finding a stranger in my backseat

anonymous asked:

Please do a McKirk 'I got in my car and you were sleeping in the backseat who the hell are you and how did you get into my car?' AU

I didn’t mean for this to turn out into like an action movie plot, but here we go:

  • It’s been a long day and all Leonard wants to do is drive home from his shift in the hospital and drink beers while taking a hot bath. That’s a thing, and it’s wonderful. Who says only wine is appropriate for hot baths? But his anticipation is short lived when, right before his apartment, Leonard becomes aware of groaning in his backseat. “What the– what?!” Leonard says, looking over his shoulder at the stranger in his car. There’s literally a guy in his backseat. “What the fuck!” Leonard curses, slamming the breaks so the guy almost slides off his backseat. Good. “Watch out, Jesus,” the guy says. Leonard parks his car and gets out, yanking the backdoor open and dragging this stranger out of his car. “Ow, ow- ouch! Hey, careful!” “Who are you and what are you doing in my car?” Leonard demands, hands on the man’s leather jacket. “Jim, I’m Jim. Just… let me sleep for a while, please?“ 
  • Jim is hurt. He passes out after that, and so Leonard -against better judgment- carries Jim up up to his apartment and he puts Jim down on his couch. Jim should really go to the hospital, because he’s pale and judging by the bullet hole in his side - he should definitely not be on Leonard’s couch. Leonard rips open Jim’s shirt and grabs his instrument kit, quietly getting to work. He grumbles softly under his breath about how his bath time has been ruined by this stranger in his car. 
  • When Jim wakes up again, Leonard is sitting on the free chair, quietly sipping his coffee. “Where am I?” “No longer on the backseat of my car, that’s where,” Leonard replies. Jim’s hand moves to his wound, finding it taped off by bandages, and he looks down. “How did you…?” “I’m a doctor,” Leonard explains. “Tell me something, though. I work in a hospital. My car was literally in the parking lot of said hospital. If you were shot, why didn’t you just stumble a few more feet and went inside?” “I was shot in the hospital, I was trying to get out,” Jim explains. “What? No, that doesn’t sound right,” Leonard says. "If you got shot in the hospital, people would’ve heard.“ Jim shakes his head, slowly trying to sit up straight. “It’s a long story,” Jim explains, like he doesn’t really want to explain it any further. 
  • Jim’s gone a few hours later, despite Leonard advising him not to move. Leonard doesn’t think he’ll ever see Jim again, and he’s fine with that. He just wants his warm baths after long shifts. Maybe read a book, or watch Netflix on his tablet. He doesn’t need anything else. But a few days later, when he slides into his car again, Jim’s back on his backseat. “What the f– damn it, Jim!” "Hey, doc,“ Jim says. He’s sitting up straight this time, legs stretched out over the backseat, laptop on his lap. “What are you doing here?” Leonard asks. “I’m hacking into the hospital’s security system.” “What?” “It’s a long story, and it’s classified. I’m starving, I’ll treat you to tacos, let’s go.” “I’m not going to go get tacos with you.” Leonard says.
  • Jim still doesn’t look completely healthy, though. He sits down gingerly in the booth of Ricos Taco Place while he’s holding at least three different tacos, french fries, a salad, and a large coke. Leonard just has a small wrap, and he’s honestly amazed at how much Jim’s eating. “Care to tell me what you’re doing with my hospital?” Leonard asks, and Jim sighs. “I’ve been tracking the hospital’s financing,” Jim explains, “each year several millions disappear to various accounts in the Caribbean and Switzerland. I’m just trying to find out what exactly’s going on.” “So someone’s committing fraud and it got you shot?” “Yeah,” Jim explains, “it was a merc, though. I don’t know who’s behind all of this.”
  • Leonard finds Jim in his car at least three more times. It startles him every time, because it’s not like Jim actually announces it. He’s just there, on Leonard’s backseat, making very little noise until Leonard’s almost home. And Leonard yells at Jim for a little while, and Jim lets him, then Jim treats him to tacos or other fast food.
  • And then Leonard overhears his department head literally talk about shifting money. He just happens to walk in his office at the wrong time, and he tries to play it off like he’s heard nothing. He smiles, subtly, asking his question, and then he turns around to leave. Quick paced. He’s definitely followed. Using the fire escape, Leonard rushes to his car and slides behind the steering wheel. He reaches out for his phone to call Jim, but then Jim is already sitting in his backseat. “What’s up, doc–” “Jesus, stop doing that!” Leonard says, “it’s my boss. It’s the head of surgery department, Jim.” “What?” “The swindler guy.” "Are you sure?“ Jim asks, and he sits up straight. A few seconds later, a bullet breaks the glass of Leonard’s car, and Jim ducks down. “Jesus. Okay, yes, I guess you’re right. Drive.” He orders, climbing to the passenger seat as Leonard speeds away. 
  • Come nightfall, Leonard is fairly sure he’ll never sleep again. He’s been shot at, his car is totaled, and his hospital is under federal investigation. Jim looks fine, though. All detective-like with a badge in his hand, talking to his colleagues. Leonard watches for a while after he’s been questioned himself, but then when he’s free to go, he stops a taxi and slides in the back seat. “Hey, doc-” Jim says, apparently right next to Leonard in the back seat. “Wha-for fuck sake, Jim!” Leonard groans, slouching down in his seat and pinching the bridge of his nose. “How are you always in the same car as me?” Leonard asks, and Jim laughs. “I was just wondering if you wanted to get drinks.” “I’m going home.” “We can drink in your home, too,” Jim shrugs, and Leonard turns to look at Jim with a frown. “Are you saying you’re gonna join me in bath, too?” He asks, sarcastically, but Jim looks at him with such interest that Leonard immediately regrets that question. “Yes! Absolutely I will join you.” Jim says, and Leonard laughs. “You’re not joining me.”
  • Leonard can feel Jim smile smugly behind his back, but he’s really not caring right now. Jim’s chest is warm in the hot water. His hand is leaning just outside the tub, lazily holding his bottle of beer. “This was a very nice idea,” Jim says, and Leonard shivers when he feels Jim’s hot, wet fingers run through his hair. “I don’t remember saying you could join,” Leonard says. “You’re not complaining now though,” Jim says, and Leonard huffs. “I just need to relax a little,” Leonard says, his hand dipping under the water and resting on Jim’s leg. “I know other things that’ll help you relax a little,” Jim says, lips brushing over the side of Leonard’s head. And when his hand dips down over Leonard’s chest and into the water, sliding between Leonard’s leg, Leonard is definitely not complaining.
June 3, 2017...

