fiinds

Știi cum e cu dragostea? Toți ne îndrăgostim, iar creierul nostru înregistrează persoana iubită ca fiind un om ce nu va pleca niciodată. Dar e o iluzie. Toți pleacă. Toți. Și din cauza asta, creierul face planuri cu persoana aia. Că ne vom căsători, vom avea copii, vom fi fericiți peste 10-15 ani. Se creează iluzia că nimic nu are rost fără acea persoană, că mori fără ea, că ești un nimic fără acel om pe care îl iubești. Și atunci când pleacă persoana din viața noastră, creierul nostru suferă un șoc. Îi e greu să mai restabilească ordinea. Și devii un dezastru. Nu mai mănânci, nu mai ești sociabil, nu mai ai chef de nimeni și nimic. În tine e un gol, întuneric, liniște… Dar într-o zi o să-ți aduci aminte cum erai înainte să cunoști persoana respectivă. Și așa vei realiza că poți trăi fără acel om, pentru că ai putut și înainte. Poți! Pentru că înainte să apară, viața ta nu depindea de prezența unui om. Viața ta depindea de tine. Și acum depinde. Și va depinde de tine. Mereu.
—  gandurinocturne
Ultimele cuvinte ale unei fete care a murit in urma unui accident de masina! Au facut o intreaga Europa sa planga…

„Am fost la o petrecere și mi-am amintit ce-mi spuseseși mai devreme. Mi-ai spus să nu beau alcool așa că am băut suc. M-am simţit mândră de mine așa cum tu mi-ai zis ca ar trebui să mă simt. Mi-ai spus să nu mă urc la volan dacă am băut în ciuda a ceea ce unii dintre prietenii mei aveau să îmi spună. Te-am ascultat pe tine și mi-am dat seama ca de fiecare dată, că sfatul tau era unul foarte sănătos.”

„Când petrecerea s-a încheiat, oamenii de acolo s-au urcat la volan deși multi dintre ei nu erau în stare să conducă. Eu m-am îndreptat către mașina mea știind că voi ajunge acasă în sigurantă. O clipa nu m-am gândit la ce avea să mi se întâmple, ceea ce mi s-a întâmplat, mamă. Acum mă aflu fără pic de putere pe strada și il ascult pe polițistul care spune că băiatul care a provocat accidentul era beat.”

„Mamă, vocea lui pare ca fiind foarte îndepărtată. Am atât de mult sânge pe mine, pe lângă mine și ma abţin din răsputeri să nu plâng.Am auzit doctorii care spuneau
–Fata asta va muri.
Se pare că tânărul care a condus cu viteză a decis să bea, dar să mor eu. De ce, mamă? De ce oamenii aleg să fie iresponsabili știind că vor distruge viețile altora? E prea mare, mamă, e prea mare durerea.

Te rog, spune-i surorii mele să nu plângă, spune-i tatei să fie puternic căci atunci când voi merge în rai voi avea grijă de voi toţi.” „Cineva trebuia sa-l fi învăţat pe acel tânăr că nu trebuie să bei și apoi să te urci la volan. Poate dacă parintii lui i-ar fi spus asta, acum nu mai eram pe patul de moarte.” „Încep să respir din ce în ce mai greu, mamă, mi-e frică, vreau să te ţin de mână. Vreau să îţi spun cât de mult te iubesc mamă. La revedere”

Ce am invatat de cand sunt adolescent.  
1.Scoala te invata prostiile societati.
2.Hainele de firma te fac ori adolescent fitos ori adolescent de banii gata
3.Banii pe care ii ai la scoala zilnic te fac ori superior ori inferior.
4.Notele mici te descriu ca o persoana proasta, notele mari ca fiind o persoana cu un viitor in viata
5.Daca fumezi tigari de tip Ashima,Marble esti sarac.
6.Daca ai prietena/prieten mai dezvoltat nu ai gusturi
7.Ai grija ce telefon scoti din buzunar, altfel esti considerat sarac.
8.Daca ai o poza cu un decolteu mai larg esti considerata carpa societati.
9.Numarul de like-uri si follow pe instagram te fac popular.
10.Nu esti adolescent daca nu te droghezi sau daca nu bei alcool.
— 

badger life page

1/∞

Degeaba mă judeci că fumez! Nu fumez de plăcere, fumez ca să uit.

Degeaba afirmi că te ignor! De fapt, îmi e rușine și nu știu cum să-ți vorbesc.

Te superi că nu-ți spun că te iubesc! Prefer fapte, nu vorbe.

Te superi că nu-ți spun ce am pe suflet! Nu vreau să te împovărez și pe tine.

Mă etichetezi ca fiind un ciudat! Din contră, sunt original.

Mă etichetezi ca fiind un bolnav! Doar oamenii bolnavi afirmă că sunt sănătoși.

Mamă, asta e pentru tine.

