It is so easy to starve yourself
in the same way she starved you of love.
It is so easy to withhold nourishment from your body
in the way she withheld nourishment from your soul.
because that feeling of emptiness, of nothing inside
you have ever known
and so to feel full is so frightening, so unfamiliar
and apparently you are undeserving of that sensation
for how else can you defend her deprivation?
How else can you explain the fact
that the same woman who brought you into the world
the same woman who was your world
is the same woman who brought it crashing down around you?
How else can you explain that
if not by diminishing your own worth?
what I wish you would realize
what I wish you would open your eyes wide enough to see
is that none of
is your fault
but rather hers,
rather due to her own inability to peer beyond her own demons
and see the angel that you are.
Darling, this is not your war
and your body is not a battlefield
nor are calories a crime.
Self-starvation is not your salvation
for it only continues the cycle she set
The only one who can save you now
and the only way out is to eat,
to fight through each tearful bite and merciless meal
to fight back against the urges and her voice shouting in your head,
to feed yourself and fight this sickness,
not the other way around.
Stop punishing your beautiful self for the cruelties she committed -
the soul that should be serving time is hers and hers alone.
Darling, you are so much more
than the unmothered child
the unwanted daughter.
If you want to define yourself as un-anything,
be unbound, unleashed and uninhibited -
be more than the perfect puppet she wanted you to be.
Somewhere beneath the lies she laid upon you
and the criticisms and insults she said make up who you are,
somewhere beneath it all is YOU.
There is an innocent little girl and a powerful young woman
waiting to be released.
So darling, take a breath and unchain her,
darling, set yourself free once and for all.
Stop waiting for her to give a love she is incapable of ever giving
and learn to love
This is a two-headed albino milksnake [x]. Each head has a brain and able to control over the shared body, causing difficulty in movement. Luckily, they shared the same stomach, snakes with separate stomachs will often fight and bite each other over the prey if one head has prey in its mouth.
In the wild, two-headed snake lifespan may be restricted significantly for they cannot escape predators well but despite this, two-headed snakes can lived up to 20 years in captivity.
Ayyyy what is up my dudeS??? I’m back with another installment to the NCT Call Boy Series!!! This time, I’m back with my number two main man, Taeil!! Listen, I think our old man needs more love and more smut literature because I crave that damn shit like a cocaine addict with crack lmao Anyway, hope you enjoy this one!!!!
P.S. LISTEN I THINK PEOPLE DON’T REALIZE HOW KINKY HE PROBABLY IS LIKE??? HIS FAV ARTIST IS TREY SONGZ????????? WHAT MORE NEEDS TO BE SAID????????
You’re thumb stopped on the green call button, body shaking as you willed yourself to just press it. Part of you thought it was a good idea, the other half screamed for you to forget about it all entirely and just cry in your bed alone again.
It had been a few weeks since your long time boyfriend of over three years broke up with you. But that wasn’t even the worst part, he broke up with you, even though you should have broken up with him. You had caught him cheating a month or so ago, heart crushed into the dirt when you saw the way he moaned and bit his lip in ecstasy, while some unknown girl did things to him only you thought you could. When you told him what you saw, he had looked like a man staring death in the face, tears spilling down his cheeks as he explained that it was because he was drunk and didn’t realize how much he had drank, that he would never think about doing it ever again.
Because he loved you more than anything.
But it happened again, then again, and again, until finally, having realized you weren’t worth much to him anymore, he dropped you completely. He broke up with you in the nastiest way possible, saying that he fucked all those girls because he couldn’t stand the thought of banging you again.
He left you in a crumpled heap of tears in your own apartment, which smelled like him, alone to wallow in your self pity and sadness. That had been over two weeks ago, and the tears had faded, leaving only anger and bitterness. You weren’t low enough to get back at him, no, at this point he wasn’t even worth your time, let alone another thought. Your body craved for touch though, to be loved in a way that you realized your boyfriend had never actually had.
It was a bad idea.
But you were so, so desperate as you lay in a quivering mess on the hotel bed, heart aching as you finally pressed the call button. You read the hastily scrawled number of the sticky note you had written on, eyes tracing the name still branded on the backs of your eyelids when you looked away: Taeil.
You thought no one would pick up, the dial tone seemed to last for hours, but eventually a calm voice answered the phone, “Hello?”
“H-Hello,” you managed through your trembling lips, fingers tightening on bed spread. “I’d like to make an order.” You did as the advertisement in the mature magazine had instructed, feeling silly and stupid as those words struggled to escape your mouth.
“And who is it you wish to deliver?,” the unknown voice asked, emotionless and businesslike.
You shakily exhaled the name, “T-Taeil, please.” There was no doing back now, you’d just either dug your own grave or gave yourself the best early birthday present of your life.
