found them online

Their Favorite Jokes | FF15 Headcanons |

I’m low key sad and need a bit of a pick me up, it’s nothing serious my current sadness just my disorder screwing with me. I was going to ask for jokes but I kinda wondered what the FF15 cast would toss out for lame, corny jokes/puns would toss out. So they range from puns, clean, dirty, sarcastic and dad jokes.

Tagging: @themissimmortal @stephicness @stunninglyignis @blindbae @rubyphilomela @cupnoodle-queen @lady-asuka @zacklover24 @neko-otaku13 @mandakatt @misssarahdoll @miss-scientia @mistressoli @sheylann @cagedbycravings @sweetchocobae @fieryfantasy @roses-and-oceans @waifuthewhite @highwinds-dragoon @blondechocobobutt @promptoargentum-is-my-husband @promptoastandbutter @nykamito @nyxswaifu @inprotocreed @gladiolus-mamacitia @gladixlusamicitia @chocobabyporcelain @chocobroing @insomniascure @insomniacapples @insomniasix @xnoctits @ffxvhoe

Noctis:

  • “Please tell me this train of thought you’re on has a caboose.”
  • “Hey Prom, did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda?” “Oh my is he okay!?” “He was lucky it was a soft drink.”
  • “A snare drum and a cymbal fall out of a tree.” “Oh - okay, Noct” *giggles* “*ba-dum ching*”             

Prompto:

  • “Hey babe, what did the elephant say to the naked man?” “I don’t know Prom…” – “How do you breathe through something so small?”
  • “Hey, sweet-chocobo, why did the witches’ team lose the baseball game?” “Uh, Prom…” “Their bats flew away! Haha!”
  • “Cutie, how come oysters never donate to charity?” “Uh, because they are animals, Prom?” “No, because they are shellfish!”

Gladiolus:

  • “I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.”
  • “Why was the guitar teacher arrested?” “I don’t know Gladdy…” “For fingering a minor.”
  • “What do a penis and a Rubik’s Cubes have in common?” “Gladdy, please.” “The more you play with it, the harder it gets!”

Ignis

  • “You spilled your entire cup of coffee? What’s sumatra with you?”
  • “I do some of my best thinking over coffee. I tend to have a latte on my mind.”
  • “ The hipster burnt his tongue. He sipped his coffee before it was cool. “

Cor:

  • “Don’t spell part backwards. It’s a trap.”
  • “Why does Santa Claus have such a big sack?” “Oh Astrals Cor, please no.”  *huge smirk* “He only comes once a year.”
  • “Why does a chicken coop have 2 doors? Because, if it had 4 doors it would be chicken sedan.”

Ravus:

  • “Did you fall from heaven? Cause your face looks kind of funky.”
  • “If I promise to miss you, will you go, like, really far away.”
  • “I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.”

Cindy:

  • “I always tell new hires, “Don’t think of me as your boss, think of me as a friend who can fire you.”
  • “When I see ads on TV featuring smiley housewives using some new cleaning product, the only thing I want to buy are the meds they’re clearly on.”
  • “Hey, Prince! What does a pepper do when it’s angry?” “I am not sure, Cindy I don’t like veggies.” “It gets jalapeño face!”

Aranea:

  • “Not all men are annoying. Some are dead.”
  • “What’s the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball? A guy will actually search for a golf ball.”
  • “Light travels faster than sound, which is why people like you appear bright—until they open their mouths.”

Lunafreya:

  • “Where does the General keep his armies?” “I don’t know Luna…” “In his sleevies!”
  • “Why aren’t koalas actual bears?” “Uh?”  “The don’t meet the koalafications.”
  • *innocently* “Hey Ignis, why don’t blind people skydive?“ “Lady Lunafreya, excuse me?” “Because it scares the crap out of their dogs!”

Ardyn:

  • “I swear I wasn’t lying, I was just writing fiction with my mouth again.“
  • “Did something bad happen to you, or are you just naturally this terrible of a person?”
  • “I would kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.”

