friend tip!

Things You Don't Comment On:

- someone’s eating habits

- appearance issues that can’t be fixed there and then

- someone else’s “bad” decision if it can’t now be undone

- someone’s laugh or voice

- someone’s “unrealistic” dreams

- someone “not looking their best” in photos

- someone not wanting to do something and trying to subtly avoid it without making a fuss

- anything that you know will make someone self conscious or insecure unnecessarily

Witchy Sleepover Ideas

A bunch of fun witchy activities that can be done with friends at sleepovers or when just hanging out.

Originally posted by thepumpkinqueenn

  • Cleanse the house using salt or incense, good thing to do before anything else witchy
  • Turn a recipe for food or baked goods into a magical one and make it together
  • Decorate cookies or cupcakes with sigils that will activate when you eat them
  • Make flower crowns with fresh or fake flowers
  • Practice tea magick and then give each other readings from the leaves (tasseography)
  • Practice palm reading on each other
  • Do some tarot readings, oracle readings or other cartomancy techniques especially if everyone brings their own deck
  • Get some rounded wood pieces and some paints and make yourself some homemade simple runes
  • Practice knot magick by making each other friendship bracelets
  • Use beading supplies and charms to make other types of jewelry with intent corresponding with the colors, shapes, and charms of the jewelry and then enchant them to make them even more magickal
  • Make your own poppets with cloth, stuffing, rice, buttons and other ingredients to be used for positive purposes such as self love
  • Enchant each other’s favorite plushies or stuffed animals
  • Make homemade bath bombs, salts, and/or bath potions
  • Do each other’s make up hiding sigils in it and/or practicing glamours
  • Do each other’s nails using color magick, sigils, and other symbols
  • Make homemade magickal candles
  • Watch witchy movies!
  • Decorate binders to make unique new grimoires using paper, glitter, stickers, felt and other materials
  • Work out each other’s natal charts 
  • Practice group energy work and aura reading
  • If everyone is comfortable make a homemade custom Ouija Board/Spirit Board and use it (please note that only do this if everyone is emotionally ready and before I get backlash for suggesting this check out @theouijagirl‘s blog)
  • Make homemade wands using crystals, beads, wires, and paint
  • Make pendulums or dowsing rods
  • Make sachet or jar spells for one another or together
  • Write a brand new spell!
  • Listen to music and use lyrics to write spells, incantations or chants
  • Do witchy arts and crafts like enchanted flower pots using sigils, rock charms, witch’s ladders, pine cone/acorn charms, acorn/seashell candles, ceremony/ritual masks, jewelry, sensory bottles/jars, enchanted slime, witch’s web, offering bowls, etc
  • Make a camp or bonfire and burn some (safe to burn) herbs (practice fire safety and only do this if you have a safe place to make a fire)
  • Soap making/carving
  • Make collages of things that make you feel witchy to put into your grimoires
  • Work on grimoires together and make custom pages, calenders, charts, illustrations, pressings, etc
  • Use erasers and x-acto knives (carefully) to make custom stamps of sigils, animals, words, etc
  • Dream interpretation the next morning
  • Make witchy tea and coffee together
  • Have fun!
🌱 Green Witch Tip 🌱

Grow one plant for each area of your life (mental health, physical health, friendships, etc). Every time you care for that plant, check in with yourself and see if there’s any way you could be helping that part of your life flourish.

Prune/harvest to cut out old issues
Water/fertilize to encourage growth
Repot/add soil for change and new beginnings

Vocabulary prompts for your target language

Wondering what vocab to learn? Are you curious whether your vocabulary is varied enough?

Here are some of the topics you might want to expand in your target language:

  • life and death (eg. stages of life, vocabulary for funeral)
  • family (members of family, family tree)
  • appearance (parts of the body, clothes, verbs of movement, fashion, diets, hairdressing)
  • character (eg. adjectives describing character, personality types, temperaments, emotions, feelings of love, hate, interest etc.)
  • health & sport (eg. parts of the body, diseases, going to the doctor, going to pharmacy, types of accidents, maintaining healthy lifestyle, fitness, gym, cosmetics, going shopping, mental health, sports, olimpics)
  • hobby and holidays (eg. activities of free time, night life, types of holidays in your country or in your target language’s country, active and passive way of spending free time, friends, games)
  • art (painting, drawing, films, literature)
  • house (eg. types of houses, living in a city, on a countryside, different types of rooms at home, neighbors, garden, chemicals for cleaning, activities like cleaning floors, washing the dishes, moving out, renovation)
  • food (eg. types of food, preparing dishes, traditional meals, writing a recipe, healthy foods, eating out) 
  • media (eg. TV, press, internet, news, types of presenters, types of programs, social media, ads)
  • technology (eg. types of jobs in IT industry, computer, phone, internet)
  • travel (eg. types of vacations, days off, business trips, places to go, travel agency, types of tourism, monuments, summertime, nature, names of countries, weather, plants and animals, foreign languages)
  • work & school (eg. professions, looking for a job, job interview, office work, dream jobs, balancing professional life with private, jobs in politics, being a celebrity, summer jobs, business, time management, subjects at school, stages of education)
  • society (eg. culture, social rules, savoir-vivre, law, government, idols, crimes, terrorism, wars, politics, religions, casework, classes in society, race discrimination)

Originally posted by dailyvocab

You can add your own suggestions by sending them to me so that I expanded that list or by reblogging.

I hope this helps someone!

I’m now entering my third semester of my second year college, and I think I’ve gathered enough experience in college to give relevant tips to incoming freshmen or just regular old college students. I’m not an expert in getting all As, not getting those 4.0s in every subject, but I have maintained my place as a Dean’s Lister since my first sem freshmen year, so I think I do have an idea on what I’m talking about. Feel free to take my advice! (or not).

1. seriously, once you get information on your homework/project, start them immediately. DO NOT wait till last minute to complete them because you will regret it. Do them as soon as the professor assigns it to you so you won’t spend the next few weeks stressing out on the amount of homework you have.

2. start creative projects first. unless you can pull creativity out of your hat whenever you need it, I highly suggest you start creative projects as soon as  you get them because trust me when I say you do not want to be decorating/designing shit when the due date is tomorrow.

3. do your best in every assignment; trust me, the points will count at the end of the semester.

4. do extra credit work and treat it as priority work; excess points are cushion points. 

5. group projects suck but here’s a good rule to keep in mind: if you’re the leader, delegate those tasks (read up on division of labor). if you’re a group member, do the delegated task as best as you can. know your goal as a group; are you guys in it to get to know each other and build rapport? then the output won’t matter as much and focus on helping and getting to know each other. Is the output the most important part? Then be real with each other; if you can’t do this task, then don’t do it & instead give it to someone else. Some may not even get any work at all, because what matters is the output. 

friends/other people/professors
1.  keep your circle small. your friends are there to guide you, support you and tell you when you’re wrong. find the crowd you vibe with the most because trust me, the right friends are medicine to all college problems

2. those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind. keep that in mind, my dear.

3. love the professor? do your best in their class. hate the professor? do your best in their class. it doesn’t matter whether you hate the prof or not; they still hold your grade at the end of the semester. if you really can’t stand them, just think of it as training your ability to be humble (and not punch someone).

4. talk to your professors. they’re not as bad as you think they are.

5. seriously, go to their consultation hours when you think you’re failing. 

1. TAKE NOTES. cannot emphasize this enough. don’t rely on anyone to take your notes for you; it’s your education, it’s time you take responsibility for it.

2. sit in front of class if you believe you’ll get distracted if you sit in the back. 

3. talk to your seatmate! you’ll need them when you get sick and can’t come to class.

4. again, TAKE NOTES. don’t photograph the slide. write that shit down, or type it if you don’t want to write. bottom line, don’t picture it. 

5. revise, revise, revise. if you want to understand the material, a good way to go about it is to revise your notes in a way YOU can understand.

having fun/relationships
1. have fun! i was too stressed when I was a freshman all because I focused too much on getting 4.0s. It’s possible to get 4.0s and still have fun! having fun doesn’t need to be about drinking (although if it is, then stay safe doing it!) it could be reading a book or hanging out with your friends, whatever works for you and keeps your mind off school for awhile.

2. it’s okay to have crushes! they could be your inspiration (but don’t let them be your distraction)

3. talk to that cute guy you’ve been classmates with ever since February who you can’t stop looking at. you’ve got nothing to lose.

4. relationships are a good source of support, love and care but pls don’t forget your friends.

5. learn how to have fun, and college will be easier. 

Reminder: having fun does not equal to slacking off.

I guess that’s it! If you guys want more tips/advice/academic or college realted, I can write more or you can just hit up my ask! 

