gastroenterological

hlwily series extra: ‘for all that blooms is beautiful’

Note: It can be assumed that both Harry and Rosie sign and speak verbally in tandem, unless the story otherwise indicates.

word count: 3.7k

warning: for discussion of bullying, deaf/hoh struggles/upset, etc.  


Rosie, age 6

Harry turned into the school’s parking lot and fit himself into a space near the entrance. Pushing the gear shift upward, he undoes his seatbelt and sits back, switching off the car’s radio. Looking out over the parking lot and across the courtyard to the front entrance, he watched clusters of parents collecting their children, who run towards them with delight, book bags swinging on their shoulders. Others are chattering excitedly to one another as they wait for their way home.  Some of the teachers are out front, making sure everyone gets where they need to go.  

It’s early autumn, the start of a new school year and everyone is wrapped up in thick cardigans and winter coats, bearing the school’s crest. The clouds are thick overhead, washing the light that coasts down from them, overcast. It heightens the muted colors of the leaves on the trees that surround the school’s front walls.

Running a hand over his face, he sat back and tried to squash the anxious feeling twisting around in his belly and up to his chest. Playing the phone call from her teacher over and over again in his mind until it rang in his ears.

There was an incident with a couple of the other children in class. She wasn’t hurt, but she’s very upset. I think it may be best if we speak in person at the end of the school day.

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The TOP 5 reasons you should be happy about getting a colonoscopy

(fun version)

1. You’re practically getting a colonic/cleanse/detox covered by your insurance while some people pay $60+ for it! You’ll feel so light and detoxified after it you won’t even believe it.
And remember: For free.

2. You’re one of the privileged people having a chance of saying “hallo!” to your intestines or to look at some nice photographs of your insides after you wake up. (Or discuss all the things from “eye to gut” you always wanted to tell them! Like: “Hey there Colon, there’s a thing I always wanted to tell you: Stop being an asshole!”)

3. In case you’re going to get anaesthesia: You can sleep while other people have to work without feeling bad about it! Truly guiltless.

4. You’ll be the NUMBER ONE at every birthday party of your older family members (grandparents, aunt, uncle, parents…) because you know all the secrets about colonoscopies and know all the prep hacks while they’re 50+ years old and have no idea…

5. You can drink as much clear fluids as you want. No limit. Drink all the lemonade, Gatorade, vegetable broth, tea and water you always wanted to drink. Let’s say it again: UNLIMITED! When the prep starts the limit will come to an end.

The Signs as Branches of Medicine

Aries: Neurology, Ophthalmology

Taurus: Endocrinology, Otorhinolaryngology (ENT)

Gemini: Pediatrics, Pulmonology

Cancer: Oncology, Obstetrics

Leo: Cardiology, General practice

Virgo: Gastroenterology, Hepatology

Libra: Nephrology, Dermatology

Scorpio: Gynecology, Pathology

Sagittarius: Plastic, Geriatrics

Capricorn: Orthopedics, Dentistry

Aquarius: Hematology, Emergency medicine

Pisces: Alternative medicine, Psychiatry

(I know there are more but these are the ones that popped in my head)

One liner on the specialties thus far

I have been really enjoying my off-service rotations so far. It’s been keeping me busy, but time has flown and I only have 3 more rotations until I go on service.

ICU: wean down vent settings.  

Peds cardio: just ECHO everyone. Musical/harsh/high-pitched murmurs are all bullshit. Your ears lie. ECHO does not. 

Gen surg: don’t fuck with the pancreas. 

Gastroenterology: The liver is a very forgiving organ. Until it is not. 

Neurosurgery: just CT everyone. Neuro exams lie. CT does not. 

Pediatrics: play the phone-tag between all the sub-specialties (admit your own f*ing patients, GI/immunology/respirology)

General Internal Medicine: plan? incentive spirometry and PT/OT. 

Peds Orthopedics: go hide in the library and avoid the 12 hour ORs. 


…I may or may not be in the library, writing this post, avoiding the above 12 hour ORs. 

Mio padre sta male. Maddai? Sì, lo so, lo dico spesso, quasi sempre. Ma oggi non voglio parlare propriamente di lui né di me. Voglio parlare della sua malattia. Mio padre sta male da tanto tempo: nel 2007 è stato operato di tumore alla prostata, nel 2010 di tumore al colon, nel 2013 sono uscite le metastasi e da quel giorno fa ininterrottamente cicli di chemioterapia (ha smesso solo nell’ultimo mese, ma poco cambia ai fini del discorso). Tutto ciò per dire che di medici ne abbiamo visti davvero tanti: oncologi, chirurghi, nefrologi, endocrinologi, gastroenterologi (non sono sicura si scriva così) perché poi la chemio è andata a danneggiare tanti parti del suo corpo che poco avevano a vedere con il tumore. 

