fight-cancer

The Signs In a Fight

Throwing Hands: Leo, Aries, Capricorn
Getting they Ass beat: Gemini, Libra
Breaking it up: Pisces, Aquarius
Pulling their phone out: Cancer, Scorpio, Virgo
Minding they business: Sagittarius, Taurus

My Favorite Things About The Signs and Anger

Aries’s confrontational attitude and how when something bothers them you know damn well they’re gonna say it.
Taurus’s immediate roast and then walking off as the other person is stunned as shit
Gemini’s being overly direct and letting you know exactly how they feel about whatever you did.
Cancer’s telling everyone what happened with comedic jokes and exaggerations, making it fucking hilarious.
Leo’s ability to make it a huuuuge deal, even if it’s small. (I love watching those go down tbh)
Virgo’s ability to roast to others but let shit go.
Libra’s ability to just tell them they didn’t like what they did and then try to fix it, and if they can’t come to a compromise they let them go.
Scorpio’s ability to fuck someone’s life up.
Sagittarius’s no-boundaries way of speaking, taking Aries’s confrontation to whole new levels.
Capricorn’s revenge and x2 modifier on whatever someone does to them.
Aquarius’s ability to stay neutral, but when someone gets on their nerves or starts shit big time, they reveal every nitty gritty detail they know about them and destroy them.
Pisces’s ability to make the other person confused and think about what they have done and advert the attention to what they’ve done back to the other person.

*Check Mars, too.

how to win a fight sign by sign

how to win a fight sign by sign:

♈️aries: compliment their fighting style. “wow you really know how to fight.” aries will be flattered and immediately forget the fight.

♉️taurus: you can’t, unless taurus isn’t really angry with you.

♊️gemini: multitask. keep looking at your phone. “sorry just gotta write this email.” gemini will also get on their phone and forget to argue.

♋️cancer: get their mom on your side.

♌️leo: pretend to give in but secretly don’t. if they notice, pretend it’s not intentional.

♍️virgo: get literally anyone else to agree with you. virgo self doubt will immediately take over and you will win.

♎️libra: insult them personally. say they’re ugly when they’re mad. you will never see them again.

♏️scorpio: keep asking them what their endgame is. they’ll have nothing to say because they don’t want to tell you.

♐️sagittarius: keeping saying “yeah but that’s just your opinion” because everything a sag says is.

♑️capricorn: just start crying. capricorns can’t so it’s like a special ability only you can activate.

♒️aquarius: keep talking about things aquarius doesn’t know anything about.

♓️pisces: pisces has a martyr complex so just reminding them that they’re not a faultless victim will confuse them.


I’m a queer, poc astrologer
email me at alice.lan.yang@gmail.com for a reading :)
alicesparklykat.com

advice to the signs from a scorpio
  • aries: you are not the world around you. the things that are happening to you do not define the person you are. chin up, be strong.
  • taurus: you get so worked up about everything, it's good to stop and breathe once in a while. smell the roses, watch the wind.
  • gemini: you don't have to pretend to be something you're not. the people that matter most will like you regardless of who you are.
  • cancer: let your emotions out. you feel so strongly, it is only hurting you to keep them to yourself,, which i know you do...
  • leo: the only advice i have for you is to know that the way you treat others can either make or break them. you are very influential and that is a gift. use it wisely.
  • virgo: stop expecting things out of people that they aren't giving you that you think you deserve.
  • libra: not everyone has to like you, you are special enough to know that others don't matter. stop letting them effect you so much.
  • scorpio: you're going to be okay, you just need to get all of the facts of a situation before you react because all of your choices, no matter how small, greatly affect your life.
  • saggitarius: it's not okay to play both sides of a situation. you are more manipulative and secretive than any scorpio, and it's not okay to treat people the way you do sometimes. you need to realize when you're hurting and not helping.
  • capricorn: you have to stop getting so worked up and angry at everything. take a second to listen to what others are saying to you before making yourself all upset. you're good.
  • aquarius: you need to open up more. you are so full of light and knowledge that keeping yourself locked away in the quiet is keeping the world from being so much better.
  • pisces: understand that not everyone is going to be helpful on your journey in life. forgiveness is so easy for you, you just really need to realize when people don't deserve it.
The Signs Started a Fight Club.
  • "Welcome to Fight Club, please don't tell my mom about this": Aries, Cancer, Libra, Sagittarius
  • "THAT JACKASS JUST HIT ME, WHY'D HE HAVE TO DO THAT?": Aquarius, Scorpio, Gemini, Virgo
  • "For an Alcoholics Anonymous meeting everybody's a little feisty": Capricorn, Pisces, Taurus, Leo
what anime character you should fight

aries- eren jaeger

taurus- oikawa tooru

gemini- all of them

cancer- kaneki ken

leo- izaya orihara

virgo- light yagami

libra- rin okumura

scorpio- sasuke uchiha

sagittarius- ciel phantomhive

capricorn- kirito

aquarius- black star

pisces- honey senpai

the signs as a rad ass movie

Aries: Fight Club

Taurus: Across the Universe

Gemini: Mean Girls

Cancer: Donnie Darko

Leo: Divergent

Virgo: (500) Days of Summer

Libra: The Virgin Suicides

Scorpio: Silver Linings Playbook

Sagittarius: Pulp Fiction

Capricorn: Charlie Bartlett

Aquarius: Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind

Pisces: The Perks of Being a Wallflower