for being as out of shape as i am

On Calm

I feel as though lately the shape of my consciousness change. My priorities have shifted, and I’ve noticed in retrospect a gravitation toward calm and peace, in stark contrast to the busyness and calamity that I would often seek out in my twenties.

I think I read somewhere, someone more eloquent than I am, saying something along the lines of art being a way of realising yourself, manifesting yourself, and I think I kind of get it now in the kind of way some lessons can only be learnt through experience not words. Things have been very different for me internally since the Fever exhibition, which although unseen by most people, was probably one of the most significant creative breakthroughs I’ve had as an artist since I started drawing these images. 

I think I spent a long time seeking out chaos as a distraction from looking any deeper inside myself, or at least I didn’t understand myself yet. Filling my time with busy work, attention rattling around from project to project. I remember in a drunken haze outside a convenience store confiding in my friend Sonny (also an artist) that my work was too inconsistent, too all over the place, but it was all I knew how to do. I got bored so easily, I couldn’t stick with one thing. At that point I had been doing music videos, art direction, styling, on top of my art and illustration stuff. The illustration projects began to carve out my identity for me, taking it in indeliberate directions, I felt powerless to define myself, there was nothing connecting everything, and the confusion was depressing. I would console myself with the mantra I learnt from my Honours year at art school, that the only way to understand the work was to keep making the work, but the more I made the more confusing it was, more directions, more odd socks.

Fever was the first time I’ve managed to understand my world somewhat - the feeling, the mood, where the characters come from. Fever tied together several orphaned works and ideas over the past several years and gave them a world to live in, yet there is just enough mystery, just enough that I still don’t know, to keep things interesting. I see more now than I ever did, I have a new clarity, the ideas just pour out, I’m excited, Fever has made me calm.

As I’ve gone through life I’ve closed a few doors. I feel as though I’ve done my time as the stressed and busy artist archetype, it was aging me, making me an asshole, and gave me validation from the wrong places. When you’re an artist and literally creating your own world, it’s easy to attribute any success to your work and your own doing, which is true, but not the whole truth, because by that same association when bad things happen you begin to think it’s because of you also. 

When the spotlight moves (and it does) from you to someone else, or a different trend entirely, you think it’s you not working hard enough, when you’re depressed you think it’s your fault because your work isn’t good enough, when in fact so much is actually out of your control. Failure can be out of your control, and so can success. I still remember people thinking I was on some kind of hiatus during the busiest and backbreaking years of my life.

I’ve both been and been on the receiving end of the tortured busy artist archetype, I’ve hurt people because I’ve been that person, and been hurt by people like that. It makes me gag now. Everyone gets to a point where they think they’re working harder than anyone else, it makes them feel better, they lose empathy, and feel justified in their arrogance. It’s an unfortunate part of success that I’ve noticed time and time again, and each small success validates a lot of shitty behaviour.

Sometimes I wonder if this newfound calm and aversion for all things stressful and chaotic is going to hinder me somewhat though. The same way a dog bred for dogfighting only survives by staying mad and aggressive. This is a doubt I actually have quite often despite how convinced I might sound so far that I’m on the right path with this newfound calm.

I know calm doesn’t sound as cool as chaos but for now I’m choosing to value people, friendships, and my health both physical and emotional. I want the negative space for ideas to flow, I want peace to make my work, I want insightful conversations with friends, I want a body that I can take to being 150, and I don’t want to feel sad for no reason all the time. My priorities for now are in building this Fever universe further, rather than seeking out busyness as a distraction and a vain perception of personal growth.

Found a “fan” page dedicated to “White Storm”...

And I am in utter disbelief. Storm is a proud African woman. Being African is a huge part of her personality, who she is, what has shaped her into the person she has become. To whitewash her is to pretty much strip away everything she is on top of being RACIST AS FUCK! And they had to nerve to say and I quote because I can’t make up such fuckery, “Imagine how pretty she’d be if she was white”. EXCUSE THE FUCK OUT OF ME. White hair and blue eyes against ebony skin isn’t pretty? Ororo means beauty! (I bet they refuse to refer to her by her actual name.) In canon men like the likes of Thor, Loki, T’Challa, Dr. Doom, Dracula, Cable, Quicksilver, and Wolverine just to name a few have shown interest in her. But she isn’t pretty to you because she’s black?

Tell me

Storm isn’t

STUNNING

She is a strong, gorgeous, black woman in a comic verse that already greatly lacks diversity and yet, you hate that she is black. To the creator of that blog (which I will not name here, because they don’t deserve the attention) the artists doing white rendering of her and your followers you should be embarrassed, you ignorant, bigoted peasant. 

