funny politicians

The Ephebians believed that every man should have the vote (provided that he wasn’t poor, foreign, nor disqualified by reason of being mad, frivolous, or a woman). Every five years someone was elected to be Tyrant, provided he could prove that he was honest, intelligent, sensible, and trustworthy. Immediately after he was elected, of course, it was obvious to everyone that he was a criminal madman and totally out of touch with the view of the ordinary philosopher in the street looking for a towel. And then five years later they elected another one just like him, and really it was amazing how intelligent people kept on making the same mistakes.
—  Terry Pratchett - Small Gods
“And these are your reasons my lord?”
“Do you think I have others?” Said lord Vetinari. “My motives, as ever, are entirely transparent.”
Hughnon reflected that ‘entirely transparent’ transparent meant either that you could see right through them, or that you couldn’t see them.
—  Terry Pratchett - The Truth
Listen, Peaches, trickery is what humans are all about,” said the voice of Maurice. “Theyre so keen on tricking one another all the time that they elect governments to do it for them.
—  Terry Pratchett - The Amazing Maurice And His Educated Rodents

Front Porch Rules

  1. No wolf-whistling at women at the stop sign.
  2. No lying (Politicians excluded).
  3. No spitting (People actually use the sidewalk).
  4. No bellowing, bitching or bossing (Take it home).
  5. Complaints will be ignored and your tab increased.
  6. Keep hands and opinions to yourself.
  7. What is drunk on the porch stays on the porch.
  8. Every other rule we make up on the spot.

A sign from where we had lunch today.