forgive me if it's shit

5

i can’t believe my team leader is a meme: the new series on mtv

The Saloon

Fandom: WWE

Pairing: Dean Ambrose/Sheamus O'Shaunessy/Reader

Rating: Holy shit M.

AN: Heavily inspired by the WWE 2K17 advertisement, though I’ve never touched the game. So uh, another AU. Also, HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO @tox-moxley and HAPPY THIRST PARTY SATURDAY @hardcorewwetrash ENJOY!


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MI CAMA

GUYS, REALLY, I DON’T KNOW WHAT I’M DOING. BUT, AS ALWAYS, MY MIND TENDS TO CLOUD WITH IDEAS VEEEERY DIFFERENT FROM THE SUBJECTS I SHOULD BE STUDYING.
So, this thingy was born to be part of a bigger thingy that think I’ll post after exam period. But the bigger thingy has been shaped by moi a little differently and this couldn’t fit no more…
What else?? Ah, give me some sort of feedback (even negative in anon, I want to ear FROM YOU).
You are all beautiful
Besitosssssss

Lin x Reader
I think it can be considered fluff (I like writing fluffy fluff) (I know, it’s boring)


You felt the sun hitting your closed eyes. Yesterday night you forgot to close the windows properly. You had been distracted by someone who was rubbing his nose along your neck.
“Do not even try to wake me up.” You muttered pushing your back more into his chest to catch as much warmth as possible.
“You are already woken up.”
“My eyes are still closed. So I’m still in my sleep-zone.” You asnwered.
“According to whose rules?” He laughed on your shoulder.
“Mine. Obviously.” You said turning on your side and hiding between his arms, buring your face in his body.
“You are the worst. Ever.” He stroked your hair placing a kiss on top of your head.
“Mmh mmh.” He smelled so nice. Minty and grapefruity and a hint watermlony like your deodorant. Yes, he used your deodorant. ‘Cause women deodorants are better.’
“I get you want to sleep, but why don’t you go to the bathroom and remove your make up?”
At that point you felt urged to open one eye and shoot a killer look towards him.
“Good morning, sunshine.” He smiled to you.
“What you were saying about my makeup?”
“Don’t even try to sound mean. More than Cruella, you look like one of the Dalmatians right now.” He tried to catch your nose between two fingers.
“But I’m tiiired.” You cried hiding your head under the sheets.
“Remove it and then you can go back to sleep. It’s always chemical stuff sitting on your skin. Let’s go. C'mon.” And you felt him getting up.
God, he was so stubborn. Sweet and caring, but stubborn. You did know that it was bad sleeping with your makeup on but it happened other times and once more was nothing. Moreover it was your skin. You could decide what to do with it. And you decided to sleep.
“Y/n?” He called you.
You peeked from under the sheets. And there was him in front of you standing at the end of the bed. In all his greatness. His hair in a million different directions. The marks left by the pillow case on his cheek. He was still sexy. Even with your pink batman sweatpants, his favourite.
“You leave me with no choice.” He said putting his hands on his hips.
What was he going to do? You felt two cold hands around your ankles and you squealed.
“LIN!” You screamed while he was sliding your body towards the end of the bed.
You were almost standing completly up when you remembered you were naked and grabbed one of the sheets before he could take your hands and put you up.
“No way! You are a party crasher. I was hoping in seeing you in all your glory.” He said pouting.
“You made me getting up. You are lucky to be alive.” You pinched his chin and headed to the bathroom with him behind.
You looked at the mirrow: you weren’t that bad. The light gloss you applied before going out was completely gone (and you have just FEW memories about how it wore off), blush was out, but your eyes where almost perfect and you could spot a light reminiscence of the highlighter. You had done a wonderful job inventing the perfect ‘sex-proof’ makeup. 'It can be considered quite a skill, I suppose.’ You thought.
“How is it possible that everything is still where it was before dinner? I thought I made you sweat a little … lot!” Lin said observing you squeezing makeup remover on two cotton pads.
“Witching powers, honey.” You said winking before putting the pads on your eyes.
“ I KNEW IT!” He said hugging you from behind while you washed everything off.
