first lp

a list of bad tim hcs

  • every time Bruce starts lecturing someone, Tim’ll stand slightly behind him and talk over him really loudly in a deeper voice until Bruce is looking like Murder
  • Tim, flashing two 5 dollar bills and a PIzza Hut coupon: “maybe this will convince you”
  • at galas, when Bruce has a pretty lady on his arm, Tim will lean over and whisper “she doesn’t have the range” “What??” “she doesn’t have the range, Bruce.”
  • one time he ate an entire 1lb bag of sour gummi worms in one sitting. he had never wished for death more than during those following hours of complete misery. his stomach was collapsing inwards and his tongue was numb
  • fell asleep at a WE meeting with his eyes open and freaked out half the people in the room. one guy thought he might have died and security was called. Bruce brings it up every time he’s pissed at tim.

Sgt. Pepper’s Lonely Hearts Club Band is the eighth studio album by English rock band the Beatles. Released on 1 June 1967, it was an immediate commercial and critical success, spending 27 weeks at the top of the albums chart in the United Kingdom and 15 weeks at number one in the United States. Time magazine declared it “a historic departure in the progress of music” and the New Statesman praised its elevation of pop to the level of fine art. It won four Grammy Awards in 1968, including Album of the Year, the first rock LP to receive this honour.

OH dear! SO.

Please keep in mind that this was yeeeears ago, actually quite awhile before I started working on the show. I was just a fan of MLP at the time.

And it actually starts with Kingdom Hearts. At the time, @kiaxet and I were doing a Let’s Play for KH2, and were recording it in my room at my parents’ place. This was our first LP, and was a fairly low-key, just for the fun of it kinda deal, especially since neither of us had really fancy recording equipment. So this one Saturday we got together and were gonna record for several hours, easy to do since I was the only one home that day. However, my really good friend who I’m going to call Kel here (she’s not on social media) also had the day off and wanted to drive up to spend time with us. She said she should arrive between 4 and 5.

And I’m all “Yeah sure you can come hang! We’re going to be recording the LP that day. So just come in the house, head on upstairs and join us whenever you get here.” Again, low-key LP where we had other friends walk in to join on occasion.

Now, keep in mind that I figured this would be fine to tell Kel, for a number of reasons. We both had our cell phones with us, and we pretty much always left our front door unlocked if at least one person was home. On top of that, the back patio door was also always left open for the dog. And all that aside, the dog we had at the time, Sophie, was a big ol’ pitbull/swiss mountain dog mix. She was 1) pretty territorial, and 2) had a BOOMING voice. Which meant if anyone approached the front door, she let the whole house know with a giant bellow of a howl. I figured with all that, Kel would have no issue getting in and we’d know when she did, too.

(Here, have a doofy picture of her) 

WELL. Four things apparently happened.

  1. Our cell phones were turned off so that they wouldn’t interfere with the microphone.
  2. The front door was, for reasons unknown, locked.
  3. So was the back patio door.
  4. Sophie apparently decided that day she was going to take a very long afternoon nap and not care about the front door at all.

So I’m sitting up on the top floor with Kiaxet merrily let’s-playing away, wondering when Kel was going to show up, when we finally took a break at 5 and I went downstairs to get snacks. And then I heard knocking.

Kel had actually arrived at 4, discovered all entrances into the house were locked, that we weren’t answering cell phones and she’d been knocking and ringing doorbells for an hour while waiting outside. I’d basically left my good friend locked outside of the house for an hour because I didn’t think to stop playing Kingdom Hearts for a bit.

And I’m just like HOLY FRIGGIN CRAP I AM THE WORST FRIEND IN EXISTENCE, I AM SO SORRY and spent all day apologizing because I am a scumbucket of a friend who locked someone outside and did not hear them knocking at all. So I was all “DUDE. I SUCK AND I’M SORRY. To make it up to you, please let me make you some original art. Absolutely anything at all you want to request, I’ll paint it and it’s yours for free.”

Kel was a total class act and accepted the offerpology. Since she was big into Star Trek and MLP was fairly new at the time, fresh and exciting and we both enjoyed it, she asked for a painting of Discord on a throne saying one of Q’s famous lines from a favorite ST:TNG episode. So, I broke out the watercolors and spent awhile painting this for her. Once done, I was ready to pass on the painting for her.

However, Kiaxet was planning to attend an upcoming Gallifrey, and knew that John de Lancie was going to be there doing autographs, so she offered to make my apology painting extra-special and get it signed by him. Kel agreed, so Kia brought that along for an autograph.

And apparently, John de Lancie really liked it?? Like, kept gushing about how much he loved the painting to Kia. Eventually asked for my phone number so he could request another, since the original still belonged to Kel. So one day a couple weeks later I’m doin’ my thing and I get a call from someone I don’t recognize, aaand yeah, it’s John de Lancie.

“Hey, I really liked that painting you made that I signed at Gallifrey! I’m doing signings at another con real soon and I wanted to have something I could pass out for autographs if people didn’t have something. Can I commission you to do another painting like that?”

And I’m all. “UHHHH. SURE THING DUDE”

SO. I DID. Another watercolor of Discord saying one of Q’s lines. Trying to make sure I spent as much time on that as I did the first, even if there was some slight variation! Since I was giving him the original to make copies of and he was going to pay me in cash, we agreed to meet up in person for the exchange.

Sooo we meet up at a nearby Johnny Rocket and we get some fries and milkshakes, do the commission payment, and get to chatting. And he’s all “So…I keep getting all these emails from guys who apparently really like ponies and the voice I did for that show? Can you please explain this “My Little Pony” fan thing to me?”

And I’m just sitting here with my oreo milkshake like

Ho boy here we go


So that’s how I ended up explaining the concept of Bronies to John de Lancie because I accidentally locked my friend out of the house.