I have a new hobby where I drive through town with my windows rolled down blasting ice cream truck music. And I drive away as I watch children frantically running out, looking for the ice cream truck, but sadly discovering there to be none. I use this as a metaphor to teach them about life:
You may hear an ice cream truck, you may look for an ice cream truck, but there is no ice cream truck. There’s only disappointment.

tovelinen asked:

Could you do 11, please?

11. partners in crime au

Derek rolls over with a groan when his phone blares to life, the specifically set tune demanding his attention when he’d usually just shut off the ringer and bury himself back under his pillow.

  “What?” he asks, forcing his voice to lilt at the end so that it sounds like a question rather than an aggressive statement.

  “Derek–shit, oh, fuck–” Stiles’ breathing is heavy and Derek’s eyes snap open.

  “Stiles, it’s three in the morning, I don’t think now’s the best time for–”

  “Shut up, shut up, shut up,” Stiles says frantically. “I’m not–that’s not why I’m calling–I’m in trouble. I’m in trouble, because I tripped a silent fucking alarm and I think they have dogs? I’m kind of–shit!” There’s a bark in the background and a sound like Stiles has just full-body collided with something. “Okay, they definitely have dogs.”

Keep reading

Hide finds a book in Kaneki’s room and thinking it is one of his novels, he curiously opens it. Except there is a sketch of Hide with hearts all around it and he slams it shut. He spends the rest of the day fidgeting before admitting to Kaneki he saw it and apologizes frantically. They both flush and Hide hesitantly reaches for Kaneki’s hand, telling him he feels the same way.

anonymous asked:

I have a question!! I vaguely remember that moments before Rose entered the game, she noticed that many other people were playing Sburb at the moment, which caused meteors to frantically rain on Earth, destroying it. Is it safe to assume that there might be other humans who managed to enter the medium but in other sessions, unconnected to that of our 8 main human kids and, therefore, unbeknownst to them?

Yes, although based on the walkthroughs written by others playing the game a lot of them never entered.

I did a simple spell a few days ago because I’m frantically looking for a job, and I’d really like to think it worked.

I’ve NEVER had much luck with jobs, no matter how hard I try, how professional I am, etc.

I’ve got three interviews in one week and this is the first time that’s ever happened.

If you’re in the same boat and need help, here’s something easy for you to try:

On a whole bay leaf, write what you want in either a black or silver marker (“job”, “work”, “ career”, what have you). Take it outside and burn it while letting the ashes float away. That’s it! I might also suggest, if you’re really desperate, carrying a piece of aventurine in your pocket while going to any potential job interviews, as the stone is known to bring luck regarding jobs and finances.

Good luck and happy witching!

Requested by esperjester

Pairing: Shizuo/Izaya
Theme: au!grocery stores

“I need six gallons of milk!!”


Straightening, Izaya continued to give the blond man a strange look.

“…What?” he asked, echoing his previous thought.

“I need six gallons of milk!” he explained again, voice frantic and hair messy from running. “I only see three!”

“There’s probably more in the back,” Izaya sighed, crossing his arms. “Why don’t you just take these three?”

“Because I need six!”

“There are plenty of low fat and skim.”


Amusement beginning to turn into annoyance, Izaya kept staring at him for a few minutes before sighing, mumbling ‘wait a moment.’ He turned and disappeared into the back, coming out again with three gallons of what he saw in the guy’s cart. Setting them down, he looked up tiredly. “Satisfied?”

He stared and then looked back to Izaya. “How many more of these do you have in the back?”

“…More than you could afford to buy.”

Try me.”

“…Why are you getting so defensive over how many gallons of milk you can buy…?”

Later, Izaya found out that the blond had made a bet with someone as to how long he could stay in his apartment without leaving, so he was stocking up.

The most amusing part was that this was the person he’d been arguing with on an online forum all week, their fight ending with:

“You can’t stay in your room for two weeks without leaving, you idiot.”

Hey Dad.  It’s me.

I was just thinking about you this morning…Thought I’d come out and say hello.

TODAY IS thewittyarsonist‘s birthday and I’ve been running frantically around for the past three days trying to decide what to draw.  I re-read all of her comic Gravity Falls 1984, which inspired me to do a lil picture of Lex.  He may be a Schrodinger’s oc, but I love everything you’ve put into him.  You’re creative and daring and you aren’t afraid to express.  Those are some of the MANY things I admire about you, Witty. SO HAPPY BIRTHDAY AND I HOPE YOU LIKE THIS LITTLE..THING I MADE..BONUS UNDER THE CUT

Keep reading

Person: So what did you think about Ant-Man? 

