gator attack

anonymous asked:

"I fucking punched a gator once I’ve thrown cottonmouths away from me I’ve fucking been shot in the woods" please god, elaborate

okay so.. uh.. I’m from texas but most of my fam still lives in louisiana bayou. I had a crazy ass uncle who fucking threw firecrackers at me and showed me what to do if a gator attacks u. if u dont have a gun u have to slam down on the soft spot on its head- I’ve only had to do it once lmao.. and uh.. cottonmouths are v poisonous snakes that swim. and they live in the lake near austin where I live. and it was gonna bite me so I? picked it up and threw it not much to tell. When I was 13 I got lost in the woods a guy thought I was a deer and shot me. then he tried to shoot me again to finish the job cause like a MORON I DIDNT?? SCREAM WHEN I GOT SHOT I STAYED QUIET AND FELL TO THE GROUND TO TRY AND HIDE

lmao I’ve done.. a lot more crazy ass shit my life is fucked

Bad Things that Happened in 2016: Donald Trump elected, Brexit, Orlando Shooting, Bastille Day Terror Attack, Brussels Bombing, Gator attack, Dallas Police Shooting, Zika outbreak, David Bowie died, Prince died, Alan Rickman died, Gene Wilder died, Muhammad Ali died, Christina Grimmie died, Harambe died, Hurricane Matthew, and general concern over terrorism and the state of the world. 

Good Things that Happened in 2016: Yuri!!! on Ice Episode 7