force meat

listen, it is always valid and NEVER inappropriate to eat any food you want in public. don’t let friends, family, strangers, or the baltimore police department shame you for serving human meat. forcing a man to eat his own face is normal and healthy

2

Saitama vs Wobbuffet:

When and unstoppable force meats an immovable object.

Saitama from one punch basically one-hit KO’s EVERYONE. In contrast, Wobbuffet has one of the highest HP and Defense stats in Pokemon, and with the move “counter” can deal double the damage an opponent deals to it. You could argue that Saitama would still be able to one-hit KO a wobbuffet…BUT! If wobbuffet had an in game item called the “focus sash” it allows any pokemon to survive a potential KO with 1 hp left. Meaning probable complete destruction of earth, if “counter” is used against Saitama.

Shout out to my best buddy Alex for giving me this idea to work off of.

youtube

thestarsofmygalaxy  asked:

When do you think Kaneki started catching feelings for Touka?

Well, we know that by the Kureo Mado arc he had already started to care about her:

And that by the Aogiri arc she tied in with Hide as his most important person:

And judging by Haise’s great big crush on her, Kaneki already held romantic feelings for her by the start of :re. After all, the emotions which are obvious in Haise are the ones suppressed in Kaneki.

These are the three milestones, which neatly encapsulate the original series, through which we can plot the development of Kaneki’s feelings for Touka.

Kaneki always had a slight interest in Touka even before the whole spiral of events that brought them together. At that time, he just thought she was cute, but when she force-fed him human meat, he became more curious about her. Although he found her scary, he could not help but feel kind of grateful to her for easing his hunger pains. This was his first introduction to the consideration and kindness that underlies Touka’s hostile demeanour - in his grimmest and loneliest time yet, she and Yoshimura were the only ones who helped him.

The time she saved him from eating Hide also contributed to his interest in and gratitude towards her, but the real turning point was when Uta told him about a different side to her than the one she portrays. 

After hearing more about her struggle to connect with humans as Uta implied, Kaneki gained a respect for her. After the death of Ryouko, he related to Touka’s feelings of grief and powerlessness, and, while he didn’t agree with her methods, he still respected that she was the only one doing anything to stop the Doves. By that point, Kaneki found himself liking this scary girl, and had enough faith in her to ask her for training. Their training was intense, but the two evidently bonded over the course for it, and as we’ve seen recently Kaneki was very grateful for what she taught him.

From then on, their teamwork under an extremely high pressure situation led to a real camaraderie forming between them. Touka also did something for Kaneki that practically nobody save for Hide has ever done. Kaneki has a strong belief in his own uselessness and is frequently grateful for the aid of others, but it is a very rare occasion that someone would ever express gratitude towards him (and he enjoys the sensation so much that it initiates the hero complex that will determine his actions in the latter half of the manga).

By the end of the arc, Kaneki cares for Touka a great deal, offering her his shoulder to lean on and carrying through with it despite her protests - no longer phased by her scariness now that he has seen so much more of the real Touka.

He finds more similarities between Touka and herself when he finds out about Yoriko, and he is touched to find she is willing to risk her life for him - another thing that is extremely rare for Kaneki is for anyone to display care for his well-being.

It’s clear how difficult he finds it to register. Kaneki internally expresses worry for her well-being afterwards when she’s torn up about her inability to kill Kimi, and by this point, Touka has joined Hide in the highest echelons of Kaneki’s heart. Close, reciprocal relationships like those are so rare for Kaneki that they’re all the more precious for it. We see just how much he’s come to treasure her in the Aogiri Arc, when Ayato pays the price for it. Kaneki is fiercely, fiercely protective of her, all the more so after seeing the lengths she’s gone to for him, and as we all knew but Ch 122 confirmed, it’s his reason for leaving her behind. 

It’s difficult to pinpoint exactly where Kaneki’s feelings take a turn for the romantic, precisely because, in classic Kaneki emotional suppression mode, I doubt he’s aware of it himself. But I would definitely suggest that by the beginning of the Aogiri arc that flower has sprouted, and we see it throughout the second half of the manga in her prominent appearance in his thoughts - not to mention him going out of the way of his great quest to get her a birthday present.

The largest panel of all for Touka in Kaneki’s dying thoughts. When he finally saw her again, alive and well and waiting for him all this time in :re, even without any memories, he couldn’t help but cry.

3

Elsa invited Elizabeth to hang out at the Bluffs.