Do's and Don't's for helping someone through a PTSD flashback!

So personally I have PTSD. Everyone has different coping skills and ways of getting through their flashbacks, and these are some of the things that help me, personally. Feel free to add anything you think night be helpful and feel free to reblog to help those who also struggle with this horrible mental illness.

*separate the person from a large group. Large groups personally make everything worse. Get them to a quiet, secluded area as quickly and as quietly as you can, it will decrease anxiety so fast.

*give the person an ice cube to hold. The cold is painful enough that it brings the oersons senses back to reality and out of their flashback, but it isn’t too damaging.

*talk to the person,if they are willing, about what they are seeing. Remind that person in soft and quiet tones that you are not their abuser, and that they are safe.

*ask for permission before you touch them!!! Personally if someone I don’t know touches me when I’m having a flashback I get so much worse. If I haven’t given you permission to touch me DO NOT DO IT!

*give the person a distraction. Be it a quiet cartoon, soft classical music. Something calming and not too overstimulating.


*DON’T speak in a loud voice. This makes us think you are angry, or upset that we are having an episode. It will make an even worse and I will find the closest thing to hide under.

*DON’T raise your hands or move too quickly. My biggest fear during an episode is that I’m going to be hit so seeing raised arms or fast movements will scare me really badly.

*DON’T tell the person that it’s all in their head. This is not only redundant but it makes us feel even stupider and more vulnerable.

*DON’T panic yourself. I know that helping us through our episode can be stressful but please do not panic. It will set us off even harder. I feel more vulnerable and susceptible to others emotions and if you panic, I will too.

Just some useful stuff that personally helps me. As I said feel free to add to this or reblog it to maybe help someone else. C:

tbh I’ve been thinking about it and I think the lack of irl gay spaces especially ones just for women means that we never really interactions between gay women taking place…as a result they gain a kind of mythical status where we have thousands of girls on here wishing for girlfriends but with no clue about how to actually get one…girls who match on dating sites and never talk or girls who clearly like each other but never do anything about it…heterosexual relationships are so prevalent in our society that it’s so easy to observe and model romantic behaviours: if not from your parents than from your friends or from reading tips in magazines or books or movies or tv shows and even music. But because good wlw representation is essentially zero, all we really have to go off of is the support and example of older women, and the lack of women only LGBT spaces (like bookstores or music festivals or dances) means that we all just have to guess on everything and I think that’s a huge factor in why lesbians in particular feel so alone

reminder that you’re constantly growing as a writer and it doesn’t matter if you have low confidence in your writing, you are still valid as a writer and I hope one day you have the courage to share a part of your world with the rest of us

and even if you don’t, know that i’m still proud of you and how hard you’re trying

50 life lessons:
1. Happiness is a mood, not a destination
2. If you spend every day wishing and wondering you will only look back on your life and wish and wonder
3. That cookie won’t kill you
4. Neither will that shot of tequila
5. Everything in moderation
6. Exercise will always put you in a better mood
7. A hot shower or a long nap can cure anything
8. Spend days with the people you love
9. Tell people how you feel
10. Never give up on a dream
11. That guy/girl was not your soulmate , soulmates don’t leave you laying in your own tears alone
12. Once a cheater always a cheater
13. People do change
14. But sometimes they just become better liars
15. Jumping into a cold pool on a hot summer day is an amazing thing
16. Wear that bikini, wear that red lipstick, wear whatever the hell you want
17. So what if your thighs jiggle?
18. Never let someone else decide your life for you
19. Don’t have sex with someone you would not want to raise a kid with
20. Buying condoms is less embarrassing than buying a pregnancy test
21. You can always order yourself flowers and buy yourself chocolate
22. Jump off cliffs, go skydiving, make sure you at least feel that thrill once
23. Do not let winter cause you to be lazy and sad
24. Sometimes all you need is to clean and organize things to feel like it’s all back in place
25. Your GPA isn’t the most important thing in your life
26. It is important though, study, focus, but never put your education over your physical well being
27. Go to the doctor and dentist
28. Listen to your gut, it really knows what is best for you
29. Always talk to somebody on the phone while walking alone at night
30. Sometimes all you need to do is laugh at your mistakes and move on
31. Find your comfort food
32. Never be afraid to go home
33. If you are, find a new home
34. Life is not a puzzle, the pieces will never fit perfectly but isn’t that the point?
35. Never dull your enthusiasm
37. Educate yourself on current events, from more than one source
38. Wear sweatpants or dress up, your significant other shouldn’t care what you are wearing
39. Sometimes you just have to act like a child
40. Go to carnivals, go camping, have adventures
41. Go to as many festivals and concerts as possible
42. Learn how to cook simple meals
43. You won’t always have someone there, learn how to do things on your own
44. Treat animals with the respect they deserve
45. Believe in whatever religion you like or don’t, but do not shove your beliefs on others
46. Watch as many movies as you can
47. Music is the gateway to the souls
48. Summer nights with friends are always the best
49. True friends aren’t always true friends, if they talk gossip with you they will talk gossip about you
50. Always smile, always love, never judge, and never dull your passions

