funny queue tag

4

You guys, last night when I was cleaning I found my diary from when I was four, and it is literally the most pure and wholesome thing I have ever seen.

I don’t think I really understood the concept of a diary. There are exactly two real events listed– the fact that I brought my brother some beef jerky, and an acknowledgement of the fact that it was, at some point, Father’s day. Every other “entry” is just a description of things and people I loved.

anonymous asked:

If you do the cooking by the book then you'll have a-

((…cake.))

Harry: Remember Eggsy, that your fork always stays in the left hand and your knife in the right.

Jack, gesturing to Eggsy: Also kid, if you want to eat like an American you can use the zig-zag method; which is bascically changing your left utensil with your right utensil. It’s easier, at least for me.

Harry, annoyed: Good advice, Jack. But I do believe that you follow the host. Which is me.

Eggsy: Harry! He’s just being helpful. I don’t know any of this shit. Thank you, Jack.

Jack: No problem, Eggsy. If you want, I can give you other lessons. If you know what I mean.

Eggsy: *blushes*

Harry: *looks into the camera like in the office*

Daehyun: Why do people act like being a vampire is so great. You can’t eat garlic bread, so what’s the point?

  • Cal: ....Mare? Why is your head on my chest?
  • Mare: umm...you know, just making sure you're still alive
  • Cal: you aren't seriously worried that I'm going to die in my sleep...are you?
  • Mare: *rolls over* Death, demise, die, those are my least favorite words right now.
What you should say when you meet James Bond
  • Aries: There's not enough room in this elevator for me and your ego.
  • Taurus: You're a kite dancing in a hurricane, Mr Bond.
  • Gemini: Please don't talk to me like I'm stupid... It's unattractive.
  • Cancer: Go and stick your head in the sand and think about your future.
  • Leo: If you could avoid killing every possible lead, it would be deeply appreciated.
  • Virgo: Oh good, here comes a train.
  • Libra: Everything he touches withers and dies.
  • Scorpio: Welcome, James. It's been a long time... and, finally, here we are. What took you so long?
  • Sagittarius: A license to kill is also a license not to kill.
  • Capricorn: 007, what the hell are you doing? Are you kidnapping me?
  • Aquarius: I have pills for everything. Some make you taller... some make you forget.
  • Pisces: Don't worry you're not my type.

anonymous asked:

Any fun facts about Slovenia?

if you convert the native name of the country (slovenija) into numbers using the native alphabet, you get 19+13+16+23+6+15+10+11+1=114. and if you add up 1+1+4, you get 6….

if you add up the numbers as single digits like so: 1+9+1+3+1+6+2+3+6+1+5+1+0+1+1+1, not only do you get 42 (!), but 4+2 also gives you a 6….

if you add all of those together: 114+42+1+1+4+4+2 you get 168 > 1+6+8 = 15 > 1+5 = 6….

fun for the whole family