Keeping My Wedding Vows- Gerard Way Fluff/Smut
I may have taken the self consciousness a little bit too far, so slight warning for a slightly depressing theme. It’s sad, but it’s also mostly positive, I think.
I was going to be Cyber Satan and make you guys cry…. but I didn’t. I would have ended it that way There would have been a bigger warning on this, and I don’t want that.
I also did not describe body parts as I usually do, as this wasn’t supposed to focus on just the sex.
Anyway Anon, I hope you enjoy it. I loved writing this one, I got all giddy waiting to get to my computer to finish it!
((ALSO REQUESTS WILL OPEN UP IN ABOUT NINE HOURS.))
At first, you knew something was up.
First it was the fact that Gerard was playing with his food, eating only a little at a time. You weren’t all that worried. You felt as if Gerard was just trying to be a little bit more healthy, you always prepared more than enough for your daily meals.
The next flag was when he refused to engage in your sexual games, or even your affectionate ones for that matter. He never turned you down.
Then, you noticed he wasn’t taking his pills, rather, storing them in a box in the second drawer of his dresser. Did he think you wouldn’t notice? For God’s sake you go in that dresser every week!
You sat down, on your bed, counting how many tablets he didn’t take. You felt a sharp pain fly through your stomach. You felt like such a terrible wife… you weren’t able to catch his downward spiral.
You look up to see him in the doorway. His face was pale, and his eyes were wide. “I-” He started. You didn’t let him continue. “Tell me. Now. No excuses,” you say firmly, looking him dead in the eye. “Gee, I care about you, please,” You beg, setting the box of pills gently on the bed and get up.
You make your way over to him, your bare feet squishing themselves into the plush carpet. “Y/N. I don’t want to talk about it,” he answers.
“You are.” Your reply was aggressive as you grabbed his shirt, and pulled him toward the bed. You walked backwards, guiding him, and finally sat down, jerking him down with you.
“Y/N… I can’t stand it anymore.” His eyebrows lift, and his eyes soften.
You look into his eyes, begging him for some more information. “Alright, Gerard. What started this,” you whisper, talking to him kindly.
He looks down, licking his lips, hesitant to reply.
“I feel so worried about you when you don’t talk to me about your problems. I feel so, so…useless when I can’t help you. Gerard, can you please, try to tell me what sparked it this time.” You try to be assertive, your emotions cast over your voice, making it shaky and unstable.
Gerard grunts, shifting on the bed to find a more comfortable position. The box spring squeaks lightly. You grab one of his hands with yours, running your thumb over his knuckles. He sucks in a deep breath, and opens his mouth to speak. You look up at him.
“It started about a month ago,” he started, explaining solemnly.
Apparently, it was due to your constant need for him.
He felt as if, a woman like you wouldn’t be attracted to a man like him, because of the weight he put on. One day, he looked in the mirror and gave up.
He was simply, in his eyes, just not attractive to himself. If he wasn’t in his eyes, how could he be in yours?
He didn’t know if it was because he stopped taking his medicine, or if it was just a new state of mind he was floating in, nevertheless, he couldn’t stand to look at himself.
He started dodging your attempts to bed him, attempts to kiss him, attempts to touch him. He isolated himself from you, keeping himself, and you in a state of loneliness.
“I just wanted to flatter you, I wanted to woo you just as I used to… and now, I can’t even keep my mind off a much greater solution, and it’s so damn selfish… Y/N, I’m so damn sorry.” His eyes well up with tears and flood down his pale face, leaving him shaking as he tried to hold his sobs in.
You change the subject, putting your head on his shoulder, trying to convince him you were always going to love him the way he was, no matter how he changed.
You stroked the gold band on his ring finger. Smiling to yourself, trying to keep in tears of your own.
“Do you remember the day that you proposed to me?” You whispered hoarsely, twisting the ring around his finger.
Gerard attempted to open his mouth, squeezing his eyes, trying to push the rest of his tears out, but they just kept coming. His head bowed, and you sat up, pushing his head to your chest, stroking his hair with your other hand.