artsythenintendofreak  asked:

Hi, I'm an aspiring animator, and I wanted to thank you for being such an inspiration for me. Your art is fantastic, and I enjoy your style very much. Do you have any tips for poses? I try and practice, but the more dynamic poses end up looking awkward or stiff. Your stuff always looks so natural and flows nicely.

hello! oh wow thank you very much! Well, i’ve had this same question sent in to me a lot of times now, and I always say the same thing: do lifedrawing. Draw people around you, carry around a small little sketchbook and sketch people in the subway, in the restaurant, in the park! (do it without being creepy tho haha) 

When you do this, you’ll get a gist as to why people look the way they do and how they move etc. (try to do this everyday! go out, and do maybe 10-15 quick sketches. continue for a month and you’ll really see the change)

When you practice, try not to bother yourself with details first! instead, focus on shapes. this will not only help you with poses but also help you learn to draw faster! (2 for the price of 1!!!!) and when i say shapes, i mean think in 3d and start to sort of….sculp it.

Do different poses from normal everyday ones to the dynamic ones. (also, don’t take normal boring poses for granted!) then once you’ve gotten a hang of it, you can start drawing in characters!

you can see i didn’t follow the lines strictly from the original sketch to suit the characters’ style, but it still has the essence of that pose!

be loose! lines and shapes are your best friends! start practicing and you’ll soon find that poses are super fun and addicting to do!

how to spot urban witches (from experience)

  • their bag and pockets are filled with literally so many stones i swear how the heck??
  • they’ll have dates in the closest forest because its super witchy
  • rockin that witchy fashion, probably wearing a lot of black with crystal necklaces and maybe a wide brim hat. slay.
  • lil doodles up their arms of sigils
  • literal grafitti of runes around their neighbourhood, probably done by them or a friend
  • ‘wanna see this pic of a ghost i caught on camera?’
  • they ask so many philosophical questions like what happens after death its so intense
  • maybe wearing a pentagram but not always
  • on the whole, they love animals so so much
  • halloween is their fave holiday

“Dupain” wasn’t enough of a pun for me so I present to you the new power couple in paris: hon hon hon et ma baguette