Originally posted by heckyeahreactiongifs

When we came to make Zombies, Run!, I deliberately put a line in the very first mission, when you, Runner Five, are just arriving at Abel Township, the tiny, shivering remnant of humanity left after the zombie apocalypse. I had one of the characters say: “If you can move above a slow shamble, we can use you.” Why? Because I am so sick and tired of the best and nicest exercise-based treats being reserved for people who are already in peak physical shape, and I’m sick of the notion that having fun while exercising is something you have to earn; that, until you look a certain way, moving ought to be boring and unpleasant if not outright painful. Your body is there right now. You did not have to earn a thing. It is a gift. You are a hero every time you step out of your front door to do some exercise.
2

So it’s Tummy Tuesday I know but please bare with me…. there’s a bit of a story with these.

I wanna thank @valykas for posting something a few days ago that really hit a nerve with me. He posted some stuff about body positivity and being called out for basically not having the right to promote it coz people thought he was too hot etc. After a chat with him it made me realise that up till these pics I’ve always tried to find the right angle to hide my belly or make it look smaller. I’ve posted what I thought people wanted to see and not necessarily who I actually am.

People of all shapes and sizes have the right to be or not be happy with how they look.

I might lose followers coz of these pics and this rant but it’s me, plain and simple. Sorry for going on 😔

HAPPY TUMMY TUESDAY

Scooby and Shaggy are pretending to be a monster and mad scientist.

Nothin’ too weird about that. I’m on board so far.

It starts to get a little weird, though, when in a closeup Shaggy asks Scooby to hop up on the table…

…and next second when we cut back to the wide shot, Scooby’s abruptly on top, and is shaped reeeaaaally strangely.

It’s too bad they didn’t show him getting up, though. I’d like to see them animate the process of a large, clumsy cartoon dog climbing onto a freely-rolling gurney with no support.

Then, once again between cuts, Scooby goes from the strap being off him–

–to him being strapped down, all without Shaggy’s help. 

Not a huge thing, but it would be awfully hard for him to strap himself in, and seems a little out-of-character for fearful ol’ Scoob to do.

…where am I going with this post, you ask? Oh, well, it was mostly just to point out that…

…when the monster comes back…

…Shaggy immediately ditches strapped-in Scooby without a second thought.

look guys I drew DIGITALLY.

here’s some Blitzbee~ I really felt like drawing them since theres not a lot being made out there, so, here I am contributing to the shit ship that I fell into

I’m a little out of shape with digital, school has really been keeping busy from posting on here XD Enjoy!

4

“I never apologise for things I have said. But if I do, I take the coward’s way out and do it at 2:07am in the hopes that no-one sees it.”

“You’re so out of shape.”
“You have so much potential; it’s a pity you’re just wasting it.” —-things my father told me, growing up, coupled with forced workouts.
🔹🔹🔹
My relationship with fitness is a complicated one. Due to associating a lot of trauma with it, I have despised exercise for most of my life.
______
It wasn’t until transition that I started exploring fitness options that I enjoyed vs. ones that I had grown up being forced to participate in. 🏋🏽🚶🏽💪🏽 This is a process; I still have a ton of self-confidence issues when it comes to working out. I actually am mostly unable to go to public gyms, due to anxiety.

However, every time I work out, about halfway through what I’m doing, my mood improves. I feel more connected with my body, with the movements, with the rhythm, & with the fact that I am CHOOSING this. Slowly, it’s helped me to develop a more positive perspective.
I’m still working on things; I’m nowhere near as positive-minded in relation to fitness as I would like to be. However, many folks in this community have helped me. A LOT.
______
It’s important to know that others are, more often than not, here to help you & support you….not compete with you, or beat you down.
I’m glad for the friends I have made, and the improved mind-body connection I am developing. I hope, as I continue down this path, I am finally able to relax and have fun. 🐾💕👌🏽

2

Hello. My name is Jacob. I am 25 years old and come from Centerville, Ohio. I am a very laid back person and am looking for someone special to communicate with. Prior to being locked up, I was a professional MMA fighter and had a very successful fighting career. Because of that, I continue to work out daily and have maintained being in very good physical shape.

I have been in prison for eight months and have four years to go. There is a possibility that my time here could be shortened, as I have an appeal in process. I would enjoy hearing from you. You can message me at JPay.com or send me a letter.  If you do use JPay.com, please be sure that you include your contact information is inside the body of the message or I will not receive the information.

Thank you again and please use the contact information below to get with me and if you JPay me (we can send each other emails through JPAY), please be sure that your contact information is in the body of the email or I won’t be able to write you back.