Me: HaHA, It’s so stupi— *trips* *hundreds of thousands of photos of Scott Lang pour out of jacket* W-what no, who cares about-I, uh- these aren’t mine I’m just *gathering them up while frantically sweating* listen, I just listen fuck *thousands of pictures of Scott scatter across the floor* shit, fuck I’m holding them for— just listen.

twelve: clara oswald??? nah what a control freak what a — [trips] [hundreds of thousands of photos of clara spill out of jacket] w-what a bossy egomaniac i these aren’t mine I’m just [gathering them up frantically sweating] listen I just listen fuck [thousands of pictures of clara scatter across the floor] shit fuck I’m holding them for a friend just listen LISTEN

Meet the Squad (Omaha)

Requests are open! 
Anon requested: Hey I was wondering if you could do an imagine where y/n lives with Nate and Sammy in their apartment and is dating Nate and her parents come out and visit from her hometown and like Sammy,gilinsky,swazz, and Johnson show up and they all just get to know each other? Sorry if it’s a lot! I absolutely love your writing btw❤️

I hope you enjoy!! It’s longer, but definitely something I’m proud of. and thank you so much! xx 

“Something smells good in here!” Your boyfriend, Nate, called as he entered the kitchen. We had been living together for almost 2 months, before my parents called last week, asking to meet him. Reasonable enough, since we’ve dated for a year without them demanding to meet him. until now, obviously. I were frantically slaving in the kitchen, trying to cook a decent dinner of chicken, spaghetti, and fruit salad on the side. Cooking was normally fun for ,e, but tonight I were nervous, making the task much more difficult. Nate made his way over to where I was standing, in front of the stove, and snaked his arms around your waist, resting his head on your shoulder. 

“Calm down y/n, you’re going to be fine. From what I’ve heard from you, they’re pretty chill parents. If I’m not worried, then you shouldn’t be either,” he mumbled against my skin, pressing soft kisses here and there. 

I sighed in relief, feeling almost at peace. I turned to face him, before pushing my lips gently against his. “I love you,” I mumbled against his lips. 

“And I love you, lil mama. Now, let me clean up and get ready. I want to make a good first impression,” he said as he winked at me. 

I grinned like a mad idiot and turned back to the pot of sauce and continued stirring before hearing the door open. Turning back around, I glanced at the 4 boys who just entered the living area. They were all dressed in nice shirts and khakis, not too different than what they normally wear when we go out together. 

“y/n!” they yelled before running over to me and hugging me. I hugged each of them back, greeting them with a smile. 

I moved out to LA when I started attending the college of UCLA, and ended up meeting all of the boys at a frat party. Yeah, I know its quite a sketchy place to meet somebody, especially a group of 4 random guys, but we hit it off right away. They were quick to show me around town, and I was very lucky to have met them. Soon enough, our alliance quickly blossomed into a friendship that felt like it had been there for all of my life. They were all sweethearts, and I loved them all to death. (even though they are all rowdy af, you learn to deal with it) 

“So are you nervous? Your parents meeting Nate and everything? Like this is a big deal and shit, what if something goes wrong?” Sammy asked. 

My face morphed into a nervous state, again, and I looked around manically. 

“Shut up Wilk,” Johnson said before walking over to my side and rubbing my back, “It’s going to be okay.” 

“Yeah y/n, we’re here for you. I’m sure nothing will happen, and if worst comes to worst, we’ll hold them up with some killer jokes and stories.” Gilinsky reassured me. 

I laughed. “Thanks guys, I truly appreciate this. Having you guys here will make me feel more comfortable.” 

“That’s what I like to hear!” Swazz said before sauntering over to the strained pasta and placing a noodle into his mouth. We all laughed, before I took a look at the clock and gasped. 7:30 

“Shit, my parents are coming at 8 and I haven’t even gotten dressed! Do you think you guys could pull off the rest of the cooking? All you have to do is put the sauce on the noodles, and put the cut-up-fruit in a bowl. I already took out the chicken and set the table so you’re fine there,” I stated. 

“We’ve got it y/n, don’t you worry,” Gilinksy said, getting to work in the kitchen.

“Thanks so much guys,” I yelled as I ran down the hallway and into my shared room with Nate.  