“Ah, you’re lucky he’s free tonight and not very busy,” the voice sighed, “And the address, ma'am?”
You gave the name of the hotel you were staying at, and even your room number, placing all cards down on the table as you prayed that a serial killer wasn’t going to show up at your door.
“Right,” the nameless voice confirmed your address with you, “It should be about an hour, is that quite alright?”
“Oh, y-yes!,” you stuttered, snapping out of your horrid daydreams. “Thank you!”
No, ‘your welcome’, only the rhythmic beeping of your phone as the voice hung up without a word, leaving you once again in silence. The only other sound in the room, was the pattering of rain drops down the big glass window of the hotel room. Maybe he would get lost and you could just spend the night in this nice hotel room to try and forget your troubles. You closed your eyes for a moment, letting the rain lull you into a trance, your eyes snapping open as you felt the weight of your phone still in your hand.
You sat up quickly, pressing a hand to your mouth as you read the list of recent calls and saw the unknown number at the very top. You had just called for a call boy.
You had just called for a call boy. You shrieked and threw your phone against the mattress, flailing as you slammed your head into a pillow, burying your face as far in as it would go before releasing a blood curdling scream. You can’t believe you did that, and for what? A good fuck because you haven’t had one in weeks? You literally couldn’t believe what a sad sight you must have looked at that moment. You definitely were not dressed like a (hopefully) hot guy was about to show up at your hotel room and bang you. You sat up, hair disheveled and lips pouting as you caught sight of your appearance in a mirror.
You wore a baggy sweater to fight the biting cold of winter, a semi-cute skirt with black tights that might have passed for presentable, had you not topped off the look with your worn white high tops. You snorted at yourself and kicked off the shoes, throwing them somewhere in the spacious room. Even if you looked like trash, the guy was still obliged to fuck you, so long as you paid what was owed.
And boy, was this guy expensive.
You didn’t realize what a pretty penny he would cost you, but at this point you had little to lose, so why not go out with a bang? Literally. You knew you would kick yourself later for this, but for right now, all you knew was that you were getting increasingly aroused and bitter, a little impatient too. You weren’t sure you could wait a whole hour for this guy to show up, so you did what you could to distract yourself.
You thought about maybe touching yourself, but then that would defeat the purpose of the call boy. So instead, you opted to sip some hot tea and browse social media, two things you did outrageously well. The minutes slipped by with the aid of your phone, and you nearly jumped out of your skin when you heard three short raps on the door.
You first panicked, shoving your entire mug of unfinished tea into one of the trash cans, then proceeded to dump your phone on the desk as you inspected yourself once over in the mirror. In a last ditch effort, you put on chapstick and wiped underneath your eyes with a tissue to clean up your makeup, screaming internally as you walked over to the door and opened it breathlessly.
No singular adjective could properly describe the god that stood in the dimply lit hallway of the hotel, his eyes opening in surprise for a split second as he gave you a once over. He had a jawline that would probably butcher you if you touched it, soft, warm brown eyes, and a sinful tongue that darted out to casually lick his bottom lip. Your body was already reacting and you had only just looked at him for a solid minute.
“This should be fun,” he murmured, eyeing you like a predator.
You backed up into the room as he stepped through the doorway, confused, “What?” You watched as he casually shed his coat, the movement fluid as you still recovered from the fact that his voice sounded like milk and honey.
“Baby girl,” he began, popping open a few buttons on his shirt, “Anyone with a nose and a brain can tell that you’ve been thinking about a thing or two.” He barely spared you another glance, nodding down at your skirt as he undid a few more buttons, exposing his lean chest.
You blushed, trying to sniff the air inconspicuously as you tugged down on your skirt, “Oh, n-no that’s not-” You stopped yourself, sighing as you decided to plop yourself on the bed, admiring the call boy without a care in the world now.
“You have a name, sweetheart?,” he asked, finally meeting your eyes and catching you eyeing him with a smirk.
“_______,” you murmured, feeling a flare of arousal in your stomach as you realized how wet you really were. You thought of how long it had been since someone touched you, since you’ve been kissed. You craved that now more than ever, here was a beautiful man, willing to please you so long as you paid.
“Cute,” he smiled, walking over and letting his fingers run through your hair where you sat on the bed. You had to crane your neck back to look up at him, as he spoke again, “You can call me Taeil, or something else if you really wanted to. Daddy, master, doesn’t matter to me, it’s what you want, right?” He smirked down at you seeing the way your eyes widened at his suggestions.
“I like Taeil,” you said, chewing on your bottom lip.
He chuckled, pushing you back into the mattress as he crawled on top and caged you in with his arms, “I bet you do. Don’t be afraid to say whatever later, you might find you like having a daddy, or a master.”
