funny hp

  • (Disclaimer: This was based off of a tumblr post, but like wow, the backlash, so I rewrote it)
  • Question: There are seven chairs and ten kids. What do you do? The objective is to sit on a chair.
  • Hufflepuff: Just sit on each other's laps!
  • Ravenclaw: Or you could just bring three more in... Kind of an effortless solution.
  • Gryffindor: We could have a musical chairs game and fight for them
  • Slytherin: I really don't care as long as I get to sit
  • Sirius: Don't worry Remus, if I was a girl I would 100% date you.
  • James: I thought you said you'd date ME if you were a girl?
  • Sirius: No, I said I'd have sex with you. Meanwhile, I would have a long and fulfilling relationship with Moony.
  • Remus: Meanwhile?
Remus’s Teaching Methods

Can we plz talk about Remus’s teaching methods in PoA. Okay just listen:

First off, he showed up late to HIS OWN CLASS!

Secondly, he told them to put away there books and took a walk through the castle, to the STAFF ROOM.

Thirdly, when Peeves started to call him “Loony, Loony, Lupin” in front of his class, he SMILED. Then shoot gum up Peeves nose. And TAUGHT this spell to the class.

Fourthly, when Snape rudely insulted Neville, he made brought Neville up to the front of class, then proceeded to make a Snape/Boggart dress in drag.

Fithly, “ ‘Now then,’ said Professor Lupin, beckoning the class toward the end of the room, where there was nothing but an old wardrobe where the teachers kept their spare robes. As Professor Lupin went to stand next to it, the Wardrobe gave a sudden wobble, banging off the wall.

‘Nothing to worry about,’ said Professor Lupin calmly because a few people had jumped backward in alarm. ‘There’s a boggart in there.’”

- Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, J.K. Rowling, Page: 133

Just think of the smirk he is fighting as he says that so casually. Oh yeah, just a monster in the wardrobe.

Sixthly, he casually keeps dangerous creatures in Hogwarts to teach with.

Seventhly, the final. It was an obstacle corse, “ Professor Lupin had compiled the most unusual exam any of them had taken; a sort of obstacle corse outside in the sun, where they had to wade across a deep paddling pool containing a gindylow, cross a series of potholes full of Red Caps, squish their way across a patch of marsh while ignoring misleading directions from a hinkypunk, then climb into an old trunk and battle with a new boggart.”

- Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban, J.K. Rowling, Page: 318

Think about Lupins thought process; Exams, a test, no, fun, how about a game, sort of game, what is a game/test, obstacle corse, full of, dangerous creatures, yes that will work.

Remus teaching methods might be bizarre, but Remus is still may peoples favorite DADA teacher after many years. They did learn the most, that actually stuck in there brains.

Every loved him, but Malfoy and his “gang”. He was fun, quirky, and just plain cool. He was an amazing teacher in bad circumstances. The only DADA teacher that didn’t have some other agenda.

He truly was a great teacher and that is just another reason to love Remus Lupin.

6

make me choose: @nevillelonbottom​ asked Flitwick or Trelawney

I frequently act as though I am not possessed of the Inner Eye, so as not to make others nervous.

Ron can't take it
  • *harry and ron: walking, talking*
  • Draco: *mutters as he passes them* potter give me affection
  • Harry: what was that?
  • Draco: I said- um- fuck,
  • Ron: *who heard it* no, nothing rhymes with affection
  • Harry: he said affecti-?!
  • Draco: g-give me an erect-
  • Ron: NOTHING RHYMES WITH AFFECTION JUST STOP
Fandoms
  • Doctor Who: guys what was that sound?
  • Supernatural: should we get the salt?
  • Marvel: wait it sounds familiar
  • Merlin: I think it's...
  • Hannibal: it's not
  • DC: it can't be
  • Game of Thrones: it is...
  • Fandoms: no
  • Tumblr: no
  • World: no
  • Donald Trump: no
  • Geese: no
  • Sherlock: *bursts through door*
  • All fandoms: *screams of terror*
  • Supernatural: *flings holy water*
  • Harry Potter: they've awoken...
  • Sherlock: miss me ;)?
Shit Slytherins Say: #42
  • Hufflepuff: "I'm having a problem with this person..."
  • Slytherin: "Kill them."
  • Hufflepuff: "no"
  • Slytherin: "Then I will kill them FOR you."
  • Hufflepuff: "NO"
If you ever feel sad just remember that Snape had to teach Luna potions too

Snape: What…are you doing, Miss Lovegood?

Luna: I decided not to make this potion, Professor. It has bad energy.

Snape: You…what?

Luna: Bad energy. Bad. But I revitalized this flower for you from the ingredients and you can put it in your hair.

Snape: …..

Luna: I think it would look very nice on you. Keeps away the Wrackspurts, you know.

Snape: *awkward slides away*

Draco when Scorpius tells him about Rose
  • Scorpius: Dad!! I have a date!
  • Draco: That's great! Albus is a really lucky boy, you know?
  • Scorpius: Albus? I'm talking about Rose...
  • Draco: Wh- what? Who the fuck is Rose, Scorpius? WHO THE FUCK IS ROSE?
  • Scorpius: Hum... Rose Granger-Weasley, dad
  • Draco: Sit down Scorpius, I have a story to tell you, the story of a boy who made all the wrong choices.