funny authors

  • <p> <b>Kubo:</b> the story of two ice skating dudes. Yeah, they love each other or whatever.<p/><b>Investors:</b> two dudes? Umm... well.. i mean... sure?<p/><b>Outcome:</b> $$$$$$$$<p/><b>Kubo:</b> a jealous dude naked on top of a building.<p/><b>Investors:</b> what? You do know we're trying to make money? how do you even come up with-<p/><b>Outcome:</b> $$$$$$$$$$$$<p/><b>Kubo:</b> an exorcism and everyone in thongs.<p/><b>Outcome:</b> $$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$<p/><b>Investors:</b> how in the fuck does one even?<p/></p>
4

Young Hemingway dressed as a girl. He has a dark past of his mother forcefully dressing him up as a girl. Hemingway developed his efforts to ostentatiously portray his masculinity ever since. However, he still looks quite good in a dress.

Popular writer who employs the hard boiled literary style. He enjoys hobbies such as boxing and hunting wild animals, moreover he invest a lot of effort into outwardly expressing his masculinity. He is friends with Fitzgerald and worries about her debauchery.

Ernest Hemingway

My socks are up high.
My Nike’s are sick.
I gotta question for you babe:
u got kik?

You shower without me.
You won’t send me nudes.
I thought you were pretty,
But you’re actually very rude.

I blare my music.
I check out your butt.
Please send nudes.
haha and then what? :)

—  Jared Grumney // Straight Boys
Commander, I always used to consider that you had a definite anti-authoritarian streak in you.”
“Sir?”
“It seems that you have managed to retain this even though you are authority.”
“Sir?”
“That’s practically zen.
—  Terry Pratchett - Feet Of Clay