Dad Tips from DD:ADDS
  • Dad Tip #1: Don't forget to floss everyday
  • Dad Tip #2: It's never too early to invest in a personal IRA
  • Dad Tip #3: Start building creidt as early as possible
  • Dad Tip #4: Stand up for yourself - don't let anyone disrespect you
  • Dad Tip #5: Everyone needs to know how to use power tools
  • Dad Tip #6: Don't trust anyone who likes their meat well done
  • Dad Tip #7: LaserDisc is clearly the superior video format
  • Dad Tip #8: Drink a full glass of water in the morning to help wake up
  • Dad Tip #9: Don't use metal utensils on nonstick frying pans
  • Dad Tip #10: If you're parking uphill, be sure to turn your tires toward the street
  • Dad Tip #11: It's rude to ask people about their mysterious hand tattoos
  • Dad Tip #12: Moving pictures is hands down the best Rush album
  • Dad Tip #13: Buy quality, not quantity
  • Dad Tip #14: Shave with the grain
  • Dad Tip #15: You always have time for a beer with your buds
  • Dad Tip #16: Always use a coat of wax after wash
  • Dad Tip #17: Nothing can beat reading in print.
  • Dad Tip #18: Always carry a pocket knife
  • Dad Tip #19: Use your hips when throwing
  • Dad Tip #20: Keep your word
  • Dad Tip #21: Eat a lot of broccoli
  • Dad Tip #22: Drinking too much water can cause water intoxication
  • Dad Tip #23: Take care of your health while you're still young
  • Dad Tip #24: Always help a friend in need.
  • Dad Tip #25: Drink plenty of water
  • Dad Tip #26: Exercise regularly and you'll stay healthy!
  • Dad Tip #27: Don't eat too close to your bedtime
  • Dad Tip #28: Always check the card reader at ATMs before you swipe
  • Dad Tip #29: Medicine is not always the best medicine
  • Dad Tip #30: Always bring a war chest
  • Dad Tip #31: You're young, you have your health, now is the time to take risks
  • Dad Tip #32: You can't beat the whammy bar
  • Dad Tip #33: The solo from Kid Charlemagne is the greatest guitar solo ever recorded
  • Dad Tip #34: Peter Weller actually has a PHD in history
  • Dad Tip #35: It's called masking tape for a reason
  • Dad Tip #36: Trust no one
  • Dad Tip #37: If you press the ignition too long you'll just flood the engine
  • Dad Tip #38: The extended cut is the only cut worth watching
  • Dad Tip #39: They really stepped up the production value for Episode V
  • Dad Tip #40: Managing debt is just part of being an adult
  • Dad Tip #41: Run through the finish line
  • Dad Tip #42: What you do, when you don't have to, will determine where you'll be when you can't help it
  • Dad Tip #43: When lifting weights, use proper form and a full range of motion
  • Dad Tip #44: Gas is cheaper in the suburbs
  • Dad Tip #45: Do what you love and the money will come
  • Dad Tip #46: Do it once, do it right
  • Dad Tip #47: Don't skip the corners
  • Dad Tip #48: Eat plenty of carbs the night before a big game
  • Dad Tip #49: If the police are driving behind you, don't give them probable cause to pull you over
  • Dad Tip #50: Try to drive in a way where you never have to use your brakes
  • Dad Tip #51: You can save bookmarks directly to your desktop
  • Dad Tip #52: A bird in the hand is better than a bird in the eye.
  • Dad Tip #53: Pet every dog.
  • Dad Tip #54: Have you ever read Rich Dad Poor Dad?
  • Dad Tip #55: Liquor beforee beef, you're in the clear
  • Dad Tip #56: Go ask your mother
  • Dad Tip #57: If life gives you lemons, parsley, onions, and eggs... make a really nice omelet
  • Dad Tip #58: Practice makes permanent.
  • Dad Tip #59: First is the worst, second is the best, third is the one with the hairiest chest
  • Dad Tip #60: Never give up, never remember
  • Dad Tip #61: That quirky lab assistant from NCIS just reminds me of you
  • Dad Tip #62: Whistle while you work
  • Dad Tip #63: Please remember to call us once in a while
  • Dad Tip #64: Get whatever job you want, just make sure it includes health insurance
  • Dad Tip #65: grow your own vegetables. It's cheaper, I think
  • Dad Tip #66: It's okay if you don't come in first, just make sure you have health insurance
  • Dad Tip #67: Try to exercise regularly
  • Dad Tip #68: Sleep is important! Make sure you're getting enough.
  • Dad Tip #69: It's okay to cry if you're sad
  • Dad Tip #70: Make sure to sweep under your tent so you don't sleep on rocks
  • Dad Tip #71: Good tire pressure is essential to optimal mileage
  • Dad Tip #72: The only acceptable time and place for decaf coffee is never and in the trash
  • Dad Tip #73: When changing a tire, make sure to tighten the bolts in a starfish pattern
  • Dad Tip #74: Anyone who tells you that a drink isn't manly has never known heartache
  • Dad Tip #75: Call someone if you're thinking about them. They probably want to hear from you.
  • Dad Tip #76: If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all
  • Dad Tip #77: Don't smoke
  • Dad Tip #78: Try not to make assumptions about people
  • Dad Tip #79: Don't trust gas station egg sandwiches
  • Dad Tip #81: It's better to be early than latE
  • Dad Tip #82: Eat a balance meal everyday that includes vegetables, fruit and proteins
  • Dad Tip #83: Minimize eating fried foods, candy, and sweets
  • Dad Tip #84: Treat people better than they treat you
  • Dad Tip #85: Be generous and kind to everyone
  • Dad Tip #85: Be generous and kind to everyone
  • Dad Tip #86: Always try your best at everything
  • Dad Tip #87: Spend less money than you make
  • Dad Tip #88: Pay your bills early
  • Dad Tip #89: Look at situations positively
  • Dad Tip #90: Always try to make others around you happy
  • Dad Tip #91: Smile as often as you can, it will make others around you feel more comfortable
  • Dad Tip #92: You're never too busy or important to be kind to others
Enemies Turned Lovers Prompts

This was not requested, but I made another prompts list called Best Friends Turned Lovers which you can check out if you like, and I felt like compiling some of my personal favorites from the enemies turned lovers trope as well. I hope these inspire you!

