So I was wondering if you could write a fluffy analogical fic? I really don't have an idea for what exactly I want, I just love the ship lol - Hazelwood Anon <3
I FINISHED IT! This is soooo late, but I hope you like it anyway! Also just for the record, wrapping someone in bubble wrap will not prevent them from getting injured. Yes, I speak from experience
Logan was beginning to get concerned.
Two months ago, he had finally worked up the courage to ask Anxiety out on a date, and much to his relief and delight, the other had said yes. They had been together ever since. And their relationship was going well. They enjoyed each others company, went on multiple pleasant outings, and found activities to share together. Although Logan still maintained that kissing your opponent during a debate counted as cheating.
With all the time they now spent together, it was only natural that they would become more aware of the quirks and habits of the other. For the most part, Logan enjoyed this. He loved learning new things about Anxiety. Like the way he always had to sleep with his arms curled up around something, be it a stuffed animal, pillow, or person. Or the way he’d hum absentmindedly when absorbed in a task.
However, one of the things he’d learned worried Logan immensely. Anxiety, as it turned out, was incredibly clumsy, and he was going to give Logan an heart attack. It seemed as though every day he had a new bump, bruise, or scratch, and whenever Logan tried to fuss over them, Anxiety just waved him off, claiming he “had just tripped down the stairs, no big deal.”
Logan disagreed. Minor clumsiness would be ignorable, but Anxiety took it to an extreme that left Logan sure he was going to get himself seriously injured some day. He could not allow that to happen. So, he had come up with a list of possible solutions.
At heart, a man of science, Logan was eager to test each possibility and learn which one functioned best. He was sure that with this experimentation, he would find a way to prevent his boyfriend from getting any future injuries.
The first item on his list was simple: keep a hold of Anxiety. Theoretically, as long as Logan had a hand on him, or even was within arms reach, he should be able to prevent any accidents.
For the next two days, Logan stuck to Anxiety like glue, hovering over him everywhere he went. So far, it seemed to be working. Anxiety had almost tripped a few times, but Logan had been able to catch him each time.
They were sitting on the couch together, Logan keeping one eye on Anxiety as he carefully reviewed his notes on the experiment. Then there was a call from Morality.
“Logan,” he said, “Do you think you could come help me in the kitchen? I’m making stew and it would go faster with a set of helping hands.”
Logan hesitated. He didn’t want to tell Morality no, but if he was busy cooking there was no way he’d be able to react fast enough to any incidents.
Anxiety looked at him and rolled his eyes. “Just go already,” he huffed. “You’ve been stupidly clingy for the past two days. It’s been fun, but I assure you, we can stand to be apart for twenty minutes.”
Logan frowned. “If you’re sure-“ he began.
Anxiety cut him off, now starting to sound annoyed. “Yes, I’m sure. What’s up with you?”
Not wanting to get into the specifics of his experiment at that moment, Logan just sighed and said, “Alright. I’ll return within the hour. Please do not leave the couch during that time.”
“Whatever you say, babe,” Anxiety shrugged. “I’ve got no reason to move.”
As satisfied as the situation allowed, Logan moved to the kitchen, greeting Morality with a nod. Beginning to chop up the vegetables needed, he reassured himself mentally. Anxiety would be fine.
However, just as all the ingredients had been tossed in and the stew left to simmer, Logan heard a thump coming from the common room.
A sense of dread filling him, he called out, “Anxiety?”
“I’m fine,” came the rather muffled reply, “I was just twisting to try and reach the remote and I fell off the couch.”
Logan sighed, and pulled out his notebook.
Idea successful when implemented, but cannot be kept up continuously. Must be executed in conjunction of another solution.
Snapping his notebook shut, he adjusted his glasses. Further experimentation was required.
His next experiment required a bit of coaxing to pull off. Logan’s theory was that if he couldn’t always be around to prevent incidents, perhaps he could teach Anxiety to be less clumsy, so he could prevent them himself. His suggested method for doing so: yoga.
By increasing Anxiety’s balance and flexibility, as well as creating a stronger awareness of his body placement, Logan hoped to decrease his clumsiness significantly. The trick was getting Anxiety to agree.
In the end, he had to bribe Anxiety with promises of making his favorite cookies later, but Logan had gotten him to go along with it. Now they were both following along to an instructional video Logan had found on YouTube.
Logan sneaked a glance at Anxiety who had his head hanging down in downward dog. While Anxiety had complained the entire time, he’d still gone through the poses.
Right then as if on cue, Anxiety lifted his head.
“Are we almost done,” he grumped. “This is boring.”
“Not much longer,” Logan promised, “But don’t you find this relaxing?”
Anxiety shrugged. “Mostly I just feel stupid,” he said, “But whatever.”
Logan smiled at him fondly. “I assure you, you don’t look stupid,” he replied. “And I hope you’ll be amenable to joining me again in the future.”
“I’ll think about it,” Anxiety conceded, and from his experience with the darker side, Logan knew that meant yes. He ducked his head to contain his smile of triumph.
A comfortable silence settled between then, only broken by the instructor in the video. Logan was pleased. As a whole, he was confident he could mark this experiment as a success. But then, as they were going into the warrior pose, it happened.
As they moved to balance on one leg, Anxiety wobbled, his arms flailing frantically, trying to stay upright. And faster than Logan could catch him, he pitched forward.
Logan abandoned his mat, kneeling at Anxiety’s side.
“Are you alright?” he asked worriedly. It didn’t look like a bad fall, but with Anxiety you never knew.