Plâng, mamă..
Adică, știi asta. Pentru că timp de 3 ore m-ai auzit plângând dar nu ți-a păsat.
Ai venit la un moment dat în camera mea și mi-ai zis să mă culc că am liceu.
Știi cât de tare a durut?
Am ochii roși, fața plină de lacrimi iar tu.. tu doar m-ai privit și mi-ai zis să mă culc.
MAMĂ, DOARE.
Știi cât de frig e?
Știi cum e să te chinui să respiri?
Știi cât de tare doare?
Știi cum e să simți doar durere și să nu înțelegi de ce simți asta și cum poți să simți asta, fiind un copil? Cum toată durerea pe care o ai în interior îți oprește respirația?
Mamă, îmi creez propriul ocean în jurul meu..iar eu.. eu nu știu să înot.. Nu vreau liceu. Nu vreau oamenii pe care îi văd în fiecare zi. Nu vreau să mai respir.
Am vrut să vin la tine, mamă..
Credeam că dormi. Și voiam să te trezesc, să îți explic tot. Să îți spun cât de tare doare și că nu mai pot.
Dar.. nu am de ce să vin să îți zic toate astea, nu?
Mamă.. când ai venit în cameră tot ce te rugam în interiorul meu era să mă îmbrățișezi și să mă asculți..
Dar tu.. ai plecat.. O să regreți.
O să regreți că nu ai întrebat nimic. Că nu ai făcut nimic.
Și eu o să regret ce o să fac. Dar.. pentru mine nu o să mai conteze.
Vreau doar să știi că îmi pare rău.. pentru tot. ÎȚI JUR.
Sper ca într-o zi, să vezi blogul ăsta și să citești toate postările. Să îți pară rău de persoana care posta în fiecare zi și să vrei să o ajuți.
Îmi doresc asta.
Și încă ceva. Mai există un copil în viața ta.
Nu știu ce simte sau dacă simte ceva. Dar.. te rog să te pui lângă el, și să îl asculți. Nu știi câte urlete poate ascunde un zâmbet de copil.

I Knew I Would See You Again (”Why Now?” Part 2) - Jughead Jones Imagine (Riverdale)

Part 1 | Part 3

 

Hello again, I noticed that you liked my first imagine „Why Now?” and I decided to do a part two of it! Some people also asked me to. I am very happy that you liked part one, you guys amazed me! I really didn’t expect that, thank you for reading it! If you didn’t read „Why Now?” and just came across this imagine, please click above on Part 1 to read, although you will not understand anything. I also made a special page where I will post all of my Imagines. It’s down here:

 

Imagines

 

About this part I still don’t have any warnings to do because it’s too innocent, haha. I don’t own any of the TV series’s rights and the persons I’m mentioning here aren’t like that in the real life. This is just a story made up by me, meaning that the descriptions of the characters that I’m writing about are based on how the Riverdale’s cast is portraying them. It’s a work of fiction. Enjoy your reading. xx


PLOT: You stayed in Houston for a year. During all this time, you’ve managed to get in touch with your friends who have made you aware of everything that has happened in Riverdale so far. Even so, you missed them a lot and as soon as summer came, you informed your parents that you are going back to your hometown to celebrate your  18th birthday. You are about to find things that will make you regret you have not been with your friends, but most importantly, you will see him again.


You didn’t even feel how time had passed. It’s been a year, a whole year since you left Riverdale for a fresh start and for a better life. It wasn’t like that for you, you had no idea how you got through it. You only wanted the things to be good between you and your parents, but you couldn’t lie to yourself. You’ve suffered and if you’re gonna remember the day you left … The way things went off, you would probably feel sorry. You were absolutely convinced that you weren’t going to disappoint Veronica, Archie, Betty … Jughead, they knew that too. Every one of them kept their word: Archie called you every single day, you would talk to him for hours and he would finally sing something short just to cheer you up. You wouldn’t forget to ask him if Jughead was alright and he would say that he would never lie to you about anything. Archie and Jughead were best friends, you knew he would never abandon Jughead. You and Veronica would facetime everytime you were free. You always told her that Houston is a nice place and that you feel very good here, but you wouldn’t be convincing. It wasn’t the fact that you hated that place, it was just the fact that you knew anyone around here. You were the new girl, the new neighbor … It was tiring for you. Eventually Veronica would make you laugh even if you couldn’t even smile and you would almost fall asleep while talking to her. The blonde one – Betty, was the most worried about you.  She would ask you thousands of times if you are okay and send you a lot of pictures with her and the others so you can watch them whenever the longing became too intense. They made you forget, somehow. For a while, it wasn’t enough.

Then, everything started to get easier. You were accommodating with your new school’s schedule, studying most of the time and getting ready for exams. Sometimes you would think of how you used to eat lunch with Archie, Veronica, Betty and Jughead outside and how anyone could make you feel as they did. There was no fun. There weren’t delicious chocolate milkshakes as the ones at Pop’s were. There was no one named Jughead who would wear his crown-shaped beanie even if he was inside of a house. It was incredibly hard for you not to think about him all this time. You remembered how you cried the first night away from Riverdale and how lonely you felt. Jughead called you that night, you could barely talk. He tried to calm you down, but it wasn’t possible. You simply left him alone after he confessed he liked you. After he tried to show his true feelings towards you. You always knew how odd he felt doing it, and you could imagine how hard it was for him. And you did what? You were miles away. You would have understood him if he was mad at you, though he said he wasn’t. You almost wanted him too. What if everytime you hung up the phone, he will not talk to anyone else for a long time? What if he wasn’t himself anymore? What if he was stuck? You’re still asking this and you are afraid of a real answer. You felt him so close to you than he have ever been before and you couldn’t show him the same feelings. Sometimes you would want to feel his body pressed to yours, to cuddle him because you never had the chance to do that. Your mother was the first one to fiind out how it was with this Jughead guy, you didn’t need to explain anything to her. She saw you being affected and tried to make you feel better. You didn’t let her. Neither your dad. It was their fault. It took you long enough to get used to the idea, still, you haven’t looked for any other boy’s affection.

