germane child

My poor murder child needs a break cause clearly the writers and the world are out to get him 😭😡

Me: *reads description for ep 11 about one of them needing saving*

Me: …. *squints*

Me: It’s gonna be fucking Wolfgang isn’t it

Me: CAUSE IT’S ALWAYS FUCKING WOLFGANG THAT THESE THINGS HAPPEN TO

Me: *watches episode to see that it is in fact Wolfgang because of fucking course*

Me: *wailing* why can’t they just leave my smol German son alone!?!

Me: *wails louder* he was finally gonna meet up with the love of his life!!!!

Me: *seeing at the end of the episode, my son’s whereabouts are still unknown*

Me: *realises I have to wait until probably 2019 to find out what happened*

Me: *RIOTS*

BTS MASTERLIST

REACTION

To you asking them to have sex ❤ ❤ 

See you crying after a fight ❤ ❤

To thisisnoteuropeanstyle.tumblr.com

To you taking them to meet your family in a foreign country ❤

When their child ask them questions about the sex education class they had at school ❤ ❤

When they find a positive pregnacy test in your bag ❤

To their gf/wife waiting with their child at the airport, and they see someone say racist comments because you speak german/the child is blonde/ mixed raced

To they girlfriend falling to sleep in their arms ❤

To their gf listening to metal

To you getting a tattoo

When they like a girl that is tsundere

To you wearing their boxers ❤ ❤

To you calling them “oppa” for the first time ❤ ❤

When they have a crush on you but you’re best friend with another member, who also like you

When they there idol gf perform on stage

When you surprise them at home with a puppy 

To finding another member dead because killed themsevels when they came home from the practice

Who is most or least likely to have a foreign girlfriend

When they find out the “girls” they like is actually a trans boy

To see you for the first time and they want to talk to you 

To them realising they love you

When they idol gf suddently faints on stage

To seeing you in a cute swimsuit ❤ 

When you being scared of needles and having to get a shot

To you hitting him ❤  

To walking in on their girlfriend naked ❤ ❤  

To they liking a guy but being too scared to act out on it due to what the other members would think of their “gay” relationship

To getting a call which says that their gf is in the hospital bc she tried to commit suicide

To you being a celebrity guest at the Mama Awards and you’re from the west (UK,USA, etc…) and they have a crush on you ❤ ❤  

To you getting in an argument or maybe even a fight because the other girl was messing with you and trying to get close to your s/o

How they would act when they found out they love you ❤

To them getting a call that you got admitted to the hospital

To you suddenly being friendly and texting another group guy

To being friendzoned

Seeing you (idol/gf) dancing in the practive room

Sex Positions (+19)

To their idol girlfriend doing a sexy dance with another idol

To another member getting their little sister pregnant

If another idol confessed to you and he happened to see him almost kissing you ❤ ❤

f them making you cry and they have to fix it ❤

Where they meet your parents

Seeing you with makeup and in a dress for the first time and the dress is scandalous

Where you, their s/o, wake up for a nightmare or something and you become kinda clingy until you can go back to sleep

To their girl friend being in a kpop group but she’s the only girl member and the rest are boys

To finding out that their girlfriends are pregnant but they just had a really bad fight ❤

Where you try to kiss them but you are too short ❤ ❤

To when you tell them that you want to write a book  

To them seeing you pick at your arm(like a scab or something) because you are stressed

Having a goth/emo girlfriend

Finding out that you’re pregnant ❤

When their gf don’t use/wear girly things (dresses,makeup,heels,etc.) and is more tomboyish

To their gf/bf wanting to become a kpop idol but their parents keep going against it no matter how many times they ask and sing to them 

To you being somali

Where they find out that their GF is a kickboxer and has lots of muscles

Where they try to help you in learning how to drive

From that your big sister gonna marry but you look better than her

When you’re a foreigner and you are from Europe and you can’t speak Korean or Chinese ❤

To their new girl member ❤

When seeing another guy giving his GF his number ❤ ❤

When their gf gets really jealous seeing them with another girl

When you ask them to go bra shopping with you

When he and his gf argue, he makes a sudden hand gesture and then she holding her hands out of reflex protectively in front of her face