“You didn’t do anything big. It was in that coffee shop, just down the street from our house,” you smile, kissing his head as he weeped into your breasts. “It was quiet, and everyone clapped, the whole ten people who were in there with us.” You smiled, combing tangles out of his black hair.
Gerard clutched at your waist, and his head fell into your lap, dampening your sweat pants with the liquid falling from his eyes. His sobs almost drowned out your voice.
You sniffled, tears gliding down your soft cheeks. “I said yes and started crying right there. I wondered when you were going to lay the big question down,” You let out one big sob of your own, and continue. “I knew my answer was going to be yes, no matter how you asked, or where you asked.” Gerard’s hand grasped at the fabric of your pants. He felt guilty.
“I was almost going to ask you myself,” you laugh through your tears. “I remember, when we got home, you made us take a picture, and you made me call your mom and tell her.”
You pull him up to look at you. You hold his face in your hands, looking at his hazel eyes, red a puffy from crying. His body was shaking.
“Gerard, you are the most handsome and attractive man I have ever laid my eyes on. From the first time I saw you, and even now, you still hold my eye, you are just as attractive now as you were then.” You swallow, getting emotional yourself. You could see Gerard’s eyes get brighter, as you reassured him.
You wipe the tears falling from his eyes away with your thumbs, and look at him for a long time before you finally have yourself under control. “I love you, Gerard Arthur Way,” you say with a shaking whisper. “I always will.” You sniffle, and his tears keep going.
You hug him, and let him cry into your shoulder, clenching onto your shirt as he did so, soaking you to the skin.
Your smaller body shook with him, he sobbed loudly, choking on gasps of air as he tried to calm down. Petting his back, you whisper that you love him, over and over and over again, not missing a beat in the repetitive speech.
You finally laugh, trying to lighten the heavy mood clouding the room. “You’re handsome, and sexy, and I would think so even if you decided to shave your eyebrows off.”
“I considered it.” Gerard forces a laugh into your shoulder, and sits up, wiping his tears off with his sweatshirt sleeves.
He sniffles. “I love you too,” he replies, his hoarse voice squeaking.
You kiss his forehead, right in between his brows, and then on his nose. You plant your lips on his softly, tilting your head as he kissed back.
“You’re so handsome, Gee.” You mumble against his lips, only pulling back to look him in the eyes and say it again. You bite your lip, “You’re so handsome.”
You kiss his chin, just a soft peck on it, feeling some stubble.
You trail one peck, after another, dragging out the length of each, feeling his burning skin on your mouth.
You reach for his sweatshirt, and slowly pull it over his head, and then try again with his shirt. He hesitates.
“Gerard, there is nothing that is going to make me run away from you, darling. It’s okay,” you whisper.
He nods, taking it off for you.
“I’m always pleasantly surprised when I see you.” Your hand roams down his creamy chest, caressing each curve he had, gently, as if he might break like the china in the next room.
You push him back, gently, letting him scoot up and lay his head down on the pillows. You kiss his lips, some more, gently pulling his bottom lip in your mouth and sucking on it, as you rubbed your thumb sweetly in the middle of his chest.
You hold his hand, entwining your fingers in his as you kissed him gently, your lips hardly touching his.
To you, he was the most God damn handsome man on the planet, and you were going to make him realize that.
You finally let his hand go after gripping it for so long. You let your hand trail down his stomach, stopping at the waist band in his jeans. You look him right in the eye, smiling softly as you unbutton his pants. He helps them down, taking his boxers down too.
You were gentle, kissing down to his collar bones, your lips almost massaging the skin that covered them. They were wet kisses, gentle down his chest, careful not to leave any hickeys. You continued kissing, over the extra skin Gerard was so afraid of, and the extra body fat he found so repulsive.
You you mesmerized by his body, and you always were. You two always molded together, and you still do.