When summer came, you knew you had a chance. You talked with Veronica in time, telling her you plan to come back to Riverdale for your birthday. She almost started to scream from happiness when you told her that, but you mentioned her not to tell Archie, Betty or Jughead about that. You wanted to be a surprise. She told you you’d spend the night at her when you got there and assured you she’d keep her mouth shut. Both of you were so excited. You couldn’t help but think about everyone’s faces when they’ll see you. You couldn’t wait to see them too, it was like you were already feeling their giant tight hug against your body. You asked your parents to let you go back, you could not forget this important detail. They couldn’t believe it when they heard you. Your father was red from anger. „No way!” they both would tell you. Of course you couldn’t accept that, so you continued to beg for their approval. They did not want you to leave because they wanted you to be with them on your birthday, not in that town. They seemed so disgusted, as if they had not lived there once. You did everything in your power until you were able to convince them. You promised a short term, after which you would come back home. You needed your friends and some more familiar surroundings for a while. They understood it hard, but you were glad that they did. You were excited to see even Cheryl who was never incredibly excited about your presence. You heard a lot of shocking news about her brother’s death and you wanted to find out more. Veronica didn’t give you too many details, she wanted to play with you. You wanted Cheryl and her family to be okay after all the rumblings they’ve been through since the tragedy.

So the days have passed quite fast with you trying to fullfill your time as much as possible so you wouldn’t need to wait that long. You suddenly saw yourself with all the luggage done, almost as if you wanted to live faster than you should’ve. Jughead noticed how changed you were every time he called you and you felt him quite surprised. He got used to make you feel better, and to smile sweetly and cheeky everytime you two would facetime. It was funny to lie him ’cause it wasn’t anything serious, you couldn’t wait to meet his mesmerizing green eyes again.

This time you’ll tell him too. You’ll tell him everything.


                                              ***


You couldn’t stand the place. The taxi driver seemed to drive too slow for your patience. The night was still young. You were so close to your hometown again, you couldn’t believe it. You thought it was a dream, wanting someone to pinch you.  You blinked many times, looking out the window and admiring the landscape. You missed the strange appearance of Riverdale because you still were used to it. You’d have preferred this silence than all that noise in Houston.  Before you leave home, your mom and dad have warned you: you were not allowed to break your promise. You asked them to come with you so that you will be together on your birthday, it wouldn’t bother you. But your father had his job and wouldn’t let just your mother to come with you. You kinda felt that once you’ll see your friends, you couldn’t leave anymore. But nobody had to know that yet.

You took your phone out of your pocket and checked to see if Veronica texted you. Until now she constantly did that, she couldn’t wait to see you, God. You wondered if she was still the same as you knew her. You wondered if her family was okay, you wanted to know if her love life was up and you wished she didn’t suffer because of your departure. You felt like you couldn’t resist much more, it’s been so long

You asked the taxi driver to leave you a little farther from Veronica’s house because you didn’t wanted her to see you or wait for you. You just walked a little, and you never imagined it could be so hard with all the luggage and emotions that were not going to leave you too soon. You immediately recognized the huge building and increased your peace. A little more.

A man opened the door for you when he saw you wearing so much weight. You mumbled a „thank you” and then entered, leading directly to Veronica’s apartment. Standing in front of the door you felt your knees weak. You took a deep breath and the knocked at the door.

Almost immediately you heard Veronica’s voice from the inside:

„Y/N should be there in a few moments.” You couldn’t help but smile when you heard the sound of the door opening.

After that, you just felt like your strength was gone.

A tall girl dressed in a red top and some skinny black jeans looked at you from head to toe. Her dark hair was left free and hang just above her shoulders, as you were used with her wearing it like that. You whined and you covered you mouth with your hand, slipping the suitcasses on the floor.

„Oh my God.” You heard Veronica exhaling. It could’ve happen literally everything in this moment and you would notice nothing but one of your dearest friends who was looking at you extremly shocked. „Oh my God!” You heard her again. „Y/N!” She wrapped her hands around your neck and squealed. You felt like your heartbeats stopped.

„Hello to you too, Veronica” You tried to say even if you felt like she was strangling you.

„Jessus Christ, are you kidding me, Y/N?! Why didn’t you tell me that- …”

„I guess I wanted to surprise you?” She faced you when she heard your voice. Her eyes were full of life. It practically screamed: „This is the real home you need!

„Hell, I missed you so much!” She yelled, hugging you again. You started to laugh, but you were too excited, so it came out more like a trembling moan. You weren’t allowed to cry.

„I missed you too!” You stroked her back until you heard her mother’s voice from inside the apartment. The door was wide open. „Wha-What have you been doing lately?” You swallowed a lump in your throat trying to stay still on you own two feets.

