled and vomited into my bowl of cereal.

******************************************

  I hadn’t applied to Elsewhere University, but when I got the acceptance letter I decided to go. It was far away from everyone and everything I knew. It would be a fresh start.

  I was already moved into my dorm, my fish on my dresser, my clothes folded neatly inside of it, and blankets in a heap on my bed when I met my roommate. They swept into the dorm, nearly knocking their head on the low doorway. They swept me into a hug as soon as they saw me, their bony limbs nearly crushing me. 

  “Belle” They said in echoing, not quite right voice, using the name I had registered during orientation, not the one they knew  "It’s so good to see you.“

  "Why?  Why do you protect me like this?” I asked, my mind going to the things I needed to say instead of small talk, like it always did when I was around them. 

  “Because you are my child, and I love you” They ran their fingers through my hair, over my pointed ears, my too dark eyes, and I understood.

  “I love you too”

x

2

Adrian: “I’m so glad I ran into you- I was just about to head home actually. All the guys had to ditch me to go home to their wives and girlfriends you know”

Lennon: [sweats] “And what about you?” 

Adrian: [clears throat] “Oh yeah you noticed the ring, huh? My wife and I actually seperated a few months ago after I caught her with some dude from work. I’m just having trouble getting rid of my ring- makes it more final I guess”

Lennon: “Oh, I’m sorry that happened to you” 

Adrian: “Don’t be, its fine really. Now enough about me and my tragedies, tell me more about you” 

Happy Birthday Keith

Keith had never been more uncomfortable in his life. He was sat in a booth alone with loud obnoxious music in his ear and his friends no where in sight.
Some birthday this was shaping up to be.
“Hey big boy, someone ordered you a very special birthday present.”
Keith turned round his eyes widening when he realised the man about to give him a lap dance was none other then his hated science partner.
“Lance?”
Lance’s eyes widened in recognition “oh shit Keith!”
Lance stumbled back knocking a waitress carrying a tray of drinks that just happened to spill all over Keith.
This is what Keith gets for letting his friends drag him to a strip club for his birthday.

He stood up shaking the cheap booze from his hair as he glared at where Lance was apologising to the waitress.

Keith tried not to stare at Lance’s bare chest and sinfully long legs that pulled the eye towards his right blue g string.

Keith told himself that it wasn’t because he was attracted to him, it’s just he was used to the Lance that wore over sized sweaters and a large pair of glasses.

The Lance that had a constant state of bed head.

The Lance that always seemed half asleep in class as he rubbed his eyes making him look super cute…

Wait cute!

Keith shook his head “What the hell are you doing here!”

Lance sheepishly smiled at him “Well I work here.”

“You can’t, Lance your only sevente-“ Keith was cut off my Lance jumping forwards putting his hand over his mouth.

“Shut it mullet!” Lance hissed looking around before pulling him into a VIP booth drawing the curtain closed behind him.

“Look everyone here thinks I’m my older brother that’s 22, my family needs the money and I enjoy the work.” Lance explained.

“It’s not right though, Lance your a kid.” Keith tried to stand up but Lance used one foot to push him back down. It was then that Keith realised three things.

One. Lance was wearing tall black heals.

Two. Lance looked amazing in heals.

Three. Keith’s pants suddenly felt a lot tighter.

“Please your only a year older then me, I know for a fact you used a fake ID to get in here Mr Shiro.” Lance smirked as he pushed Keith further down onto the slightly sticky couch that Keith pretended was soda.

“How about I show you just how good I am at my job?”

Lance smirked and all Keith could managed to stutter out was “o-ok.”

—————————


“I wonder where Keith is.” Hunk frowned as they looked around the club.

Pidge smirked “I’m guessing operation Klance went off without a hitch.”

Hunk looked down at her in confusion “what does that mean?”