“Hell yeah, I’ve always wanted to be a chef” I heard Sammy say from the kitchen. I giggled to myself before pulling on a simple white dress with a denim jacket on top, rolling up the sleeves. Adding a few rings and the necklace that Nate gave me for our 1 year anniversary, I also swiped on some makeup (nothing too drastic), before heading back downstairs to see Nate on the couch. 

“You look gorgeous, y/n.” He said, walking over to where I was to kiss me. Kissing him back, I blushed, before peeping into the kitchen to see that everything was placed neatly on the table. The Jacks, Swazz, and Sammy all stood off to the side proudly, admiring their finished work. 

“Guys, this is perfect. I can’t believe you pulled that off,” I thanked, admiring the food that lay on the table, before hugging each one of them again. Right on cue, the doorbell rang, signifying the one moment that I had been both dreading, and excited for. 

My parents were here. 

Taking a deep breath and interlocking fingers with Nate, I walked over to the main entrance and swung the door open to reveal my mom and dad. 

“Y/n!” They exclaimed as they embraced me in one of the tightest hugs ever. Letting go of Nate’s hand, I savored the group hug, rocking back and forth with them. “Its so good to see you!” My mom squealed.

“I missed you mom, its good to see you too.” Moving aside to allow them to enter the apartment, the 5 boys all came into view clearly. 

“Who are these boys, y/n?” my dad asked. 

“This is Jack, Jack, John, and Sam,” I gestured to each boy, going down the row. They each shook hands with my parents and smiled, while my parents looked at me with a sense of approval. 

Nicely done, y/n, only one more to go. you thought. 

“And who is this young fellow?” my dad asked again. 

“Mom, Dad, This is Nate Maloley, my boyfriend,” I introduced. 

“It’s so great to meet sir,” Nate said shaking my dad’s hand firmly. “And it’s so nice to meet you too, Mrs. y/l/n, you look lovely today,” 

“It’s nice to meet you too son,” my dad nodded. I couldn’t quite read his expression, but by the look on my mom’s face, she already loved him. 

“Okay!” I called, clapping my hands together. “Let’s eat!” A murmur of approval waved around the room, as we all moved towards the table. I took a seat beside Nate, across from my parents, while the rest of the boys took the remaining seats. 

During dinner, my dad asked those typical “dad” questions, trying to look intimidating, but soon giving up the act and opening up to Nate. Not far into the meal, the two were getting hyped up about a basketball team that they both enjoyed. I looked down the table at the rest of the boys, and sighed in relief, signaling a thumbs up. They returned the gesture before Sam pointed at me and Nate and started to symbolize hip thrusting against the table. Typical Sam, making dirty jokes in any way possible. I rolled my eyes before laughing and turning back to the conversation in front of me. I then looked at my mom, as she mouthed, “We love him.” I grinned widely, before looking down at Nate’s hand which was rested on my knee, placing it into mine. My dad ended up engaging conversation about basketball, again, with all 5 of the guys. They really seemed to get along. It was amazing.

“Y/d/n, we have a hilarious story about y/n playing basketball with us,” Nate said, smirking at me. 

“Oh no you don’t. That story is super embarrassing!” I yelled.

Laughing, Gilinksy began to narrate the story, looking over at me once in a while. “So we were at a friends house, and since they have a court at their house, we decided to play. It was just us 5 at first, but we wanted to even out the teams, so eventually, we asked y/n came to play with us. She agreed, and we were in the midst of a tie-breaker when I passed it to her. She had a clear shot, and if she made it, then we would have won. But then, y/n decides to run the opposite direction of the basket and ended up shooting on the wrong hoop. Surprisingly, she made it, and she was so happy, but when we told her what had happened, y/n just had this really confused look on her face. It was priceless.” 

The whole room shook with laughter as I covered my cherry-red face. I mean, yeah I was embarrassed, but it made my parents laugh. and knowing that they’re happy with my life decisions and my friends, makes me happy too. I stuck my tongue out at G. 

“Told you I would hold them up with some killer jokes” he said slyly as I burst into laughter. Gotta love him. 

