Why do I need to call myself an ex-muslim?

There are two parallel roads Muslims usually take when the horrendous topic of ex-muslims comes up

“You don’t like islam? Fine whatever, that’s your life, but why do you have to make such a big deal out of it?”


“How can you even call yourself an ex-muslim. There’s no such thing as an ex-muslim, you were never muslim to begin with”

Well let me break it down for you

I choose to call myself an ex-Muslim because leaving a system of living that is culturally, morally, and socially drenched with Islam is fucking difficult.

I choose to call myself an ex-muslim because -for many people- I don’t seem to exist. My reasoning for leaving and experiences are apparently invalid, and that my very personhood is negotiated as soon as it becomes apparent that I don’t share the beliefs of mainstream muslims.

I need to call myself an ex-muslim to make it clear that someone who is born into islam can leave islam, that someone born into a muslim family doesn’t have to conform to so called family values.

And most importantly, I call myself an ex muslim because i want to represent the opportuity for a meaningful life after leaving a system of thought that convinced me for so many years that everything unrelated to a specific definition of allah is meaningless.

Freethinking =/= conspiracy theories; skepticism =/= denialism.

Tentatively believe only that for which verifiable evidence exists. Maintain some skeptical perspective- don’t just reject the mainstream story, for its own sake.

Let’s be bound by some rules of logic and the preponderance of the evidence. As the saying goes: Good to have an open mind, but not so open your brain falls out. A thinker with no methodology or awareness of biases and fallacies is as free as a boat with no rudder.


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My own unschooling experience.

Short or Tall

I’m Whiskey and you’re Neat
Not tidy and together , no high roller to hide behind but that’s your appeal
Just take a seat and pour myself onto any surface you hover
Your orderly mannerisms and efforts to make no effort gather me round you fast
I’m Whiskey and your Neat
Not like the napkin stuck to my punchline or the time it took to get there. You balance both outcomes so cooly. I don’t even miss the crutch of ice clanking to break up my codependency .

I’m whiskey and your Neat.

And just like that

You’re gone again.
I’m left with chores and tidying and silence.
I’ve turned on the shows you hate, my only solace,
Like a rebellious tantrum because now you’re gone
Now I can watch them.

I act as though I need to punish you for leaving -
Like you had any say.

I’ve made a list of things to do
Things to check off as I complete them
Things to help me pretend I’m keeping it together
When I’m really just falling apart.

I need to eat something. I need a drink.
Maybe whisky will help me forget the
Feel of your body held against me, your hands caressing my skin.
I can’t bring myself to find food, anyhow.

Blinking back tears and holding myself still to keep
from shaking with remorse for your departure,
I’m reminded once again that I’m landlocked,
While my ocean crosses an ocean once again.

The Seen-Unseen

We went to see some poets tonight

on the south side in the

“little village” neighbor



on ward we’d entangle

the night in those


Unspoken, as were we just as

seamlessly risin’

upwards’ towards some obscure Logas

I heard a’ calling-(first came ourselves)

though slow as paint thats stone dry

and stilla’


on down ‘en

around an 'round so it’d bound us

downwards’ to a sound sense of

our senses

tho in no sense: would we feel our feet

on the ground here


Know, this wasn’t always so…

Oh no.

much less so nor twasn’t true in

our heads where just that remaining

mess sat like a “welcome home” mat

made of somebody else’s trash

with a little newspaper ad

about last night that now read:

“Alcohol poison?”



through each brand newly knighted still_

born cities white’d lights

stood there tall

and frozen

in time above us

silent & brimming -

through a 2 way window

sill while a new day

with a new view

Emerged from a coal black

horizons’ - where a bright

skies blue- one moment…elapsed, then

passed 'way in 'midst within that

twilight of hues’:

All til henceforth the blur had begot

us thee



where once there had

been; if, but for a

mere moment-




whaddup-cuz  asked:

okay so I have a question. I'm not Christian, I know that. I also know I'm not an atheist. I believe there is a higher power, just not what the bible says. I don't really fit in to any of the agnostic categories, so where do you think I fit in? if you don't know that's fine I'm just curious

Hmmmm….. sounds like you might be a deist!

Why do you believe in a “higher power”?  Are you imagining a god of some sort that does supernatural things?