All I Ask | Jung Hoseok

Genre: Angst
Word Count: 1.4k
A/N: Inspired by Adele’s song “All I Ask.” Should I make this a series or just leave it as it is?

A teardrop smeared the ink printed on the piece of paper placed on a table. A pen lied beside it, waiting to be uncapped and used. A man and a woman sat on opposite sides, facing each other while an awkward silence enveloped both of their surroundings. What used to be a happy and married couple was now on the point of signing the divorce papers.

A sniff was heard from you when in fact, you tried to be as quiet as possible. Hoseok’s head snapped up at your direction, guilt swimming in his eyes as he took in your form. It hasn’t been long since he has announced that he wants to divorce, stating that he fell out of love and that he wants something new.

Heart dropping at the news, you can’t help but feel like a fool— you thought you were both happy. Three years of being married was the best thing that could ever happen to you and here he was, taking all that happiness from you. However, you knew to yourself that nothing can change his decision. All you can do is let go of the one you love to make them happy, that’s what they said right?

His happiness has always been your priority, making sure he was comfortable and contented. Though guess what— he actually wasn’t. So you looked up to meet his gaze, tears pooling in your eyes and falling from them. You didn’t want to look pathetic in front of him so you lifted your hand up and brushed the tears away. You took a deep breath and pushed the papers and the pen towards his direction, his eyes fractically darting from you and the objects.

You knew you were being selfish for doing this, but you didn’t care at the moment. Standing up with him doing the same, you sighed and looked at him straight in the eyes. You whispered something so incoherent that he had to lean closer, despite telling himself that he really shouldn’t from now on.

“No.” You stated, feeling a bit bolder and speaking louder. He released an exasperated sigh and brought his hands to rub his face in frustration. This wasn’t as easy as Hoseok thought. Though he would be surprised if you didn’t give it a fight.

“Don’t make this any harder for me, Y/N.” He complained, sitting once again and burying his head into his hands. Little did he know that deep inside, you were dying. He didn’t know how much it hurt you to see him like this— wanting to get rid of you as much as possible. It hurt.

“One last time.” His head shot up, looking at you with a confused and angry face. He opened his mouth to speak up but you cut him off. With your arms hanging limply on your sides, you stood before him.

“Spend one more night with me. Hold me like I’m still more than just a friend to you. Take me by the hand while we do what lovers do on a Saturday night.” You told him. This was ridiculous— at least that is what Hoseok thought it was. All he wanted was for you to sign the papers yet here you are, proposing for him to stay the night.

“Y/N—” He started to protest, his mouth opened halfway but he stopped when you lifted your face up. All your strong barricade came down once again, breaking down once again as you kneeled in front of him; taking his hands and leaning your forehead against them. He looked at you with shock and tried to lift you up.

Please.” You had whispered brokenly, looking up at him. He nodded and lifted you by your arms— holding you close to him and cradling your head in his chest. He didn’t know why but it was his instinct to hold you when you were crying. He shouldn’t be doing this. You shouldn’t be doing this, Hoseok, he thought.

But here you both were, cuddling each other like you were fine. You closed your eyes as your head laid in his chest; few more hours from now and all of this will be gone and taken away from you.

On the other hand, Hoseok can’t help the feeling of getting overprotective when you’re in a vulnerable state like now. This is crazy, was what kept going on his mind. He peered at you from below, finding out that you had fallen asleep. You looked so beautiful that he can’t get rid of the fast throbbing of his heart. This is bad, he thought once more. He knew he shouldn’t be holding you so close right now. A few hours was possibly enough to change his decision. But it was too late now, you were already in his arms. And in the midst of his trail of thoughts, his eyes drooped and soon, he followed you— drifting off to dreamland as well.

The bright light seeped through the window, blinding Hoseok momentarily when he had opened his eyes. He let a groan out, turning in the other direction to try to fall back asleep, reaching out to pull you close— like he always does early in the mornings. However, his eyes shot open when he felt the empty space beside him and the absence of your warmth.

He sat up as quick as he can, looking around for any sign of you— heart dropping when he found nothing. He stood up and opened the closet, his eyes tearing up when he found your space vacant, all your clothes gone. He frantically slipped his house slippers on, almost running out when a familiar envelope by the desk caught his attention.

“No.” He whispered, a tear falling out of his eye as he approached it. To him, everything was in slow motion as he picked up the envelope. He wasn’t able to stop the heart wretching sob that got out of his throat when he saw your signature on the space that was once blank. Another paper had fallen out of the envelope, his hands automatically catching it. He tried his best to read it, which was quite hard due to the blurry vision he has as of the moment.

My Hobi,

Thank you. For loving me and cherishing me for the last five years of being together; three years of marriage and two years of just dating wasn’t enough to tell you how much I love you. I remember that time where we were both so flustered the first time we told each other. I remember the comforting embrace you give me whenever I cried about how my job sucks. I remember dreaming about our future together, sitting on a rocking chair on the balcony with gray hair. There’s so many things I remember. There’s more to what I wanted too. I wanted to travel the world with you. I wanted to pursue my dreams of becoming an official author with you standing there with your smile and cheering me on. I wanted to grow up and have kids with you. I wanted to be in your embrace forever, just talking and cuddling before going to sleep. I wanted to look at millions of sunset with you. It’s a shame and really unfortunate that you didn’t want the same thing and that you had different plans. You’re such a jerk, you know that? It hurts so much, Hobi. I always wished to spend my last breath saying I love you to you but all those plans are gone now. I wanted to spend my forever with you. But I want to make you happy as well— so I’m letting you go. I’m sorry to have not been enough. If I ever made you sad, I’m sorry as well. I’m sorry I couldn’t give you the world you deserved. I hope you find someone that could give you the things I couldn’t. Live well. I love you, Jung Hoseok.

“Y/N. I’m sorry.” He croaked out, looking up the ceiling. It was no use though, you had left him, all because of his selfish acts and foolish decisions. He sobbed and dropped himself to the floor. His tears has fallen on the piece of paper, smearing the ink just like you did the time he showed you the divorce paper. He felt pathetic— like a child having tantrums for not getting the candy he wants.

Forever and always, Hoseokie.

And his heart broke even more.


This is science vs. religion, Chaos vs. noise, and a bit about prime numbers… and it’s very pretty (don’t be fooled by the ugly cicadas, they’re only in it for a short while). The fracticals that is, although Molly is also pretty. Not that I’m obsessed or anything.