filthy paws

Dick: Stop squirming.

Jason: Stop whining.

Dick: I’m literally handcuffed to you and it hurts whenever you move.

Jason: If you forget we’re also handcuffed to the Replacement and Demon Spawn.

Tim: Yeah but you’re the one thats squirming Jason.

Jason: Well excuse me for wanting to be in a comfortable position.

Damian: Tt, you’re a sorry excuse for a Robin Todd. Even Drake is being somewhat of an asset.

Tim: Was that a compliment?

Dick: Jason for Pete’s sake would you stop squirming?! You’re going to dislocate my shoulder.

Jason: Got it! *rubs wrists*

Tim: That’s great and all but what about us?

Jason: Sorry Princess, but I ain’t touching the Demon Brat with a ten foot pole.

Damian: Wouldn’t want your filthy paws touching me anyways Todd.

Dick: Damian!!

Jason: And you were complaining about my squirming Dickie.

Dick: Jason please.

Jason: *tosses lock pick at Dick* There you go Wing. A little help.

Dick: *unlocks handcuffs*

Tim: This is why Dick’s the favorite.

Jason: Fuck you.

Viktor's conflicting feels about Beka headcanons

-He may or may not pretend he can’t pronounce “Otabek” correctly.

-Viktor once tried to get Beka drunk so he could prove he is irresponsible…Viktor got drunk instead, Beka was the designated driver.

-drunk!Viktor often cries about how beautiful Otayuri is and how happy he is for his son.

-Viktor has Beka’s contact saved as “Son In Law that Wants to Steal My Baby”

-He may or may not have secretly installed a tracking device on Yuri’s phone and that’s how Viktuuri always “conisidentially” runs into Otayuri on dates.

-He’s always “complaing” about Beka to Yuuri “Ugh look at the stupid loving way he’s gazing at our son! Flipping jerk always thinking about his safety…HE WOULDN’T NEED TO IF THEY RODE SOMETHING NORMAL INSTEAD OF THAT DEATH TRAP!!!” Yuuri rolls with it and tries not to laugh.

-Beka’s motercycle is nothing but an accident waiting to happen to Viktor and he sends Yuri a million messages whenever they ride it.

-Part of Viktor wants to marry Otayuri right where they stand the other part wants to take Yuri somewhere far away where no gangster will ever lay their filthy paws on him again! (his words)

-“Pffft at least he’s not JJ!!! But I still hate him!!! Change your hair or something Otabek it looks too much like JJ’s!!!”

-One day they have this nice father/future son in law day. Viktor bought Beka a suit and Beka paid for their eXpEnSivE mEaL.

-It was all going perfectly until they got home and Yuri glomped Beka and ignored Viktor.

-Viktor has to smile and deal with it when Yuri’s hair is in a nice braid because “WOW MY PRECIOUS SON YOU LOOK SO PRETTY” and “OTABEK BRAIDED YOUR HAIR?! PFFT I COULD MAKE IT LOOK BETTER!!!”

-Viktor may or may not have been the first one to use the ship name “Otayuri”.

-Of course when no one is around and someone talks bad about Otabek Viktor goes into full on rage mode “WTF DID YOU SAY ABOUT MY SON IN LAW?! HE IS A HERO AND WILL MAKE SURE MY SON IS HAPPY!!!!”

-Speaking of the “Hero” nickname Viktor may or may not have written a very fluffy fairytale AU about the Hero and Fairy.

-In which this Hero cowers before the Fairy’s very handsome father and does like a million trials to prove his love!!!

-Viktor really does care about Beka and trully thinks Otayuri is perfect he just takes the Overprotective Dad™ role waaaaaay tooooo faaaaar

Lucky you, I’m drunk watching TSoT again, cuz i went thru the.list and realized hey what other episodes matter, right? Here we go: The game is, drink whenever you wanna forget s4 and that Mary was never given the chance to be a true villain and mastermind of the Moriarty network thus invalidating her relationship with John and solidifying Sherlock and John’s true love:

- There’s gotta be a faster way to steal gold.

- All Sherlock texted was “Help,” and Greg brought friggen helicoptors. He’s worse than John.

- Aaaaahhhh…I almost forgot what good cinematography looks like.

- Why does Mrs. H say “you always live alone”? Goddamn EMP, get your filthy paws off my favorite episode.

- Oh sure, one of the main characters got married in this episode, but we’re not gonna show tge ceremony at all, and his first word spoken will be “Sherlock.”

- I hate Mary but she’s so pretty and I love her dress

- David looks like he knows he’s gonna be a Surprise Parent in 9,783 fics.

- When will we see Harry. When will we see John’s bedroom. When will we see the truth. Why is my tequila pink.

- Goddamn every time Sherlock and Mary interact it’s so purposefully easy. They work. They’re like siblings. She’s so smart. TST would have never happened. Goddammit.

- Whenever I’m about to do something uncomfortably sociable I imagine Mycroft saying “Minnngling…?”

- Okay, I get the Greg and Molly thing. He stands so close…

- It bothers me that the Best Man Proposal is the only scene we see the kitchen from that angle. Seems like a different flat.

- God fuckin damn I love the editing of this whole fucking episode. I need a sandwich.

- John flirtily saying “Nnnyess?” while Sherlock is freaking out about the best man thing is downright indecent.

- John trying not to cry during the speech is cruel. Let the man feel.

- Their entire friendship is contained in John saying “wait til I sit down.” And the fact that John reacts to everything in this speech a millisecond before Sherlock says it. Cuz he knows what he’s gonna say. Cuz they’re meant for each other. I hate this episode.

- There is a man bleeding out, Sherlock, control your libido.

