funny mom blog

The worlds most awkward situation.

Yesterday I had the weirdest experience I could have wished for, like ever, it was a disturbing natural phenomenon that made me very uncomfortable.

I was sat on a bench in town, I’d just bought my daughter some new shoes and we’d sat down to switch the shoes over, so we were just sat talking and putting shoes on just like normal people, I’m just looking down fiddling with her shoes, making sure they are good to go and I just hear this voice with a Scottish accent out of nowhere say “Aren’t you a little young to be a mother?” and I was literally about to go full blown crazy on this guy because I was just thinking like “omfg how rude are you!?” but as I looked up I was like “ACTUALLY I’M 23……” and just stopped talking because I was quite horrified to discover that when I looked up and saw his face he literally looked like the literal clone of my ex and I was like sat there, staring in shock, this guy literally was like just stood there while I was just staring at his face and my brain was doing the whole “facial recognition” thing some tumbleweed went by and by this point I think he realised he was rather rude and tried to kind of be like “oh well 23 isn’t that bad” and then I went to walk away and he said “are you single?” to which I was shocked because he’d just stood there and basically made a rude thoughtless comment and then expected to get my number and his face was offending my vision because he just looked like this ex I have who there is just no word bad enough to describe, I would literally say he is my 2nd/3rd worst ex boyfriend. I told him “I have a boyfriend.” which is the truth and he replied “all the pretty ones are taken.” and I just kind of walked away because it was so awkward and I couldn’t help thinking “yeah, I have a boyfriend and even if I did not I would not give my number to who looks like he’s already hurt me.” Like I am not even joking, this guy looked so much like him the only reason I knew it wasn’t him was because of the accent, I felt like looking up his mothers number to ask if he had an estranged Scottish twin, it was such a bad natural phenomenon. 

Wanting to be an Actor be like...

Me: Mom I want to be an actor

Mom: No be an accountant they make money

Me: Literally everyone regrets becoming an accountant

Mom: Doctor

Me: They hold another person’s life in their hand and if they fail they get sued

Mom: Lawyer

Me: Mom I can’t even stop myself from stealing a pencil

Mom: Drug Dealer

Me: For the love of god tell me how that’s better than becoming an actor

Mom: I can get a discount