Regis:

  • "Noctis: “Dad, make me a sandwich!” Regis: “Poof, You’re a sandwich!‘”
  • "How do you make a Kleenex dance? Put a little boogie in it!”
  • “5/4 of people admit that they’re bad with fractions.”
8

sakurada dori; monochrome boyfriend aesthetic

Flashbacks 04 - Fate ❤️

“I don’t know if this was fate’s doing or merely me being there at the right moment on the right time… But in you, I found a best friend, a mentor, a playmate, a confidant and my greatest challenge. When I met you, you were in love with someone else, and I am not going to lie, it was a bit soul-crushing…However, I knew… I knew I couldn’t stop fighting, I knew that I had to make you mine, but, most importantly, I knew we belonged together, and that was what made me not give up. On that night, at that bar, I knew from the moment I first saw you that you were going to be the love of life, my “great love story”. And here we are, after running away from your parents and your ex-girlfriend, getting married… I guess I was right from the very beggining. You have made me a better person, as our love for one another is reflected in the way I live my life. So I am truly blessed to be a part of your life, which as of today becomes our life together. No matter what “fate” may have in store for us, I…”

Sirius sings the cup song


I got my ticket for the Hogwarts train
Some firewhiskey for the way
And I sure would like some sweet company
So Prongs, Moony, Wormtail, what do you say?

With my wand
With my wand
I’m doing magic with my wand
Hexing snivellus, not to mention
This is worth to get detention
I’m doing magic with my wand

Playing pranks
Playing pranks
Pranking Slytherins offhand
Shooting spells across the aisle
Pouring Potions in your vial, oh
Pranking Slytherins offhand

I know the entrance to the Shrieking Shack
The haunted building near the school
We’ll be rats
And stags and canines
And a wolf that can be malign
But, I know it’s always fun with you.

It’s full moon
It’s full moon
We’ll be animals tonight
We control the wolf combined
We explore the woods unmind, oh
We’ll be animals tonight


After school
After school
Prongs marries Evans after school
They’ll have children and a cat
Boy, who would have thought of that, oh
Prongs marries Evans after school.

Be with you
Be with you
I just want to be with you
We will get a place together
We’ll live happily no matter, oh
Moony I want to be with you.

Peter’s gone.
Peter’s gone.
We fight a war that can’t be won
So he betrayed us in cold blood
Now I’ve lost all that I’d got, oh
We fought a war that can’t be won

Top 6 Apps for Learning Mandarin Chinese

Last summer, while I was supposed to be studying French intensively, I accidentally started studying Mandarin instead. These things happen! The best thing about Mandarin compared to some other languages I’ve studied (specifically Persian and Korean) is that there are a huge number of resources available to help learners, including a lot of very well-designed apps. After months of obsessively checking the iTunes store for the best apps and trying them out, these are my favorite six (plus a few more worth mentioning). They appear in ascending order from my least favorite to my most favorite.

Worth mentioning: A couple of apps not included on this list but worth mentioning are Pleco and Skritter. 

Pleco is a highly-regarded Chinese dictionary. I have it on my phone and do use it, but I left it off the list because I prefer another (#6 on this list). Since I’m still very much a beginner, a thorough dictionary isn’t quite so important to me right now. However, it seems like every advanced student of Mandarin recommends this app, so I had to include it.

Skritter is another app that’s highly regarded among serious students. I believe it focuses on helping with character recognition and writing. It has a subscription service that is a bit expensive, which is why I’ve never tried it; however, everyone seems to rave about it. If you’re a serious student, you should definitely look into it.

Also, I recommend downloading some Chinese-language apps designed for preschoolers. I found several of them online in the iTunes store, and a lot of them include short stories with simple words, practice with basic characters, etc. Using these apps gives you some immersive listening practice, which is fun. They can be kind of hit and miss, so I recommend downloading all you can find and seeing what you can figure out and what you like. They won’t replace any of the apps below, but they still serve a purpose.

6. WCC Dictionary This is the dictionary I use instead of Pleco. I like it primarily because of its beautiful design (something Pleco doesn’t really have). This app is mainly a dictionary, but it offers a lot more than that. For example, it has a character scanner (so you can look up words you find in books by taking a picture of the character). It also has a “story library” with a few simple books to read (with Pinyin, the characters, an English translation, and the ability to listen to the story being read). Characters are color coded if you use that as a device to help you with tones. It has a flashcard program with pre-created word lists, extensive example sentences, a section on radicals with example words, and stroke order animations. It also offers a “character of the day” and daily “homework” to motivate you to use what you learn. The dictionary itself is free, but there’s a lot of content that you have to pay to unlock, although there’s also a way to buy the content using “coins” that you earn through using the app.