This cat hasn’t left us alone since everything happened. It jumped into the backseat of the truck right before we left and hitched a ride all the way back to the bunker, but she was in the house and isn’t a stranger to people. We thought she was a stray, but it looks like she knew a little bit about Kelly and Cas judging by how she’d find her way around the bunker. You should know I had nothing to do with this. The cat just up and walked in like it owned the place and didn’t give two shakes of a rat’s ass about how Sam or my nose felt about it. She’s typically on the other side of the bunker, though. We shut Cas’s room just to make sure she didn’t go in, but I’ve found her sitting outside the door more than once.        

The funny or not so funny part about all this is that this isn’t the first time a little lion’s been in this place. Cas found an old stray back a while back and welcomed him in to get him away from the rain or just the elements for a while. That one could barely keep its eyes open it was so young. This one, on the other hand, is at least a few months and just stares. It’s borderline creepy how it does that. Funny enough, it ahd been because of that that we figured out the cat probably hung around Cas for a while…

We’ve closed just about every storage unit and the shooting range and weapons barracks to make sure she doesn’t accidentally step in and stir up something we don’t want, but I don’t know what we’re gonna do with her. For now, though, Claire found a friend. She and the cat have been inseparable since Claire found her in the kitchen yesterday. I don’t know if they’re bonding over brothers in arms or if Claire having a cat will set Jody on edge, but they look a lot happier than I’ve seen them in a while. And the cat keeps doing things just like Cas, even if her eyes are brown instead of blue. They still look like they’re staring at the darkest parts of you without judging.

Damn allergy meds keep making my face red. Yeah, that’s it.


