I just want lesbians to know that it’s hard being a trans man. I spent the majority of my life believing I was a super butch lesbian because I was raised in a conservative family that never knew shit about being transgender. I made relationships with lots of lesbians and I felt like I was really apart of a strong wlw community. And then I came out as trans and I was completely cut off. Nobody from before wanted anything to do with me. It’s hard that I had such a supportive group that I felt safe in, and now I have nothing because I identify as a different member of the lgbtq+ and it hurts. I feel like lesbians feel like we’ve betrayed who we were. Gay men don’t take us seriously because we’re not “real” men so we’re not good enough. And everyone just resents us. There’s so much advertising for accepting bisexuality and being a trans woman, but everyone seems to forget that trans men exist and they come in all shapes and sizes and they face discrimination too.

the coffee shop au
  • mercy graduated a few months ago
  • pharah’s in her final year and on her second sketchbook
  • her professor requires two sketchbooks filled with artwork
  • and cause the prof’s cool she doesn’t require completion of pieces
  • just as long as you can come up with a poetic reason why it’s not finished
  • pharmercy move in together
  • it’s a little apartment in greenwich, new york
  • one day, mercy comes rushing in through the door
  • pharah’s curled up on the couch with a sketchbook and fuzzy socks
  • “fareeha,” mercy says excitedly, and pharah blinks, looking up.
  • “angela, habibti. wha-”
  • “you know that job i applied for a few months back? a professor at stanford?”
  • “yes, i-”
  • “i got it.”
  • pharah breaks out in a huge grin, jumps up, and picks mercy up, spinning her around
  • both of them are squealing and it’s so cute
  • and then tracer comes sauntering in with like a full-on mattress and a sleeping bag
  • “tracer. what.”
  • “i tried to top widow. don’t ask.”
  • “ah.”
  • “I CAN’T BELIEVE IT”
  • “I DO BECAUSE YOU’RE FANTASTIC AND I BELIEVE IN YOU AND I LOVE YOU”
  • “MARRY ME AND MOVE TO CALIFORNIA WITH ME”


  • …”what?”
  • oh shit oh shit oh shit mercy that was in no way smooth at all
  • tracer sees the look on her face and very quickly backs out of the apartment
  • “are you joking?”
  • “no, i’m not. fareeha, listen. i want to spend the rest of my life with you. i just want you to be happy. i’ve never wanted that so much before. fareeha-”
  • “um- i really have to- just remembered- i have to go.”
  • she practically sprints out
  • tracer’s waiting outside
  • she grabs onto pharah’s arm like an obstinate barnacle
  • “did you say yes?”
  • “um, i…”
  • “oh my god. you blew her off.”
  • “in my defense-”
  • “you’re an idiot. i’ve seen your sketches, pharah.”
  • “wha- but i never- did you-”
  • “doesn’t matter. what does matter is that i know you. you pour every bit of your soul into your art, phar.”
  • “but i don’t know if we’re ready for this.”
  • “do you?”
  • pharah looks at her. “i think i would, tracer. i’m half of the we.”
  • “don’t speak for angela. if you’re not ready, then i get that. but if you don’t think the two of you are ready, then maybe you should ask what she feels.”
  • “she blurted it out in the heat of the moment, lena. she didn’t mean it.”
  • “and how do you know that?”
  • “well, i don’t. but, i mean-”
  • “is angela the person you want to love for the rest of your life?”
  • “yes.” pharah says instantaneously. “but we’re not-”
  • “hey, dumbass. i’m just going to ask you one question. don’t answer me now. think about it. okay. if angela’s ready for that commitment, then is it you being unready or your fear of being unready that’s holding you back? just think about that. see you round, phar.”
  • one day later
  • mercy’s almost literally dying
  • she’s fairly certain this is a legitimate medical disease.
  • “she hates me now”
  • “stop whining”
  • not for the first time, she wonders why she enlisted widow to talk to about this
  • widow shovels more popcorn into her mouth and changes the channel
  • “but i just sort of threw it at her. and then she left. i just- oh my god i’m a terrible person.”
  • “is it possible to mute a human being?”
  • “i’m trying to angst here.”
  • widow sighs. “if she loves you, she’ll be back. eventually.”
  • “i can’t stand it anymore, amelie. i don’t think it’s-”
  • “oh look, there she is.”
  • angela freezes
  • widow gets up, carelessly tossing her popcorn all over the carpet, and brushes by pharah.
  • pharah’s panting, like she’s just sprinted a mile
  • “fareeha, it was unfair of-”
  • “you really want to be married to me.”
  • mercy blinks, taken aback.
  • “yes. more than anything else in the world.”
  • “and you want me to move to california with you.”
  • “of course.”
  • “you’re sure?”
  • “i have never been surer, fareeha.”
  • “then yes.”
  • angela freezes because this is probably the gayest (in both senses of the word) she’s ever been in her whole life.
  • “really?”
  • they’re both sniffling a little
  • “yes, a hundred times over.”
  • mercy’s too overcome to do anything but kiss her
  • when they separate, pharah rests her forehead against mercy’s
  • “i’m going to need a sizable diamond, though.”
  • mercy kisses her again.
  • “we’re gonna be okay,” she says, then reconsiders. “actually, fuck that. we’re going to be better than okay. we’re going to be great. we’re going to be fabulous. we’re going to be the shit.”
  • pharah laughs. “yeah?”
  • “yeah.”
  • they’re in love.