You continue to kiss downward, right below your belly button. You lifted his leg up, kissing down his beautiful pale thighs, and back up again, right up next to his length,
You kiss in one spot right in the middle of his pelvis as he waited patiently. You wrap your hand around him, pumping gently at the length in your hand. You kiss closer, and run your tongue up , making him shudder
Gerard’s breath made you shudder slightly, and his hand reached down to grab your free one. Through the sucking and the slurping Gerard had groaned loudly a couple of times, clenching hard at your hand. You look up at him, your hand still moving on his length. “Gee, I love you so much,” You whisper, and kiss his lower stomach and back down again.
You lick up to his tip, revolving around it in away that made him shiver.
He twitched. Gerard was so close to an orgasm, you could see it on his perfect face, as his dark eyebrows furrowed together, hiding some of his clear hazel eyes.
He opened his mouth, lips slightly pink and swollen, and he gasped as he reached his climax, his hips rolling into your hand as he spills.
You crawl your way up, grabbing his left hand, kissing the palm and running it over your face. They were calloused, but soft in some spots. They were big and strong, his nails wide and short.
You kissed up his ring finger, minding the golden band. Right now, his palms you were sweaty, due to the contact you just engaged in.
You massage his wrist, working your way up, his bicep, and to his shoulder. You kiss the very tip of his middle finger, and trailing your lips down his hand, kissing his knuckles.
You open your eyes from their closed position and look at him. You could see the drifting joy in his eyes.
You loved his eyes. Today they were a solid color, the textures in his eyes decided to be lighter this morning, bringing out more green in his eyes. They were a beautiful hazel, bright too, always contrasted from his dark lashes. They always seemed to have a creative glimmer in them, that would grow twice the size when he talked about art, or music, and even science fiction.
Some days, they were more brown than anything, when they were, he was usually in a focused mood, working on something, or even playing his stupid video games, which you didn’t mind much, it was always amusing, and even cute to see your husband engage in such childish games.
It seemed like you were staring at him a long time before you opened your mouth to talk. You hold his hand up in front of your face, pinching the base of his ring finger where his ring stayed. You peer around his hand, looking him in the eye again.
“Gerard, I married you because I loved you. Your body, no matter how it changes will always be attractive, will always be sexy, with always be arousing to me. Physical things like this flesh don’t mean much when you marry the soul. I married you, not your body,” you smile brightly, resting your face gently on his risen hand. “I said I was going to cherish you, I said I was going to protect you the day of our marriage,” you say thoughtfully. “I said I would love you in sickness and in health, and hell that’s what I’m doing Gerard. Keeping my wedding vows.”
Gerard smiles, a genuine, teeth baring smile.
You loved his smile, even with his age you could still see the youthful apples of his cheeks when he smiles. His teeth were small and white. He had character lines from smiling, and talking. He was usually a very happy and giggly person, which is another thing you loved about him.
You smile back, wider than before and sit up, taking your sweat pants off. Gerard’s eyes wandered nervously downward, looking at your frame in your panties.
You straddle his waist, leaning over and kissing him softly on this lips. They were slimy, but oddly pleasant to you. You were barely locking lips, the kiss only ghosting pink flesh over another’s.
Gerard’s hand finds it’s way to the back of your head, the other to your back, pressing you closer as he gained confidence. You stop supporting yourself with your hands, and bring them up to Gerard’s face, stroking his cheeks as you kissed.
You sat up, pulling your top off your torso.
Today, you didn’t bother to wear a bra, there just wasn’t a reason. You weren’t going out. It was just a lazy Saturday at home.
Gerard’s gaze fell to your breasts, respecting the curve of them, every line, every mark as he cupped them in his hands, running his thumb over one of your nipple, making your body ripple in pleasure.
In an awkward movement, making you both giggle, Gerard sat up, pressing his back against the bed frame.
His laugh always made you laugh. It was contagious to say the least. you couldn’t help but admire him. Despite his flaws, which you weren’t oblivious to, he was pretty damn perfect. He made you so giddy and warm. He was such a dork…he still is such a dork.