- He said, abOut the stag night: “There’s hoyrs if material here, but I’ve cut it down to the really good bits.” I SEE YOU, MOFTISS. WITH THE EDITING PUN. GIVE US THE GAY BAR SCENE.

- I need 12 minutes of the theme i dubstep, please.

- Sherlock gets so much campier when he’s drinking. AND SO DOES JOHN.

- The most interesring thing about the knee grab “I don’t mind,” line is that it was clearly ADDED IN POST. They organized time to sit Martin Freeman behind a microphone to more clearly Insert. That. Line. Whyyyyyy. Releaseee meeeeeee.

- Sherlock drunkenly realizing his hand was behind John’s back is EVERYTBING.

- “WITH A GHOST MR. HOLMES.” Okay so let’s not acknowledhe thT this while thing mirrors TAB or whatever. So mucb fake death in tbis show. I wish s4 was fake, cuz that was a death if ive ever seen one

- Okay, tbis is definitely a two sandwich problem


- I like how Sherlock basically says “no more murder and mystery” and then in ten seconds it turns into a murder mystery. SUCK IT, MARY.

- BBC Sherlock shows John Hamish Watson coming up the stairs with groceries more times than it shows him embracing his actual wife. HMMMMMM.

- “We would never do that to John Watson,” with his deduction face on. They.are both in love with john, and he just confirmed it.

- “Oh wbat a niiiiight.” I hate this episode.

anonymous asked:

Hey Pjotya, you look so fluffy! I wanna burry my face in your furr and cuddle you ๐Ÿ’š So what did you think when you saw Yuras EX?

Stop. Pawlease do not lay your filthy paws on me. I work very hard to maintain my appearance. I would need to groom you before consenting to your touch.

Of course, I always watch my kitten through the magic window. He was ameowzing. This purrrformance was the most like when he’s dancing in his room just for me. I was very pawroud.

Truly meowgnificent.

[ Therapy ] • 2

Therapist!Negan x Reader

A/N: So this a continuation of the Therapy piece that I did for a challenge. I think there will be one more part after this. I had a super long day, so when I re-read this I was doubting myself a lot so rather than delete & rewrite Iโ€™m just gonna post it. I have nooo idea whatโ€™s going to happen in part 3 - ideas are always welcome! - forgive me, my brain hurts right now.ย Hope you enjoy it lovelies! I appreciate all your reblogs/comments/likes!

Tags: SMUT - TW: attempted sexual assault, suicide, inappropriate doctor/patient relationshipย 

|| Masterlist || Part 1 ||ย 

Originally posted by holyjeffreydeanmorgan


Tick, tock, tick, tockโ€ฆ.

You felt as though the pendulum was knocking against each side of your skull. You rubbed your temples together trying to shake off the growing headache creeping up from the back of your neck. The stress from your awful morning passed into your evening, and you couldnโ€™t bring yourself to maintain a proper conversation since your mind had other pressing matters that were distracting you. ย 

You have been continuing your therapy with Negan. Each session would start the same, with the two of you silently studying one another for a few minutes until someone finally broke the ice.

Keep reading

✰ * º ❛ grease sentence starters. ❜

        (   part of the chick flick series   )

