from my momma


Today is this gorgeous woman’s birthday!🎉🎊

To the most important and ambitious woman in my life, coming from Barbados at 18, without her parents and all alone to achieve her dreams! My biggest inspiration, your drive is crazy, when you want it you WILL get it and your optimism about everything brightens my life. To the woman who accepts me for all my crazy and vulgarity and pushes me even when I don’t push myself. To the woman who has loved me unconditionally for the past 22 years of my life without a doubt. You make me so proud to be called your daughter. Im actually about to start ugly crying so I’m going to wrap this up lol, but a big Happy Birthday to my beautiful momma, Giselle Justine Reich!! 💞💞💞

Just a small appreciation post for Momma Dank over here :P

But seriously, thank you mom for everything, thank you for being there, for being supportive, for believing in me, for all of the very inappropriate conversations that end with me laughing so hard I can barely breathe, for never ceasing to be the weirdest and best mom ever. And even when we do but heads (which is very often now XD) I still love you in the end! Here’s to many more years of your Justin Bieber impressions and the silliest dancing there is!

whispers if u say ‘meredith quill’ 3 times while looking into ur mirror peter will appear in ur bathtub, crying

Joker’s Daughter Part 2

“Daddy! You’re home!!” You cy, scrambling down the stairs, “I missed you!”

“Hello, Princess! How’s my favorite girl?”

“I’m the best, daddy! I had so much fun with, Uncle Frost! “

The Joker grinned, “I’m sure you did, Pumpkin. Did Frosty keep you busy while daddy handled business?”

“Yup!” You glance behind him, confused, “Where’s momma?”

“She wanted to spend some time with Poison Ivy tonight.” The Joker grinned, “The girls have a plan for Batsy”

You giggle and clap your hands, “I hope they have fun! But” you clear your throat, “daddy can I have something?”

“You can have whatever you want, princess! You know that!” you can already see the manic glint in your daddy’s eyes, he’s already plotting how to get whatever it is to you.

“I want the Red Hood” You try to sound confident, but don’t know if you managed it.

Daddy stiffens immediately and hold you at arm’s length, “Why would you want him? You can have anyone, Princess! Why would you choose him?”

“He isn’t scared of you! That’s why!”

“Y/N …”

“You make everyone scared of you, daddy! I just want someone who will love me for me! Not for your power!” You can feel tears building up in your eyes.

“Sorry to interrupts, Mr. J but your wife is on the phone”

The Joker growled and pushed you towards your uncle, “Take her up to her room, Frost. I have business tonight”


“No, Princess. You are gonna stay here tonight, I need to take care of a few things”

You nod and quietly turn to follow Uncle Frost. You really wish that you had waited fro momma to come home, but you were just too excited to wait! Momma and daddy’s relationship had gotten better ever since she got pregnant. According to Auntie Ivy it had been really bad in the beginning, that daddy had hurt momma a lot, but it hadn’t been that way for a while.

“Do you think daddy’s mad at me, Uncle Frost?” you whisper.

“I think he was just surprised, Princess. You know he would give you anything, but you asked for a vigilante that is constantly trying to ruin Mr. J’s plans. The Red Hood seems to have a particular disliking for Mr. J too, so your father might have been a little upset”

“I met him today, Uncle Frost. I met the Red Hood, he saved me”

Frost stopped and quickly spun you around, “What do you mean he saved you?”

“When I ran away, there was a guy in the alley who grabbed me” You didn’t really see it as a big deal, but uncle Frost’s eyes widened in horror, “He didn’t touch me! Don’t worry! Red Hood beat him up for me!”

“Why didn’t you tell me about this?” Frost hissed.

“I don’t want you to tell daddy! Please don’t!” You beg, you decide to pull out the puppy-dog eyes. Uncle Frost can’t resist those, so reluctantly he nods, “And then Hoodie and I started talking, and I gave him a kiss! And he said that he wanted to see me again! But I want to see him outside of the Hood. I want daddy to not hurt him!”

Uncle Frost sighed, “I know you really want this, and I know you don’t want him to be hurt. I also know you and Mr. J know exactly who they are under the mask. You have to give him a little time, sweetheart. He has to get used to the thought of you growing up, you know he’ll always see you as his princess.”