You cling to his body, kissing him passionately, the kiss getting a little bit more intense, but not by much. Gerard was still self conscious, and you could tell by how he moved. He wanted to keep his stomach hidden from you, so he leaned as far back as he could. He lifted you slightly off his thighs.
Gerard did however, decide to kiss down your neck, gently making you giggle. It tickled a little as his lips glided smoothly and effortlessly down your skin. He sucked at the skin on your collarbone, only lightly, careful not to leave marks.
Another awkward shift and your panties came off. You could feel his erection poking at your thigh.
You reach around and grab him, guiding him into your core. You gasp at the contact, sweat already forming on your hair line.
Gerard bites his lip, seeing you moan out. He tries to keep his in.
You move slowly, and giggling at Gerard’s attempts to be quiet.
“Gee, just let go. You’re gorgeous, babe,” you laugh, moving your hips, rolling them lightly over his.
He puts his head in your shoulder, groaning quietly to himself as you pleasure him. He grips your arms, and you lift his head up, locking lips with him, and kissing him passionately, wrapping your arms around his neck, pressing his head closer to yours.
You moan into the kiss, finding a good angle. It hit just the right spot. You were trying to please him.
You bounce, making Gerard’s mouth fall open.
“Y/N,” he whimpers.
He then wraps his arms around your waist and flips you two over. He holds his hands just above your shoulders and takes one big and deep thrust. This reduced him into a weak and sweaty mess.
You hold his face in your hands, stroking his face as he moved slow. You didn’t speak, but you focused on the sensual feeling of this encounter and his eyes, his glorious, loving eyes.
He had nothing but respect for you, and you had nothing but the same for you.
Gerard’s pace picked up only slightly, moaning out.
You couldn’t help but admire his face as he groaned. He was so handsome, the way his mouth hung open, his glossy lips so exposed.
You kissed him, holding yourself up and tugging on his hair.
Within the next few thrusts, Gerard had you reaching your climax, Your eyes widened as you fell back, arching your back and letting this powerful orgasm rip through your body. The heat made your blood boil.
You were a sweating mess, your walls clamping down and releasing over and over. You moan quietly, your mouth hanging open as Gerard continues to move deep inside of you.
“Gerard!” You gasp.
Finally, he spills inside of you, knowing about your birth control.
You sigh in relief.
Gerard pulls himself out and collapses next to you. He breaths heavily, catching his breath.
You turn toward each other, your body getting smashed up against your husband’s chest. You look up into his eyes. He holds your stare. “I love you for who you are,” you pant. “Gerard, no matter what anyone says to you, you are handsome, sexy, gorgeous, spectacular, fabulous. Whatever the hell you want to be,” you chuckle slightly. “You don’t need to look like the stick thin stereotypical rockers. Since when were you a stereotypical rocker?” You raise your eyebrow at him, questioning. “You are you. You are unique. Don’t listen to the negative things, listen to what you know deep down inside is right,” you continue on.
Gerard’s face goes softer, looking at you dead, his cheeks blushing. He smiles slightly, the corners turning up a little.
“Gerard. I love you, no matter your body shape, the color of your hair, or even if you have a lack of eyebrows someday.”
“Y/N,” his voice was still sore. “I love you so much, and I can’t thank you enough for catching me.”
You nod, smiling at the attractive man in front of you. “Now, promise to take your meds today?” You ask him, tracing circles in his chest.
“Yes. I’m also very hungry,” He replies, answering your next question in the process.
You jump out of bed, putting clothes back on and head off to the kitchen. You forgot about the pancake batter you left in the fridge.
“I’m on it Gerard!” You yell making your way into the kitchen, pulling your shirt on.
Gerard follows, putting his pants on and swaying his way into the kitchen with you. “Here, let me help. It’ll go faster,” he laughs cheerfully. “I’m hungry,” Gerard admits.
The rest of the morning was filled to the brim with happy and cheery Gerard, the one who tweets good morning every day when he wakes up, the one who smears pancake batter on your nose when you’re not looking. The Gerard that loves himself.