funny student notes

Being a Musical Theatre Major at a Performing Arts School: The Musical
  • Grease: I've got bills, they're multiplying!
  • Rent: I still can't f*cking paaaaay last year's rent!
  • Fun home: I am writing a thesis on Joan!....and Shakespeare....and writing a monologue for stage acting....and transposing for vocal 1.....and memorizing a script....all in one night.....help me.
  • Cats: Memory! I wish mine was better. Because I can't remember, the answers to this test.
  • A chorus line: "So, did you high school drama class help you in any way?"
  • *Beings to belt "Nothing."*
  • Heathers: I need cash now! I'm a student in deeeeept. I don't care how! I'm a student in deeeeeept!
  • The Lion King: NAAAAAAAHICANTAFFORDANYTNINGOTHERTHANAPIIIIZZZAA AND NOODLES.
  • Legally Blonde: Look at my name on the casting list! The directors know that I exist!
  • Phantom of the Opera: The final of the opera is near, it hurts my brain.
  • Sweeney Todd: We all deserve to pass! Tell you why my professor, you big ass! I've had to work two jobs, Mr professor. That's right, two, that's right, two, that's right, two. All while trying to hand in my essays! And auditing for the college plays! You've only got this one job to do! Yes we all deserve to pass! Every single person here in this class!
  • Into the Woods: Into my class I have to go! I hate to leave, I have to though. Into my class and so it's time I must leave this tiny dorm room.
  • The Wiz: I wish I was home, I wish I was back there. Where I don't have to pay rent!
  • Wicked: My grades are starting to go dooooooooown.
  • Hamilton: I'm re-reading the notes you taught me. I'm searching and scanning for answers. In every line, for some kind of sign.
British state school drama

At my school, on Year 13’s last day (context for non-Brits, this is the last year of secondary school before you go to uni or get a job or whatever), they have a costume parade. Everyone else is allowed out to lunch early and about halfway through the lunch break, the parade begins. Normally the leavers troll everyone too.

One year they handed out letters at the school gate saying that the next day (their parade day) would be non school uniform (because we wear uniforms in Britain), ‘signed’ The Leadership Team (that’s the headteacher, deputy head and assistant head). Most people realised it was a prank and the school put an urgent, all caps-lock message on the school website, but we got to take the piss out of the few kids who did show up in their own clothes.

One year they stuck pictures of Nicolas Cage’s head on all the fire exit signs on the little mans head, and just generally around the school. That was about three years ago and we still find random Nicolas Cage heads around the building.

The funniest year was four years ago. All the younger kids, including me and my friends at the time, were sat eating lunch. At our school we have an outdoor area, but with a canvas roof, called the Hub. The buildings for lessons branch off out of the Hub. These buildings are three storeys tall so there are balconies running all the way around the Hub. As everyone was peacefully eating their lunch, the Year 13 attacked us from the balconies with eggs. Some were rubber but some were real. One cracked on my friends head and she had egg in her hair for the rest of the day. The next wave of attack was flour. By this point, everyone was screaming and those lucky enough to have umbrellas with us were hiding (we’re not allowed into the lesson blocks at lunch so that wasn’t an option). It was absolute chaos and it went on for the whole of lunch (about an hour). Every time we thought it was over and we sat down to eat, another attack of flour and egg would be launched down from the balconies. The Year 13s weren’t allowed to do their parade as punishment that year.

There are also always people in the parade with water guns that fire at everyone watching, but that’s a tradition that we’d be surprised if they stopped.

When you’re in class and the teacher starts rambling about that the human mind creates the structure of human experience, that reason is the source of morality, that aesthetics arises from a faculty of disinterested judgment, that space and time are forms of our sensibility, and that the world as it is “in-itself” is independent of our concepts of it. And you’re like

Kant relate