Yesterday | Tomorrow

  • Griffin: It's by Yahoo Answers user Jessica, who asks, "Help with my own urban legend? In my English class we're having this huge project on urban legends. My job is to create my own urban legend but I'm having trouble making a good plot. I need suggestions. I can write Romance, Horror, Suspense, Supernatural, Par, etc."
  • Travis: Wait what?
  • Griffin: I don't... Maybe golf? Golf-themed urban legends, I don't - I don't understand.
  • Travis: Great.
  • Griffin: "So I would prefer one of these topics in it. I know there are non-scary urban legends out there but I like creepy, 'it can possibly happen to you' stories."
  • Justin: Does this urban legend have to be about her?
  • ...
  • Justin: 'Hiding in the backseat there's Jessica!' That's not really scary.
  • Griffin: Maybe we can find some inspiration in some answers, what do you think? Let's just dip in there and see what happens. Answerer 1 says, "A bad storm comes and everyone is safe but one young teenage boy. At the same time every morning, weird things happen where his death took place. It begins to attract more and more kids from his school, especially those who were close to him. Things begin to get stranger and stranger." Now that's my favorite part in every horror story, is when things begin to get stranger and stranger. "Those who were close to him decide to use a ouija board to communicate with him at that same time and the same day a year later. Unfortunately, they learn that it wasn't him the hard way. Best thing I could spring up at this time, maybe you could work with it and other people's ideas."
  • Justin: Wait, wait, wait. The kid lived, I thought?
  • Griffin: Did he? Because a bad storm came and everyone lived except for one young teenage boy.
  • Travis: That is the worst urban legend I have ever heard.
  • Griffin: Hey! It's the best thing they could spring up at this time.
Sunday Smut Spotlight: AU!Tom Hiddleston

Greetings, readers and authors.  (and readers who might become authors, and authors who want to read).  I’ve bumped up my tag list so large now that Tumblr chokes when I try to include it.  So I’ll be sending tags out to people for this edition in several short posts to follow.

We have a panty-melting, beautiful assortment of Toms this week for you to have fun with, and I hope you do. [WildWest!Tom showed up, too!] Please show your appreciation for our authors with like and comments, and do re-blog this post to spread the love.

First paragraphs of each story included with the links.

images by smittentomkitten [xoxo]

[Index of all SSS editions]

WARNINGS: This is smut. Erotic fiction. Sex is involved. Taboo fantasies are involved.  18+, Mature Audiences, kiddies be gone, you have been warned.


Collateral by unseendancingqueen *added 2014-08-05*

Summary: Female Reader is carjacked by Tom and whisked away to a remote area until he gets what he wants, in so many words.

The rain beat down heavily on the pavement as you pulled up across the street from the coffee house you were meeting clients at on behalf of your boss. With 10 minutes to kill before the meeting, you decided to organize your briefcase and make sure all of the contracts were in order. You pulled the manila envelope from the backseat that contained the forms and as you turned to face forward in your chair, when you heard your car door open. You looked up to find yourself face to face with a stranger, who stared back at you silently with a slight smirk playing on his lips.


Say My Name by i-wish-i-was-the-moon

Summary: Being focused on her research and career has made Dr Watson a lonely and grumpy woman. What happens when her new colleague Professor Hiddleston, a cheery and handsome man, decides to befriend her?

If it weren’t so gross, it might have been cute. Four weeks into a new term, and the new professor of anthropology was being spoiled rotten. As a junior professor he had been given the most boring lectures, the ones where you had students sleeping through them. And yet, you were barely able to fit into his class room. Every time I peeked in, the room was filled with female students ogling at him and wearing way too little clothing considering the efficient air-conditioning. The Dean was in awe, and in the last staff meeting she had spent a good twenty minutes singing his praise. I had pretended to receive an urgent call to get out of the meeting before blurting out my opinion about cougars.


Absolution by so-easy-to-love-me

Summary: The encounter with a young priest turns both your lives around.

I´m not a religious person, but I have always liked churches. It calms me just to sit there, inhale history and that I´m feeling so little in the face of it. I like the massive, cool stonewalls that surround me like a safe haven. I like the silence, the subtle scent of myrrh and olibanum. The hypnotic chants that go along with the fulminating play of the organ. The heavy gold framed paintings and stone statues, both equally beautiful and often cruel in their display. I find it to be very awe-inspiring and very beautiful.


Mountain by coy00koi (multi-chapter in progress)

Summary: Audrey Munson escapes to a mountain, to hide from a murder she committed in self-defense. After almost dying of poisoning, she is saved by a dark, brooding loner who helps her, but chases her away, wanting to remain alone. However, she is unable to survive in the wilderness by herself, so she ends up being saved by him again.

The field seemed endless, heavy summer sun scorching the blades of grass and making it seem like a sea of gold, enchanting and torturing my senses.


R&R (Rest and Relaxation) by matchgirl42
Note: this story can now be found on Kindle [here]

Summary: Tom Hiddleston, one of the armed outlaws of the wild wild west known to the public only as the Golden Bandit, visits a saloon/brothel for some rest and relaxation.