‘  i could flirt with all the guys. smile at them and bat my eyes.  ’
‘  what will they say monday at school?  ’
‘  can’t you see that i’m in misery?  ’
‘  made a start, now we’re apart. there’s nothing left for me.  ’
‘  please say you’ll stay.  ’
‘  don’t make me laugh.  ’
‘  a hickey from me is like a hallmark card, when you only care enough to send the very best!  ’
‘  i sit and wonder why you left me.  ’
‘  somehow, someway, our two worlds will be one.  ’
‘  my darling, you hurt me real bad. you know it’s true.  ’
‘  you gotta believe me when i say i’m helpless without you.  ’
‘  won’t go to bed till i’m legally wed.  ’
‘  i was not brought up that way.  ’
‘  she looks too pure to be pink.  ’
‘  i don’t drink or swear.  ’
‘  i get ill from one cigarette.  ’
‘  keep your filthy paws off my silky drawers!  ’
‘  keep that pelvis far from me!   ’
‘  just keep your cool, now you’re starting to drool.  ’
‘  are you making fun of me?  ’
‘  some people are so touchy!  ’
‘  you know that ain’t no shit. we’ll be getting lots of tit.  ’
‘  i’ll kill to get the money.  ’
‘  you know that i ain’t bragging.  ’
‘  you are supreme.  ’
‘   tell me about it, stud.  ’
‘  i got chills, they’re multiplying and i’m losing control.  ’
‘  you better shape up.  ’
‘  my heart is set on you.  ’
‘  you better shape up, you better understand.  ’
‘  to my heart, i must be true.  ’
‘  you’re the one that i want.  ’
‘  if you’re filled with affection, you’re too shy to convey. meditate in my direction – feel your way.  ’
‘  i better shape up ‘cause you need a man.  ’
‘  i need a man who can keep me satisfied.  ’
‘  you better prove that my faith is justified.  ’
‘  your story’s sad to tell.  ’
‘  most mixed up non-delinquent on the block.  ’
‘  your future’s so unclear now.  ’
‘  what’s left of your career now?  ’
‘  there are worse things i could do.  ’
‘  the neighborhood thinks i’m trashy and no good.  ’
‘  make them think they stand a chance then refuse to see it through.  ’
‘  i could hurt someone like me out spite or jealousy.  ’
‘  i don’t steal and i don’t lie, but i can feel and i can cry. in fact, i bet you never knew.  ’
‘  to cry in front of you – that’s the worst thing i could do.  ’
‘  boy, good news travels fast around.  ’
‘  i met a girl crazy for me.  ’
‘  i met a boy, cute as can be.  ’
‘  tell me more.  ’
‘  he sounds like a drag.  ’
‘  not the first to know there’s just no getting over you.  ’
‘  i’m hopelessly devoted to you.  ’
‘  i know i’m just a fool who’s willing to sit around and wait for you.  ’
‘  there’s nothing else for me to do. i’m hopelessly devoted to you.  ’
‘  there’s nowhere to hide since you pushed my love aside.  ’
‘  fool, forget him.  ’
‘  my heart is saying don’t let go.  ’
‘  hold on to the end, that’s what i intend to do.  ’
‘  look at me, there has to be something more than they see.  ’
‘  hold your head high.  ’
‘  i’m not very hungry… just give me a double polar burger with everything on it and a cherry soda with chocolate ice cream.  ’
‘  men are rats. listen to me, they’re fleas on rats. worse than that, they’re amoebas on fleas on rats. i mean, they’re too low for even the dogs to bite.  ’
‘  the only man a girl can depend on is her daddy.  ’
‘  peachy keen, jellybean.  ’
‘  my parents want to invite you over for tea on sunday.  ’
‘  i don’t like parents.  ’
‘  i’ve got so many hickeys people think i’m a lepar.  ’
‘  do you think these glasses make me look smarter?  ’
‘  eat your heart out.  ’
‘  sloppy seconds ain’t my style.  ’
‘  every teacher i got this year has flunked me at least once.  ’
‘  i just ain’t gonna take any of her crap, that’s all. i don’t take no crap from nobody.  ’
‘  i’m sure glad you didn’t take any of her crap. you would of really told her off, huh?  ’
‘  it doesn’t matter if you win or lose. it’s what you do with your dancin’ shoes.  ’
‘  i don’t look as it as dropping out. i look as it as a very strategic career move.  ’
‘  that’s cool, baby. you know how it is, rockin’ and rollin’ and whatnot.  ’
‘  that’s my name. don’t wear it out.  ’
‘  what’s the matter with you?  ’
‘  what’s the matter with me? baby, what’s the matter with you?  ’
‘  you’re a fake and a phony and i wish i never laid eyes on you!  ’
‘  i hear you’re knocked up.  ’
‘  i don’t run away from my mistakes.  ’
‘  don’t worry, it was someone else’s mistake.  ’
‘  thanks a lot, kid.i think there’s more to you than just fat.  ’
‘  i got twinkies. anybody want one?  ’
‘  twinkies and wine? oh, that’s real class.  ’
‘  what’s the matter? we don’t got cooties!  ’
‘  i’ll bet you never had a drink before either, have you?  ’
‘  i’ll take it to the grave.  ’
‘  coming through, coming through! lady with a baby!  ’
‘  much better than hanging around here with you dorks.  ’
‘  the rules are… there ain’t no rules!  ’
‘  if you find him, give him my phone number.  ’
‘  he was sort of special.  ’
‘  there ain’t no such thing.  ’
‘  beauty is pain.  ’
‘  when a guy picks a chick over his buddies, something’s gotta be wrong.  ’
‘  c’mon, let’s go for some pizza.  ’
‘  you’re cruisin’ for a bruisin’.  ’
‘  you got the personality of a wet mop.  ’
‘  that is the ugliest looking thing i ever saw.  ’
‘  you can’t just walk out of the drive-in.  ’
‘  don’t worry about it. nobody’s watching.  ’
‘  i thought i meant something to you!  ’
‘  you think i’m going to stay here with you in this– -   this sin wagon?  ’
‘  i feel like a defective typewriter.  ’
‘  oh, bite the weenie.  ’
‘  what are you gonna be when you grow up?  ’

Cursed For Life | 01

Draco x Reader

Word Count: 2085

Summary: Bully; Womanizer; Death Eater. Draco Malfoy is a name all students at Hogwarts fears; what they donโ€™t know is that behind the hexes and that signature smirk of his, thereโ€™s pain, suffering, and regret. Draco Malfoy is more than a Hogwarts bully, more than Lord Voldemortโ€™s puppet; heโ€™s a tortured soul, misunderstood by allโ€ฆ

A/N: This is a fan fiction I started a few years ago, and never completed. I decided to dust it off and attempt to complete it. Hopefully it doesnโ€™t suck too much, haha. (Also, the gif is not mine, so credit goes to the creator.)


โ€œSlytherin!โ€ The Sorting Hat roared from atop your head. The Great Hall went from boisterous to deafeningly silent in a matter of seconds. All were shocked that the Muggle-born, Y/F/N Y/L/N, was placed into the house mostly made up of pure-bloods. But no one was more shocked than you. There you sat, dumbfounded and afraid to leave the seat you were in to approach your House table.

Being a new student, just transferring over from Beauxbatons, you were the only sixth year being sorted into a House. You looked anxiously over at Harry Potter, Ron Weasley, and Hermione Granger, three new friends you had made on the train ride to Hogwarts, wishing that they would come to your rescue. But no, they did no such thing. How could they? The Sorting Hat had made its decision; there was no turning back now.

All three, though the same age as you, already belonged to the Gryffindor House, having been sorted there their first year at Hogwarts. The four of you had planned on the idea that you would also be sorted into Gryffindor; clearly fate had other plans in mind.