You wrap your uncle in a tight hug and nuzzle against him, “I really want him, Uncle Frost”

“I know you do, but you have to be patient”

“I will, promise”

“And you can’t run away anymore! You scared the shit out of me! If something had happened to you …”

“But nothing did! Nothing happened! Red Hood stopped it! It’s like I have a guardian angel watching over me!”

“Yeah, a guardian angel who likes to beat up your father, and who likes to use a gun”

You giggle, “But you like to use a gun, Uncle Frost!”

“I suppose I do, but Mr. J know I’ll die to protect you. Will your Red Hood?”

Once again you manage to slip away from your guards, this time however you head up to the rooftops instead of into an alley.

“Y/N!! Y/N!! Not again!! Where are you?!?”

You can’t help but laugh at your Uncle Frost’s distressed voice, “Silly Uncle Frost, as if I would give up this far into the game!”

“And what are you doing all the way up here, Princess?”

You whirl around, your blue and purple streaked hair twirling around you, “Hoodie!!”

Red Hood jumped down from the taller building, landing silently next to you, “Did you run away again?”

“I had to!” You jut your bottom lip out in a pout, “Daddy’s been trying to keep me in the house. I wanted to see you. I missed you”

Jason chuckled, pulling his helmet off, “You missed me?”

“Of course I did, sugar! Daddy tried to get me to forget about you! He brought home a bunch of guys from his club, but I didn’t want any of them!! I only want you, Jaybird” You whisper, wrapping your arms around his neck.

Jason grinned, “It’s been a week, doll. I thought you forgot about me”

You put one hand on your chest, “I would never forget about you!”

The safety on a gun clicks off from behind you and in an instant Jason had you pushed behind him.

“Step away from my daughter” Your momma snarled

“No momma! Don’t shoot him!!” You try to get around Jason, you know that momma won’t hurt you, but she has no problem hurting anyone in the Batfamily.

Jason just continues to hold you behind him, “I’m not going to hurt her, Harley. She hasn’t done anything wrong”

“Yeah, and the minute she does you’re going to turn against her. You’re going to hurt my princess, and I’m not going to let you do that, I’m not going to let anyone hurt her” Momma ended up screaming at the end. She raised the gun, ready to shoot.

“Please!” you sob, “Please don’t hurt him”

“Your daddy told me about your infatuation, honey. Puddin’ said you wanted to see him for a date, and then Frosty said that you had managed to get away from the guards and from the house. I knew exactly where my girl was heading, so all I had to do was find Red Hood here, and I knew I would find you”

“Momma please, I’ll go with you. I won’t see him anymore, I promise. Just-just don’t hurt him” you beg.

“No” Jason snapped, “I won’t just give up on you like that, Y/N! You’ve proven that you’re different, that you aren’t a killer, or at least that you don’t kill without due cause.”

“You’ll let her go, Hood, or I’ll shoot you”

“I said no” Jason growled

“Jason please, just let me go, I don’t want her to hurt you, you know momma will. She won’t hesitate”

“You have until the count of three to let my Princess go. One” the gun cocked, “two” momma aims right for Jason’s chest, and you tense, “Three” the gun goes off.

Witch song from Fantastic Beasts

My momma, your momma, gonna catch a witch
My momma, your momma, flying on a switch
My momma, your momma, witches never cry
My momma, your momma, witches gonna die!
Witch number one, drown in a river!
Witch number two, gotta noose to give her!
Witch number three, gonna watch her burn
Witch number four, flogging take a turn.

Little Terran Boy

This is my first Fanfiction in english.
I hope you like it.
Hugs from Germany! :D
Here is some fluff between Yondu, Peter and Kraglin!

Peter wasn’t that long in space. Half a year maybe. At the beginning, he had a lot of problems with the other Ravangers. They hated him. They treated him like they’re about going to eat him. But every time they were rude or disrespectful, there was Yondu. He took good care of him. Even when he was annoyed about this crying little 8-years old boy. In the last days, Peter begun too sniffle. It wasn’t that bad, just a little cold. He was still normal and played with Kraglin the whole time, even when Kraglin had to work. His first mate Kraglin liked this boy very much. The man with the Mohawk and the Captain are the only Ravangers on the ship who doesn’t treat the kid like trash.