Years after the last Battle of Hogwarts Harry gets a call in the middle of the night from a frantic voice that he can’t quite place until he hears, “She’s magic just like you were. Your niece is magic.” (and he smiles into the receiver, “how’re you Big D”)

#3: “did you know that i loved you?”

a scenario in which i was shamefully inspired by a justin bieber song

Namjoon (Rap Monster):

The brunette couldn’t fight back the silly grin that made it’s way onto his lips as he watched the girl in front of him struggle with the jar of pasta sauce. “Are you sure you don’t want help?” He chuckles.

“I can do this by myself!” She barks back at her best friend, knuckles turning white from the tight grip she held on the jar’s lid. Namjoon just nodded, watching her with a very amused expression on his face. He couldn’t help but think about how this silly little quirk was one of the many things about the girl he’d been friends with for years, that made him fall for her.


Something similar to a fiery rage burned inside of him as the tears poured from her eyes, frantic hiccups ruining her breathing. “I don’t underst-stand!” She sobs. “Why am I not- not good enough for him?”

“You are!” Jimin protests, pulling the girl into his side. “As a matter of fact you’re too good for him, (Y/N). He’s nothing but trash, completely beneath you I promise.” He was beyond furious the longer she cried over that soggy dumpling of an ex boyfriend. To Jimin, it was trashbags like her ex boyfriend that completely ruined her. And that’s what made it so damn hard for him to try to even consider telling her that he should be the one to try and fix what the others broke, because he knew she’d be too reluctant to date her best friend.

Taehyung (V):

“What?” She asks with wide eyes looking at Taehyung.

“I said-” Taehyung clears his throat to make his words clearer, confident. “I said you should go out with me then.”

“Taehyung,” he can see the hesitation in her. “don’t make those kind of jokes. They can really hurt someone’s feelings.”

“I wasn’t joking. I mean it, (Y/N). I’m your best friend, I don’t see why you would want to date anyone else.” Taehyung replies with a ‘isn’t this common knowledge’ look on his face.

Seokjin (Jin):

“Okay,” She breathes in. “so I just put this in here, right?” She looks up at the much taller male with doe like eyes.

“Mhm,” He smiles down at her.”and then you mix it.” She nods, following his instructions.

“Thank you.” Her soft voice interrupts the comfortable silence that had fallen between them as she mixed the batter.

“For what?”

“For teaching me how to bake a cake, everyone didn’t have the time, or didn’t want to. So thanks Jin.” She smiles sweetly at him, making his heart race, something he really wishes his best friend didn’t cause.

Hoseok (J-Hope):

“No!” Hoseok laughs obnoxiously. “It’s like this,” he repeats the dance moves correctly. “Not like that.” His hands motion to the weird way her body moved.

“I told you I can’t dance~” She whines, flopping to the floor out of frustration, falling onto her back. “Let’s just stop before I embarrass myself anymore.”

 “Okay, okay.” He chuckles at her before grabbing a bottle of water and taking a seat next to her limp body. She peeks up at him to see him smiling down at her.

“What are you so smiley about?” She questions, sitting up and snatching the water bottle from him.

“What, nothing.” He responds quickly, the smile on his face falling, and his eyes finding anywhere else to look because truth be told she was the smile on his face, she was the loud laughs he couldn’t contain, and it was hard to explain that his best friend.


“So,” the nerves overwhelming Jungkook were definitely noticeable to the girl on the end of the phone. “I w-was wondering if you could give me some advice.”

“Okay,” she chirps. “what’s up, Kook?”

“How do I tell a girl…” He trails off unable to get the words out himself.

“Tell a girl what? That you like her?” She guess on her own.

“Yeah,” he nods even though she can’t see it. “How do I do that?”

She hums for a second, thinking. “Do you think you’re brave enough to tell her to her face?”

He answers with a second thought, “I don’t think so.”

“Alright, how about texting her? That’ll be less uncomfortable then saying it to her face and getting rejected or calling her and getting rejected.”

The boy groans but she laughs. “What makes you think I’ll be rejected???”

“Don’t worry, Kookie. No girl is stupid enough to reject you.”

“Really?”  He asks, finger nervously tapping the send button.

“Yeah, of course- Hold on I got a text.”

Yoongi (Suga):

Yoongi barely heard his cell phone ringing over the beat that filled the studio. But he caught it just in time, right before the ringing would stop. “Hello?” He answers paying no interest in who the caller I.D had shown was calling.

“Yoongi.” A voice cracked on the other end, making Yoongi’s fingers scramble to the volume buttons to bring the studio into silence.