Keep reading

blog-that-reblogs  asked:

May I please have a scenario where s/o just asks Allen why they hate them. Like s/o is convinced that Allen hates their guts and wants them dead, hence why he keeps hurting them and kidnapped them. And s/o is genuinely apologizing for being so bad that he felt the need to do all of those horrible things to them? Im sorry is this is too wordy or if its confusing lol

S/o sat, laid on the floor, bound and covered in wounds, crying gently. A creak was heard from the direction of the door as light spilled into the room. S/o became silent as they heard approaching footsteps. 

“Hey doll, I’m here to clean ya up.” Allen grabbed one of the ropes binding s/o and used it to hoist them up into a sitting position. He pulled out a knife and s/o flinched.

“I'm sorry!” S/o yelled out in fear of the knife. Allen halted his actions. 

“For what?” Allen quirked an eyebrow, surprised at s/o’s outburst. 

“I… I don’t know but I’m sorry.” S/o began to shake and sob profusely. Allen paused, frozen, before crouching down. 

“H-Hey, it’s okay,” Allen placed a tentative hand on their back, gently rubbing up and down. “I don't even know what you’re apologizing for, you haven't done anything wrong.” S/o tried to recoil at Allen’s touch.

“Th-then, why did you kidnap me, why did you hurt me?” S/o looked up at him with a searching and broken look, tears and snot running down their face. Allen looked at them incredulously.

“Because I love you, of course.” Allen placed down the knife and held their shoulders, looking intently into their eyes. “I couldn't just let anyone else have ya. You shoulda seen how they looked at you, all of em’ trying to put their filthy paws on ya. It was disgusting, you belong to me.” Allen placed his forehead on theirs and flashed a smile filled with insanity. “And the punishments were just that, punishments. I can’t let you out of this room until your well behaved. Otherwise, you might cause trouble. Can’t you see, I’m doing this out love, I wanna protect you!” 

“That's not love.” S/o almost snarled, dejected and hopeless. They had fallen into the hands of a madman. Allen leaned back, a look of surprise flickered across his face before determination settled amongst his features. 

“Of course it is, I went through all this effort to get you.” Allen took the knife, not only cutting through the rope, but clothing as well. “I guess I'll just have to show ya.” 


The Queen

**gifs not mine, if yours kindly let me know so Iโ€™ll credit ๐Ÿ˜Š**


There was no escaping nor denying what the heart flutters and the butterflies in their stomachs meant. Every time their eyes met, how Sansa found her recent feelings rather peculiar and how Jonโ€™s lingering gazes seemed curious, every time she entered the hall or opened her mouth to speak. Those lipsโ€ฆ

Or how much he clenched his fists and seethed whenever Lord Baelish slithered near or breathed in their presence. The audacityโ€ฆ

Keep reading

Hurt Me, Not Him- Imagine

Fandom: The Vampire Diaries

Pairing: Damon Salvatore x Human!Reader

Warning: swearing, slight gore, slight nudity, i think that’s it??

Word Count: 1238

Summary: Klaus kidnaps you and Damon comes to save you

You groaned as you came back to consciousness. The pain in your neck throbs as you pick your head up from off your shoulder.

“Oh look, she is awake.” You open your eyes and look right into the face of Klaus. You flinch away, only to be restrained. You look up and realize you are dangling from the ceiling, your feet just barely touching the floor.

“Damon? Where’s Damon” You spat at him, “I was with him last night.” Klaus eyes gleamed even more and he couldn’t keep the smile off his lips. “Well, love, the last time I saw him he was lying on the floor of his bedroom suffering from a broken neck.” You gasped and tried pulling yourself from the roof, although you know it was useless. Even if you could escape, Klaus is a hybrid and would catch up with your human speed in no time.

You couldn’t help letting a few tears slip down your cheeks. Klaus reached out and swiped them away. You pulled yourself up and kicked him in the chest, “Get away from me! You stay away from me, you monster!” Instead of getting angry like you expected, he burst out laughing.

“You know when Damon said you were a fighter, I wasn’t expecting much, you know, from a human, but I am impressed.” He approached you, clasping a hand around your throat, bringing his face in close to yours, “Maybe we can have some fun of our own.”

“Get your filthy hybrid paws off of her.” You hear from the door. You didn’t try to stop the tears from falling. Damon stood there, a murderous look etched on his face. He took a step towards Klaus and Klaus released you and advanced toward Damon.

“We’re a little busy right now, Damon, why don’t you come back later.” Damon took another step forward, as if he were challenging Klaus. “Not without her, I would rather die here than leave you alone with her.”

“Well, mate, that can be arranged, besides you interrupted us.” He stalked back over to you and wrapped his arms around your waist. Damon let out a growl and only ceased approaching when Klaus threaded his fingers through your hair and tilted your head, allowing your throat to come into view. You let out a sob, trying to free your hands, trying to escape this monster. You felt your heartbeat racing, loudly throbbing. Klaus taking no time to point it out to Damon.

“Now, Damon, do you think that’s from fear or excitement? It’s beating so fast, it might burst.”

Damon had exhausted his options, “Please Klaus, just let her go, she has nothing to do with this…” he swallowed loudly, “I’ll do anything.”

“Anything?” Klaus burst out laughing still holding you, his laughter causing you to shake harder.

Klaus released you and stalked towards Damon, wrapping a strong hand around his throat and looking deeply into his eyes, compelling him.

“I want you to undress her, slowly.” Damon growled and with stiff motions walked toward you. It was clear he was trying to fight what he had just been commanded to do, but your life was at stake and he would gladly trade your humility for your life. He reached up and touched your chin, looking at you.

“I’m so sorry, Y/N.” he breathed as he ripped your shirt down the middle and slowly pulled it off you. You decided to spare Damon and tried pulling yourself from the ceiling again. You felt Damon grab you harshly around the waist and started to pull your pants off, slower this time. You could tell he was fighting this part more. You looked at him and he was crying, silently, angrily. He stepped back when he had completed his task almost afraid to look at you, but more afraid to leave Klaus alone with your now exposed body.

