Omg okay so in 1527 Henry VIII was negotiating a marriage between Mary and Francis, the King of France. Francis asked for a portrait of Mary because, you know, he wanted to see what his new wife looked like. Henry obliged, except he also sent Francis a portrait of himself which literally no one had asked for and I find it hilarious. “Oh, you want a picture of my daughter? Sure, but more importantly, here’s a picture of ME”

America: Hey, buddy, quick question, why is your national anthem so freakin’ terrifying?!

France: Oh, did Canada finally translate it for you? 

America: Yes!! Wtf, dude, everyone else has nice songs about how pretty they are and shit but– 

France: Was it the line about the blood–

America: So much blood… 

France: It’s invigorating.  

2014 E. Guigal Côtes du Rhône Blanc

You know me - I can never turn down a Guigal. They just make excellent stuff. Pears, raw almonds, lemons, even a hint of ramune soda, white flowers, tangerine skin, and orange blossoms on the palate. Pears, apples, tangerines, and almonds on the palate. 

4/5 bones


Viognier, Roussanne, Marsanne, Clairette, Bourboulenc, Grenache Blanc

13.5% abv

Côtes du Rhône, FRANCE