5. Mindsnacks Mandarin A lot of you are already familiar with the Mindsnacks app because it’s offered for a lot of different languages (and a few school subjects like geography). This app uses games to teach Mandarin, mostly focusing on vocabulary (not grammar or sentence construction). It’s a bit limited, but it can be a really fun way to learn. After a while, the games start to feel repetitive and can get boring, but the app also has you move through levels (which allow you to unlock new games) and uses other incentives to keep you playing. The audio is an actual human, too, which is a big benefit since many apps and programs rely on Google Translate robot voices. This is a paid app, which could be a drawback.

4. FluentU This app is the reason I started learning Mandarin in the first place. I tried using it for French, but I felt like my French was too advanced to gain much from it. Even though there were advanced-level videos with vocabulary I didn’t know, FluentU doesn’t do a good job of adapting to your level and guessing which words will give you trouble. That’s perfectly fine for a beginner, though, since every word will probably give you trouble, which is why I used it for Mandarin. I think the makers of FluentU are Chinese speakers, and they seem to have focused more on Mandarin in their app. They have a built-in course you can follow, using videos they made themselves for teaching the language. The videos are pretty good, and you will feel like you’re learning a lot. There are also a lot of other videos if you want to branch out, including some catchy songs and clips from commercials or TV shows. The built-in flashcard system is a good way to review, but there’s no way to adjust their algorithms, so you might end up reviewing the same words way too often. I stopped using the program when I had 400+ words to review every day, and I just couldn’t keep up and continue advancing. This app is also very limited in the free version, and the paid subscription is VERY pricey, in my opinion, especially considering that there are other apps out there that offer more features. All of the videos are on YouTube anyway, so you can still use them to learn as you advance (or if you have a friend who can help you). I recommend this app if you want to pay for one month and use it to study intensively and advance quickly. That’s what I did, and I think it helped me out a lot.

3. ChineseSkill This is the first app that was designed to be a “Duolingo for Mandarin,” and it has a lot of great features. There’s the typical “tree” like in Duolingo, where you advance through different lessons one by one. It teaches character recognition, pronunciation, and grammar. The lessons can be really challenging for a beginner (sometimes too challenging, I thought), but it covers a lot of material. I’m not completely happy with the order in which lessons are taught (for example, there’s a lesson on shapes near the beginning that has you learn words like “triangle,” which seemed unimportant to me). The other drawback is there isn’t an easy way to review what you’ve learned (like on Duolingo when your gold-level lessons start to fade). It’s possible, but not super easy to access. Other interesting features include a tone game, a pinyin chart, a “survival kit” that’s like a travel phrasebook, and practice with stroke order. Also, this app is 100% free, which is amazing! I definitely recommend this app.

2. Social Language This app is really different from the others and is probably the most useful if you believe in speaking a language as soon as possible. I don’t think a lot of English speakers know about it because it seems to be marketed mostly to Chinese speakers. It’s a bit hard to explain, but I’ll try my best: basically, there’s a tree like you have for Duolingo, but the exercises are all to improve your speaking and pronunciation. You work through the lessons, and Chinese-speaking users rate and comment on your recordings. They can even leave voice messages to help you improve. You can do the same for them (in fact, you have to if you want to unlock higher levels). That alone makes the app worth downloading, but even better is that it includes a CHAT FEATURE that makes it very easy to interact with native speakers. You can see the profiles of hundreds of Chinese speakers who are online at any given time of day, and you can send a text or voice message to them and later add them to your friends’ list. What’s more,the ratio of Chinese to English speakers heavily favors English speakers. You will find hundreds of Chinese speakers eager to practice their English, and often you will be one of only a handful of English speakers on the app, meaning you have instant access to a chat partner any time of day or night. Have a question about your homework, something you read, or a phrase you don’t know how to pronounce? Instant, free tutoring is available 24/7 on this app, which is also FREE! I met some really nice people here without the pressure of a more formal language exchange. You can have a casual conversation any time you want, and it’s like text messaging so there’s less pressure if you’re shy about speaking Chinese. The only drawback is the same as with all language exchanges, which is that it’s sometimes difficult to balance the two languages. Also, I had problems with sending voice messages in chat, which can be frustrating. Overall, though, I’d say Social Language is a must-have.