“Very good,” Klaus grinned. He strode over to a cabinet and pulled out a small, dainty looking knife.

“No!” Damon shouted, tackling Klaus, successfully bringing him down. The two vampires rolled around on the ground and you once again climbed up on the rope holding you in place and tried to use the weight of your body to pull it free. You heard a loud grunt and Klaus was pinning Damon on the ground, his hand on his chest pushing in towards Damon’s heart. Damon’s faced twisted in pain.

“Klaus! No, no, please, hurt me! Not him, please, please!” You screamed, the tears once again falling freely. Damon looked at you with even more pain on his face if that was possible.

Klaus used Damon’s body to push himself up.

“Fine, let’s kill two birds with one stone, shall we?” He looked back at Damon again and shoved the knife in his hand. “You do it then.”

“No,” Damon says, disgusted by the idea of hurting you. This enraged Klaus and he spat. “Do it or I’ll do it myself, it’s your choice.”

Damon sighed and reached up to cut you down. You would have fallen to the floor if he had not grabbed your hips and held you against him. You offered your still bound wrists to him and he kissed your forehead, pressing down hard. As lightly as he dared, he pierced your skin with the tip of the knife and slowly dragged it across, creating a cut a couple of inches long. You glanced up at him and his veins were throbbing under his eyes and it was obvious he was holding his breath. After making the cut, he steps away from you and gasps for breath. You cover the cut immediately putting pressure on it in an attempt to stop the bleeding.

“Wow, I am impressed,” Klaus smirked, “Now that you’ve prepared our lunch, we feast.” He speeds over to you and picks you up and forced your injured arm under his nose. He inhaled deeply, his eyes rolling to the back of his head. You struggled in his arms, Damon hovering over the two of you, unsure what to do. The smell of your blood still bothering him. “Damon, how did you find the strength not to just dig into her all the time? She is one of the sweetest smelling humans I have ever come across in my years. God, I want to know what she’d taste like.”

“Don’t you fucking dare. If you drink from her I will rip you apart.” Damon promises.

“Not even a little sip? Or is that because you know that once I start, I will never stop?” Klaus taunts and lowers it to his mouth. You struggle and attempt to pry your arm from his iron clad grip. Just as he is about to lick a stripe up the cut he drops your arm but still keeps a tight grip on your body.

“You know what, I’m going to be generous, you won’t ever have to fight the urge to kill her ever again.“ He lifted his own arm to his mouth and bit and then forced his blood down your throat.

“No!” you squealed trying to spit it out, but the damage had been done. You felt Klaus’s uninjured arm wrap around your neck and the last thing you see is Damon looking at you with those impossibly blue eyes, frozen in fear. His lips mouthing the words, “I’m sorry.” and then it all goes black.

Sorry this one took so long to post, I’ve been working on it for like a week, but hope you guys like it!


Back (Avengers/Guardians of the Galaxy)

“I can’t believe it!” Peter smiled. “I’m going back to earth!” He cheered. Gamora playfully rolled her eyes. “I am groot.” Groot smiled. “Calm down Quill, you’re givin me a headache.” Rocket groaned. “Let him, Rocket. He hasn’t been on Earth in like 30 years.” You told him.

“What’s it like?” Peter asked you. “as you recall, I haven’t been on Earth in 3 years. A lot can change in three years.” You told him.

You were an Avenger and worked for S.H.I.E.L.D in the science department. They were planning on a space exploration after the battle of New York, which you volunteered.

The shuttle malfunctioned, and your crew died, and you would have too if not for the Guardian, and for three years you’ve been fighting with them, protecting the galaxy.

“Alright, we’re close enough for you to make contact with them.” Gamora told you. “Great, Rocket did you finish the device?” You asked him and he scoffed. “ “Course I finished it.”

You turned it on and there was just static. “Are you sure you did fuck up?” You asked Rocket. “Why you lil-” He was going to ran towards you, but Peter held him back. “Let me go.” Rocket said.

“Hello?” You heard someone say over the radio. “Hello? Is this S.H.I.E.L.D?” You asked. “Who is this?” The man asked. “Y/N. Y/N Stark.” You said. “That’s not possible. She died in the shuttle.” The man said.

“Well, clearly I didn’t. Who is this?” You asked. Static. You groaned, “Let’s land this.” You told Peter. “You  sure? Won’t they think we’re Aliens and shoot us down?” Peter asked you.

“No, the worst they would do is take us to S.H.I.E.L.D.” You said and he walked to the cockpit. “Give me the coordinates.” Peter told you. You handed him a piece of paper with the coordinates to the Stark Tower.

Peter flew the Milano to the coordinates, gaining attention as you entered the atmosphere. When you arrived, Peter landed the Milano on the roof. “I should go out first.” You said. “Be careful.” Peter told you and gave you a kiss.

“I’m right behind ya.” Rocket said, pulling out his biggest gun. You opened the door, and there were Iron Man suits surrounding the Milano. You put your hands up, while Rocket blew them up.

“Dude! Not now!” You said, and gave him a little kick. “Fine.” He groaned, setting his gun down. “Tony?” You asked. “it’s me, Y/N.” You told the suits. One of them opened, and Tony walked out.

“Y/N?” He asked. “You’re alive?” He asked, then ran towards you and pulled you into a hug. “We thought you died.” He said. “Yeah, I tried contacting S.H.I.E.LD but nothing worked.” You said.