“(Y/N), what’s wrong?” The sound of his close friend crying brought him nothing but anger. Just the thought of this precious girl being upset peeved him. He wanted to protect her, to show her how good things can be. But the longer she was with that piece of shit boyfriend of hers she’d never know what good was because of he did was hurt her. And that hurt Yoongi, it angered him, because he knew that he could do so much better, he could treat her so much better.

If you have music that auto-plays on your tumblr...

Don’t, just please don’t. I always have music from Spotify, either that or I’m watching something on Netflix, and I tend to open a bunch of tumblr links as background tabs. That makes me have to frantically run around to figure out wich tab plays music. Autoplaying sound is the devils work, kids.

Just out of curiosity, does anyone ever sit down and listen to the music people put on their tumblrs? I’m genuinly curious here. I have a deep hatred for everything autoplay (don’t even get me started on the ads on TSR that autoplay music), but considering how many tumblrs have it, it must be because someone listens, so I guess I’m a minority?

Send Me the Moon: Part 5

Caroline adjusted one of the dangly earrings that Rose had insisted she buy yesterday on their quick shopping trip. It was simply silver, nothing exciting, but she felt another piece of her settle as she studied herself. A little make-up and pretty jewelry might not have seemed like much, but looking at herself in the mirror, she caught one glossed lip between her teeth.

She looked happy.

And wasn’t that something.

She was nervous, little flecks of her wolf turning her eyes a paler shade of blue, but the little bubbles of excitement were heady. Tonight was the Mating Celebration for Elijah snd Katerina; it was going to be loud and chaotic, and Klaus would be there. Hence, the frantic shopping trip with Rose - although she’d tried to brush it off as as needing something nice to wear to her first pack event. Three weeks ago, she’d have locked herself in her room.

Caroline straightened her shoulders and gave her outfit a critical once over. Dark jeans tucked into a pair of boots, and a thin, long sleeved sweater as her concession to the cold. Simple, but the jeans and boots did great things for her legs and the sweater dipped to show off her collarbones and hugged her chest. She nodded.

Time to go, before she lost her nerve.


Klaus was antsy and he knew it. He hadn’t seen Caroline since their little run-in and his wolf was letting him know exactly how unhappy that made him. Last night he’d hardly slept, knowing that she’d be here, too agitated to do more than toss and turn. What few snatches of sleep he’d managed were haunted by Caroline’s sunshine scent and the remembrance of how her skin had felt under his hands.

“You know, if I was easily annoyed, right now, I’d be annoyed,” Katerina cut into his thoughts. “Since you’re obviously not paying a whit of attention to me and its my party.”

“You’re mated now,” Klaus responded with amusement. “Don’t tell me Elijah is
anything but attentive.”

Katerina’s face softened, eyes warming. It’d taken Klaus some time to understand what Elijah had seen in the spiky human lawyer, but there had been no doubt from the start that Elijah had known. Katerina had taken quite a bit more time, refusing to believe in ‘that mating nonsense.’

“Don’t tease,” she warned, eyes narrowing. “I’m meaner than you.”

Klaus grinned, held up his hands. “I’d never.”

Not when his heart was a fist in his chest, need something tangible in his veins. Katerina pursed her lips, considered his expression. “Who is she?”

“Mine,” he said simply. “Keep those claws of yours out of it.”

She pursed her lips in disapproval. “I’m human.”

“Anyone who doesn’t see the predator under your skin deserves what they get,” Klaus started, but his words died as he caught sight of sunshine curls and that tentative smile that made him want to cuddle. He drank in the long lines of her, the smug fitting top and his wolf sang in his veins.

“Well,” Katerina suggested in amusement, “you should ask her to dance.”


Caroline slipped behind a tree for a quick breather. There were so many people; her pack back home had been half this size. But God, she was having fun even if occasionally she got tripped up by the accents. Biting down a smile as the music started, she wondered when it was appropriate to slip back to her room.


Klaus’ voice washed over her, gentle even colored in amusement. Caroline jumped a little and glanced at the Alpha watching her from behind devouring eyes. Was she brave or not?

“I haven’t been to a pack gathering this large before,” Caroline confessed, watching him from beneath her lashes. Wondering if he’d mind if she moved closer.

Klaus grinned, a small thing that just caught his dimples. “We’re a handful, but worth it.”

Caromine hummed an agreement and wetted her lips, stomach jumping at the heat that flashed in those eyes. “You know, Henrik is quite a fan of yours.”

