I will have spent my life trying to understand the function of remembering, which is not the opposite of forgetting, but rather its lining. We do not remember, we rewrite memory much as history is rewritten. How can one remember thirst?
Chris Marker, from Sans Soleil (Argos Films, 1983)
And she never did figure out which was worse: trying to forget the way his voice sounded down the phone in the early hours of the morning, or the feeling of her existence slowly being erased from his memory until he could swear he had never known her at all.
S.Z. // Excerpt from a book I’ll never write #72
Oh darling, do not be ashamed of the way
you cry for him. It does not give him
power over you. Like the great floods of old
you are simply washing yourself of
wickedness, and soon he will be forgotten.
Sometimes there are things we would much rather just forget, or at least put them out of our mind for a bit. Here’s a little spell to help with that.
Incense (Dragon’s blood is particularly good, or anything with an intense scent)
Incense holder to collect the ashes
Basil, Eucalyptus, Frankincense, Lavender, Myrrh, Sage, any combination of herbs for cleansing and purification or self acceptance or banishing. (Optional, and use any, all, or none of these listed. This part is completely up to you)
Sea Salt or Black Salt (for banishing/purifying the thought you want to forget)
Burn the incense all the way down. Think of what you are trying to forget while you inhale the scent and watch the smoke drift about. Focus on this memory. Imagine parts of the memory falling away or being destroyed as the ashes fall onto the incense holder.
Once you have this collection of ashes, in a small bowl or mortar combine the ash with whatever herbs you decide to use and salt. Mix or ground until well combined.
Step outside with the bowl of ash herbs and salt, and pour it into your hand. This is what is left of your memory. Blow the ashes away, and in doing so, imagine the ashes taking that memory with them as they scatter to the wind.
There isn’t really any spell that can help you forget completely - you will not permanently erase your memories - but there are spells that can help you accept and move on, and make things easier to handle or deal with.
Please note, there is likely not much these spells will do if you are not actively trying to move on in your own way - you have to do some of your own actions to ensure that you are indeed moving on, and doing what you can to forget and let go. Magic should not be relied on solely to solve one’s problems.
Well, what I miss the most about him is the way he used to lie down next to me at night, sometimes his arm would stretch along my chest and I couldn’t move, I even held my breath. But I felt safe, complete. And I miss the way he was whistling walking down the street and every time I do something I think of what he would say: “Well it’s cold today, wear a scarf”. But lately I’ve been forgetting little things, he’s sort of fading. I’m starting to forget him and it’s like losing him again. So sometimes I make myself remember every detail of his face; the exact color of his eyes, his lips, his teeth, the texture of his skin, his hair.. but it was all gone by the time he went. And sometimes -not always- but sometimes I can actually see him - It’s as if a cloud moves away and there he is, like I could almost touch him. But then the real world rushes in and he vanishes again. Well, I did this every morning when the sun was not too bright outside - the sun somehow makes him vanish, as he appears and he disappears like a sunrise or a sunset or anything so ephemeral, just like our life. We appear and we disappear and we are so important to some, but we are just passing through.