funny bastards

Kaz: So your boyfriend sneezed earlier and I accidentally said “shut the fuck up” instead of “bless you”

Wylan: How do you accidentally say shut the fuck up

Inej: Once you hit rock bottom, the only place left to go is up.

Kaz: You underestimate me. I’ve brought my pickaxe and I’m ready to dig.

If Life Gives You Lemons, You...
  • Kaz: Sell them to the pigeons.
  • Inej: Use the peel for treating wounds.
  • Jesper: Use them as shooting practice.
  • Nina: Make lemon waffles.
  • Matthias: I don’t like lemons.
  • Kuwei: Make jurda parem antidote.
  • Wylan: Squirt them in my dad’s eyes.
  • *everybody turns to look at Wylan*

*Kaz accidentally snaps his cane in half*

Kaz: It’s fine

*Kaz trips and falls down the stairs*

Kaz: This is A-OK

*Kaz almost cuts his fingers off when chopping carrots*

Kaz: It’s all cool

*Kaz stubs his toe on a table*

Kaz: Okie dokie it’s chill

*Kaz bleeding to death on a table*

Inej: KAZ YOU NEED BANDAGES

Kaz: It’s F I N E