After few minutes of rubbing, spalshing water and soaping you said “everything’s gone. Can i go to sleep now?” Turning towards him.
“That’s my girl. Now I can do this- and kissed your cheek- and this- a kiss on the eye.”
“So you weren’t worried about me. You wanted only to fullfill your needs.” You slapped your hands on his bare torso.
“Ouch.”
“I’m the one who is hurt right now!” You said crossing you arms and covering your body even more in the blue sheets.
“You are such a wuss.” He replied lifting you from the floor and carring your body on his shoulders, while heading towards the bedroom.
“Lin, put me down! Right! Now!” You raised your voice.
He kept walking and put you on the bed.
“Listen to me girl: I listen to you complaining about brekouts more than I want to and I SURELY remember when you had that awful conjuntivitis. I still have the medical precrisption in my wallet in case you need meds immediatly. My job is to protect you, even from your laziness. Moreover you are beautiful even without a single pinch of that glittery stuff. And if I can get some advantages from the whole situation, I don’t see nothing bad in that.” He schooled you with shiny eyes and waving a finger in the air.
You started giggling and fell backwards on the mattress.
“What?” A puzzling look on his face.
“You are adorable..” You said shifting your weight on your elbows.
“Does this means we’re good?” A smirk on his face.
“Not yet. I haven’t forgiven you for waking me up.” You said.
“I had few ideas to gain your forgiveness but I need to enter into your sheet fort.” He replied lowering his tone. This shift in his voice, the events of the night before, the lack of clothes on the two of you, a wonderful and free Saturday morning made you think a different kind of 'entrance’. Blushing, like a teenager let me say, you added: “But we have a strict rule in here.” And you made a nod towards the sweatpants.
“Oh, I see.” He said smiling, removing the pants and jumping on you.
“Lin, you are hurting me!” You said with a high pitched voice laughing.
“I would never do that!” He replied finding his way through tha sheets, reaching for your body with his cold fingers and placing them on the small of your back. You put yours behind his neck.
And the two of you stayed there, staring into each other’s eyes and smiling.
“The freakles.” He said all of a sudden.
You gave him a strange look.
“The makeup was hiding the freakles.”
“Oh. So you prefer me seeing me with less makeup?” You asked with a tone more serious than you entended it to be while removing some of his hair from the forehead.
“I prefer seeing you. Makeup doesn’t modify your beauty. You are always beautiful to me. Even when you feel that you aren’t.” His eyes were wide open, the face lightly flushed and your bodies were so close you could feel without doubt his heartbeating increasing ever so slightly.
He was such a gentle soul. And he was so intelligent. And charismatic. And he chose you. You could sense some tears of joy starting to form at the corner of your eyes and to avoid starting crying in front of your boyfriend you said “You’re such a ball of pale pink fluff, Miranda.”
“Oh, yes?” He said before making a sound resembling a 'roar’ and kissing his way down your body tickling you.
“Lin, the beard!” And you started laughing and trying to escape from him. But he pulled you closer and continued your little torture.
You two spent the next 20 minutes fighting each other then Lin said, almost screamed: “OK. Time out. White flag. Enough. You win!” He said pulling himself slightly up.
“Not so fast, pretty boy. As winner, I want a reward: 30 minutes more in bad and then we’ll go and make breakfast. Ah! And you’ll be my matress.” You said putting your head on his chest, both facing the ceiling.
“I’ll always be happy to your cama.” He said playing with your hair.
“What?” You sensed a different tone in his words.
“Cama. Bed.”
“What did you mean to say? You, idiot"You slapped the part of stomach next to your head.
“Bed. The safe place you go back each night, each time you have a tough time. A place where you feel good.” He almost whispered.
“You do know I love you, right?” A single tear wetting your cheek.
“I know.” A moment of pure silence in the bedroom. “But never call me 'pretty boy’ ever again. Aunt Gertrude used to do that. And trust me, you don’t want me to picture her when I’m with you. God, no.” He said disgusted
You both burst into laughter.
You do love your cama very, very much.