Astrological Sign:Virgo
Correspond Overseas:Yes
Date of Birth:9/11/1991
Religion:Non-denominational
Relationship Status: Single

Jacob Alhashimi #A718143
ODRC
State Route 56 SW/P O Box 69
London, OH 43140 USA

leinajanson  asked:

Could u please do 5 with Dan please??? I love ur bolg!!!💙

I just want to state for the record I am in no way baby crazy right now. I have just been baby crazy in my writing.

5. “If you walk out that door… don’t you ever come back”

Giving birth is one of the most magical things on earth. You’re bringing a person into the world that you will shape and care for and love. That being said the act of giving birth sucks big balls. You had been dreading this day since the moment you had found out you were pregnant. The thought of pushing a baby from out of your vagina was less than exciting. You had been going through labour for eight hours and you were tired. At one point you asked Dan if you could just go home and deal with it later. He for some reason said no so you had to continue on. You had been told you weren’t dilated enough and that they would come look again in another half hour.

You had closed your eyes and laid back to try and calm yourself down a little when you heard Dan’s chair. He was moving it away from your bed stealing his hand away. You cracked open one eye to see what he was up to. When you looked you saw he was heading toward the door.

“What are you doing?” Dan froze as he turned to look at you.

“I was going to go and get a drink.” He looked guilty as all hell.

“I swear to god that if you are leaving to go get food that I will murder you. ” Dan smiled and then quickly hid it as he saw that you were not kidding.

“Babe you know the doctor said you can’t eat. you’re too close to delivery.” Dan continued slowly backing to the door as you gave him the death glare.

“If you walk out that door… don’t you ever come back.“ dan knew it was an empty threat probably due to lack of sleep and pain.

“I promise I won’t eat it here.” and with that Dan snuck off to got get something to eat.

Other prompt list

Throughout the last episode I suddenly started wondering if Joy has PCOS.  She has, like, all the visible symptoms - carries her weight around her middle, round face regardless of weight, acne along the jawline.  That could just be her build (none of her sisters seem to have that build, nor Michelle, but maybe Amy and/or Deanna do/does?) and back luck (the acne looks seriously painful and takes me back to my miserable teen years). 

And for lack of a better descriptor, she just has the overall look.  I have nine million things wrong with my reproductive system and am surrounded by people with various endocrine problems; PCOS being a pretty common one.  Her overall appearance just pings my “Hello fellow jacked-up ovary person” radar.  Of course she could also just be a girl who doesn’t have the common body shape in her family and bad luck with acne (god knows that entire family breaks out nonstop, although she’s the only one whose breakouts seem especially concentrated in that area).  And obviously I’m not a doctor. 

The only reason that I bring this up is that it can significantly impact fertility, which could either be a huge relief or completely devastating.  

anonymous asked:

How is Juulna doing?

I reached out to Juulna and she asked me to post this:

I’m doing well, thanks nonny! I miss everyone, but the time off, recovering from being hacked, has been good for me. I’ve been focusing on my health and home, and have been trying to wrangle my thesis into shape! I also got a cutie basset hound puppy and am delighted by her every day. :) I’m also thoroughly enjoying brainstorming for an original fiction concept in my spare time, and am very very excited to be exploring this aspect of my creativity. But dang! Creating original characters is hard! ;D

Thank you so much for asking after me, and thanks to Perry for being an amazing friend and allowing me to answer this myself. xoxo, Juulna

An Open Letter to Pan-Holmesian Fandom: Elementary is Not Your Punch Line

I listen to a lot of podcasts these days.  When I moved a few months ago, my commute went from being five minutes to being an hour and a half, one way.  Since I spend a lot of time stuck in traffic, quietly (or, you know, not so quietly) hating that one driver who decides to go 5mph in a 35mph zone, I listen to podcasts, because they keep me focused on something other than my irritation at every other driver on the road.  (Look, I’m not saying I have road rage.  I’m saying I have perfectly understandable road frustration that might come across as wrathful.)

Given that my two big interests in life are theatre and Sherlock Holmes, I naturally listen to a lot of podcasts about those two subjects.  And even then, it’s mostly Sherlock Holmes- I work in a theater almost every night and every weekend, sometimes I don’t want my volunteer job to follow me home!  And while listening to podcasts (and reading lots of blogs, because my job isn’t always fast paced and I gotta entertain myself somehow), I’ve noticed a very frustrating trend among those that are pan-Holmesian, and that’s to bash Elementary at every opportunity they get.

Keep reading

I feel like any anti who tries to take Shaladin art to the police will be shot down so badly.