She tried to answer you but Hermione interrupted her from behind.

„Veronica hun’, what was that- …” She stopped when she saw you. „Wait, is this …” Veronica turned her head to her, nodding quickly.

„It’s Y/N mom! Look at her!”

Hermione smiled warmly.

„What are you doing here, dear? It’s so unexpected, I can’t believe you’re back.”

„I needed to come back here. You have no idea how hard it was for me in the last months …” Veronica held her arm on your upper back. Now you only needed a few minutes. Your friend had to tell you everything that happened while you were away.

„Come in. Don’t stay there, we have pretentious neighbours.” Hermione said. You missed the way she treated you, sometimes she would have been better than your own mother. You entered the luxurious apartment, looking around. Nothing was changed. You’ve noticed all the things in their place, the couch on which you and Veronica used to fall asleep while watching movies, the glass coffee table, the plants … Too familiar.

The two women helped you to carry your luggage and immediately afterwards you sat down on the couch. You felt that Veronica and Hermione were fighting about who will be the one to ask you the first question. There had been nothing special in the city where you stayed, nothing to tell about.

„Everyone will freak out when they’ll see you. Tell me, how is it? How’s Houston?” Veronica asked, coming closer to you.

„Horrendous without you guys. I’m so glad I made my parents let me come.” You sighed.

„Ronnie told me about this. How did they agree?” Veronica’s mother asked.

„I think it was a miracle. I begged them like a dog.” You joked. „Only once I can reach my eighteens. If they did not want to accompany me I had nothing to do.”

„Don’t think about it, you’re here now. That’s what matters the most.” Mumbled Veronica. Her mother was agreeing. ”We really missed you, Y/N, all of us.” You knew it and couldn’t think about anything else. Your heart was empty without them, you imagined that this place was empty too without you all. After all, your group was the soul of Riverdale.

You turned your head to the dark-haired girl.

„I need to know everything. What happened here?” Although you were worried about the answers you were going to receive, nothing will be the same if you didn’t fiind out. You saw Hermione standing up and telling you she will leave you two alone so you can talk. Curious, you looked straight into your friend’s eyes. She started with the beginning. You found out that just a few months after you moved away, Jughead’s father was the main suspect in Jason Blossom’s death. When Jughead had told you about him he believed he couldn’t be guilty of anything. He trusted his father after all, because if he wouldn’t, he would have no one to support him. Veronica’s words scared you because yeah, mr. Jones seemed dangerous but he wasn’t a killer. Plus, when Jason was shot, Jughead’s father worked with Fred Andrews. So it couldn’t be true.

Then, Ronnie started to tell you about the relationship between Jughead and his dad which began to tense when the police was after him. They fought often and Jughead slept for a few days inside the school because he didn’t want to bother Archie anymore. He was destroyed during that time, Archie hardly persuaded him to come back. You imagined a scared, teary Jughead who walked alone on the same streets he was once walking you home on. Your heart skipped a beat.

„Please tell me you took care of him.” You said slowly. Veronica nodded.

„Betty was there for him.” As soon as you heard that sentence, your eyebrows furrowed. You felt shivers on your back. Although you knew that wasn’t her intention, you felt Veronica blaming you, somehow. She didn’t say that it was your fault, it was just the fact that Betty comforted the boy you left behind instead of you. And you weren’t jelous or something, it just … Didn’t feel right. The brunette looked at you cautiously before continuing. Maybe you weren’t prepared to hear her next words. Jughead and Betty were together at some point. You just blinked. Betty was the person who managed to be by his side when you couldn’t.

But you were okay with that.

„It didn’t last long. They broke up after two months.” Continued Veronica. „He thought he could see her the way he saw you.”

„How do you - …” How did Veronica know about Jughead’s feelings towards you? He would not tell anyone, he waited until the last moment to tell you.

„He told us but Archie figured out first.” You remembered the way they would tease you about how you and Jughead were acting in each other’s company. You would’ve smiled if you weren’t worried. „’You alright?” Ronnie asked you.

„I think so. It’s nothing.” You said. As long as you were concerned, things got a bit out of control, you understood that when you realized it was still not sure who Jason’s killer was. Even without you, your friends were trying to find out. Someone was lying and the Blossom family didn’t know what to do.

„I mean, how, Veronica? It’s been a year!” You exclaimed trying to find an appropriate answer in your head.

„It’s complicated. Everyone tell us that.”

Everything was complicated. When you wanted to come back, you were expecting that. You felt that overwhelming sensation again. The negative energy ruled every corner of your body but you welcomed it back with pleasure. If your mom and dad would fiind out what you have found out tonight, they would probably be here within an hour to take you back to Houston. Were you happy feeling so uncertain?

„Tomorrow’s the day. Betty, Archie and Jughead need to know you are back.” After a few minutes when the atmosphere was quiet, your friend’s voice was heard. You did not have the strength to retaliate after all you just heard. Your birthday was in two days and you still had things to do. You were supposed to get ready for seeing him again.

That night, after you talked a bit with Hermione too, you slept with Veronica in her king-size bed. The Blossom’s red hair appeared in front of your eyes everytime you closed them. You almost felt everything Jughead felt when he was alone, barely able to fall asleep.