His smile turned lazy and he stepped closer. She could feel the heat of him through her clothing and her breath caught. The need to touch was nearly a physical ache. “I bribe him.”

She couldn’t help the laugh that bubbled in her throat at the mischievous look. “Do you bribe everyone with cookies?”

Carefully, eyes locked onto hers, he stroked the back of his knuckles down her cheek. Her wolf lunged at her skin, desperate for more and she shuddered. Klaus’ eyes turned copper and he shifted to cup her jaw. Caroline wanted to soak him in, step close and slide her hands under the softness of his shirt to feel even softer, warmer skin.

“Do you dance?”

She blinked, pulled back from the edge of her need, barely. Tried to consider his question. “I used too.”

Dimples flirted with her, and his free hand curved along her hip. “Good.”

Caroline gasped, hands curling into his shirt as he tugged her forward, into the group of laughing people she’d avoided. Klaus ignored her surprise, pulled her close and guided her through the crowd with easy, sure movements.

It took Caroline a moment to clear the haze from her brain from touching him. His shoulder was from beneath her hand, and with her boots they were equal in height, and somehow he still managed to make her feel delicate.

“That was mean,” Caroline grumped at him, finding the beat and her feet.

“Now, sweetheart, it’s like swimming. Better to just dive in.”

She rolled her eyes. “Now I know where Henrik gets it. So impatient.”

A graze of his lips against her jaw and she barely held in a moan. “You’ll find love, I’m a patient man, for you.”

His tone left her warm. She dug her nails into his shoulder, just a little and was satisfied at the small hitch in his breathing. “I suppose we’ll see, won’t we.”

His wolf watched her. “A challenge, Caroline?”

Her chin lifted. “We haven’t even finished a dance.”

He tugged her closer, shifted his grip and grinned. “Far be it for me to deny you, sweetheart.”

She gasped as he spun her, laughed as he twirled her about. Gave herself permission to enjoy this. To hug the warmth of him a little closer.


Klaus managed two dances before he was tugged away. Rose showed up at her elbow, was wearing a knowing little grin and tugged her to the food tables. Caroline was fairly sure she was going to need to roll herself back to her room. She couldn’t quite remember being this full before.

Fighting a yawn, she looked around the little glade. The pups had long since been put to bed, and people were starting to slip away for more private parties. Now was as good a time as any to head back.

Caroline glanced back towards Klaus one once last time, unable to help herself and froze; shock opening a wound she’d thought finally closed over. Her wolf dropped low, ears flat and everything inside her collided painfully. Because for a moment her eyes told her that Elena was poking Elijah with a well manicured hand, eyes flashing. Blinking rapidly, she forced herself to look harder and there were subtle differences - Elena never wore curls, and the predatory expression didn’t belong behind those eyes. And she could have sworn she was human, body fluid in her movements but not quite flush with changing grace.

Her stomach rolled anyway.

She ignored Rose calling her name and slipped back into the Den, skin breaking out in a cold sweat. Caroline didn’t run, but it was a near thing. She managed to make it to her room before the tears hit.

No One Ever Tells You….I don’t think I posted this though I know I’ve tried several times

Eta: it’s not the whole song. This was the point when my phone started telling me it was out of space to record anything and I started frantically deleting apps, etc

Couple Next Door

Seokjin thinks that their new neighbors are serial killers but Yoongi thinks that he’s just over reacting.


“Yoongi I am not going to have Jungkook being raised next to serial killers!"Seokjin exclaimed while bouncing their baby boy in his arms as he moved around the living room. Yoongi was just sitting on the couch watching his husband frantically look through the blinds of the window that looked at the house next to them.

"They aren’t serial killers honey,"Yoongi replied calmly as Seokjin let the blinds fall back down,"They’re just a young couple that moved in next door. There’s nothing to worry about.”

“Did you see the boxes yesterday?"Seokjin said while holding Jungkook even closer to him,"It was soaked in blood!”

“That was red paint that spilled, they’re painting their bedroom red,"Yoongi explained,"Just because their choice in decorating is questionable it doesn’t mean they’ve killed someone.”

“Explain to me why they had so many ropes and saws!"Seokjin demanded.

"Because one of them works as a constructor at his uncle’s company. You should have talked to them yesterday when they moved in,"Yoongi commented while pulling his husband to sit down on the couch next to him. Placing a kiss on a sleepy Jungkook, Yoongi shook his head,"Don’t be so paranoid. They seem like a nice couple.”