Anxiety sat up. “Yeah,” he muttered. “I’m okay. Think I might have landed on my wrong on my wrist though.”
Logan took the wrist in question and frowned at it.
“You might have sprained it,” he said, “Here, let’s get some ice.”
As they moved to the kitchen, Logan mentally revised his conclusion.
Experiment had some initial positive results, but is not an immediate solution. May produce desired results in future, but not for some time.
Logan took a breath and stepped back. There he was done.
His last two experiments had been centered on Anxiety’s actions, seeking to change them to prevent injuries. As those had failed to produce the results he needed, he had switched tactics, by changing the environment so injury was impossible.
Essentially, he had baby-proofed the house.
Every sharp edge had been covered in foam. he had installed a gate at the top of the stairs, and special handgrips on the bannister. It was perfect. Now he just had to wait for Anxiety to wake up so it could be tested.
“What. The. Hell.”
Ah, there he was.
Logan turned to beam at his boyfriend, who was looking unusually angry.
“Anxiety,” he said cheerfully, “Salutations!”
“Don’t you salutations me” Anxiety growled, “What the fuck is this shit?”
“I can only assume you’re referring to the preventative measures I’ve installed in the house,” Logan said, fidgeting with his glasses nervously.
“Is that what those are?” Anxiety spluttered, “What the hell are you trying to prevent?”
Logan’s brow furrowed. Perhaps Anxiety was unaware of the severity of his clumsiness.
“Well,” he began, “My hope is that they will prevent any further injuries to your person, by neutralizing objects that could be hazardous to your health.”
“I’m not a fucking infant,” Anxiety spat, “I don’t need you to treat me like one!”
“Yes, you are! For god’s sake, there’s a goddamn baby gate on the stairs!”
Anxiety seemed very upset. Perhaps he had miscalculated. Logan opened his mouth to apologize, but before he could, Anxiety spun around and began walking away from him.
“You know what, whatever” he said, turning back to glare at Logan. “I’ll be in my room”
Logan’s eyes widened. “Wait, Anxiety, look out of that-“
There was a thump, then cursing.
“… wall.” Logan sighed. It seemed his efforts had been for naught. And he doubted Anxiety would let them remain for much longer anyway.
Experiment result: utter failure.
So Logan may have been getting slightly desperate.
In his defense, nothing else seemed to be working. Having failed to stop accidents as they happened, and preventing them from happening in the first place, he had decided to to try and make sure that Anxiety would at least walk away from them uninjured.
To accomplish this, he had wrapped Anxiety in bubble wrap.
Thankfully the other side was such a deep sleeper, or he never would have been able to pull it off. So while the other had been snoozing away, Logan had wrapped his limbs, torso, and head in bubble wrap. he had left his eyes, mouth and nose uncovered though.
He took a minute to smile fondly at his still sleeping boyfriend. Anxiety was rather adorable like this. As if able to hear his thoughts, Anxiety grumbled a little in his sleep, his eye beginning to flutter. As he began to stir, his movements caused some the bubbles to pop, the sound of which seemed to rouse Anxiety faster.
He sat up and stared at his arms in confusion.
“…what?” he slurred, still half asleep.
Logan chuckled. “I’ll explain when you’re awake,” he promised. “Wait here, I’ll go and get breakfast.”
With that he ducked out of the room. he and made cinnamon roll french toast, one of Anxiety’s favorites. He hoped that the bribe of food would convince the other to keep the bubble wrap on.
When he came back into the room, Anxiety had gotten out of bed, and was staring at himself in the mirror and confusion.
“Logan,” he said, “Why am I covered in bubble wrap?”
Logan hesitated, setting the plates down. “I wanted to prevent you from getting hurt,” he said softly. “I know it seems ridiculous to you, but your propensity for getting injured is truly worrisome. So please, indulge me?”
“You’re really serious about this aren’t you,” Anxiety said, sounding resigned.
Logan nodded, feeling a bit hopeful. Would Anxiety actually agree?
“Fine,” the other grumbled. “I’ll do it. For today.”
Logan smiled. “Thank you,” he said, “Now come sit on the bed, I made French toast.”
Anxiety began to waddle over to him, but it was clear the the bubble wrap was encumbering his movements. Logan reached out to assist him, but before he could, Anxiety slipped and fell. Right into the edge of the bookcase.
Frustrated and worried, Logan pulled him up. “Any bruises?” he asked, hoping the answer was no.
“Maybe,” Anxiety winced. “Turns out bubble wrap doesn’t do much against sharp things.”
Logan frowned. It seemed this too had failed, and now he was out of ideas!
Seeing the distress on his face, Anxiety reached towards him.
“Hey babe, Logan” he said gently. “Don’t feel bad. It didn’t work, so what? I’m still okay.”
“I just hate seeing you injured,” Logan confessed, “Even in minor incidents such as this”
“Yeah, I know,” Anxiety said, “But you can’t prevent everything. And you know what, the only thing that really matters is that you’re here to help patch me up afterwords. Yeah?”
“I suppose,” Logan replied uncertainly.
“You know I’m right,” Anxiety said, no room for argument in his voice. “Now seriously, help me get out of this bubble wrap.”
As Logan began to untangle him, he turned Anxiety’s words over in his minds. Perhaps it didn’t matter if he couldn’t prevent every accident. Maybe it really was enough to be there to help with the aftermath.
Logan smiled to himself, as he and his now unwrapped boyfriend sat on the bed to eat their breakfast together. He would just have to make sure he was always there.
(He’d still be looking for solutions to Anxiety’s clumsiness though)