Jake English fucking loves booty shorts, guys. Also: Dirk Strider.
I really could not believe it when I heard some people say Jake wears booty shorts because Dirk is a Predatory Gay and made him do so, but here we are. In any case, it took me forever to realize this, so it’s worth pointing out.
Jake uses his clothes to express his inclinations more than maybe any other one of the kids. Jake himself foreshadows his future inclination towards gear that shows off his ass…ets:
Frankly, I don’t think much else needs to be said there? There’s a canonical reason Jake dresses the way he dresses, and that reason is that Jake likes tomb raiders and sexy-looking action heroines, and he wants to be a sexy action hero and look sexy doing it. That’s really all there is to it.
…Or it would be, except that unlike Jake’s relationship with fighting, Jake actually experiences struggles and complications relating to looking sexy, and becomes insecure and vulnerable due to the way people treat him as a sex object.
It’s no surprise this happens. Jake has a list of sexual/romantic voyeurs and aggressors, and his discomfort and trauma in this area is an integral part of his character.
Early on, Obviously, there’s the AR, who’s lasciviousness is so well-documented I don’t think it’s worth repeating here.
Brobot is often accused of being a sexual aggressor as well. This belief is based on two quotes from the story:
This one, from AR. The thing is, AR is known for being pretty hyperbolic and overly sexual about pretty much all situations–kind of like a 13 year kid would be, you know?
What Jake himself says about the Brobot’s actions is much more indicative of the nature of the Brobot’s actions. Specifically:
Jake describes the Brobot as tender. And Tender is a specific word with specific, almost memetic meaning in Homestuck:
A meaning that only a juvenile teenager LIKE the Auto-Responder would consider sexual. Or at least, someone similarly trapped in immaturity.
Yeah. I know fanon is really pervasive about this idea that the Brobot was on the list of sexual aggressors, but the only real implication the canon itself makes is that it was doing tame proposals and handholds like this. That’s what Jake is referring to. It becomes problematic for him, but only because of the AR’s taunting and the fact that he and Dirk can’t figure out how to talk about it.
Brain Ghost Dirk makes some comments to this effect, however–likely reflecting the way the AR has messed with Jake’s head and successfully made him conflate the way the AR sees him and the way Dirk sees him. Even after the AR stops being an active presence in Jake’s life, it still makes its impact known through BGD’s characterization.
We also have no reason to believe Dirk even knows Brain Ghost Dirk exists, let alone has any active say in what he says or how he acts, either. BGD is, after all, predominantly Jake’s brain–and thus a reflection of, at best, how he THINKS Dirk sees him.
Note how even though Jake fully expects Brain Ghost Dirk to make lascivious and leery comments to him, he never expects Brain Ghost Dirk to try to touch him in a way he doesn’t want to be touched. On top of that, In fact, Jake makes a point of noting that Dirk is more conscientious towards him than either the AR or Brain Ghost Dirk:
And then, of course Jane literally threatens Jake with sexual slavery (while corrupted by an evil supercomputer):
So yeah, Jake is pretty uncomfortable with being seen as sexy by the time Aranea gets to him. It wouldn’t be unreasonable if the idea of being seen as sexy–or even just wearing short shorts–was ruined for him completely.
It wouldn’t even be unreasonable if his image of Dirk was tarnished, even though Dirk wasn’t really responsible for what was happening any more than he was.
But different people respond to trauma differently. And once Aranea objectifies him completely and renders him a tool–literally lightning him up and making it so ALL EYES are on him right when Jake feels most exposed and vulnerable, Jake responds in a pretty peculiar way.
With his Hope powers unlocked, Jake could theoretically do anything. Send hordes of angels to attack, make himself invisible, bring Grandma back from the dead…given what Jake actually ends up doing, it doesn’t make much sense to imagine arbitrary limits on his power. Because what Jake does when he needs to feel safe is make his imaginary friend real.
Again: Making something fake real is, by definition, pretty much the hardest thing to do–both in real life, and to convey compellingly narratively.
Even Jake teleporting his grandma from the past and reviving her to come protect him would be more reasonable a storytelling move than Jake being able to create matter and a personality out of thin air. You would only need Time and Space powers to theoretically pull of that absurd feat, so it would technically be possible to accomplish.
Making your imaginary friend real, though? That’s completely impossible for everyone, everywhere. Except for Jake English.
But Jake English can do anything, which means what we actually does reflects not only what he wants, but what he wants MORE than anything else possible to him.