She patted his arm “Don’t worry about it big guy, come on I don’t think we will be seeing Keith again until Monday. Can’t let his cake go to waste. He’s already getting some.”

anonymous asked:

That coaches fic was brilliant buy it made me think. We've seen Chris and Victor being crazy and extra whereas phichit and yuuri are more subtle. How about a story where it's revealed that the two were arrested for like destruction of property or some other stupid prank while they were drunk and Celestine has to bail them out. And this comes to light when they run into the police officer at an event in detroit?

Innocent (Sequel to Ranting)

“Can you believe it? He wanted a live band to play while he skated. A LIVE ROCK BAND!” Alain groaned while rubbing his forehead, while the other three males at the table hid snickers of amusement behind their classes of beer.

“That isn’t allow,” Lilia said ever so softly while frowning at the destressed Canadian, “Right?”

“Exactly!” Alain shouted.

“It’s okay, Alain, we have all dealt with troublesome skaters,” Josef said while patting the upset Canadian shoulders.

“Everyone but Celestino,” Yakov mumbled.

“Hey!” Celestino said while raising an eyebrow, “Where did you get that impression?”

“Your ‘horror’ stories are mild at best,” Josef pointed out.

“Media scandals are your most common complain about your Thai Prince,” Alain pointed out.

“Phichit isn’t a prince. Don’t let him hear you say that,” Celestino said seriously before taking a large sip of his drink.

“I am interested to hear what type of complaints you have for your skaters that doesn’t involve social media,” Lilia spoke up, getting hums of agreement from the three other male coaches.

“Any of you ever had to bail any of your skaters out of jail?” Celestino questioned, causing the table to go quiet.

“Jail?” Alain questioned in surprise.

“Yep. When I was in America with Phichit and Yuuri, they got themselves arrested,” Celestino sighed deeply.

“Dare I ask why?” Lilia questioned with a frown.

Celestino opened his mouth, only to pause and let out a loud sigh.

“God, it is such a stupid story,” Celestino mumbled more to himself than his fellow.

“Now I really want to hear this,” Alain mumbled, earning a chuckle from Josef.

“Simply, it involved alcohol, spray cans and government property,” Celestino said with a sigh.

“That sounds,” Yakov started before trailing off, letting out a sigh and shaking his head.

“Boys will be boys,” Lilia pointed out, earning a deep sigh for Celestino.

“You say that, Miss Lilia, but my boys aren’t wild child’s unless alcohol is involved,” Celestino insisted while lifting up his beer and slamming it down onto the table again.

“Do explain,” the former prima ballerina said, waving her hand in a circular motion.

“Hold on a second,” Josef spoke up, “The drinking age in America is twenty-one.”

“That it is,” Celestino said with a nod.

“Thai Prince isn’t twenty-one,” Alain continued, earning a nod from Josef.

“I’m well aware,” Celestino groaned.

“Okay, I really need to hear this story now,” Alain said while catching a waitress as she hurried passed and ordered another round of drinks for the table.

“Yuuri had just turned twenty-one,” Celestino started before pausing to finish his beer which was half spilt across the table. “And gave them both a weekend off, let Yuuri experience adulthood, you know?”

Celestino paused and gave the other four coaches at the table a pleading look, clearly wanting them to agree with him.

“I did give Victor the weekend after his eighteen off,” Yakov mumbled.

“Do not remind me,” Josef mumbled with a sigh, “The current skating legend took my sweet, innocent Chris out clubbing. When he was underage!”

“Chris is far from sweet and innocent,” Alain snorted.

“I would have to agree. I feel like out of Victor and Chris, Victor is the more… innocent one,” Lilia piped up, earning a hum of agreement from Celestino and Alain.

“Okay, back to my story,” Celestino said as new drinks were brought to the table.

“So, gave the boys the weekend off, expecting Yuuri to go out with a few friends, experience alcohol and swear himself off the liquids for life. But no,” Celestino shook his head with a pained look on his face, “No, Phichit – somehow – gets his hands on a fake ID and convinces Yuuri to go out clubbing with him.”

“Doesn’t sound that bad yet,” Josef said while helping the waitress collect all the empty glasses.