Comunque dicevo. Di medici ne abbiamo visti tanti, di tecnici anche, di infermieri non ve lo sto manco a dire e abbiamo incontrato tanta gente stronza. Ma stronza davvero eh. Però è più facile ricordarsi del medico (dico medico ma intendo tutto il personale che ha a che fare con i malati) stronzo rispetto a quello che stronzo non è stato. Perché è più facile, perché ci ferisce (giustamente), perché ci chiediamo come faccia ad essere stronza una persona che deve avere a che fare con delle persone ‘deboli’ (tralasciando il fatto che il medico è umano e quindi può anche avere il giorno che gli rode il culo per i cazzi suoi anche se noi non glielo perdoniamo ovviamente). Spesso le parole e i gesti di queste persone ci hanno fatto stare male non solo emotivamente, ma ci hanno procurato (forse, non posso esserne certa) dei danni evitabili, però mi ricordo anche della cioccolata che le infermiere davano a papà durante la chemio, mi ricordo l’oncologa che ci ha telefonato di sabato sera perché avevamo bisogno del suo aiuto, mi ricordo la gentilezza della maggioranza (sì la MAGGIORANZA) delle persone con cui abbiamo avuto a che fare, le parole dell’infermiera che ci tranquillizzava, le mail a cui l’oncologo rispondeva anche la sera tardi anche se mio padre non era più suo paziente. Oh poi saremo stati fortunati (fortunati, LOL) però io ci penso spesso che vedere solo il marcio non rende giustizia a chi marcio non è e che poi tutto sommato è la stragrande maggioranza.

(sentivo di doverlo dire perché in questo periodo in cui si sentono tutti medici e i medici - quelli veri - vengono attaccati sempre e comunque, mi sembrava giusto dire che mio padre è ancora vivo grazie alla scienza, ai medici e alle medicine e questo è un fatto, le altre sono cazzate) 

What it's like to have a colonoscopy

For many, the concept of a colonoscopy is hilariously degrading. My husband’s best friend had one once before we knew each other, and they loved to joke about the personally violating anal probe. I don’t even know where to start with them on that, but I’d bet you could ask Joe now about colonoscopies and his opinion would be a little bit less humorous. You know, I’m inclined to laugh about it, but not in a South Park-aliens-anal-probe kind of way. I’ll put the rest of this blog, including the results and “what this means” under the link below. 

My intention is to make others feel comfortable with the concept of a colonoscopy. I’ve had four to date, and they want people with my age and condition to have one every year. If anyone comes across this on Tumblr, feel free to send me a message with questions.

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anonymous asked:

I have a character who worked in trauma surgery but due to physical injury (loss of fine motor control and little endurance for standing), he can’t do it any more. If he wanted to change specialties to something like family medicine it sounds like he would need more training. If he wanted to remain in the medical field, are there less physical jobs he would be qualified for?

Hey nonny! Your character has some options…

He could move up: become a residency director, a chief of department, a figurehead for getting donations… There are lots of administrative roles that he could take on, especially if he’s well-liked by management and has wanted to go that direction anyway.

He could probably move to the ER (pretty easy transition), though he may have to ask his students or fellow attendings to perform procedures for him (depending on his motor control).

He could also move to a post-surgical recovery floor/wing/ward/unit, where he would be looking at postoperative patients.

Then there are some other specialties that would work well, but he would have to retrain for….

  • Family Practice
  • Neurology
  • Radiology
  • Cardiology
  • Dermatology
  • Gastroenterology
  • Psychiatry

He could also transition to a role of speaking and teaching around the country rather than practicing. He could write textbooks, give lectures, teach at a medical school. He could organize conferences.

Or he could leave medicine entirely, if that was his wish.

So I hope I’ve given you some options. Best of luck with your story and your character! 

xoxo, Aunt Scripty

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Sometimes I imagine my intestine is a bit stupid:
  • Intestine (after a meal): "Oh what's that? Food?!? I don't know what to do? Really I've no idea of working with it. I think I can't handle it. I'll just let it pass and see what happens. Yeah, that's the best idea."
An IBD Partner

Should be able to:

Carry me to and from the bathroom
Bring me my meds
Make me tea
Hold me until I feel well enough to sleep
Give me my injections
Hold my hand for every shot, blood draw, transfusion, and IV

Drive me to the ER Sleep with me in the hospital Make me midnight snacks Stay up with me Advocate for me Remember subtle things that I forget and tell my doctor Come with me to my appointments Not be discouraged Stay by my side Think I’m perfect just the way I am.

15./16.03.2017

Good news! Passed pulmonology today! 4,5/5 despite some obstacles - it’s really great. 👏🏻😍
And tomorrow we’re starting another rotation - gastroenterology. I just prepared some materials and notebooks for whole day (I also have a faculty class in the afternoon). 📚

TSK: Hiccups x 1 year

Saw a 10 year old kid today. Young fella has seen multiple doctors for “hiccups” (Urgent Care, Pediatrician, ER), has been prescribed antacids and antihistamines, has been referred to GI (no appointment for another 4 months) Mom and dad are frustrated: “It’s NOT hiccups, we keep trying to explain, his tummy muscles jerk and a sound come out of his mouth and his jaw flops opened and closed, but it’s just NOT hiccups.”

And I agreed with them. The kid (rather obviously) has a motor/vocal tic disorder, possibly Tourette’s (if the workup through neurology and psychiatry doesn’t turn up any organic causes for his tics). But if I had agreed with the previous doctors’ notes, agreed in my head before entering the exam room, I would have interpreted his mannerisms and vocalizations as a (kinda-weird  and uncoordinated) hiccup.

Today, in my Urgent Care, the best thing I could do for this boy was to avoid automatically jumping to the same diagnosis everyone else has made. The only thing he and his parents needed (for now) was for someone to observe, keep the differential broad, ask questions from a different angle, think outside of the “box” created by his previous doctor visits.

I didn’t write him a prescription, I didn’t scope him or lab him or admit him. I just looked and listened and thought and recognized and recommended. And his mom left my Urgent Care so happy to have a name for it and a plan to pursue.


They left, and I started writing up his note with a trace of smug satisfaction… and I got the hiccups.