While writing this reflection, my fiancé sat across the room indulging in some acrylic painting. Occasionally, I asked him for specific incidences that I could reference, but he came up empty on ideas and instead responded with “Well I don’t know. Everything is just natural for us, so nothing stands out.” The best way to describe our relationship is that it’s natural. Naturally, we adapted to college life. Naturally, we moved in together with ease. And naturally, we decided to spend the rest of our lives together.
—  Reflection for a sociology course
What I hope I said when I proposed

Today is September 19th. I am posting this October 11th.

I am writing out some things I hope I was able to cover when I asked Kaitlyn ( strivingformediocracy ) to marry me.

I knew when I first met you when you moved to Mulvane that you were some one incredibly special. I remember Madi Cox asking me a few week later who I had a crush on and I blushed and said Kaitlyn. Third Grade was when that was. You were able to light a spark in my heart in third grade.

I am not a super religious person,but God put you in my life for a reason,I don’t know what I did to deserve some one like you but I know I would do whatever it was again a million times if I knew you would be in my life.

In retrospect we are still young,but I don’t care,I realize about a year ago that things were solidified when I stopped thinking about ‘what will I do when…’ And began thinking about ‘what will WE do when…’

I don’t know what I am going to do in a year. Or what to do for a career. I don’t know where I’m going to live or how long I am going to live for,hopefully til 3005. The only thing I know for sure is that I want you by my side til 3005.

I want make you smile when you are sad.

I want to see more concerts than we have money with you.

I want to see the cardinals play in a World Series game and you are sitting next to me in the nose bleed seats because that’s all we can afford with my student loans putting us in debt.

I secretly always have wanted the high school love story and by God we are the prime example.

We don’t know when we will get married.

We don’t know when we can live together.

But there is something we can do right now.

Kaitlyn Ashley Gundlach, whether you get a career or your dream Audi,whether you are sick or healthy, I don’t want to miss a thing. I want you to be a Freund forever.

Will you marry me?

About a week ago I completed one of my new year’s goals.

I got a tattoo!

Life’s a journey, not a destination. is now a part of my body

Ever since I could remember I have been obsessed with those lyrics from Aerosmith’s “Amazing”.

When I was in middle school I wrote that phrase on my mirror so I could look at it every morning. Aerosmith has gotten me through some dark times in my life; body insecurity, anxiety, depression, suicidal phases, etc. I am forever in debt to music for keeping my alive to be where I am at today.

I got this tattoo for two reasons. One, I wanted to have the lyrics as a constant reminder to keep moving on, as the next line in the song states “I just can’t tell just what tomorrow brings”

And the second reason is I am finally happy in my body. I have battled being extremely underweight and border-line anorexia in middle school and high school to finally being the correct body weight. I have accepted my paleness and my bigger than average nose. I am finally taking control of my body and being comfortable in it.

Thanks for reading.

P.S. Anyone wanting to ask about my experience getting the tattoo or anything else I talked about in this post, feel free to message me.