“S.H.I.E.L.D is gone.” He told you. You pulled away from the hug, “What do you mean gone?” You asked. “Last year Cap and Natasha found out that Hydra infiltrated S.H.I.E.L.D since the beginning.” He told you.

“Anyway, who’s this little guy?” Tony asked as he petted Rocket. “I wouldn’t do that.” You said, “Get your filthy paws off of me.” Rocket said and pushed Tony’s hands off of him. "What the fuck it that?“ Tony asked in shock.

"His name is Rocket.” you said. “Peter, Gamora, Drax, Groot, come on out.” You shouted. Drax was the first to come out, Gamora followed behind him and Peter came out with groot in his hands.

“Who are these guys?” Tony asked. “We should get the team, cause I don’t want to explain it more than once.” You told him. “Yeah, okay.” Tony nodded.  


The Avengers stood there, in shock as The Guardians walked in. “Alright so. These guys saved me from the shuttle. Her name is Gamora, that is Drax, this is Rocket. This is Groot and that’s my boyfriend Peter.” You told them. “You named a plant?” Clint laughed.

“I am Groot.” Groot smiled and moved his arms. Clint shut up, and his eye widened. “So, you have a talking Raccoon and a talking plant…great.” Clint said. “Don’t call him a raccoon. ” You told him.

“Hi, Peter. Nice to meet you.” Peter smiled and looked around the Tower. “So what do we call you guys?” Steve asked. “They’re called The Guardians of the Galaxy.” You told him.

“Nice to meet you. Name’s Hawkeye.” Clint said. “Why?” Drax asked. “Because I’ve got an eye like a hawk.” Clint told him. “That doesn’t seem pleasant."Drax told him.

"I just gotta ask, where did you get that ship?” Tony asked. “Long story…I stole it.” Peter said. “I’m kidding, I stole stuff to buy it.” Peter said. “Y/N, you should get checked. Three years in space can’t be good for a human.” Natasha told you.

“I feel fine, just tired.” You said. “I still have your room."  Tony said. "Great, we’ll need four more.” Peter said, and kissed your cheek. “You’re not sleeping in the same room as my sister.” Tony told him.

“What you got against the two love birds, old man?” Rocket asked. “Old man?” Tony said. “I smell liquor.” Rocket said then walked away. Pete set Groot on the table, and groot grew to his full size, which surprised The Avengers.

Groot then walked over to Steve and Tony, and pulled them into a tight hug. “I am Groot.” He said. “We know, big ma…tree.” Tony said. “That’s all he can say.” Rocket said as he walked back with two bottles of scotch.

“This’ll be fun.” You smiled.

anonymous asked:

James March imagines please? It's present day... james (a ghost) & reader have been together for a few months. He doesn't give her enough attention bc of his hobby, so she gets annoyed & tries to do things to get his attention by making him jealous. Thank u thank u!

Title: I’m Sorry.

Pairings: James March x Female!Reader

A/N: I changed it slightly

Warnings: Murder, cheating, blood.

The last few months had been tough. Y/N spent hours hunched over a laptop, typing frantically to get her essays done. She couldn’t wait for the holiday that was coming up, she could sleep until long after noon and spend her days doing whatever she pleased. Instead of slaving at school and then work.

To make matters worse, when she wasn’t working on essays, she wanted to spend time with her boyfriend, James, but he didn’t seem to have time for her. He was always disappearing and returning at ungodly hours, followed by Miss Evers. Y/N had no clue where James went, but she knew it couldn’t possibly be anything good.

Y/N had to trust James, but she feared he had found someone new. Someone who could give him attention all hours of the day, instead of Y/N who could only provide attention after she’d finished her work.

Y/N sighed, strolling through the seemingly endless corridors of the Hotel Cortez. She hadn’t spotted James - not that she was looking - and assumed he was in one of the hotel rooms. Probably fucking some gorgeous guest, anxiety swelled inside her as she flinched at the thought. James wouldn’t do that, would he?

Y/N sprinted down the stairs, rushing to the front desk. Liz turned around and greeted her with a smile, which soon vanished when she saw the worried expression etched on her face.

“What’s wrong, Hon?” Liz asked, leaning forward over the desk.

“I’ve finished all my work and I wanted to know where James is.” Y/N admitted.

“Mr March… is - er - busy at the moment.” Liz stuttered.

“Liz, don’t lie. What room is he in?” Y/N demanded.

“Room 64. You might want to knock.” Liz advised and Y/N went on her way.

Y/N ignored Liz’s advise and barged into the room. A scream ripped through her throat when she saw James hunched over a lifeless body, blood all over his white shirt and face. He turned around, eyes wide, his dark hair matted against his forehead.

Y/N staggered backwards, back hitting the wall as tears fell. She stuck her hand out, warning James to stay back.

“You don’t approve?” James queried, raising an eyebrow and tilting his head to the side. The action would’ve made Y/N swoon before but now it just made her sick to the stomach. He was a cold-blooded murderer. How was she to know she wasn’t next?

“Of course I don’t. You killed an innocent person!” Y/N snarled.

“Hardly innocent, Dear, he tried to steal from us.”

“Oh he tried to steal from you? That totally justifies you killing him.” Y/N sassed, lower lip wobbling as she tried to stay strong.

“Darling, don’t be mad. This is my hobby, this is who I am.”

“Your hobby? So this is a regular thing? God, James, what is wrong with you?” She hissed, her hand grasping onto the door knob.

“I refuse to change who I am for you. I’ve done this my entire life and after.” James yelled causing Y/N to flinch.

She wrenched open the door and sprinted down the hall. James stumbled out of the room, glaring at her retreating figure. He turned to Miss Evers and told her to dispose the body. He sighed, following after Y/N calmly.