“I still don’t trust them.”

“Yoongi!"Seokjin cried while running into the house with grocery bags filling his arms. Yoongi who had been taking a nap on the couch bolted straight up, looking at his distressed husband,"I swear they’re murderers!”

“Seokjin, what happened?"Yoongi asked getting up and walking over to Seokjin who was frantically moving around the kitchen, putting away the groceries while simultaneously freaking out.

"I saw the shorter one having someone in handcuffs and with duck tape over their mouth. He was dragging him into the house!"Seokjin frantically recalled while running around until his husband caught him and held him steady,"We’re going to die. We need to move, change our names, dye our hair, find Kookie another school, and a house with a better kitchen.”

“First of all, I promise you that we’ll get a better kitchen in this house. We’ll go shopping later,"Yoongi replied holding Seokjin in place in front of him,"Secondly, was the guy he dragged into the house tall, brown hair, and seemed really hyper?”

“Yeah."Seokjin answered recalling the man being that exact image.

"That’s just their friend Hoseok, he’s harmless but sometimes they put tape over his mouth because he doesn’t shut up. And the handcuffs is just because Jimin’s a cop in training so he needs to learn how to use them properly, Hoseok is basically a training dummy for him. Maybe a bit unconventional but nothing involving killing,"Yoongi explained while rubbing his husband’s shoulders,"They aren’t murderers. Honey I think you’re just being paranoid.”

“Maybe,"Seokjin replied while Yoongi gave his confused husband a kiss on the cheek,"But what if they really a-”

“Then I’ll fight them because no one hurts my family,"Yoongi reassured,"If anyone wants to try anything then they have to get through me. I promise I won’t let anything happen to you or Jungkook. Now go sit on the couch and I’ll put everything up.”

“Yoongi, Yoongi wake up,"Seokjin hissed in a hushed voice while hitting his husband repeatedly. Yoongi let out a groan before opening his eyes,"I think someone’s in the house.”

“What?"Yoongi asked while sitting up. Seokjin grabbed the baby monitor from their bed side table and twisted one of the knobs, bringing up the volume so they could hear is better. The sound of shuffling could be heard across the nursery floor and Jungkook’s soft breathing while he slept,"Stay here.”

Yoongi pulled himself out of bed and grabbed the closest heavy object which turned out to be a broom, and made his way to the nursery. He took in a deep breath before bursting into the room ready to beat someone with his cleaning weapon. But when he burst through the door the man had already jumped out the window of the nursery and booked it. Running downstairs and out the front door he saw the intruder running down the street.

“Get back here!"Yoongi screamed while trying to run after him but stops when the intruder’s out of sight. He went back into his house and made sure to lock the door behind him. Walking back to the nursery to close the window, he saw Seokjin in the rocking chair singing Jungkook back to sleep. Setting the broom down at the door, he quietly shut the window and went over to his family,"It’s okay now. He’s gone.”

“You hear that Kookie?"Seokjin smiled, talking to the half-asleep baby,"Daddy protected us. Daddy’s a hero.”

“I’m a dad,"Yoongi replied while kissing the top of Seokjin’s head and then leaning down to kiss Jungkook’s,"I’m not letting anything happen to my family.

"Kookie?"Seokjin asked while looking up from his garden to see that his precious baby was nowhere in sight. He stood up looking around for Jungkook but couldn’t find him anywhere in the garden of their house,"Kookie!”

“Dada,"Jungkook’s familiar voice rang from next door. Seokjin scurried out of their fenced front yard to look at their neighbors’ and saw Jungkook was playing with a hyperactive puppy,"Lookie lookie, doggy!”

“Jungkook you can’t go onto someone else’s property!"Seokjin exclaimed while motioning for him to leave the puppy.

"It’s okay,"A laugh informed Seokjin of someone else’s presence. Taehyung and Jimin were standing at their front door smiling fondly while looking at Jungkook,"We don’t mind.”

“I’m sorry about this,"Seokjin smiled nervously,"He usually doesn’t do this.”

“It’s okay, he’s not hurting anyone. He can stay if he wants, Ddugun needs someone else to play with since Kkanji doesn’t like his presence anymore,"Taehyung replied waving it off,"He’s a real cutie. Takes after you I presume.”

“Biology doesn’t really work that way but I would like to think so,"Seokjin said while walking over and crouching in front of Jungkook,"Kookie, do you want to keep playing with the puppy?”