„Don’t worry, Y/N. You have to feel good. Don’t ruin your time here.” Veronica also told you.

„I’m fine. I know it’ll be fine.”

The next morning Veronica woke you up early so you could dress. She had spoken with Archie and he had invited her to take breakfast at his place. You felt tired but it couldn’t compare to the butterflies you felt in your stomach knowing what yo were about to do. Jughead’s face popped up inside your head. You couldn’t wait to open your arms and let him hug you. Or you would be the one to hug him? It didn’t really matter as long as you were about to feel him that close again. 

„C’mon.” Veronica said, opening the door for you. You said goodbye to Hermione, the you stepped out of the apartment, following your friend. 

„I am so nervous.” You said, as the road shortened and you were getting closer to Archie’s home.

„Well, I’m excited.” Ronnie clapped. You tried to calm down your emotions but it wasn’t possible. You imagined Jughead and Archie, you imaged how Archie’s house looked like and before you knew it, Veronica tried to make sure if she could knock on the door or just enter the house without any announcement.

„Breathe.” She whispered to you once you two stepped in. Before you could say something more, she screamed. „Archie, I’m here!” You tried to stop her but you couldn’t. Then, you heard footsteps approaching. 

„You’re right in time.” Your redhead’s voice was thicker than usual. „The pancakes are- …” But when he saw you, it seemed like his voice vanished.”Y/N?!” You tried to smile as innocently as you could.

„Surprise!” His mouth was already wide open. He slowly approached you as if he was afraid you would disappear.

„No freaking way.” You heard him say. You felt his strong arms wrapped around your waist immediately. You tried to look at Veronica and meeting her gaze, you saw her mouthing an „I told you.” 

„Oh my God, Archie.” You murmured. You felt he was beyond surprised. 

„Are you real? I thought you would never come back …”

„I’m here. One hundred percent real.” You assured him, patting his back. „It’s my birthday tomorrow. I wanted to be here.” He looked at you and for a second, you really thought he was about to start crying. You couldn’t imagine a crying Archie, instead, you wanted to cry so bad. „I miss- …” You tried to speak but he suddenly grabbed your hand. You got through the hallway to the kitchen where you smelled the old delicious pancakes with maple syrup. Then, as if it was a dream, you saw one well-known figure.

You started shaking. Your chest was tightening.

„Hey, Jug?” Archie called him. He turned his head to him but he didn’t notice you at first. Just a minute later, he froze.

Originally posted by unconditionalloveandunicornspawn

„Jughead.” You breathed. If Archie and Veronica would not watch you now, you probably would have gone to him and attacked his lips in a well-deserved kiss. You were as speechless as he was.

He didn’t say a word. Instead, you saw him approaching you. He looked you deep in the eyes and touched your cheeks with his palms. His eyes were watery. No. Please Don’t.

„Y/N?” Your name fell out of his mouth as a weak whisper. He was still wearing his beanie, but this time it was a different color. You hugged him tightly and you whined in his chest.

„I’m sorry.” You told him. You still felt extremely guilty. You didn’t want to hurt him anymore. You wanted to feel him happy. As happy as he was never before.

„Don’t say that. It wasn’t your choice.”

You leaned your forehead to his. 

„Guys?” You almost forgot about the boy and the girl who were awkwardly standing behind you. Archie talked first.

„I’ll call Betty.”

Jughead stepped back and looked at you in owe. You wished he would’ve kiss you without shame. You couldn’t say that loud.

Exactly like that, you enjoyed the presence of your old friends all day long. It honestly felt like it wasn’t real. After so long, you were seeing them again. And when Betty arrived and saw you standing there, you couldn’t handle it anymore and started to cry while you hugged her. They grew up too. You even noticed a small scratch on Jughead’s cheek, and when you asked him about it, he told you that Archie had mistakenly hit him with the joystick in the face when he lost a round at his favorite video game.

„You, silly.” You said, giggling.

Everythig was perfect. You didn’t even dare to ask about Cheryl and her family because you didn’t want to ruin anything. Your friends were incredibly enthusiastic about your returning because they wanted you to have the best birthday ever. Jughead held your hand whenever he had the chance and he didn’t even care if the others were watching you, not even Betty. You felt sorry for her because it was, after all, her ex-boyfriend. She wasn’t bothered at all, she was happy that you were around. You didn’t feel how time passed and before you knew it, looking out the window, it was already dark outside. Until now you’ve been around and at Pop’s with your friends, then you stood in front of the highschool and talked about every possible thing. You also visited Archie’s dad, who was surprised to see you; he was in the middle of a phone call and started balding when he saw you. You wanted to laugh but you didn’t, though.

Right now you and Jughead were on your way to his dad’s trailer. You needed some time alone with him, and around Archie, Betty and Veronica you could not get your plan done. Your hands were intertwined, you felt something strange in your stomach.

„This day was simply amazing. Thank you for welcoming me back this way.” You said.

„Stop thanking us, Y/N. Everyone’s glad that you’re back.” You felt Jughead’s big thumb brushing over your palm. „Will you leave again?” He then asked, in a low tone. 

„I have to.” You answered. You wouldn’t want to leave but you couldn’t stay. Your parents would lock you in your room forever.