Y/N sunk down on the chair at the bar, ordering a whiskey and wiping her eyes. She had to remain calm but it was damn near impossible, the love of her life was a murderer. Y/N had known since they met he was a ghost, but she couldn’t digest that he was a murderer so easily.

She gulped down the whiskey, slamming the glass down in the table and demanding a refill. If she were to return to her hotel room with James tonight, she’d need all the liquid courage she could get.

A dark stranger sat down next to her and Y/N hazily snuck a glance. His skin was the colour of honey and his hair was a lustrous black. His eyes as blue as the sea and he sent her a small smirk, setting a kaleidoscopic of butterflies to erupt in her stomach. She finished her second glass of whiskey and ordered another. Her head becoming slightly hazy.

“Hello.” She slurred, although she sounded perfectly fine to her own ears.

“Hello.” The stranger smiled, amused by her drunken state.

Y/N fell forward, but the stranger was quick to catch her.

“Take your filthy paws off my girlfriend.” James voice boomed.

“Sweetheart, do you want to come to my room?” The stranger asked, ignoring James.

“Yes, please.” Y/N grinned and the stranger helped her to her feet, wrapping his arm around her waist.

“Y/N, do not.” James seethed, moustache twitching slightly as he bit back a snarl. He glared at Y/N, making her detach from the stranger. James let out a sigh of relief but it was short lived as she grabbed him by the collar and pulled his lips down to hers.

James erupted with jealousy. Every fibre of his body telling him to rip the stranger apart from his hands. He was touching what was his.

He marched over to the pair and pulled Y/N off the stranger. He shoved the stranger backward, glaring daggers at him; if looks could kill, he’d be six feet under. James guided Y/N back to their room, knowing if he tried to kill the man that Y/N would never forgive him.

He heaved as he attempted to open the door and hold Y/N who was flailing in his grip. He finally got it open and guided Y/N in, shoving her into the bed. She sighed, eyes fluttering shut.

“I’m sorry.” She squeaked, taking James by surprise.


“I’m sorry. I’m not fond of your hobby, but as you said you’ve been doing it for a long time, longer than you’ve known me.”

James sighed, sinking to his knees at the foot of the bed and taking off Y/N’s shoes slowly. He placed a kiss on both of her ankles before standing again. He turned around and pulled out a fresh shirt that belonged to him.

“Sit up, Dear.” He ordered and Y/N groggily did as he asked. She lifted her arms in the air, eyes shut. James pulled her shirt off and replaced it with his own. The action making Y/N’s heart swell. She laid back down and James began to unbutton her jeans, pulling them down her legs and throwing them across the room.

He then stood her up and pulled back the duvet, helping her clamber back in once more and tucking her in, placing a kiss on her lips.

He turned to leave, but Y/N’s hand flew out and wrapped around his wrist.

“Stay with me, please.”

James smiled and ripped of his clothes, leaving him in his underwear. He climbed in beside her, wrapping his arms around her waist and placing a kiss between her shoulder blades.

“Tomorrow, I’ll spend the whole day sigh you, yes? No distractions.”

“I’d like that.” Y/N murmured, not long after James could hear small snores.

He smiled, running his hand up her side. He felt at home when he was with her.