“Did I mention that Yuuri is a horrible drunk?” Celestino asked while glancing around the table.

“I was at the banquet,” Yakov sighed.

“I’ve heard all about that banquet,” Alain pipped up.

“Do not remind me,” Josef sighed while shaking his head.

“What banquet?” Lilia questioned, earning a groan from Josef.

“Last years. Yuuri Katsuki got drunk, pole danced with Chris and somehow convinced Victor to be his coach, half naked might I point out,” Alain said with a bright smile.

“I… see,” Lilia said while slowly nodding her head.

“Yuuri isn’t a good drunk. It runs in the family,” Celestino explained with a weak smile, “Anyway, Phichit and Yuuri went out clubbing. Somehow, after getting kicked out of the club, for fighting, they somehow appeared sober enough to buy spray cans.”

“And then they vandalised some state propriety?” Alain guessed.

“Three police cars, a state library, the seventh floor of a popular hotel,” Celestino listed off, only to pause when Yakov held up a hand.

“Whoa, what? Seventh floor?” Yakov questioned confused.

“Yep, outside walls,” Celestino sighed sadly.

“Outside walls?” Alain gasped in surprise.

“I’m not even done,” Celestino said blankly.

“When did they get caught?” Lilia questioned with a frown on her face.

“They didn’t, they turned themselves in,” Celestino groaned.

“This… doesn’t surprise me,” Josef admitted.

“How much was it to bail them out?” Yakov questioned with a raised eyebrow.

Celestino gave all the other coaches are sorrowful look, “The police didn’t believe Phichit and Yuuri were the culprits because they were… too sweet.”

Alain started to laugh loudly at Celestino comment, laughing so hard that the table shook.

“Both boys do come off as rather… innocent,” Lilia said while giving Celestino a small smile.

“Neither of them are innocent, trust me,” Celestino mumbled before taking a large sip of his drink.

“Okay, so what have we learnt?” Josef asked, a smirk on his lips.

“That Celestino has the most innocent skaters?” Yakov said, the corner of his lip turned upright slightly.

“Over twenty-thousand dollars’ worth of government property damage!” Celestino declared loudly.

“Innocent,” Lilia agreed with a nod of her head.

“They beheaded the college statue!” Celestino groaned.

“At least your skaters don’t have a stamp tramp,” Alain groaned.

“Not again with the stamp tramp, Alain,” Yakov mumbled while sending the Canadian a bored look.

“They sent three people to the hospital with broken bones!” Celestino almost sobbed as he leant forwards and rested his forehead against the table.

“It’s okay now,” Lilia said while ever so awkwardly patting the long-haired man’s back.

“MY OWN SON HAS A STAMP TRAMP!” Alain yelled loudly while glaring at Yakov, “I have lost my pride!”

“At least you don’t have to dry clean your skaters costume after every use.”

The table grew silent at Josef’s words and the bald man nodded his head sadly.

“Gross,” Alain mumbled while shaking his head.

“I… have to agree,” Lilia said with a disgusted look on her face.

“They broke into a pet store and stole thirty-two hamsters,” Celestino ever so quietly mumbled into the table.

Mickey "The shitty Boyfriend" Milkovich

Mickey and ian have known each other there whole life.