Elizabeth: “Jacobina asked me this evening if she could be a vegetarian.”

Elsa: “And? What did you say?”

Elizabeth: “Yes, of course. I can hardly force her to eat meat if she doesn’t want to. And at least Hope is still with us, so I don’t have to cook two separate meals, which is quite nice.”

Elsa: “I can’t believe how grown up she’s getting.”

Elizabeth: “She’s so headstrong and she knows what she wants already. I have to keep reminding myself that she’s only 6.”

megansarah11  asked:

I'm pregnant klaroline

I hope you forgive me for this prompt took on a life of it’s own and moves rather quickly. I’d also like to thank @that-wandering-belle, who helped me immensely last night in deciding whether or not I should post it. Thank you.

Please Enjoy and Happy Reading!

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Her lips were soft and tasted of the one glass of white wine she had for dinner, her body flush against his as they rocked against one another in the nearly empty apartment she had pulled him into.

“Is this place yours?” he had asked.

“Does it matter?’ she replied before sucking on his lip.


She was wild Klaus recalled, her movements reckless and her inhibitions very low. Now though she was panicking momentously and while he outwardly seemed composed he too was more than flustered, finding her again had not been part of the plan. After months, four to be exact, of thinking about her constantly like she was embedded in his skin he realized something.

Something he should have realized soon but he had been acting foolishly, wishing her presence in his mind away. Pushing the memory of her afterglow scent and the way his hands roved the plains of her body like molding a sculpture. He was never supposed to meet her, know her, and take her in the apartment that most definitely was not hers come to think of it.

Klaus had been in a neighboring town close to his pack with only a few wolves alongside him for protection when he had seen her. Enchanted he strode towards her asking her name only to have her rebuff him in front of his faction. He smirked enjoying her fire as she swiveled her hips with extra effort walking passed him, he turned ordering his wolves on a wayward errand leaving him to chase her alone.

He should have been focusing on the undertaking task of growing their parklands, the estate growing smaller with the pack only growing greater. They whole day had been about scouring the outlands to keep everyone close but far enough away that no one was breathing over the others shoulder, quite literally. He ignored this having mentally selected the areas he wanted to pursue finding a more stimulating challenge before him incased in a salacious blonde enigma.

His wolf longed to pounce and claim her as he followed her into the bar watching her give the same rebuff to another, lesser, man delighting him immensely. He slid into the stool besides her grinning as he waved to the spouting fool she had just finished annihilating. The blonde looked over at him with a turn of her neck riled at his sight but sitting down nonetheless.

He gazed at her amiably as he introduced himself, “Klaus,” as he waved away the bartender in a bid for more time alone with her, his wolf loathsome to share her attention.

Her lips pursed in consideration before finally parting, “Caroline,” she stated as their thighs brushed together provoking a feeling deep within his chest.


Now while he observed her spirited pacing by the kitschy rooster timer on the stove as she held the plastic stick in her hands she seemed dissimilar. Caroline was far removed from the devil may care attitude she had carried throughout their adventure some time ago. However Klaus was just as riveted in her manifestation, feeling more than deprived of her presence over the last few months.

She stopped spinning long enough that he got a good look at her frightened bright green eyes, the worrying of her teeth over her lip biting. He longed to pull her into his arms and tell her just what he was but he knew how poorly she would react. Even now hearing the resilient beat of a heart deep within her more than an indication that she was pregnant and he was most certainly the father, his ancestral blood calling to him.

Being a coward was not in his nature and already knowing the truth was a rather large determining factor so Klaus knew what he had to do. His hand reached out his fingers grasping hers brings her back to him in a moment that seemed to defy gravity and all of time and space. Like a pull and tug he seemed to center her, relax her enough to take a deep breath before he spoke.

His brain clouding as he struggled to gather the words it took to explain that he was not only a werewolf but an alpha, and as such he could choose his mate. That he had chosen her without thinking, had bit her and marked her for his own on their first and only night together. How the feelings he had within him may not be matched by her feelings and that she might despise him, where were the words to explain that?

“Caroline,” he paused, her name on his tongue for the first time in months, “Remember when we were drinking and I confessed some things?” he asked treading lightly.

Her eyes rolled as she tried to tug her hand away, “Like that the guys following you around like puppies couldn’t disobey but didn’t work for you? Yeah, why does that matter now?” she demanded.

“Exactly like that,” Klaus hesitated knowing she was looking for words of comfort but receiving this news instead, “Remember how when we were rolling on the floor and I bit you just there.”