The hooves of Tom’s horse sounded dull on the packed dirt. He kept his head down, the brim of his hat shading his eyes from the harsh sun as he rode into the town. God above but he was tired. Happy and rich after that last run, but tired. And ready for a drink and some rest. And some relaxation.


Dolores and Our Father by angelica-aswald

Summary: Alexandra McMasters just turned eighteen and is a few months of graduating from her all girls’ catholic boarding school. But when she gets detention for misbehaving in Father Hiddleston’s class things get out of hand when her flirting pays off.

There was being reckless, hell their whole relationship was reckless but this was insanity. The only thing that made it even crazier was the fact that Tom was actually contemplating the idea of it.


Tempus Fugit chapter 1 by laterovaries (multi chapter, complete. look at her fics page to find all chapters)

Summary: A time-traveling Tom, fallen out of love with his needy and spoiled wife, meets an exciting woman in the past.

“I just don’t understand why you have to go so often,” Marisol griped, her voice grating on his every nerve. He knew better than to try and argue with her. Arguing would only stretch things out into an eternity, then it would be too late in the evening for him to go.


Rosewood by ohhiddles-myhiddles

Summary: Father Tom, celibate for 12 years, succumbs to the attentions of a lusty parishioner.

It is a quiet Friday, much like any other. Parishioners coming and going. Some confessing their sins in his presence, others more comfortable with him just hearing their voices. Father Tom sits in his little wooden chair, shrouded in darkness save for the solitary light that illuminates his hunched figure. He passes the time by reciting silent prayers as he advances on his rosary. The rosewood beads give off a pungent aroma, reminding him of when he received it as a gift from the Pope - the memory brings a smile to his face even now.


Work-Related by neither-blue-nor-green
(multi-chapter, in progress, smut starts in chapter 3)

Summary: Sue doesn’t think too much of Tom, her associate at their law firm, until they begin to work together to help their threatened boss.

Sue downed a shot and slammed it on the bar.

“I just can’t believe he would be careless like that!” She hissed and gestured the bartender to fill her glass again.

Beth shrugged and sipped her Daiquiri. “He always was an asshole.” she said.


Untitled by theindomitablemegnolia **

[ed. notes] - I broke my rules. This isn’t smut. I’m putting this one in here because it’s unusual, and the AU!Tom presented here is unique.

Suddenly stuck in muck and mire, she tried to force the lump in her throat she couldn’t get to slide down her throat, the last thing she ever wanted was that last stupid sentimental tear to streak down her cheek. She batted her lashes and rolled her eyes fighting that dewy precipitation keeping it lubricating her eyes as it was intended and not paying homage to something, she did not even want to acknowledge. It wasn’t even like she was jealous or even cared, but it just rubbed her emotion raw where it chafed that the ignorant and the dull they too have their story to tell, but do they always have to seem so happily blissful in their utter ignorance.


Coffee & Liquor by lokiwholockfactory (‘arisanite’ on ao3 - 3 chapters, complete)

“Oh come on darling,” he said in a cheerful tone. “Forget about that last task, Una will take care of it –“

You were fucking swimming in stress that day, considering that your supervisor didn’t come in that morning – and you received an email with his tasks delegated to you, saying that he had to rush himself to the ER due to an unscheduled appendectomy… but you didn’t want to believe him since you were aware of Richard bragging how he got drunk and had his appendix taken out without topical anesthesia two years ago…


English Lessons by sinfully-lustful-darling

Summary: A new faculty member at the English department gets to work right away with his assigned teaching partner

There was rumor buzzing around our faculty lounge that there was going to be a new edition to our English Department. The women couldn’t stop talking about him, the men were trying to act nonchalant. I had seen him walking the halls with the Principal that morning and found myself doing a double take. He was wearing a black leather jacket, white dress shirt, black tie, trousers and dress shoes. He was tall, his hair looked like he had just stepped out of the shower a few minutes prior (like I needed that thought this early in the morning) and from what I could see, he was definitely a looker.


Shooters by sunny-is-sherlokid

Summary: You aren’t really enjoying yourself too much at this male strip club, until a tall Englishman in cowboy boots introduces you to a new way to drink some shots.

You couldn’t believe you had let your friends drag you in here. You look around as the lights, music and smells assault your senses. The man on the stage was good looking but a little too muscly for your tastes. You friends though, seemed to think he was just right; they threw tens and twenties up on the stage and as he came over to collect them he slid his g-string down to give them a peek of what was under.