Mickey was there for ian the first time monica showed up. He was there to make him realize Kash was taking advantage of him. He was there for ian when ian wanted to go to military school. When ian was studying his geometry shit. When he didn’t get into military school because they gave the scholarship to lip. When he was taking away by CPS. He gave him advice about being in the groups home. Gave him a place to stay so he wouldn’t have to stay in the group home. He was there when ian left. He went after him, to look for him. He got him off the side walked where he had just been drugged and molested. He took him home. He gave him his bed to sleep it off. HE GAVE HIM A BLOW JOB WHENEVER HE WANTED IF IT MEANT IAN WOULD STAY. he came out for ian. In front of his dad. He went and look for help when he didn’t know why ian didn’t want to get out of bed. He never once gave up on ian when fiona, lip and everyone wanted to take him to a ward. He was go8ng to take care ohf him. He her us. Ian was fucking family. He gave ian a home. He let ian take care of the child ian swore to love so much. He didn’t get mad when ian LITERALLY STOLE HIS BABY. He went to look for ian. To bail him out. He understood what was going wasn’t ian fault, that he couldn’t help it. He took ian to the get help. He was there first thing the other day when visiting hours started. He went back to ian, even tho he realized thing were going to be harder now. He jumped on top of an army officer when they were gonna take ian away. He went after ian AGAIN when he ran away with monica. He pour his guts out to ian, said he loved him and ian broke up with him. He risked getting caught by the police just to see ian one more time. He told ian his plans. He said you “should come” ONCE. He never repeated ian going to Mexico, the complete opposite actually, he kept saying “tell me goodbye”, “this goodbye?”

I’m so tired of the mickey hate I keep seeing. People saying his a shitty ex, forcing ian. Saying he doesn’t care about ians dreams and future. That’s bullshit. Ian’s a grown ass man. He made the decision to go with mickey. He had a choice. He made that choice. HE WANTED TO GO. Mickey didn’t take him away from anything. Ian isn’t getting a fake ID or passport. He is still ian gallagher the EMT. He can get a job where ever the fuck he likes. Mickey is not a shitty ex. He won’t “set a match to ians life” maybe he might give it a little more purpose. Ian himself said he hasn’t felt that thrill again. Not with anyone. If you think mickey is a shitty ex or is wrong for ian or destructive or whatever, you must be watching a different show. And if there relationship was destructive, (AFTER SEASON 3)it wasn’t on mickey’s part

RICHIE N HIS TATTOOS

from ultra dearheart @whipashwhipash in the whooper’s club (represent my lads) ‘do a hc where Richie gets a tattoo … and then richie shows eds the tattoo … and eddie cries’ 

  • okay so we all know about punk!richie
  • and we all know this headcanon about him getting tattoos
  • but get this:
  • sneaky fake ID owning richie getting a tattoo at like 17
  • anyway so Rich has wanted to tell eddie that he loves him for ages
  • because they’re together but
  • neither has said ‘I Love You’ since they’ve been official
  • and ADHD, impulsive richie just thinks ‘fuck it’
  • he gets Bill to draw the design 
  • Bill sighs and is like ‘Richie i stg do not fuck it up’ (good luck nd DONT fuck it up - Bill as RuPaul)
  • Bill draws, i kid u not, a pasta plate of Spaghetti and Meatballs 
  • and next to it, a teeny old school inhaler
  • like i mean those old green ones idk what American inhalers look like now
  • and he’s grinning just LOOKING at the design and he’s so buzzed to have his boy on him forever!!!
  • he goes to this little high street tattoo parlour
  • and it’s clean but he knows eds would have a heart attack if he saw him in there
  • so he books it for when his boy will be at school and he slinks off and gets it done
  • the gal who does his tattoo just sits and listens to him talk about eds whilst she does it 
  • and she gives him her number and is like
  • ‘DUDE TELL ME HOW IT GOES’ because. everyone loves reddie lbh
  • he gets it and he loves it so bloody much
  • and then he leaves and drives to Eddie’s house
  • he sits in the car for like 5 minutes just grinning in the little flip down mirror, practicing what he’ll say to eds
  • before he realises he’s always been a spur-of-the-moment kinda person
  • so he jumps out of the car and climbs up to Ed’s window like he always does, knocking gently
  • then he sees Eds doing the BIGGEST FKIN SMILE because he’s seen him and wow
  • his heart goes ba-dumb
  • he doesn’t even get a chance to form words, he flops in through the teeny gap, not letting eddie open it properly
  • stands in the middle of eds room an just.
  • pulls his fuckin shirt up to where the tattoo is
  • i imagine it’d be like the line where the band of a bra ends idk how to explain it
  • eddie doesn’t look properly at first and just looks back up at richie like
  • ‘ARE YOU FUCKING SERIOUS, TOZIER? YOU COULD HAVE AIDS?!?!?’
  • and he talks for a solid two minutes about intravenous drug needles being reused for tattoos because its 1990s america 
  • richie is watching with this stupid lovesick smile and puppy eyes
  • and then he’s finally like ‘eds look’
  • and eddie GASPS
  • he’s like ‘oh my GOD RICHIE’
  • tears r welling in his eyes and it’s making richie tear up too bc,, damn
  • and before he can process how to do it, richie just blurts out
  • ‘it’s because you’re my spaghetti and i love you’
  • and THAT’S when Eddie’s tears waterfall down his face
  • and he pulls richie by the side of his shirt that’s still around his neck and kisses him
  • ‘I love you too, Trashmouth. But please let me clean that now’
  • ‘It WAS cleaned Eds. But if it makes you happy’
  • and then richie stays the night at eddie’s and just texts the tattooist a thumbs up
  • needless to say he’s back in there next month, eddie in tow, to get some more tattoos
  • (eddie gets his tongue pierced)
seduce ; jeon jungkook