Originally posted by elizabethmarchs

  • โ Uh, do whatever you want, I'm super dead! โž
  • โ You have a symmetrical face. If I took a meat cleaver down the center of your skull, I'd have matching halves. That's very important. โž
  • โ Ring ring, hello? Oh, hold on, it's for you - it's second place. โž
  • โ You know that I ain't bragging. โž
  • โ I'm reading this from Wikipedia, so it has to be true. โž
  • โ Let's hatch a plot blacker than the kettle callin' the pot. โž
  • โ I bet I've got til lunch at least before everyone sees I'm a spaz! โž
  • โ I'm not very hungry - just gimme a double Polar Burger with everything and a cherry soda with chocolate ice cream. โž
  • โ Missed your midterms and flunked shampoo! โž
  • โ Hey turn around, bend over, I'll show you where my shoe fits. โž
  • โ Is that unfair? -- Oh wait, I don't care. โž
  • โ The truth is that you're such a dork, you kinda make it cool. โž
  • โ We got more balls than the team we cheer for! โž
  • โ Miss Goody Two Shoes makes me wanna barf. โž
  • โ Even mocking cheerleaders cannot hide the emptiness in my soul. โž
  • โ They're dogs! No! Lower than that, they're fleas on dogs! โž
  • โ I'm a trust fund baby, you can trust me. โž
  • โ The dinosaurs choked on the dust, they died because God said they must. โž
  • โ Happy kitties, sleepy puppies, tiny duckies, sparkly ponies... โž
  • โ My teen angst bullshit has a body count. โž
  • โ Give my love to the leprechauns. โž
  • โ I thought you were a spoiled, rich, uptight little white bitch now I think you're just white. โž
  • โ I am tired of living alone with my cat! โž
  • โ You drink a lot of Red Bull, don't you? โž
  • โ If I get blood on the carpet my mother will kill me. โž
  • โ Some say that I'm a pompous creep - somehow I don't lose that much sleep. โž
  • โ Such a blunder. Sometimes it makes me wonder why I even bring the thunder. โž
  • โ Shakin' at the high school hop. โž
  • โ I've got lots of experience with not fitting in. Do you need some pointers? โž
  • โ Ugh. You've got a left hand, use it. โž
  • โ Showing up here took some guts, time to rip 'em out. โž
  • โ Keep that pelvis far from me! โž
  • โ Thanks, but I don't need voices in my head today. โž
  • โ You don't wanna hear all the horny details. โž
  • โ I gotta go get my asthma spray... โž
  • โ Your perfume smells like your daddy's got money. โž
  • โ Does your mommy know you eat all this crap? โž
  • โ Jesus, you're making me sound like Air Supply. โž
  • โ Language, honey child, please. โž
  • โ Like a beautiful blonde pineapple. โž
  • โ I don't rat my hair! โž
  • โ My dog speaks more eloquently than thee. โž
  • โ Damn, you're in worse shape than the national debt is in. โž
  • โ You're my last meal on death row. โž
  • โ I've got a big butt, well so what? It's good as any other! โž
  • โ I led a protest march against insensitive cartoons! โž
  • โ Some people are SO touchy. โž
  • โ Mama gave birth to the hand-jive. โž
  • โ It's hot in here and kinda smells like someone wet the bed... โž
  • โ Oh... I wanted to answer the puppy question? โž
  • โ You're absolutely right - should have shot him in the mouth, that would've shut him up. โž
  • โ I haven't slept since 1992. โž
  • โ Malum in se is an action evil in itself. Assault, murder, white shoes after labor day. โž
  • โ You need a cite a more specific grievance. Here's an itemized list of all these years of diagreements. โž
  • โ Donate my car to crippled kids, or to those ghetto moms on crack. โž
  • โ I'm, like, gonna cry - I got tears comin' outta my nose! โž
  • โ Keep your filthy paws off of my silky drawers. โž
  • โ Color me stoked. โž
  • โ Yo, who the f is this? โž
  • โ You've got the best friggin shoes! โž
  • โ Keep it positive as you slap her to the floor! โž
  • โ Come on! Let's go krunkin' in the parking lot! โž
  • โ I've come of age to be a raging castrating bitch! โž
  • โ I'll be Socrates throwing verbal rocks at these mediocrities. โž
  • โ Really stick it to the phallocentric war machine! โž
  • โ Must we all descend into madness? โž
  • โ It's a work of genius. I couldn't undo it if I tried.... and I tried. โž
  • โ Dear God... it's scented. โž
  • โ Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. โž
  • โ So go on, here's my head, just hit it with a rock. โž
  • โ I want a devil in skin tight leather. โž
  • โ You've come so far why now are you pulling on my dick? โž
  • โ You know, for a greasy little nobody, you do have good bone structure. โž
  • โ You ain't never caught a rabbit. โž
  • โ Honestly, it's kind of draining... โž
  • โ I just did what you wished you could but you don't have the balls. โž
  • โ I'm dazzling! Magnificent! I am the one percent! โž
  • โ Now what I'm going to say may seem indelicate... โž
  • โ I'm gonna French kiss with tongue like I dreamed I'd do - and not just with my pillow! โž
  • โ It's like hearing a ticking sound coming from unmarked packages! โž
  • โ Someone's had their morning coffee... โž
  • โ We're what killed the dinosaurs! โž
  • โ I don't know what you heard, but whatever it is, they started it. โž
  • โ Fine, okay, I'm gay! โž
  • โ You can set my bones and I know CPR. โž
  • โ Immigrants - we get the job done. โž
  • โ Man. What rich, romantic planet are you from? โž
  • โ Whaaaaaaat. โž
  • โ What can I say? I'm a sucker for a happy ending. โž
  • โ Fuck me gently with a chainsaw. โž
  • โ Awesome... wow. โž
  • โ I'm bigger than John Lennon! โž
  • โ I will kill your friends and family to remind you of my love. โž
  • โ If you're going for mediocre, you've done great! โž
  • โ Alright, we can't break out of here, but we sure can break a sweat! โž
  • โ Gotta be going to that malt shop in the sky. โž
  • โ It's got groove! It's got meaning! โž
  • โ When I fight I make the other side panicky! โž
  • โ That is a metro hetero jerk! โž
  • โ Love is like forever this is no time to economize! โž
  • โ Their thinkin' is stinkin' and a little outdated. โž
  • โ I'm probably too cool for you, so friend request denied. โž
  • โ You're on Jiffy Pop detail. โž
  • โ I don't have to always be right - when I'm with you, I just am. โž
  • โ I'm raisin' hell and I'm a felon in a four foot frame. โž
  • โ Guys who wear that get beat up on my street. โž
  • โ It's like making love to you all night, NO WAIT! It feels so much better! โž
  • โ No sleep for you, better chug that Mountain Dew. โž
  • โ All I got was a running nose and Asiatic flu. โž
  • โ You ain't no friend of mine. โž
  • โ We have fought on like, seventy-five different fronts. โž
  • โ I'm not freaking out, I'm really okay, I'm totally chill. โž
  • โ If your Irish boy tires of you, you're allowed to shoot him in the knees. โž
  • โ You ever see somebody ruin their own life? โž
  • โ The more you jump around and scream, the sexier you seem. โž
  • โ Peachy keen, jellybean. โž
  • โ Both your hair and shoes are flat. โž
  • โ Lookin' hot, Cream of Mushroom! โž
  • Avdol: What is on your hand? Motor oil? Peanut butter? That is one filthy paw.
  • Polnareff: It’s only blood and it’s not like it’s mine. C'mon Avdol. Avdol. Avdol, please. Just read it. Read it, Avdol.
  • Avdol: No.
  • Polnareff: Joseph says that you’re a palm reader, y'know. He said that you’re… psychotic.
  • Avdol: I’m not Psychic.
  • Polnareff: I think you are. I’ll give you 10 bucks.
  • Avdol: You only have 2 in your pocket.
  • Polnareff: *pulls out 2 dollars*
  • Avdol:
  • Polnareff: Wow!