Mating Habits by haveahiddles (redvelvetrose on ao3)

Summary: Paleontologist Tom is extremely well-versed in describing the mating habits and sex lives of the specimens in his department.

Free museum days were fantastic. True, they were meant mostly for school kids on summer break and not for full grown adults with jobs; but she would take what she could get. Fridays were the free day at the Chicago Field Museum and ever since her office job had switched to summer hours, giving her Friday afternoons off, she had indulged.


An Officer and a Whore by tomslegsarekillingmeslowly

Summary: This is no 'routine traffic stop’

“Fuck! Are you fucking kidding me?” you yell as you see the red and blue lights behind you and hear the siren. This is exactly what you didn’t need right now. You were already running late for an appointment which is why you had speeding in the first place. Fuck, fuck, fuck.


Professor by britishmenaredestroyingmylife

Summary: Ginny can no longer keep hidden her true feelings toward her philosophy professor.

I walked with purpose through the darkened hallways of the philosophy building.

I’d been thinking about it, fixating on it, for far too long now. I was in love with him; I knew it and I was almost certain he knew it. I didn’t know if he loved me, but tonight I was going to find out. No more games.


Service Me by ladiesloveloki

Summary: Selenna, a server in a restaurant, has a customer that demands that only she serve him. Little did she know just how much…service…he would require.

He was here again. Like he was every single night for the past seven months.

The tall man was sitting in the darkened corner booth of the restaurant, sipping a coffee with an empty plate in front of him. His long legs were stretched out under the table in front of him. Had someone else been sitting with him, he would have taken up all their leg space.


He’s a Pirate by sierralaufeyson13

Summary: Six words: Sexy times with Pirate Tom Hiddleston.

“Come below as soon as you can darling,” Tom had told her, kissing her fingertips lightly before leaving her at the helm of the Empress, adding, in a silky tone laden with a sensual promise, “I’ll be waiting for you …”


Half Moons and a Peach Tree by furiedheart (ao3)

Summary: Injured athlete Chris Hemsworth and physical therapist Tom Hiddleston

[Ed. note] - this one is quite long and mostly romantic, but there is some lovely sex between Chris and Tom. A treat for the hiddlesworth fans.

Sometimes, the memory of the pain was powerful enough to make Chris grimace. It made him start, no matter what he was doing, terrified it was happening all over again. And lately it seemed like he’d been doing a whole lot of nothing. But once that sharp flash of fire hit his brain and buzzed through his synapses, it was like an outrage, the way he would tense up, breathing heavy, hand shooting out to steady himself before he realized, sweat spotting his brow, that it was only a memory. And then other details would return to him, details he wished would disappear into that dormant part of everyone’s brain, the part no one used, to stay there and die. But the ceiling lights in the bowels of the stadium hallways flashed in front of his eyes as if he were back on that gurney, cold concrete walls whizzing by and feeding his pain and fear, pushed along by the medical team and a few of the assistant coaches, who were striding beside his rolling gurney, shouting words at him that he couldn’t understand through the misery. Teeth gritted, all he could do was concentrate on his panted breaths, helpless.


Thank you all for tuning in to this weeks’ spotlight. 
Please let me know if you want on or off of my tag lists.

Tonight is my last night sleeping alone. Today we signed our lease and handed over two and a half grand; this week the love of my life and I move into our first house together. Our new place is on stilts and has blue walls, a bathtub and a balcony. I’ve always wanted a balcony but more than that I want my babe. I’d have lived (loved) anywhere at all, a room the size of a shoebox as long as it meant waking up with our butts touching every morning - we were lucky enough to find a little corner of perfection & a house that will be only ours. 

Andrew and I started out so rocky but I think a part of me knew I could love him someday from our very first conversation. From a first ‘date’ drinking $4 red wine amongst departed souls at night, to me coming in his mouth for the first time and tasting myself on his beard afterwards, to falling asleep on each other’s laps in the backseats of relative strangers’ cars on the other side of the world, from there and back again including every moment of the past two years of being blessed enough to be in one another’s lives, I couldn’t imagine being anywhere but here. 

Tomorrow night we’ll cook our last meal in this shitty kitchen where we can’t find anything, nothing’s clean and one of my housemates will passive-aggressively sigh when I make a corny joke, as if his bedroom didn’t have a door. After that it’s slow dancing as we wait for the kettle to boil and watching movies naked on the couch because finally, finally everything belongs to only us.