genre: some dirty stuff in there, so a lil smut ft my badass humour 

summary: you’re forced to seduce jungkook, who your spy team really despises and who you’re enemies with, but you think you feel different towards him. || spy, playboy jungkook lmfao

ALSO: those in your spy team are jimin, taehyung, areum, you and jiyeon. in jungkook’s team are namjoon, him, hoseok, eunbi and naeyoung.

jjang = cheers! 

your spy team were the opponents of jungkook’s team, you’ve been trying to beat each other at missions for almost two years, and the bickering between the calls of saying, “we’re ahead first. watch out.” never got old. your team were also really sarcastic and it was pretty funny to watch when others wouldn’t answer the sarcastic saying.

“you want me to seduce that jungkook?!” you spat out the cold beer from your mouth. “no no, guys, i love you and all that, but i can’t seduce him- he has a fucking girlfriend, for crying out loud!”

“of course, what other jungkook would there be?” jiyeon said sarcastically. 

“kim jungkook. park jungkook, i dunno.” you said.

“y/n, that’s your only choice.” jimin spoke, who was in your spy team gang sorta thing. “c’mon.”

“why me?” you ask.

“because you know jungkook,” areum said as she placed her laptop in front of her, “you’re like.. the only person out of us five who talked to him before.”

“i talked to him because i was a foolish bitch,” you said, “what is it that we need?”

“kim namjoon, who’s in jungkook’s team, stole our fucking monitor.” areum groaned, “the monitor we use to track down the situations we needed to save, since they didn’t have it. thought they were the rich assholes out of us.”

“why didn’t we just get him arrested,” you roll your eyes, “at least i won’t get to fucking seduce jeon jungkook. what if he was going to propose to eunbi?”

“first, screw eunbi for a second, would we?” taehyung said, “you need to do it, please. for us. jungkook’s gotten more serious about defending themselves because of us. we need to get the fake id we use to get in the club in seoul, and he has it. you’re our only hope.”

“okay.. fine.” you sigh, placing the bottle of beer on the glass table and falling back onto the black, leather loveseat. 


your phone began to go off and you chuckled bitterly at the ringer.

“who’s that?” jiyeon asked.

“it’s jungkook.” immediately, taehyung, jimin and areum surrounded you.

“hello?” you say and put him on speaker.

“hi cutie,” jungkook called and you rolled your eyes. taehyung cringed from beside.

“thought you had a girlfriend,” you chuckled and areum covered her mouth. “what do you want, jeon?”

“good luck on the mission, i wanted to say.” you can sense the smirk in his voice. “there’s an extra one signed up for both of our teams.”

“what is it?”

“there’s this hidden watch at the seoul casino near downtown,” jungkook said, “we have to deliver it to our managers. it’s first served. wish you luck.”

“wish you luck my ass.” you rolled your eyes, “we can handle three missions easily, as we have trained for three years. unlike your.. rookie team. only for a year.”