On your wedding day ❤

To their gf having really bad period cramps to the point where he ends up taking her to a hospital

Of them finding a kitten on the streets

Confess to you

How long they will date their girlfriend before to ask for marry her

Where you are pregnant and you hid it from them for a long time because you were not dating. You were friends with benefits and you stopped the relationship when you found out about your pregnancy

To you using a ton of the shampoo and conditioner for your long hair

To accidentally waking up in the same bed with you

To you having a slight lisp

You are friends, that like each other, and you go shopping together but your dress got stuck and you ask them to come and take it off you

Finding out that their girlfriend that they’ve had since high school is pregnan (Suga and Jungkook)

Reject your confession

When their gf has sciatic back pain

To them finding a picture of themselves as your laptop desktop but you two are not dating yet

To them seeing you dancing one of their songs using only one of their t-shirts [First Version] ❤ - [Second Version]

What would they plan/do to surprise their gf on their first birthday together?

To you being a sarcastic asshole in a funny way

When they’re resting after a dance practice and you act as a stripper and do a lap dance for them, then walk away as if nothing happened, but later they find out it was a dare from the rest of BTS bc they knew of their crush ❤

Where their boyfriends propose to them

To finding out that you (new friend or gf) are a very popular youtuber that does a lot of dance covers/videos and is also a good singer [First Version] ❤ - [Second Version]

When you’re at the beach and the lace of your bikini top gets undone and you ask them to tie it back for you ❤

Where you take it to yourself to initiate sexy time by sitting on their lap and while pretending to be innocent you start moving your hips against them

Liking a taller girl (not taller than they)

If they see their gf suddenly just walking up to protect a woman who is being abused by her husband/bf and then the man got really mad at her.

Of liking you but you don’t know who they are

To you acting drunk but is actually very tired

To their gf cooking them Pão de Queijo

To you cursing them out in patois

Where they meet your Hispanic parents who speak quickly in Spanish and they don’t understand what they are saying

To you (gf) doing lap dance for them ❤

Age difference BTS would be willing to have in a relationship

To a cuddly s/o

When s/o sings the songs from Phantom Of The Opera with their pikachu oneesie while having a really bad cold

To pepero game with crush

To their s/o showing them their cat

To you wanting to take them to Trinidad to go to Bacchanal (Caribbean festival of dance)

To a female S/o with big boobies ❤

To seeing their crush getting slapped/hurt by their current bf ❤

To you always having your hair in braids but then when you loose them out your hair is a giant Afro

When their gf is very shy ❤

To you trying to get him to reveal what the short films/confusing music videos mean

To his wife pregnant with twins (Jungkook)

To waking up with their s/o’s arms around them and super close ❤ ❤

What kind of kissers and cuddlers they are ❤ ❤

When you exchange glances at a coffee shop while you work on your computer from another table and you look away because you panicked

To you surprising them with their favorite lingerie 

OUTFIT

For a date ❤ ❤

Proposal date

Casual spring school outing

First Date

I am really bad at my native language. And I think fandom had a big part in that.

When I discovered fandom as a teen, I found it on German sites, in a language I easily understood. But there was limited content and people were talking about the big things beyond, the LJ communities, scanlation groups, fanfiction archives and deviantArt to name a few.

I taught myself English through a mix of school lessons and reading fanfics in one tab, a dictionary next to me and looking up words. I was fascinated by the fannish world I found online, and that world? Spoke English.

It didn’t stop at fanwork. I stopped reading German books. I stopped watching German TV or dubs. I stuck to English media because then I could jump right into the English fandom. I talked to fans globally and while we weren’t all English speakers by birth… We somehow all spoke English when we chatted. It was just the thing you do.

Somewhere along the way, my brain got used to this. I got into the habit of speaking English, thinking English. When I wrote my final thesis in German and had my sister proofread, she frowned at me. “These sentences use English grammar. They don’t make sense in German.” I had to rewrite about a third of my sentences because my brain couldn’t come up with German syntax anymore.