His fingers brushed her neck feeling her shiver under his touch, “Klaus the timer is about to ring, please be getting to the point,” she pleaded with him.

“I’m actually a werewolf,” he spit out feeling her stiffen, “And I can hear them, alive, inside of you,” he gestured to her soft bump of her stomach.

The more he heard the repetitious beating sound, the more contented he became, “You are pregnant with my children,” he said as the timer rang gratuitously.

She reached for the timer, her grip powerful, shattering the sound until the plastic device all but disbanded, “Wolf? Wait, children? As in plural?” she squeaked.

He nodded, “It’s entirely possible it will be a multiple birth,” he admitted a little more contained then he had been moments ago realizing he might be distressing her instead of helping.

Caroline seemed to drop all pretenses in front of him, the possibly crazy stranger she had sex with four months ago regarding at him with immense panic, “Are you fucking saying that I am carrying your were-wolf pups?” she cried hugging her stomach.

Klaus took a step closer, probably a stupid idea, he thought as he ventured forward, “Well, they would be ours Love,” he answered back realizing much too late what a horrible reply that was.

“Has a werewolf ever been killed by a human with a frying pan,” she tested in turn reaching for the first pot or pan she could find instead reaching for the skillet nearby.

“This might be a first,” Klaus said reaching for the iron skillet in her hand wrestling it from her fearsome grasp only to push her body closer to his, their eyes locking and erratic breaths mingling.

“You’re insane, this is insane,” her voice, her mind seems scattered coming to a realization as her hand falls on her neck resting a top the small faded piecing of  his teeth that bleeds like a freckle into a wolf’s mate.

“And yet you believe me, don’t you?” he queried, his eyes searching hers only to find the unrelenting truth that she did, a sight that caused his chest to tighten with emotion.

“I do,” Caroline sighed resting her temple under his as he massaged her scalp, rubbing soft circles, “Stuff has happened. Like extra force power, eating meat, weird cravings and I find everything, um, poignant!”

“You’re saying you’re erotically charged?” he asked delicately feeling her body warm even further as he gazed deeply into her eyes. “It’s a side effect prominent in an Alpha’s mate or so I’ve heard.”

“Alpha as in leader of the pack,” Caroline cringed as he lifted her up to sit on the counter of her small kitchen holding her pliable body to his own. “Question. Am I a wolf too?”

“No, err, that would a more complicated matter.” Klaus replied as he wrapped her legs around his hips getting as close to her as his wolf could get. “I could turn you if you like but after with a scratch.”

“I mean, I don’t know. This is a lot to process in less than five minutes,” Caroline admitted to Klaus who could only concede her point.

“True, but for now, you should rest,” he replied lifting her up in his arms, “Bedroom?” he asked as she held onto his back her head resting over his shoulder.

“Left door,” she whispered, her lips tickling his neck as he moved in the direction she had designated pushing open her door, “Will you stay with me?”

Klaus’ wolf rebelled, “Of course, I won’t be going anywhere,” he promised her as he gently slid her out of his arms onto the bed.

“No I know that, I meant in bed with me,” she clarified with a simpering smile that had him crawling over her to rest on the other side of her frame.

“Come here,” he offered as she rolled onto her side fitting against him with an easy sigh as her hugged her body to him cradling her in a gentle embrace until he felt her breaths evening out.

He made an effort to stay awake, to watch over her as she slept, a pleasure he was denied on their first night but when her wayward hand clutched his shirt he felt an odd sense of release. A feeling of contentment heartening him as he pressed closer into her and shut his eyes finding his first true sleep in months.

2P America Boyfriend headcannons
  • wink, wink, nUDGE, NUDGE ;)
  • okay, first off, thIS CHILD OF SATAN-
  • Fuckboi
  • but actually really dorky when you get to know him
  • vEGAN
  • Won’t mind if you eat meat tho, just as long as u don’t force him to eat meat
  • Overprotective
  • Will punch a guy for even loOKING AT YOU-
  • Likes memes
  • what am I talking about? LOVES MEMES!
  • will send you a meme in the middle of the night
  • Rap music 👌🏽
  • good music taste tho
  • OUT ALL NIGHT CLUBBING
  • most likely to meet him in a club tho, no joke
  • will take you to baseball games
  • just go with him
  • it’ll make him happy :)
  • Will sing Hamilton with you
  • If ya get serious, he wiLL LOVE YOU-
  • Piggyback rides!
  • Remind him that you like/love him please
  • ya need to keep a calm temper
  • Bc this boy’s temper is OUT OF CONTROL
  • Be there for him
  • At least when you visit, Oliver will also give you cupcakes!
  • Occasionally, Matt will third wheel it with y’all
  • lots of flirting
  • maybe grab ur cake ;)
  • wear hiS SHIRTS
  • ALLEN JONES! BOOS!
What a Crown Takes IX