8

I like to imagine Drew’s first impression on the YLW team went something like this… (based off of this)

//@ask-spoop @ask-medicrap @ask-engiepoop @ask-snipoop @ask-sollypoop @the-pypoop @ask-scoutpoop @ask-democrap @askpootis @ask-misspooling fORGIVE ME AND MY RANDOM SHITPOST

6

vs Middlesbrough F.C. // 14.12.2016

Adam Lallana 68′

requested by anon

the signs as tomarry/harrymort fic plots
  • Aries: harry goes dark and joins voldemort
  • Taurus: "harry" born in tom's era
  • Gemini: harry and tom grow up together
  • Cancer: harry goes back in time to when tom is at hogwarts
  • Leo: voldemort figures out that harry is his horcrux
  • Virgo: harry finds tom riddle's diary
  • Libra: the horcrux in harry starts talking to him
  • Scorpio: harry is some sort of creature and lovin' happens
  • Sagittarius: idk locket!tom/harry
  • Capricorn: some sort of voldemort wins au
  • Aquarius: either harry or voldemort somehow get turned into a snake
  • Pisces: some variation of the wrong bwl au
6

“that’s my fave… when jim does that”

eg: that face that jamie does all the time

Southern USA Gothic
  • “Oh my God, I can’t stand her. She’s such an awful person and I can’t–” You pause for a moment, distracted. You begin to hear the drums. They’re getting progressively louder. You stutter and stumble over your words. “..uh, b-bless her heart.” The drums stop.
  • You go to pour yourself a glass of water, but it comes out sweet tea. You try and take a shower, and sweet tea comes out of the shower head. All there is is sweet tea. There is no escape.
  • Your Iron Ceremony is today. You are scared. Will you be assigned Alabama or Auburn? Your entire family is comprised of war eagles, what if you’re a roll tide? You are terrified. You pray that you are not assigned the Gators.
  • As your mother flips through the radio stations in the car, you think about how it’s literally nothing but country stations. You do not mention it, however, because /they/ will be angered. Your family falls silent; Rick and Bubba is on.
  • Someone mentions Florida being in the south, and you laugh. Florida is not a southern state. Florida is a sin.
  • You accidentally nick yourself while cutting vegetables, and your blood is blue. You must conceal it immediately; nobody can know you’re a democrat. Not until you get past Kentucky.
  • You’ve been stuck in NASCAR traffic for a long time now. You’re not sure how long you’ve been stranded in your car. You miss home. A trailer honks by, and a tear falls down your cheek.
  • You are at a steakhouse, and you are offered fried chicken by a friend from their plate. You decline, saying you don’t like fried chicken. The restaurant falls quiet, and all heads turn to face you with blank expressions. Nobody moves.
4

and when i look at you, the stars glow in my eyes. it’s strange, because my eyes have never held anything so warm and bright before without being burned.

Funhaus in a Nutshell

Peake is a mountain man who lives with his head in the clouds and feet in the sand. Waves crash below him but they daren’t touch him.

Adam is a whisper in the low fog from one lover to another. Sweet kisses on the cheek like soft goodbyes.

Lawrence is a hard, sculpted man like marble gods in high arched towers. He stands his ground with his hands on his hips and he is a force of law. Both literally and figuratively.

Sean is the lowriding tide that comes in when the moon soars high over the clouds and past the horizon. He is stars decorating the quiet sky and blinking bright, bright, brightly.

James is blue eyes and the champion of the Gods. He wears the smile of Aphrodite and makes men and women swoon with a single glare.

Elyse is a goddess among mortals. She hides in the corners of back alleys and side doors, but always reminds you to turn on the front porch light, to feed the dog, to say goodnight to the sun when it sets.

Bruce is defiance. Bruce is a protector, a sentry, a warrior who was swore to protect the innocent from the end of time till the end of time again. On repeat, he is fearless.

Joel is a nightingale. He is satin and soft fabrics and moonlight sonatas. He holds the conductor’s baton like twirling a wand and he is magic.  

2

If I let go of your hand, you’ll fly away and break
I’m scared scared scared of that

3

Lunch break is for shopping. Antique shopping.