funny pregnancy posts

2

I saw someone on youtube do this and I thought the idea was adorable. Second thought was: Arnold would be a big enough of a sap to want to do this if he saw it. He’d also be artistically talented enough to want to paint it himself.

Helga was kind of ‘eeeh’ about it b/c it would be washed away afterward so what would the point be but she could tell he really wanted to do it so she was like ‘FINE’. She’s trying not to laugh at how focused he is, also it kind of tickles too. She ends up really liking it ‘cause it’s cute.

This is basically how they let everyone know what they’re having.

By this point Helga isn’t freaking out as much about the pregnancy or the impending motherhood, at least not as much as she did in the beginning. 

Okay, let me tell you a story. So one time my friend was complaining about cramps and sickness and other kind of stuff, and I was like ‘Lol, maybe you’re pregnant’ but I was totally joking because she didn’t even have sex and she was like ‘It’s not like you can get pregnant without having sex’ and that was the moment. The moment when boredom came over me and I told her following:
“Well, actually you can. Scientists found out that there are some berries, like strawberies for example, that have an hormon in them that can get you pregnant. It’s called Oxidberrimenia and only happened like three times but since you’ve got a weak immune system, it’s very likely that it has happened to you.”
And she actually believed it.
Anyway, after that I texted my other friends and told them about it and one of them had the idea to build a fake pregnancy test (basically, it was a piece of paper that had some medical stuff written and a large black stripe of black felt-tip pen on it).
The next day we met up with our friend and she was doing the 'pregnancy test’ (she had to spit on it and if the stripe would turn blue she’d be 'pregnant’), of course the stripe turned blue because that’s what usually happens to black felt-tip pens if you wet them. And then she started crying for like four hours because she really believed she was impregnated by a strawberry. But after a while I’ve got such a bad conscience that I told her the truth and she wasn’t even mad, she was just so relieved that she wasn’t pregnant that she started crying again.

does anyone else always think of pregnancy when someone mentions nine months?

“nine months until exams”
if i had sex now i might be able to skip some exams because i’d be giving birth

“my birthday’s in nine months”
if i had sex now my kid could share birthdays with you