“Hey Kid. We will soon arrive on Xander, do you want to come with me and Kraglin?” The Captain asked the boy when they were at lunch in the cafeteria.
The Boy looked Yondu straight in the eyes and smiled. He always had this ‘Angel Smile’. Xander is a big planet with a big city, there are a lot of people. Good and very bad people, meaner than a Ravanger. “Take the hand from Kraglin and don’t get lost.” He told the 8-years old. “When you will get lost boy, it will be the last time with us on this planet.”

The Smile from Peter was about to die for a moment. Because from what he hard the Captain Yondu’s voice, but then the blue man smiled. “But when you behave like a good boy and do as Kraglin and I said. You will get a toy.” This made the boy smile again. “Thanks Captain.” He said and ate his lunch.
A couple of hours later they have landed on the planet Xander. It was a beautiful place, like Terra. Just a little bit more futuristic than Terra. But little they know that the Xandarian flu was going around. Kraglin who was himself an Xanderian had the flu a couple of weeks ago, which Yondu had to take care of Peter so that he won’t get infected too. Because in the biology, Xanderian and Terran was almost the same. They just had blue blood instead of red.

When Yondu was with Stakar, he read a lot of books about other species in this universe. A book about Terran and Xanderian biology was there too. Because on the battlefield, you need to know as much as you can to help your team if they ever get injured. There were people around Kraglin and Peter were coughing and sniffling.
“We should get you a flu shot.” Kraglin said with a worried smile.
“No! I don’t like needles!” the boy to his right screamed. “And I don’t get sick !”
“Alright, alright.” The man said. “But when you will get sick, don’t cry about a headache or fever.”
Peter stuck his tongue out. “I won’t.” he said.

Yondu and the Ravangers are on Xander because they needed suppliers, like water and food. After a couple of hours they finished the suppliers order. The other Ravengers have brought the suppliers onboard of the ship, Kraglin helped them a bit. Peter watched the Ravangers work and Yondu allowed him to have some 'off hand’ time. So he decided to look at the river that was near, the water was so clear. Peter hadn’t seen water that was this clear before.
“Peter! Come here!” said the Captain shouted an hour later and held his hand to peter so that he can take it, Peter came and took the hand once he heard the Captain call for him. His clothes were a bit wet, he have played with the water without falling into the river.
“Your behavior was very good today. I’m proud of you.” He told the 8-years old. “Let’s find you a nice toy, you can have something for 500 units.” (It’s like 30 dollars)

The Lady from the Toy Shop looked at Peter and Yondu. “Aww you have such an adorable boy.” She said as the Captain let go of Peter’s hand and gave him the permission to walk around the shop to find a toy.
“He ain’t by blood.” Yondu said in a very proud voice. “But he is my boy in some kind of way”

Peter looked around the whole shop, they had a lot of good toys. But this time, he does not want something to play with, he wanted something he can look at while he’s listening to his music. And there he saw this rock, it wasn’t really a rock. More like a diamond, it’s shiny and solid. And the price are just at 300 units.
“So you found something boy?” Yondu asked as Peter was next to him. He showed him the diamond rock.
“It remembers me from home and my Momma.” The boy said. “She had a lot of this rocks.”
The Captain knelt down to Peter so he can look in his eyes. “You don’t have to behave like an adult because of the others.” He said. But then he saw the look from Peter and he smiled. “Please don’t grow to fast to be an adult.” He softly ruffled the orange brown hair.
“Lady could you find some books for pre teenage boys for 200 units?” he asked the nice lady and she smiled. Peter coughs a few times and sneezed once. “You okay?” Yondu asked after they leaved the shop with the diamond rock and 3 books.
“I’m ok. Just hungry.” He said shyly. It’s already dark outside and the air has cooled down.
“Ok. We will find some good food.”
“Can we Kraglin bring some too?” Peter asked, he always think about other people.
“Yes we can.” Yondu said. “And we will.”