“we were called professionals, excuse me.” jungkook said, “maybe i’ll see you at the casino, cutie.”

“don’t call me that.” you growled. you hung up and clenched your jaw.

“y/n.. uh, breakfast is done.” jimin smiled innocently at you.

you take a deep breath, “we’re going to focus on the missions.”


areum, the leader of cameras and monitors, types in into her laptop.

“looks like jungkook and his gang aren’t at home..” areum said as you stare out of the house they stayed in. “i’m looking at every single camera and none of them are showing. let me check where they are.”

“don’t see their cars.” jimin said, “i think we’re able to get the monitors and the fake id.”

you nod as you and jimin put in the ear piece, it wasn’t convenient at the moment but you never know if they have bodyguards around the house. you and jimin get out of the black van and stare at it.

“can you both hear me?” taehyung said, who was in charge of the ear pieces. you and jimin were always the ones who got out of the van and ended up doing the mission, while jiyeon kept the codes, even if they were such a secret.

“yep,” you and jimin said at the same time. you gripped jimin’s hand for support and he gave you a faint smile. you both snuck from the back.

“okay,” taehyung said, “jiyeon said the code is 7569.”

you punch the code in and the door opened, revealing the clean, shiny inside of the house. it was too quiet, you were surprised they didn’t have maids and kept this clean.

“they are such rich assholes,” jimin laughed, “like.. rich..”

“whatever,” you sigh, “tae, put areum on hold.”

“what do you need?” areum asked.

“where’s the id and the monitors?”

“they’re in jungkook’s office. obviously i don’t know what draw it might be so you have to look.”

“god.. where is his office? this place is a fucking maze..” jimin mutters.

“oh, go to the left staircase and it’s the third door.” areum said, “are you settled?”

“we found it.” jimin said. was jungkook’s office really an office? in your thoughts, it looked like a luxury room. a huge laptop, a huge smart tv, a couch, a desk, maybe it was secretly.

you and jimin began to look at the draws, “and jungkook said it was hard to find.”

“you found it?” you looked at jimin as he held the monitor and id. he nodded, proudly. “okay, let’s get out of here.”

he grabbed your hand as you swiftly got yourselves out of the house.

“y/n?” you hear his voice. you gulped and you turned around.

“hey,” jungkook smirked. “you thought i wasn’t gone? well, i was here waiting for you.”

“playboy,” you mutter. 

“y/n, do something.” jiyeon said.

“it’s nice to see you too, jungkook.” you fake smile, rubbing your left arm.

“nice to see you with your.. boyfriend?” he pointed at jimin. “i thought you could do better.”

“i feel bad for your girlfriend, eunbi.. man, it must suck that her boyfriend’s sweet-talking with another girl.” jimin said.

jungkook changed the topic, “so, you found the id and monitors, huh?”

“we’re leaving.” you turned around and jimin followed.

you and jimin began to walk to the car.

“that went.. smoother..” jiyeon said as taehyung began to drive, “you’re not affected by jungkook’s words, right?”

“he’s just a fuckboy.” you said, “his attitude suits his looks for all i care.”

you sipped your water bottle. “now, we have to prepare for the real mission.”


placing your gold earrings, you sighed as you looked at yourself in the mirror. you were wearing a red skater dress with a v cut on the back, and you prayed that the shoulders won’t fall off. you paired it with white heels you borrowed from areum, and you placed your ear piece in since all of you were taking part to find the watch.

“look at you, grown up.” areum smirked, “or.. is it to seduce jungkook?”

“none,” you said, “are the cameras all set?”

“yup, jiyeon’s got the tracking monitor working. jungkook’s gang are heading to the casino.” areum placed her phone in her bag.

“are you all ready?” taehyung asked as he adjusted his hair at the corridor mirror. jimin came after him, shoving his phone in his pocket.

“yep,” you, areum and jiyeon said.

“good luck.” areum looked at you and jimin.

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