You two enjoyed the silence until you arrived and noticed that Jughead’s father didn’t seem to be around. You stood outside. It was hot and the wind was blowing slowly. You leaned your back against the trailer and looked up to the sky.

„Jughead?” He looked at you while his arms were crossed to his chest. „Are you okay?”

„I am.” He nodded. But you didn’t mean that.

„No, are you okay?” You became serious bitting the inside of your cheek. You watched him coming near you. He sighed.

„Yes, Y/N. I am.” You wanted him to tell you how horrible he felt without you, you wanted him to blame you and you wanted him to be angry at you. He wasn’t. He was just enjoying your company. You were an awful person, you knew that.

„I heard about you and Betty.” You spoke out of blue. In a few seconds, he turned his head towards you. 

„Does that bother you? Because- …”

„Jughead relax. It’s okay, I’m okay with that. Don’t worry.”

Silence.

„You know …” He started. „I never stopped thinking of you. Like it only felt right when I was with you.” You felt your throat dry. Your lower lip was already between your teeth and something was devouring you on the inside. You turned your head to him and caught his sad expression. You opened your mouth but no words came out. Before you could figure it out, the space between you and the Jughead began to shrink. In the next moment, it happened. 

His lips stuck to yours as if they were simply meant to be there. Something exploded inside of you. You whimpered instinctively driving your hand to his cheek. Your body pressed more against the trailer behind you while you two kissed deeply and truly. It wasn’t a tongue kiss, it could’ve been just as passionate. You slowly raised your hands up to the end of his beanie and squeezed the little dark hair which was stuck out. You felt him trembeling in the kiss and you knew it was too much for him. But he wouldn’t stop, for you. He pressed his chest to yours and you felt his heart beating. You melted, then and there.

You didn’t know you had your eyes closed until you opened them to look at him while he slowly interrupted the beautiful kiss. He licked his lips, shy and you smiled.

Originally posted by destinyhayden

„You have no idea how good is to know that my father isn’t here now.” He murmured, looking at you with such loving eyes. You didn’t expect him to be like that. 

How amazing he was.

„I like you too, Jug.” You whispered, somehow scared that he would just shut you off.

I knew I would see you again.” He answered, smiling softly. „I don’t want you to leave again, Y/N.” He confessed, staring at the wet ground. 

„I don’t want that either.” When you thought about that, you made yourself sad. You didn’t want to be sad at this moment, you just had the most beautiful kiss in your life. The first kiss that really felt that real. Jughead was always real, he was here all this time, he still was. How unbelievable it was, it was true.

„I think it’s midnight.” You felt his hand reaching to yours again. 

„Maybe …” You said feeling empty. 

Happy birthday, Y/N.” Your smile though it was not as big as it should’ve been, it was there. You wanted to push everything away, every bad thought, every cry for help … You just wanted him. You felt your head being turned to him again, this time for him to kiss you for the second time. He hugged your frame with so much care that you could’ve even break into his arms as well, because he would have stick together all your pieces, all of your parts. It was hard to attach by someone when you knew very well that you both get hurt in the end.

But what if this wasn’t your end?  


It’s here! This is the last part of „Why Now?” imagine. I really hope you’ll like it, I already like to write stuff like this for you. What do you think about it? ’Hope it’s not too sad or something, usually I can handle to write sad stuff, I like it. Thank you so much for your reblogs and hearts, it really means a lot to me! And if you ever want to talk don’t hesitate to give me a message. Or ask me a question. Both are okay. Thank you for reading!

,,Tu nu vezi că e o ciudată? De ce o iubeşti?”


O iubesc pentru că e unică, nu e ciudată. E diferită. E fericită. E iubită. Iubeşte. E ea însăşi şi pentru mine e mai mult decât de ajuns. Dacă priveşti din exterior e uşor să spui că e o ciudată care face totul pentru a atrage atenţia, dar spre deosebire de cele ,,normale” ea nu se supune trend-urilor, nu face ceva pentru că aşa spun ceilalţi că trebuie să facă, ea face ce simte, cum simte, când simte. Voi o vedeţi ca fiind o făptură slabă, incapabilă să facă faţă vieţii de una singură doar pentru că plânge des, aşa-i? Ei bine, ea plânge pentru că e un suflet sensibil şi profund care percepe viaţa la superlativ, în timp ce voi sunteţi superficiali. Uneori se enervează aparent din nimic, dar asta numai pentru că are nevoie de afecţiune, cere iubire, deşi e respingătoare. Vrea să îi ţină departe pe cei care nu vor cu adevărat să îi fie alături. E ea însăşi, încearcă să fie imună la ceea ce credeţi despre ea şi nu vă dă importanţă, deşi o afectează ce spuneţi. Însă nu vrea să se schimbe. Sufletele sincere rămân sincere pentru totdeauna, deşi sunt condamnate adesea pe nedrept de teatralism.

Până la urmă nu înţeleg de ce vă pasă de ce o iubesc. Voi o urâţi pentru că e diferită. Eu o iubesc pentru că nu e la fel ca ceilalţi, nu face parte din turmă. Aveţi impresia că aţi alungat-o din grup şi că vrea să se întoarcă. Vă înşelaţi. A plecat singură şi de fapt voi sunteţi cei care vor să o aducă înapoi.