Originally posted by just-usmadd

Warnings: nudity kinda, profanity

Word count: 1,142

He dragged her only a few steps, before she pulled her hand from his grip.
“Don’t touch me!” She hissed as she backed away.
“Do you want to get lost again, and have Hux drag you back here to me?”
(Y/N) glared up at him. Kylo smirked smugly, and again took her hand in his.
“I didn’t say you could touch me!”
She tried to tug her hand out of his, only to find that his grip tightened as he let out a low growl. He continued on his way, causing the girl to stumble a few step before following him.
“Why am I here?”
“I found you intriguing.”
“That’s not the answer I was looking for.”
The emperor let out a small chuckle.
“And could you please let go of my hand.”
“No.”
Asshole
Kylo again chuckled.
“What’s so funny?”
“Nothing.”
Eventually, hey made it back to the room she woke up in.
“Well, since we both missed our dinner, I decided to have our meals brought to our room.”
He waved his hand, causing the doors to open to reveal the large chamber. He again began to lead them to the window, where a table and two chairs had been placed, apparently while she was away. Kylo led go of her hand to pull out her chair. She only glared at him.
“I’m not hungry.”
“Yes, you are.”
“No, I lost my appetite when you asked me to join you the first time.”
Kylo’s grip on the chair tightened. He went over to his chair and sat down. He then reached out a hand, and (Y/N) suddenly found herself being pulled, by some unseen force, into his lap.
“What the-”
She was stopped by a finger on her lips.
“Hush.”
She slapped his hand away, and continued to try and get up. Kylo’s grip tightened, and she found herself unable to move. She opened her mouth the speak, only to have a fork full of some sort of meat forced gently into her mouth. She sputtered and then spit out the morsel.
“What the-”
She found herself with another mouth full of meat. She glared up and him and reluctantly swallowed.
“Serio-”
Another mouthful.
She stopped talking after this, only glaring up at him
“Come on love, open up.”
She continued to only glare at him.
Kylo sighed, and before the girl could react, he had pinched her nose, causing her to open her mouth, and shoved another piece of food.
“Stop it!”
“Well are you going to eat by yourself?”
“Fine!”
Kylo allowed her to hop off his lap, and slink into her chair. She looked down at her food, and began to pick at it with her fork.
“You promised you would eat some.”
“I’m honestly not hungry.”
“You still need to eat.”
(Y/N) sighed and picked the fork back up and began to reluctantly eat. Kylo watched her take a few bites, before returning his focus to the food laid out before him.
———-
After they had finished eating, Kylo got up from his seat, and reached a hand out for (Y/N) to take. Again, she just glared at his hand, and moved to stand by herself. Kylo sighed, took her hand in his, and pulled them both in the direction he wanted to go.
“Where are we going now?”
“The gardens.”
Prefect chance to escape.
“I don’t think so love.”
How the-
“Your thoughts are quite loud dear.”
She froze in her tracks and pulled her hand out of his and backed away.
“(Y/N), get back over here now.”
How the hell does he know my name?
She shook her head and took backed away more. Kylo walked towards her, as she continued to back away. She turned around and took off down the halls, with a now, annoyed Kylo following her trail.
“Get back here!” He bellowed.
(Y/N) found herself, again, frozen in place and unable to move. Her breath caught in her throats as the emperor came up behind her, and scooped her into his arms. She was still conscience, but still unable to move, as he carried her to his intended location. (Y/N), with only limited visual to her surroundings, had no idea where they were going. Soon enough, however, she recognized the surroundings to be near her new prison.
“Now we can’t go to the gardens, now that I can’t trust you to that simple freedom.”
(Y/N) didn’t say anything, as he placed her on the bed, and allowed her to sit up.
“I will be right back, do not leave this spot.”
She simply glared at him, as he turned towards another set of doors. He heard him bark some orders through the doors, and soon he came back out with him in a robe, and carrying another over his forearm. He tossed it over to her.
“Put this on.”
“No.”
“Put. It. On.“
“I’m not getting undressed in front of you!”
Kylo sighed again and turned around.
“I’m still not putting this on.”
His hand clenched.
“I’m really trying to hold my temper (Y/N), I suggest you comply.”
“I really don’t give a shit if you’re ‘holding your temper’, I’m still not going near you in nothing but a damn robe on!”
Kylo turned around, his eyes full of rage, his face as red as a tomato.
“Put the goddamn robe on, so we can both enjoy a nice bath like an emperor and his empress should!”
“For the last time, I’m not you fucking empress!”
Kylo audibly growled, and charged towards her, threw her over his shoulder and stocked both of them through the doors he had previously come out of. He burst through the doors, and then threw the girl into the pool size tub of water. She came up for air coughing and sputtering as she tried to get her feet underneath her.
“You asshole!”
“That’s what happens when you test my temper darling.”
“Your fucking ‘temper’ gives you absolutely no goddamn excuse to through you so claimed ‘empress’ into a pool of water!”
“It would have been more relaxing if you had gotten in willingly.”
Kylo tugged off the strap that held the piece of cloth together, and let it drop to the floor. (Y/N) quickly looked away, and the now naked man getting into the bath.
“We’re going to see each other bare one day love, there’s no need to be embarrassed, now let’s get those-”
“Don’t touch me!” She slapped his reaching hands away.
“I promise I won’t do anything you don’t wish to do love, I just think it would be more comfortable  if you were out of your sopping wet clothes.”
“I would much rather be in my wet clothes, then be naked with you.”
Kylo sighed.
“Have it your way love.”

