Your site is the first one I go to everyday because I can just not get enough of your fics! I await them all day! (They're so shiny, so chrome) I hope you keep writing them, so please do another--Max/Furiosa: my friend is trying to get with your friend and we end up on a double date. Thanks so much again!
Max literally never, ever thought he would be in a position to wingman for a seventy-nine-year-old woman.
Here he was.
His kindly old neighbor, Miss Giddy, had a huge crush on an elderly member of a lesbian biker gang, which was a sentence he never thought he’d say. But she was adorably shy about it and had begged Max to come with her to the dinner the woman, Keeper, was making.
“Won’t that be weird?” he asked, but Miss Giddy shook her head.
“She’s having a couple of her biker friends over,” she said. “Oh, please, Max? It’s hard for women like to me to meet people anymore!”
Max could definitely see how being a senior citizen lesbian with a walker might not open up a lot of dating pools. So he agreed, waving off her promises of raspberry and white chocolate scones as payment. Instead he drove her to Keeper’s house at six o’clock on Friday and helped her up the walkway. The door was opened by a woman in her late thirties, early forties, with hair cropped close to her head and a tanktop. She smiled. “Hi Miss Giddy,” she said, clearly recognizing the older woman. “Keeper’s in the kitchen, but come on in! Who’s your friend?”
“This is my neighbor, Max,” Miss Giddy said fondly. “He drove me here.” And then she did that thing that older women do and zeroed in on them. “Furiosa is a friend of Keeper’s,” she explained carefully to Max. “She’s a nice young lady.”
Max and Furiosa glanced at each other and instantly looked away. “Can I get you anything?” Furiosa asked as she helped Miss Giddy get settled in. “A drink?”
“Oh, just a little gin and tonic, dear, thank you,” Miss Giddy said.
Furiosa grinned. “Sure. Max? You strike me as a beer kinda guy.”
“Yes please,” he said, and Furiosa sauntered off to the kitchen.
“She’s bisexual, not lesbian,” Miss Giddy whispered. “And she’s single.”
Max grunted in acknowledgement.
Dinner turned out to be surprisingly pleasant. Keeper was delightfully sassy and had Max laughing more than he had in years. She had had a wild ride of a life and regaled them all with stories, most of which Furiosa already knew but seemed to enjoy anyway. As for the younger woman (who was single, Keeper brought up at least three times with significant looks in Max’s direction), she wasn’t nearly as open as Keeper, but she seemed as if she had had her fair share of adventures. Keeper was fun, but Max found himself wanting to hear more about Furiosa. He volunteered to help her clean up after dinner while the two older women sat in the living room and chatted.
“Keeper’s crazy about Miss Giddy,” Furiosa said.
“Well, the feeling’s mutual,” Max assured her.
Furiosa grinned. “They’re one hell of a pair–lesbian biker granny and tattooed geriatric librarian.“
“Wonder what the sex is like,” said Max, and they both laughed so hard they couldn’t catch their breath. When they finished cleaning up (thought not without a fair bit of flirting), they joined the two women in the living room. Max instantly knew something was up.
“Would you young people mind going to the store and getting some ice cream?” Keeper asked, pulling out two twenties. Apparently Keeper was not the only senior citizen who severely overestimated how much very simple things cost. “Giddy and I want to…chat.”
Max and Furiosa looked at each other and bolted for the door, waiting until they were in Max’s car before they burst out laughing.
“I’ve never been sexiled by old lesbians,” Max said, pulling out of the driveway.
“I grew up with them so you get used to it,” Furiosa said, still grinning. “We might…not want to get ice cream right away.”
“Okay,” he said. “What do you want to do?”
She gave him an appraising look. “Pull over here.”
He did, and was somehow not surprised when Furiosa climbed over and straddled his lap. “This might pass the time,” she breathed.
Max turned off the ignition.