And what he wants is Dirk Strider, coming to his rescue and keeping him safe from his latest aggressor. Kinda like Brobot always protected Jake from feeling unsafe when he was threatened:
Brain Ghost Dirk even calls himself Jake’s boyfriend, and this is after Dirk broke up with him and he worried about not being able to love anyone:
And right before Dirk breaks them off, while Jake is in trickster form and completely uninhibited, he confesses feelings to Dirk and makes a point to note he was willing to be romantically involved with him:
And luckily, as for his relationship with his shorts, Jake had a good pal give him some advice and boost his self-confidence:
And over the course of [S] Credits, Jake apparently patches things up enough with Dirk that they’re living together and can comfortably fight for fun like he always wanted. On top of that, he’s recovered his confidence in his image enough that he can act out the sexy superhero fantasy he loved so much:
Both his relationship with Dirk and his relationship with his body are sorted out, and Jake’s now happy and comfortable with himself. How it happened, exactly? Who knows–there’s as many different ways it could’ve gone down as you can imagine. But the fact is, it did. And it was laid out this way from the beginning.
What’s the exact nature of Dirk and Jake’s arrangement? Not really relevant. What we know is that they’re living together, that Jake was always willing to have a relationship with him and that never stopped being a thing, and that Jake trusts Dirk with his safety over literally anything else.
What we know is that they’re best friends and mutually romantically interested in each other, whether or not they decide to pursue that.
We also know Jake always liked dressing sexy so long as he was safe and didn’t have to worry about people dehumanizing him. And in this new world, he can do that as much as he wants, too:
Anyway Jake English is the best character in Homestuck and he’s happy with his boyfriend Dirk canonically, and he’s also happy and comfortable with his body while doing it because that was never the issue when he was with Dirk.
Tomorrow I should be following this up with one last Jake post–this one talking about how Jake is way way smarter than everyone thinks he is. You know. Except for Dirk, who explicitly knows Jake is smart.
[Public Squid Notice] We received a technical
update about the SplatNet 2 Gear Shop in the Nintendo Switch Online app. During
a short amount of time after the servers went live, a few gear items paired up
with incorrect gear abilities. For example, Ninja Squid, which is meant to only
attach to clothing, was attached to shoes. The gear in question are the four in
the above image. As of now, this issue has been fixed, and such gear items will
no longer appear in the Gear Shop.
An update will be made in the near future to replace the Gear Ability of
these items with the same main Gear Ability that will be available in the
stores in the game. We appreciate your understanding.
You seem to have a major problem with the Future Trunks ending. If you don't mind me asking why?
Haha sure I’ll tell ya XP
Okay so my main problem with this ending is how everybody literally died. Yep, Future Bulma, Future Yajirobe, those small kids are all dead.
If that wasn’t bad enough, Future Zeno got involved and wiped out his entire timeline meaning those who recently died don’t even get the luxury of being in the afterlife. They just cease to exist.
And with this it just made all of Future Trunks’ struggles that he fought, bled and literally died for entirely pointless. Sure he gets to live in some other timeline created by Whis, I’m just like, “Why can’t they just stay in the present timeline?” Personally that’d be way more satisfying than what we got. I know some people might argue that conflicts with the ending of Dragon Ball Z but honestly who cares about the ending anymore? Super has done so much stuff where it can’t even coexist? Like the “ten years of peace” for everyone?? Or the fact how Bulma said she hasn’t seen Goku in Five Years yet in the current arc it’s Age 780 and the ending to Z takes place in Age 784??
Speaking of which this timeline with another Future Trunks and Future Mai, it’s not even it’s Future Trunks’ and Future Mai’s world or the people their familiar with. In a sense, those people are illusions and the real people they care about are dead. So if you want to get down to it, Zamasu won.
And not only that but Trunks failed miserably.
Not just that but it contradicts the theme from the earlier points of the arc where it seemed to push the notion of “Quit having the gods clean up all your problems!” and now that point is moot since in the end, they had to rely on the gods to fix their problems. I can’t even see this ending as “bittersweet” like the show is trying to make me since it was played up for laughs with the “Zeno needs a friend” subplot.
So this ending isn’t bittersweet but just tragic.
And then we have the ending where Gohan arrives with Future Trunks seeing Future Gohan in him which i was utterly indifferent towards.
One reason being was I was just glad Gohan appeared in an episode but the reason was I couldn’t help but wonder why was Gohan absent from that goodbye dinner scene?? It just seemed like Toei was trying too hard to pull at the heartstrings of the viewers with flashbacks of Future Gohan and the sad music they played during that scene.
And it’s not just the ending of this arc I have a problem with but other stuff. One of which being that Goku Black’s origin makes no sense along with there being missed opportunities. Like why couldn’t the Evil Containment Wave seal Zamasu?
Instead it was played for a worthless joke that was unfunny and quite frankly…irritating.
However, one thing I loved in the ending was the Trunks-Vegeta goodbye scene! It’s a scene I loved that showed how far the bond between Future Trunks and Vegeta came. ^_^
But overall I give the arc a 3/10 and wouldn’t recommend this arc to anyone.