genuinely dimly lit

I was drunk for the 7th day in a row snowed in in a cabin .

I desperately wanted pizza but it was too late for delivery and we were running low on food, so I microwaved American cheese on saltines and put ketchup on for “flavor.”

I also proceeded to drop one on myself and my shirt is still stained. 

The rugged determination of a drunk American frontierswoman to enjoy pizza, against all odds.

Add a wisecracking raccoon, and the obligatory evil British person, and you’ve got a blockbuster hit right there.

Jack, a man out of time and out of Oven Pride, submits his singular take on the British classic ‘Toad in the hole’.

Coming up with a dish that looks more like frog in a blender Jack continues to push the limits of what can be done with sausage in batter. He adds an exciting blend of carcinogens with his patented burnt perimeter technique.

Jack informs me that he was only following instructions when he birthed this pork pudding mishap, an excuse which didn’t work at Nuremberg and won’t work here either I’m afraid Jack.

The pinnacle of food photography, a picture so intimately lit that it’s nearly impossible to discern what is on the plate.

I think I can spot a rogue halved lemon and what could well be cauliflower. The others are mysteries, lost to the sands of time. 

This mysterious plate is overflowing with food. The person who took this desperate snapshot must have been half-starved, barely finding the time or strength to chronicle their meal before pushing the very limits of their stomach wall with portions fit for a ravenous lumberjack.


The whole piece is rounded off with some sinister light effects which lend a cold and oppressive quality to the composition.

Notice how the cutlery has been stabbed into the food heap with measured and controlled violence, perhaps signifying something about western society and the distorted relationship  its inhabitants have developed with the very food they consume?

A raw and uncompromisingly brutal new talent in food photography.