If something went wrong, he had
a plan to make it right.
If he needed to celebrate,
he knew how,
and he knew where to get it.
When he needed to escape, for an hour,
for a night,
he knew how to get there.
If he needed more time to travel,
there was always that option.
He had plans and over decades
produced enough of a schedule to
work around whatever was disruptive
to himself and his own conscience.
Once, he told a friend about his
solution, while he was, in fact, on
vacation, as he was in the midst of
his solution, and the reaction he
received was unexpected.
That is to say, before he revealed his
plans he had never questioned or
second-guessed his process as being
extraordinary, strange, or harmful.
You have to slow down,
You have to stop,
Have you got any idea
How this could
Your family? Me? Your friends - not
to mention your job, the people who rely
She called it a crutch,
that he was lucky to be alive
after all of his plans
spilled from last decade
into this last one.
It’s not humanly possible to survive
when you schedule
your life this way, she said.
He was on vacation, on a strict
timetable of intricate balance. The
transfer was coming soon,
and he could not be delayed - not
by beauty or malice,
guilt or tension.
If anything was delayed,
the consequences would ultimately be
but he did not want
to consider the options
of never having
available at all
of the day.
This was his right, it seemed,
and it was his alone
to devour how he saw.