After the dinner they are on the way home to the ship, Peter was about to fall asleep so Yondu decided to lift the boy up to his arms, to keep him warm and save. Soon Pete fell asleep. Yondu put Peter to bed after he helped the boy to change his day clothes to Pj’s. The boy was so tired so he let him sleep.
“Good Night Star-Lord.” He said to Peter and smiled at the little happy boy who was hugging the diamond rock.
Kraglin heard everything. “You’re really like a father to him.” He said after the Captain closed the door from Peters room, it was right next his own Room.
Yondu blushed. “Shut up.” He said
“Make me.” The man with the Mohawk said.
After the words Yondu pressed his lips to the from his first mate.
“You asked for.” The blue man said.
Kraglin and Yondu are in a fresh relationship, too new to make is official. But Peter already knew the relationship between Yondu and Kraglin.
“Let’s go to bed too.” The Captain said. “I guess the boy is about to get really sick, he had a couple of coughing fits around the day.”
Together, they went to the next room which is captain quarters.

“Captain… I feel hot.” A broken voice said.
Yondu and Kraglin opened they eyes at the same time and looked at Peter who stood by the door.
“What’s up little man?” Kraglin softly asked.
“My head and throat hurts.” Peter said in broken and sick tone as he rubbed his itching eyes.
“Come here boy.” Yondu said and presses a hand against the forehead from the boy. “Slight fever.” He mumbled.
“Can I sleep with you?” Peter asked and made his big puppy eyes.
“Of course.” He nodded and lifted the 8-year old between him and Kraglin. “But tomorrow you will sleep in your own bed.” The Captain said but Peter begun to snuggle between both of them, he felt save and felt asleep again.
“Thanks Daddys…” The boy said.
The heat shot up on the faces from both Yondu and Kraglin, but they said nothing until Peter was really asleep.
“It’s the fevers fault.” The blue man said.
“Yes. Yes the fevers fault.”
They looked down at this little Terran boy.
'He is really cute.’ Yondu taught

In the morning, Kraglin took care of the fever from Peter. The boy was awake but he felt cold and hot at the same time, he got some medication from the medic.
“I..I don’t want to be sick..” he whined and coughed. “Everything hurts”

The man with the Mohawk sighed “Your fever is at 39.8. It’s high for a boy in your age.”
“So the Terran is broken?” Yondu asked and looked worried as he looks at Peter.
“No he is not broken, he is just sick!” Kraglin said and pushed his Captain by the arm.
“Oh yes he is broken!” He said and laughed “We need a new one.” He was only joking about that to make Peter feel better. Just a harmless joke.

“I’m not broken Yondu!”
“You’re still broken boy.”
“I will eat you, you blue idiot!” Peter said again but he laughed.
“No, no boy. I will feed you to the whole crew. They never tasted Terran before.” And he laughed harder.
“You’re so funny and stupid Yondu, I love you like a dad. And Kraglin too” The boy spoke as he was falling asleep again.

I don’t know what I’m doing but it’s all @mommalosthermind ’s fault.

John knew that eventually it would happen. That someday, one of his top fears would come walking in through the office door and there’d be nothing he could do about it. He’d have to sit down and pretend that he wasn’t as affected as he was, that he hadn’t been dreading this moment for years.
He got really good at ignoring the X’s on the calendar leading up to The Day. He would tune out people who would try to question him about what the big red circle meant and he would smile blandly back at them.
If he had to suffer, well, he was going to make sure that everyone else got a teeny taste of it too.

The week leading up to The Day was filled with unusually high calls, so much so, that John lost track of days. Until on that Tuesday, the door to the front of the station was thrown open and standing there was someone in the Beacon County Sheriff Station deputy uniform.
“Oh no.” John sighed looking down into his almost empty cup of coffee.
Poor Maggie at the front desk made a strangled noise as she realized who stood before her.
“Hey everybody! Did you miss-AWK!!” The man tripped on his way through the front door, arms windmilling out and he spun once trying to catch his balance. The momentum pushed him forward until he caught himself braced against the front desk and came face to face with a pale faced receptionist.
His son was home. And now his newest Officer.
John pinched the bridge of his nose. Well, at least he hadn’t broken anything.