Anti: *storms into the police station* This person made disgusting art of a minor and an adult, and you should arrest them for being a pedophile!
Officer: Okay… do you have any evidence? Did they actively try to seek out a child to harm?
Anti: No, but they post these disgusting pictures on their tumblr blog! *pulls out Shaladin art*
Officer: …*looks at them* You… You’re serious?
Anti: Yes, this person posts child pornography, and you should arrest them immediately!
Officer: This isn’t against the law, though, these people are not real in any way, shape or form. Please come back when you have, I dunno, ACTUAL evidence of REAL LIFE people.
Anti: Well… Well, I see one of them as being underage!
Officer  …Sir/ma’am, please get out of here, we have way bigger problems to deal with.
Anti: *throws a hissy fit about the officer being a pedophile supporter and condoning ‘child pornography’*
Officers: *laugh their asses off at how ridiculous the anti was being*

Girlfriend Wanted
— 

Matthew Gray Gubler

must love decorating for holidays
mischief
kissing in cars
and wind chimes

no specific height
weight
hair color
or political affiliation required
but would prefer a warm spirited non racist

cynics
critics
pessimists
and “stick in the muds” need not reply

voluptuous figures a plus

any similarity in look, mind set, or fashion sense to
mary poppins
claire huxtable
snow white
or elvira wholeheartedly welcomed

i am dubious of actresses, fellons, and lesbians
but dont want to rule them out entirely

must be tolerant of whistling
tickle torture
james taylor
and sleeping late

i have a slight limp
eerily soft hands
and a preternatural love of autumn

I once misinterpreted being called a coal-eyed dandy as a compliment when it was intended as an insult

I wiggle my feet in my sleep
am scared of the dark
and think the Muppets Christmas Carol is one of the greatest films of all time

all i want is
butterfly kisses in the morning
peanut butter sandwiches shaped like a heart
and to make you smile until it hurts

excali-bear  asked:

Hi~! Can I get a match up? I'm 5'2 and have long light brown hair and blue eyes. I'm pretty in shape, thanks to my horses. I am a hunter jumper (a kind of of horseback riding), and spend a lot of my time out at the barn. My other free time goes towards video games, anime or reading, I'm also a pretty decent student who rarely gets below an 85%. I am also guilty of being a people pleaser, I tend to go WAY out of my way to make people smile. I am pretty exciteable and happy most of the time c:

I ship you with Bokuto Koutarou!

Bokuto is always trying to make you smile and he really doesn’t like it when you’re not.  And while he does have his mood swings he always perks up whenever he sees you.  He’s very open with how affectionate he is with you and how he always wants to have your attention, while he knows he can’t always have it he really does try.

Bokuto is clueless when it comes to horses so he’s always asking you a lot of questions.  He does like to watch you ride, and even asks you on several occasions for you to teach him.  Anything that involves school Bokuto is most likely going to be asking you for help, since he knows that you’re really smart.

This blog believes ANYONE can be a healthy weight and in shape AND everyone should strive to do so. This blog does not believe in there is any reason someone can't lose weight. This blog believes in loving your body enough to take care of it.

•you are not some special case that can’t lose weight, I promise.
•Calories in VS Calories out.
•I have PCOS & Insulin Resistance and I’m losing weight.
•Eat right, exercise, lose weight.

Stop making excuses for being fat. You CAN change and be healthy.

I wanted to test out two styles or coloring ideas, and figured why not draw Deadpool? Since I’m so excited for the movie finally being a reality. So here is the full thing (and yeah, I threw in the pipe like in the pre-trailer trailer because I wasn’t sure what else to have him do).

So here are the two ideas I tried capturing in the coloring technique: taking some of the solid black shadows (and some lines) and making them a darker red/darker color than the flat color… just to make it “blend” a bit more while still being a solid shape; the other idea being to use the add glow layer for highlights more. It’s so common in comic coloring, and yet I hardly think to utilize it, so here I finally tried it out.

I want to post a small guideline for coloring this soon, because I am quite happy with how this turned out.

(Deadpool belongs to Marvel and not me, of course.)

Brooke Hernando, Dixxie Mae Graphics, 2015. Do not steal or use this work without credit and permission.

Aisha had been experimenting with her Morphix powers, trying to create a ball of it as she concentrated to transform the shape into a spherical shape. She was just beginning to get the handle of it, until it unfortunately began to go out of control and land on the nearest individual that was near her. As the person began to be splattered with a myriad of water, her eyes lit up with alarm as she rushed over to them, apologies streaming out of her mouth as she exclaimed, “I am so sorry, I didn’t mean to do that!”