Last week, while chatting with coworkers I mentioned the bad luck I had with my kitchen. A coworker laughed. I hadn’t even realised that instead of Pech (German word for bad luck) I had used the literal translation “schlechtes Glück”. And it keeps happening. If I don’t pay attention, I answer in a jumble of English and German at work. My coworkers tease me about it a lot.

Sadly, this doesn’t mean my English is any better. I am scrambling for words there too and not making sense. It is like my brain can’t decide what it wants to do.

I don’t feel emotionally connected to my native language. But it feels weird, to stumble over your own words. It is like loosing your footing on a street you know by heart.

Disconcerting, but you catch yourself. Try again.

Christiane F. - Wir Kinder vom Bahnhof Zoo | 1981 | Uli Edel | West Germany

I, I will be king
A
nd you, you will be queen

“Heroes” David Bowie

korealchemist  asked:

Hello and how are you doing? Could you do baby headcannons for Jack, Genji, Roadhog, or Reinhardt? Or if there s/o was pregnant? Any of them are fine, your pick! The sweeter the better please and thank you! (If it's too much, I understand! I'm sorry but I hope you have a good day!)

It’s just four people it’s fine, I’m just happy to write!

JACK
•Almost passes out when you tell him.
•He always dreamed of having a family.
•He’ll do anything you need him to.
•It’s best for both of you if you send him to the store for you, he’s just really protective.
•Always by your side no matter what.
•Nearly passed out when you went into labor.
•Best dad ever though.
•Three words- Family cuddle sessions.


GENJI
•Genji didn’t know it was possible so he’s floored when it happens.
•He’s still really happy.
•Set on the baby being healthy so you get to deal with him “helping” .
•Meditation is a must for you he want your pregnancy to be calm and nice.
•Asks Zenyatta to be the godfather. Zen doesn’t understand but says yes.
•Your kid looks radical, he puts the child in the weirdest outfits. (But you have to admit they do look cute)
•Shows baby off every and to everyone.
•If you’re gone you get tons of pictures of Genji and baby together.

ROADHOG
•This man is a big softie.
•He will take care of you to the end.
•Massages, check. Medication, check. It’s 3 A.m. and you want ice cream, he’s already on it.
•Will read your belly poetry really soft stuff though.
•Belly kisses are a must!
•Always has a hand on you or has to be touching you in some way just to make sure you and the baby don’t get hurt.
•When he first holds your child he cries he’s so scared he’ll hurt the baby.
•But once the child smiles at him, his doubts are gone.


REINHARDT
•Loves kids so when you tell him he cries and takes you in his arms only letting do when you ask.
•All the clothes he buys for the child have German sayings that you’re pretty sure are really sweet.
•Plays your belly music really stupid music.
•All I can say is big man little baby.
•Baby sling, all the way. This man will carry the baby while doing anything.
•Your child love holding onto his hand it’s adorable.
•You also find them napping on the couch together.
•Teaches the child German, and how to fight but he’s extra careful he doesn’t want them to get hurt.

(Also one from my mom)
(•Reinhardt teaches the child how to play baseball, because of his mean swing.)

~Nox

ID #38547

Name: Jesse
Age: 23
Country: USA

The first pen pal I ever had I was 19 years old and it changed my life forever. Her and I lost touch over a most unfortunate event - that led me to a more inward state of my life. I’m here to reclaim my love for writing and friendship. About me, I moved from Arkansas to pursue my dreams and now am my own boss and I employ the most loyal and fierce squad that walks that earth and we grow the highest quality medicine the earth can provide, Cannabis. I spend my nights lighting bonfires and fishing with the occasional consumption of drugs and it’s many similar companions. Before any play though, I’m taking care of my 10 month old, Anakin. He is my light and the reason for my success. I’m in therapy to enlist the help of someone else to put order to the chaos in my head. Which is mostly just caused by the fact that I am unhappy in my love life. This year, that’s going to change though! I’m very open minded, and a good listener. I remember most things about people. I’m very friendly and certainly a hopeless romantic. - Auch, Ich spreche und schreibe auf deutsch.

Preferences: 18+, a PNW'er would be cool but otherwise is fine