You guys, last night when I was cleaning I found my diary from when I was four, and it is literally the most pure and wholesome thing I have ever seen.
I don’t think I really understood the concept of a diary. There are exactly two real events listed– the fact that I brought my brother some beef jerky, and an acknowledgement of the fact that it was, at some point, Father’s day. Every other “entry” is just a description of things and people I loved.
Harry: Remember Eggsy, that your fork always stays in the left hand and your knife in the right.
Jack, gesturing to Eggsy: Also kid, if you want to eat like an American you can use the zig-zag method; which is bascically changing your left utensil with your right utensil. It’s easier, at least for me.
Harry, annoyed: Good advice, Jack. But I do believe that you follow the host. Which is me.
Eggsy: Harry! He’s just being helpful. I don’t know any of this shit. Thank you, Jack.
Jack: No problem, Eggsy. If you want, I can give you other lessons. If you know what I mean.