1. HelloChinese This app didn’t exist last summer when I was looking for a Mandarin version of Duolingo, but I discovered it last week and fell in love with it. It actually has fewer features than ChineseSkill, but the pacing seems much better, and it focuses more heavily on pronunciation (though the speech recognition software isn’t perfect and you will sometimes need to skip a speaking question just to keep moving forward). It comes with some good grammar explanations and a really basic flashcard program for review. Honestly, I feel bad for rating it higher than ChineseSkill since ChineseSkill has been around longer and offers a lot more features, but I feel like HelloChinese just makes more sense and is easier to stick with than ChineseSkill. Like ChineseSkill, it’s also 100% free! I consider HelloChinese to be my “core” app for casual study, with the other apps acting as supplements. If you’re a more serious student, HelloChinese might not be your #1 pick, but it’s great for beginners who like the structure of an app like DuoLingo.

The Mask

a/n: this is just because i get cinderella vibes from “i don’t even know your name” and i’ve always wanted to go to a masquerade ball for some reason


The rapid knocking on your door distrubed your study session, causing you to groan. Standing up, you opened the door and saw your friend smiling brightly, pushing herself into your apartment. “Um, come in, why don’t you?” You asked, closing the door. “What’s up? Thought you had a meeting or something?”

“I didn’t need to stay.” She waved off that idea, and unlocked her phone. “But I got a text from Emily, and she said that there’s this masquerade thing next weekend and apperently a lot of people are going so I thought it would be a good idea if we went! You’re always complaining about not having a boyfriend so maybe this will be your chance to find one! And look really pretty, too!”

You laughed, sitting on your couch. “A masquerade ball?” You pondered the idea for a few moments. “Yeah, sure, I’ll go. Seems fun.”

“But there will be free drinks and- wait, did you say you’d go?” Your friend asked, stopping herself. Apparently she thought you wouldn’t want to go.

“Yeah, I could use some fun, and I think a masquerade ball would be really fun!” You nodded, picking up your book. “Now shoo, I need to study for a test.”

Your friend nodded, going to the door. “I’ll text you when we can go get dresses! And a mask! We need to wear masks!” She let herelf out of the apartment, and you rolled your eyes, excited for the party.

Keep reading

I sincerely wish there were more female equivalents to people like the McElroys, Game Grumps, etc.

I think it really shows just how underlying and insidious sexism really is because you’re hard-pressed to name any *popular* female comedians/let’s players/funny content creators in general on the internet.

It goes back to the old idea that women Aren’t Funny™ for whatever reason. It’s still present and while there are women out there being funny and sharing their lives with us, those women face harsh scrutiny and sexism - and rarely reach high levels of success (think Markiplier or Pew/diepie)

It makes me really sad sometimes because while I love people like the McElroys, I yearn to have a female equivalent(s) that I can relate to. I want that representation and it’s just not there.

2

Okay so it’s rumored that Tyler Blackburn is being casted as Betty’s Long-lost Brother. 

I don’t know if this is true but look how similar Tyler Blackburn is to Skeet Ulrich. Their bone structure is so similar and so are their noses and so are their jaw lines. 

I don’t want Bughead to be ruined but if Tyler Blackburn is coming on the show then it’s a good chance it’s FP’s son. The similarities are uncanny. 

(Also I don’t own either of these pics, I found them online. Credit goes to owners)

study sounds masterpost

here are some of my favorite ambient noise tracks to play when studying. enjoy! (note: i did not create these, i just found them online)

Harry Potter 

Lord of the Rings

Star Trek

Other places

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Gif 1: Me when Kaladin goes to help Adolin in the arena (and during that whole fight scene🙌🏻🙌🏻👏🏻👏🏻)
Gif 2: Me immediately following the end of the battle (gifs are not mine, I found them online)