  1. “It’s hard to remember we aren’t in a competition anymore.” 
  2. “Do we like…hold hands now?”
  3. “Sorry, this is just really different from our constant arguing.” 
  4. “I didn’t ever think we’d be here, like this.”
  5. Write about an angel being held captive in hell who falls in love with a demon.
  6. “I don’t fall in love with people very often, I just can’t believe it was you. Out of everyone, you just had to steal my heart. That’s very rude, you know, to steal?” 
  7. An angel sent to destroy the one prophesied to bring the world’s destruction falls in love with them instead.
  8. Person A is from a rich family, intelligent and has a sharp tongue. One day, they snuck out to the poor district, curious. They met Person B, strong and independent, who clearly hates the people of the rich district. Not knowing Person A’s real identity, they both became fast friends, running around on top of rooftops at night, stealing breads from vendors only to give them to the beggars and telling each other stories while laying side by side in the flower meadow.
  9. “I keep forgetting that we got over this ages ago.”
  10. “Isn’t it strange to think that just a while back, we were always fighting?”
  11. “I don’t even remember why were fighting.”
  12. “We still have issues to work around, but we’ll get over it.”
  13. “I’m trying to decide if this thing I did is incredibly stupid or…”“What happened? What did you do?”“Well…I fell in love with you.”
  14. “You know nothing about me.”“Oh, but I do. I know you want adventure, that’s why you’re here standing in front of me. You want to rebel like everyone else. You want mystery in your life, passion, romance… and maybe even a little danger.”
  15. “This should be against some sort of rule.”
  16. “How could this happen? They’re so…so pure. Ugh.”
  17. “They’re kind to everyone, even me. I guess that was my weakness all along.”
  18. “All I ever wanted was for someone to respect me. When they did exactly that, I knew I was doomed.” 
  19. “Please don’t say you love me.” 
  20. “You know I can’t say it, but surely you understand how I feel?”

Sources x x x x x x x x x x 

If you use one or more of these for a story, I would be delighted to read it! Please don’t hesitate to send your writing to me:)

Request a prompt list/writing advice/playlist/study help post here

⭐️social life glo ups⭐️

Okay so here are my tips for an amazing social life, things that I learned over the years. Below all of these is a lil backstory on how I figured all this out. Thanks for 500 followers, and thanks for believing in me.

Without further ado, here are my SOCIAL LIFE GLO UP TIPS.

1. START FRESH: for me this was moving to a new school. If you don’t want this kind of crazy extreme catalyst, this simply means start over. Forget all of those embarrassing things of the past haunting you, they’re just dragging you down. Close your eyes and remember that now, these things are irrelevant.

2. DON’T BE AFRAID TO REACH OUT: to the person a year older to you, the opposite gender, the opposite friend group. Your best friend can come in the most unexpected place, they can sit next to you in geometry, they can be the football player in your art class that is only there for the credit. This is especially true for me, I used to hang out with the quirky art kids, and it turns out that those people and I didn’t mesh well, so I’ve moved on to people who appreciate memes even more than I do lol

3. APPEARANCES *DO* MATTER: it sucks, but it’s the truth. You don’t need to look like a model but you NEED to take hygiene and clothing into consideration. For all of middle school I was cringey, I wore flannels and sweatpants and no bra even though I had big boobs. I didn’t do my brows or wear deodorant or wash my hair, hunty I was gross. Now, I do all of those things and more. I work so so hard to present a good image of myself and even though it’s exhausting, it’s worth it.

4. FRIENDS: Shitty friends deserve each other, if you aren’t shitty, you’re better than them. The instant a friend betrays your trust or hurts you, you need to let them go. It doesn’t matter if you knew them for six months or six years, LET THEM GO. I haven’t spoken to my old town friends in ages, and good riddance to them. Don’t be mean, just cut off all contact with them because they aren’t worth it. It’ll be hard. I still feel this deep resentment toward these people and I want to block their numbers and tell them to go and die and whatever but this ties into step one. LET THEM GO. they aren’t worth it.