Jungkook nodded furiously while the puppy licked his face. Laughing, Seokjin ruffled his hair before standing back up.

“Come back before the sun goes down."Seokjin ordered.

"We’ll make sure he makes it safely to your door,"Jimin smiled while leaning into Taehyung’s chest,"Tae, I want a kid.”

“When we settle in,"Taehyung replied with a nod, kissing the crown of Jimin’s head,"We’ll adopt one when we settle in.”

“I think I’ve been judging them unfairly,"Seokjin commented that night while crawling under the covers with his husband. Yoongi wrapped his arm around Seokjin’s shoulders while Seokjin snuggled his head into the crick of Yoongi’s neck,"They seemed like a nice couple today. Took good care of Jungkook while I was gardening, Kookie really likes their dog too.”

“What did I tell you,"Yoongi replied kissing Seokjin’s temple,"Just a nice young couple next door. Nothing to worry about.”

“Maybe you’re right."Seokjin sighed as they settled in for the night.

"So what do you think of the neighborhood?"Jimin asked while putting the dishes in the sink. Taehyung was on the couch in the living room nearby, waiting for Jimin to come sit down with him, occupying himself by playing with Kkanji.

"Pretty nice,"Taehyung replied while jingling the cat toy just barely out of Kkanji’s reach,"I like it. We moved into a nice neighborhood ChimChim.”

“I think so too,"Jimin agreed plopping down next to Taehyung,"I think we can settle down here, start a family, put our past behind us.”

“Hmm,"Taehyung hummed while pulling Jimin towards him, setting his chin on Jimin’s shoulder,"The couple next door have a really sweet kid, they seem like a nice family. It’d be sad if we had to kill them.”

“Taehyung we promised we wouldn’t kill anyone anymore,"Jimin whined as Taehyung gave him a reassuring peck on the cheek,"Put our past behind us. No more murderous tendencies. Understood?”

“Understood,"Taehyung mumbled,"But if Hoseok doesn’t stop accidentally breaking into the wrong house when he’s drunk I’m going to kill him.”

“Not if that dad next door beats you to it.”

anonymous asked:

I feel like if Peter Parker and the Recruit knew each other they'd have a big sister little brother type of relationship because he's so young the Recruit would always worry about him being Spider-Man but he would reassure her and take her advice

He’d be a lil shit is what he would be. Sorry if this drabble is OOC, I actually know very, very, very little about Spider-Man *sob*

“Can you not look at me like that?”

“Like what?” You huffed and crossed your arms.

“Like that! The whole ’I-disapprove-of-you-protecting-NYC’ look.” Peter frantically waved his hand in your direction. “I’ve done this plenty of times before.” He pulled his mask over his face and adjusted it so it would sit properly.

“I don’t disapprove of you protecting NYC. I disapprove of you protecting the city on your own while you are suspended way in the air with only string.” You pointed an accusing finger in his direction and waggled it. “Not only suspended, you are swinging around up there! You cannot fly, young man, you know you can’t.”

“What are you, my mother?” The young superhero shook his head and shrugged. “And excuse you, it’s not string, its webbing. My biology is not so primitive.”

“You were bitten by a radioactive spider, you dork. What part of that implies you would have primitive biology anymore?”

The teen was grinning under his mask. You could feel it. “Glad we agree. Anyway, gotta go, Sis. People to save, buildings to swing from, you know how it is.”

Your lip quirked. “Get out of my sight, you cretin, and be careful out there.”

  • Me admiring different art styles:*likes everything frantically* oh my did you--WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT IT'S SO PRETTY--how long did that take omg--yoooo what are thoooooseeeeee?!

Fern in the lake,
From behind the shadow of the sparrow
You pollute my soul with worry.

That this cascade I fathom
Could be reason for your condition! How I
Have imagined such terror!

Whole forests wait for you.
This baptism—when will it end? When will
The surface fall? The hilt to

An oar and its ear lobe shout
The Declaration of Transcendence quash-
ing the choir methamphetamine.

Beats the shore the Danish
Dough over the drum of the meter frantic &
Deep in Garcia & Garcia’s lost letters.

And then—Life on a line tense;
Life is it I wonder; Life is it I hope; O’ maybe
Life is all about a life here after.

The tug boat draws nearer. The crew
Smiles and exclaims on the dock embracing
As the sparrow left with the tow.