YFIP: “Damon” Albarn
  1. That’s not even his REAL name its Damebledorf Albarnicus 
  2. Pagan chimpanzee wizard man-child only ages in Golden Retriever dog years
  3. IS AN ARIES. sad. tragic.
  4. Taught Harry Potter everything he knows and that is why it took Harry so long to defeat the dark lord bc Damebledorf Albarnicus was kicked out of wizarding school for drinking his own love potion
  5. this is why he’s in love with himself
  6. Patronus is a stoned monkey dressed like a sea captain
  7. Will buy gold tooth but will not buy new clothes
  8. Does not know how to laundry this is FACT coz all his shirts are DIRTY n wears same underwear like every concert???
  9. Chronic swamp ass
  10. Once put poop tooth bacK INTO his mouth
  11. Makes me ask him “Do you kiss your mother with that mouth?!” 
  12. The answer is yes, he KISSES people with his pOOP MOUTH
  13. Mean to Alex James very not nice bc Alex James is a beautiful princess
  14. Obsession with socks but his feet so so smelly???? Does not know how to shower tbh has never heard of soap
  15. Once said something mean about the Beastie Boys and I will never forgive him for that like ummmmmm you once wrote a song about shoe shine sooooooooo how come u judge???? no one cares about cool shoe shines buddy
  16. Dresses like zombie on halloween to cover up the fact that he is actually dead
  17. veins have been surgically replaced with guitar strings i know bc i was the doctor on call the night he came in
  18. still a virgin
  19. doesn’t know how to read just memorized a lot of words
  20. jeans too baggy so he can cover up his 8 penis’
  21. that;s why his nickname used to be “octopenis”
  22. Ludacris only fills cups like DD’s bc Damon taught him how
  23. Nose too cute?????? ILLEGAL AND RUDE.
  24. cannot invite him to your party otherwise he will just come over and lay on your couch and wipe his tears with deli meat while forcing everyone to listen to Adam Ant
  25. Looks like a homeless pencil
Headcanon #1

Kraglin is a vegetarian. He hides this away from his crew because really, these guys consider a species not eating any kind of flesh weak and Kraglin prefers not to seem weak to anyone. So most of the time he just doesn’t eat anything, acting like he isn’t hungry just so he isn’t forced to eat meat in front of his crew mates. Probably only Yondu knows and probably peter, since this little shit notices a hell lot of things.

Expect the Unexpected

The title is crappy, but I couldn’t come up with anything really.

Jurassic World one-shot, Owen Grady x FemaleReader

Rated: uh… PG-13, no dirtiness in her folks, sorry, maybe next time

Word Count: 2039 (okay, so it wasn’t a quickie haha)

Based on a headcanon I sent in to im-an-octopus:

“When raptor squad starts bringing scraps to bae, Owen realizes she may be pregnant.”

I wrote this in a day without a beta, so please excuse any spelling errors.  It is definitely unpolished material. Let me know how you like it!

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