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3

He had been staring into nothingness for the past hour. Probably for the first time in his whole life, his mind was just blank, protecting him from the horrible reality.

At first, he didn’t even notice the hand on his shoulder. And when he did, he refused to acknowledge it. The person, whoever it was, gave up and left with a sigh.

He heard it a few seconds later. Hushed whispers, not meant for him to hear. But he heard.

“This is just ridiculous, Tasha. They were only together for two months, for fuck’s sake!”

“Go and say it to his face, Clint. I’m sure a double funeral will be fun.”

“I agree with Clint. He has a right to mourn, of course, but he’s completely fallen apart, can’t you see?”

“In case you’ve forgotten, Cap, the storm outside is not exactly natural. Thor’s falling apart, too.”

“But Loki was Thor’s brother.”

“And Tony’s lover.”

“Fine. But Thor’s crying. Tony’s not. Thor is showing some emotions, while Tony-”

“Tony what, Barton?”

Natasha jumped to her feet and frowned at Clint and Steve over her shoulder, Neither of them tried to follow her when she walked back to Tony’s seat and sat opposite of him.

“Hey,” she said, softly. “You okay?”

He looked at her like a kicked puppy and she immediately started to regret her question.

“What do you think, Nat?” he asked. “No. I am not okay.”

“Tony…” she sighed.

He took a deep breath. It was time to admit the truth, no matter how much it would hurt.

“Loki’s dead,” he whispered and closed his eyes, hoping it would soothe the stinging feeling in them, but it only caused the horrible memory of Loki falling to the ground flash through his mind.

A tear rolled down Tony’s cheek. He shook his head.

“I will never be okay again.”

4

Funny how the heart can be deceiving.

4

Where can you run to escape from yourself?
Where you gonna go? Salvation is here.
{for goddamnhella}

6

Pepper’s dead, Killian’s still running rampant, and Tony’s crash-landed somewhere that better be Antarctica damn it, JARVIS. Somehow he only has Thor’s crazy younger brother for company. Who thankfully hasn’t lost his shit yet. Because Tony’s not going to accidentally tell him about the adoption thing. Also those blue-skinned, blood-eyed giants? Not letting Loki anywhere near them.

Really, Tony’s fine with this being a huge, panic-induced dream.