Nu sunteţi capabili decât să îi vedeţi acţiunile, eu le înţeleg şi intriga şi scopul. Încă îşi caută calea în viaţă, încă se descoperă şi redescoperă pe ea însăşi, dar nu aveţi cum să ştiţi atât timp cât vă opriţi la eticheta de ,,ciudat” aplicată unui om frumos care se bucură de viaţă şi iubire.

—  Cosmin (Lost-in-smoke.tumblr.com)
Înainte să plec o să vă arăt tuturor ce caracter prost am. Nu-mi pasă de niciunul dintre voi, da’ mi-a păsat, asta fiind cel mai prost lucru pe care l-am făcut.
Stii, uneori obosesti si, te saturi sa fie zilnic la fel!
Mereu minti ca esti bine, toti te cred si, nimeni nu isi da seama ca, tu de fapt, nu esti deloc bine.
Te saturi sa te trezesti in fiecare dimineata cu lacrimi in ochi (la fel cum te-ai culcat) si sa stii ca asta o sa fie o zi urata la fel ca toate celelalte.
Cand ajungi acasa, trebuie sa le arunci un zambet fals parintilor ca ei sa creada ca ai avut o zi buna.
Te plimbi doar prin intuneric pentru a-ti ascunde lacrimile…
Pierzi si persoana aia care iti spunea : ,,sunt aici pentru tine, de acum, suntem impreuna, nu te voi lasa niciodata" si.. poate ca reusesti sa uiti acea persoana dar aceste cuvinte, nu poti sa le uiti niciodata… iti amintesti mereu de ele si, naiv fiind, crezi in ele si a doua oara.
Seara, nici nu te mai culci, stai cu castile in urechi, intr-un colt al camerei, ca un copil singur, nu poti sa adormi din cauza gandurilor galagioase care iti urla in cap.
In fiecare zi, lasi lacrimile reci sa iti inunde fata si ochii aia frumosi….
Uneori, te doare atat de tare sufletul incat crezi ca te vei rupe in doua si, iti vine sa urli de durere.
Te uiti in oglinda si, te intrebi cine e persoana pe care o vezi, iti dai seama ca esti tu si.. izbucnesti in lacrimi.
Din ce in ce mai des, lasi lama sa iti umple mana de sange dar, nu ajuta, durerea din suflet e mai mare decat orice rana pe care ti-o faci…
Vine un moment cand obosesti, te saturi sa lupti si, oricat de puternic erai inainte… acum NU mai poti, pur si simplu nu mai poti si, oricat de mult ai vrea sa fii cum erai inainte, nu reusesti..
Întotdeauna când iubim, concepem dragostea ca fiind singura sursă de fericire şi fiind eternă, iar persoana iubită fiind iubitul etern. Sunt frecvente expresiile “te iubesc până la moarte”, “te voi iubi mereu”… Dar trecerea timpului aduce cu sine o formă de cunoaştere care ne demonstrează că cele afirmate şi crezute odată cu tărie se spulberă încet - încet în vreme. Apare o altă “dragoste eternă”, un alt “iubit veşnic”. Iubirea rămâne aceeaşi, iubirile se schimbă. Moarte şi înviere. Şi din nou moarte.
—  Mircea Eliade
Cand te-am intalnit, aveai ceva special si nu imi puteam da seama ce… 
De fiecare data cand vorbeam cu tine, ma calmam, eram mult mai linistita, eu fiind o persoana extraordinar de agitata si, recunosc, sunt foarte plangacioasa…uneori plang si fara motiv…
Dar jur ca de cand te-am intalnit pe tine nu mai plang atat de des… 
Dar, usor usor, mi-am dat seama ca nu aveai ceva special de care aveam nevoie… Acel ceva erai chiar tu…

Ultima lacrimă se revarsă.
Ultima bătaie a inimii o strigă lasciv de tare pe cea cu coasă.
Ultima speranță în suflet o apasă.

Și-a întins trupul pe patul șubrezit, după care a continuat să privească tavanul, într-un mod nestingherit.

Duhnea a iubire.
Duhnea a dor.
Duhnea a el și puțin amor.

Singurătatea o îmbrățișa frenetic de puternic în fiecare seară.
Ar fi voit să îl simtă lângă ea în călimară.

A oftat profund și dureros.
Suferința îi pulsa adânc în fiecare os.

Și-a îndreptat privirea spre fereastra tristă.
Simțind cum întreaga ființă se revărsă într-o risipă.

Ar fi voit să îi sărute ale lui buze moi.
Ar fi voit să privească luna amândoi.
Ar fi voit să îl sufoce în ale ei brațe.
Ar fi voit să îi rostească dulci șoapte.
Ar fi voit să adoarmă cu capul pe al lui piept.
Ar fi voit să mai audă un “ mereu te aștept.”

Visa cu ochii deschiși.
Agonici și de durere stinși.

Îl adora atât de mult.
Ar fi voit să audă de la el un “te ascult”.

O lacrimă i s-a prelins pe obrajii de porțelan.
Îl iubea atât de mult și nu doar de un an.

În stomac fluturii fără milă o bruscau.
Cucuvelele întunecate pe pervazul geamului, doine îi cântau.

