food food food i want food

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Day 8 of an 10 day trip is halfway over. 1 km run this morning with a 6:31 time (7 second improvement, will take it).
Lunch has been healthy every day…today is peppers, fruit, hummus, and a seven grain salad.
Cannot WAIT to get home. Canada is ok, my colleagues are funny and nice to qork with, but my boss is a dick and I miss my family.

it’s so weird hearing americans talk about Target© as some kind of semi-religious holy space of reasonably priced goods and services, bc in it’s short, fever-dream existence up here in the frozen north it was… Not Good. 

in my experience with the three (3) i went to in the surrounding area it was. uh. you know when you step into a place and there’s nothing immediately noticeably wrong but you can just Feel that this is a Bad Space? like the kind of space where if you catch a glimpse of your mother walking down an aisle and turning a corner you know it’s a demonic trick and if you follow her it’ll lead you down a path to a dark space you can’t return from?

or you go in with your friend who’s right next to you but you get a text from them saying “hey i’m in the shoe aisle, you should come here” and you know it’s a trap from the devil? like other things:

  • only half of the dim, washed out, often flickering fluorescent lights were lit at any given time, usually only every-other set, leaving these valleys of darkness that made entire aisles inaccessible for fear of shadow people latching on to your soul like a dark passenger. 
  • entire sections were just Empty. empty shelves with no product, never any employees filling them up, no boxes waiting to be unpacked, no signs saying what should be there.
  • no employees at all actually? wandering around the store even though the parking lots were full and you walked in with a group of 20 or so felt so lonely. you could walk the whole place and it was dead silent and the only other “people” around always were several aisles away with their back turned, unmoving. there was always only one cashier and there was never anyone in her line.
  • there was never any music on or announcements played? another place that does this are all the dollar trees in my area and it gives me anxiety. i feel like i’m being hunted, like i have to hold my breath and listen for the footsteps of beasts in other aisles. 
  • the fitting rooms had a strange, dark energy to them. it felt like if you ever used them, whatever universe you closed the door on would not be the same one you stepped out into when you were done. the washrooms also contained this same dark energy.
  • passing the employees-only doors felt like wandering too close to a bears den. the glass windows never showed anything going on back there, no racks of product, no employees milling around. it was just pitch black, complete darkness. a hungry void.
  • leaving a target was the same disorienting feeling as leaving a dark theatre and exiting into the light. sound and colour and feeling rush back in. you feel like you can breathe again. a weight is lifted from your shoulders. you can’t remember any of the time you spent inside the target.

it is my sincere belief that the targets in canada never existed. the storefronts were put up, yes, but the stores themselves were vast empty caverns filled with dark dreams and sinister interlopers attracted to the malignant leftover energies from zellers. passing through the automatic doors was meant to teleport us to the nearest american location, but something went wrong and we entered an unnatural zone halfway between the upside down and whatever it was that happened in the langoliers. 

i believe the balls outside target are carefully crafted and powerfully attuned magical artifacts that keep up the illusion known as Target©, but were incorrectly spaced in canada due to a mixup between the metric and imperial systems of measurement, and that is why the brief twilight zone episode that was canadian target collapsed virtually overnight.

Soft boys in flower crowns, this must be heaven (ᅌᴗᅌ✿) 

(Please, do not repost)

  • Ravenclaw (right after they've graduated hogwarts): You know now, as far as society is concerned, we're adults.
  • Hufflepuff: Yes! Isn't it exciting?
  • Ravenclaw: Adults who have to make their own decisions about their lives.
  • Hufflepuff: It's so freeing, isn't it?
  • Ravenclaw: I have no idea what I'm doing and I want to go back to school.
  • Hufflepuff: ...
  • Ravenclaw: I don't want to do classes or anything, I just want someone to cook for me and tell me when meals are so I don't forget and basically be able to ignore life's responsibilities.
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Ok, but hear me out: Pidge and Matt spending time in Italy with their grandma and she makes them very embarassing sweaters and tons of lasagne.

So I recently got my ultralight wheelchair and smart drive. And in the smart drive like, product video it shows this guy zipping through the grocery store with wheelchair and smart drive and so today I was like “I gotta try that!!!”.

So I was grocery shopping and testing this out, and it was working super well!! So I’m just zooming around the store doing my shopping with my wheelchair and grocery cart and wearing my little mermaid fishscale tights. Because they’re awesome and my favorite and when I sit in the enterprise which is the name of my wheelchair, the little seashells on my knee show up. And I’m going to point out at this point in the story that I have been approached by full grown adults asking me if they were tattoos, so yeah these tights make it look like I’ve got some scales going on.

And then there was this kid in a bright pink Minnie Mouse dress who was staring at me. And I mean SERIOUSLY STARING to the point where the kid was lagging way behind the accompanying adults. And so like, I look little Minnie Mouse straight in the eye, whisper “mermaids really can’t walk that well you know” and wink at the kid. This kid’s eyes get like SUPER HUGE and then suddenly the kid goes tearing around the corner presumably to find those accompanying adults and I’m still cracking up nearly an hour later. It totally made my day omg.

i wish people would stop seeing animated movies at the result of big name studios and see them rather as the result of the hard work of hundreds of artists who dedicated their time and effort into creating something for us to enjoy