That’s basically it. I’m happy. But here’s the backstory if you’re feelin up to it.

For all of middle school, I had no social life. All of these people around me had their 1,000 followers on Instagram, their meaningless middle school relationships, and their tight-knit friend group. Meanwhile, I was only in destructive friendships with people who would go out of their way to exclude me from plans, screw me over, and treat me like I was competition.

I grew up in a small town, only 100 kids per grade, and everyone knew each other because their parents meddled in their social lives. Grades were dependent on how active mothers were in the PTSA, your future dependent on how much money your father made per year. Sounds horrible, sounds antifeminist and wrong (which it is), but it was how the town was when I moved there in kindergarten, it’s the same thing now.

Surrounding me were skinny, blonde, white girls with big boobs and Invisalign, and I was a curvy, Puerto Rican girl with uncontrollable curly hair, bad acne, and no real friendships. I don’t think that, in the ten years I lived there, I had a single true friend. Instead, I had people who constantly put me down, treated me horribly, and lied to me. These people were also misfits, they were the artsy crew, the writers-as was I. Not to brag or anything, but for years I was an excellent writer, and countless times my friend would take my ideas and post them on her Tumblr for reblogs, and would take full credit. She never asked me first. People would copy my homework because I was smart, people would borrow my clothes because my mom would find them in old nifty places and they would never give them back. That was my life.

In the sixth grade I developed an eating disorder and started self harming and I was exactly like those rawr xd memes you see and for the rest of middle school I really did struggle with crippling depression. Not a single friend came to my aid in this horrible time, even though they were happy with each other and could feel something other than sadness they didn’t know that I was about to jump in front of traffic on my way home.

Recently, my family reached a point where we needed a bigger house and a better work commute so we packed our bags and moved more upstate. I was terrified, I thought my life was over and I would be this misanthrope thrown into a new school. I was wrong. This move was the best thing that ever happened to me, and now I have a lot of friends, genuine happiness, and a life I’d never take away from myself.

The 6 stages of friendship for writers

How do you write friendship? How do you make it realistic? How do you know it’s time to unlock their secret sharing and mutual trust? There are no rule for that, but here goes a small guide to help you write and develop a friendship.

But, before anything, this guide is not a rule, just an example.

Stage 1: For now, they share nothing but the current location, event or activity that brought them together, for example, work, school, sport, rock concert, a zombie apocalypse… They talk mostly about the location, event or activity. They also have a first impression of each other, sometimes (most of the time) a very negative first impression. So, in stage 1 we have small-talk, first impression and one thing in common. 

Originally posted by preciousjonathanbyers

Stage 2: They find something else in common, maybe both characters love horror movies, or paintball, or a song in particular. Maybe they have the same goals and duties. They will talk about it all the time. First activities might start as well, like eating together, walking home together, taking the same bus. The first impression will soften. So, in stage 2 we have common interests, changing first impression and enjoying the company.

Originally posted by milliebrowngifs

Stage 3: After sharing their interests, and bonding, trust will start to set in. With trust comes sharing problems. People don’t usually open up their secrets out of nowhere. They usually talk about their problems, they ask for help or advice. Secrets come in the shape of problems. The more characters help each other, the faster their relationship will grow. They might share a few memories, family issues, and important information. Nicknames and inside jokes might appear as well. So, in stage 3 we have helping, problems solving, nicknames and a few memories.

Originally posted by strangerthingscentral

Stage 4: This is the stage in which friends step up from being a good listener to being the voice of reason. They will care for each other and will speak the truth even when the other person doesn’t want to hear it. They are taking care of each other. They will hurt when the other person is in pain. They will cry. They will open their minds and soul. So, in stage 4, friends will become more like a family.

Originally posted by charleseriks

Stage 5: Friends will enter your house, open your fridge, take your food, meet your family members, sleep over. Not only problems, they share secrets as well. The other person is fully trusted. So, in stage 5 we have a more intimate approach regarding space and trust. This is the best friends forever stage.  

Originally posted by winter-barnes

Stage 6: Beyond best friends, they can read each other’s feelings by looking at their eyes. No words needed. They can read each other’s movements, desires, fears, expressions, voice tones, intentions, reactions… So, in stage 6, magic happens. Their souls are connected somehow. They need the other person’s company. This friendship will hardly be broken.  

Originally posted by mike-wheeler