Boceau și ele.
Fiind crispate de a ei durere.

Luna s-a apropiat de a ei fereastră îndeosebi de mult.
A început să îi sărute palid și rece, al ei trup.

Cerul suspina și el prin trăsnete.
Norii întunecați și reci,credeau că i se făcuse farmece.

Copila, a mai oftat încă o dată.
Avea inima atât de pură și curată.
Și-a cuprins trupul înfrigurat.
De durere și delir, mâncat.

Duhnea a iubire.
Duhnea a dor.
Duhnea a el și puțin amor.

Absența lui o sufoca fără vreo temere.
Copila, iubea atât de mult și se transforma în muiere.

Îi lipseau ochii lui triști și întunecați.
De dureri și patimi, brazdați.
Îi lipsea a lui prezență.
Tot ce mai putea acum admira, era doar o întunecată absență.
Îi lipsea al lui zâmbet otrăvitor de minunat.
Îi lipsea al lui chip atât de crispat.
Îi lipsea a lui voce puternic de frumoasă.
Îi lipsea a lui îmbrățișare ce îi fusese demult o casă.

Duhnea a iubire.
Duhnea a dor.
Duhnea a el și puțin amor.

Trupul îi era tot mai stors de puteri.
Cuprins de gânduri și atâtea temeri.
Liniștea în cameră s-a așezat impunător.
Chiar și până în gât a simțit al lui dor.

Cucuvelele jeleau și mai tare ?
Ea, respira tot mai greu, ce are ?

S-a ridicat și-a luat o înghițitură de apă.
Apoi s-a întins în pat, detașată.

Aștepta timpul să treacă.
Aștepta ca el să se întoarcă.
Aștepta să ajungă la sfârșitul vieții.
Să mai găsească liniște în razele dimineții.
Aștepta ultima răsuflare.
Căci în urma ei știa că nimic nu mai doare.

Stelele plângeau și destinu-l implorau prin gând .
Să îl mai întoarcă din al plecării drum.
Universul plângea nemuritor.
Fiind șocat de al muierii dor.

Duhnea a iubire.
Duhnea a dor.
Duhnea a el și puțin amor.

Oare avea să mai revină?
La a lui copilă?
Oare avea să mai rămâie?
Alături de iubirea lui cea dintâie?
Oare avea să o mai strângă la piept ?
Oare avea să îi mai rostească un “ veșnic te aștept” ?
Oare avea să o mai sărute?
Delicat și dulce pe a ei îngustă frunte ?

Iubire,ştii..

Știu că am făcut și eu greșeli. Știu că am spus cuvinte grele la nervi. Dar crede-mă că nimic nu a fost cu intenție, cu intenția de a te face pe tine să te simți rău. Ești cel mai minunat om de pe Pământ pentru mine. Mi-ai făcut atât de mult bine. Mi-ai ridicat încrederea în sine. Mi-ai readus și menținut zâmbetul pe buze. M-ai făcut cea mai fericită și iubită fată din lume. Și continui să faci toate acestea. 
Îmi pare rău. Îmi pare rău pentru tot. Pentru cuvintele spuse în trecut, pentru fiecare greșeală. Îmi pare rău și pentru că mă supăr când ieși cu băieții. Știu că poate n-o să îmi înțelegi motivul, dar mi-e frică.. Nu vreau ca ei să devină mai importanți decât mine. Știu, crede-mă că știu că ei nu sunt plictisitori ca mine. Eu, la aproape 16 ani, tot ce fac este să stau în casă. Sunt atât de geloasă pe ei, că ei te văd zilnic, iar eu nu(din cauza situației de acasă)… Dar și momentele în care te văd, puține fiind, le prețuiesc. Sunt singurele momente în care pot să fiu eu cu adevărat. Sunt cele mai frumoase momente pentru mine, și știu că și tu știi asta. 
Știi ce îmi doresc? De fapt știi, asta este dorința amândurora, dar haide să ți-o amintesc. Îmi doresc să avem copiii noștri, propria noastră familie, pentru care să dăm tot ce avem în putere pentru a fi fericită și frumoasă. Îmi doresc să avem propria noastră casă plină de iubire, în care să îmbătrânim împreună cu zâmbetele pe buze. O să se îndeplinească, dar doar dacă noi continuăm să ne iubim, să luptăm unul pentru altul și să nu băgăm de seamă gura lumii. Știu că nu o să ajungi să citești asta vreodată, de aceea în seara aceasta am de gând să îți spun, din nou, cât de mult te iubesc, cât de mult însemni pentru mine, că ești cea mai minunată persoană pe care am întâlnit-o și că meriți tot ce-i mai bun. 
Vă dau un sfat vouă, celor ce ați citit aceste rânduri: dacă aveți o persoană pentru care simțiți ceva, spune-ți-i fără ezitare, nici nu aveți idee ce ați putea pierde dacă nu faceți chestia asta. Nimic nu e mai frumos în lume decât să știi că persoana pe care o iubești te iubește și ea, așa că vă îndemn să iubiți și să vă lăsați iubiți, și niciodată să nu ascundeți ceea ce simțiți pentru o persoană. Este cea mai mare greșeală pe care ați putea-o face.