You squirmed beneath him as he took your chin in his hand, forcing you to look him in the eye, “Got it?”
You nodded, lips parting as he leaned in, capturing your mouth in a deep kiss as your body already ached for him to press himself onto you. You wanted the satisfying weight of him on top of you, your thighs rubbing together eagerly as he kissed you like no one else.
You parted your lips and he hummed in approval, causing a flare of pride to spark in your belly as he slid his tongue in. He tasted of dark chocolate, like he’d just ate an entire bag before coming here, and you didn’t mind at all. In fact, your kisses increased, tongue fighting to enter his mouth as he pulled away with a chuckle, “A little eager there, aren’t we?” A shining bridge of saliva stretched between the two of you, causing your eyes to darken.
Knowing you’d probably never see him again, you might as well be honest, so you gasped, chest heaving, “You taste so good.”
His soft brown eyes darkened, finally sinking down to press his chest against yours, “Oh, yeah?” He shifted until one of his knees was pressed between your thighs, causing your skirt to ride up around your hips.
You bit your lip and nodded, seeing the way he smirked and nosed his way down towards your neck caused your skin to flush. Taeil pressed several wet kisses to the skin there, trailing his tongue up before he reached your ear, his breath hot and full of unadulterated desire. “Poor baby girl,” he simpered, hand moving from the bed sheets to your thigh as he squeezed it, “You want it so bad you’ll say just about anything, am I right?”
You felt daring in your lust, so you grabbed the hand that was creeping along and massaging your inner thigh, pressing it to the wetness that soaked through your tights. He looked down at you in surprise for a moment before grinning as you traced a finger along his knife sharp jaw, turning his face towards you, whispering, “I don’t have to say anything.” Taeil chuckled, his free hand stroking your hair surprisingly gently as he looked down at you, “You know what, ______? I like you a lot,” he started to move his fingers against your core, already feeling how wet you were for him. “So that’s why I’m not going to fuck you as a customer, but because I really want to fuck you.”
You moaned and moved your hips in accordance with his strokes, your fingers already coming up to tangle in his soft brown hair. You felt another leap of pride, thinking that it had been far too long since someone actually wanted you. This night was going to turn out far better than you had initially planned.
Taeil was completely surprised to say the least, but he wasn’t showing it as he watched you squirm beneath him as he worked a hole into your tights. The moment you opened the door with your wide eyes and parted lips, he could already feel his cock twitch, wanting nothing more than to ruin you tonight. You looked like such a submissive girl though, he thought it would turn out like every other appointment, but you surprised him. You shocked him with your forwardness, your eagerness and the unashamed way you simply wanted him to fuck you senseless. You knew what you wanted and right now he certainly did too.
You heard the thin fabric of your tights tear as Taeil finally managed to make a large enough hole in order to reach your core. He was pleasantly surprised to find you weren’t wearing panties, raising his eyebrows at you in question, all you could do was blush and look away. Taeil felt his heart throb for a second in his chest, but he mentally shook himself and slid the tip of his finger from bottom to the top of your slit, collecting all your essence.
You shivered as he took things slow, stroking your core with slender fingers and kissing your collarbones sensually as you arched up from the bed. Your sweater untucked from your skirt and exposed your stomach, giving Taeil the opportunity to suck on the skin there as he reached for the zipper on the side of your skirt.
Taeil smiled against your skin, feeling how you quivered underneath him when he slid in a single digit, marveling at just how tight you were. You probably hadn’t had a good fuck in weeks, he thought to himself pensively as he watched your pretty eyes flutter close at the pleasure. He decided then and there he was going to make your night, make you feel good and give you what you deserved. He normally didn’t let his feelings get in the way of his work, but the experienced call boy couldn’t help but want to help you. You didn’t seem like the type of girl who would call for him, or do this sort of thing, so something must have happened. Whatever was obviously troubling you, Taeil made it his goal to make you forget, to only feel and see him for tonight.
You gasped his name as he added another finger, “Taeil!” The name sounded foreign on your tongue, but the two syllables tasted so good in your mouth you wanted to chant it like a mantra.
“You like that, baby girl?,” he murmured against your hips where he had been nibbling. “Do you want some more?”
You nodded rapidly, hair getting moussed by the bed sheets as you covered your mouth with a hand, trying to quiet your moans. The call boy grasped your wrist, pinning it down into the bed, “I don’t think so, I want to hear you tonight.” He leaned in and let his tongue drag from your collarbones to your jaw, voice dropping an octave, “I want everyone to hear how good I’m making you feel, how goddamn well I’m fucking you, okay?”
Your breath caught in your throat as he slid your sweater above your head, removing your ruined tights and skirt as well as he pulled you to the edge of the bed. He stood up and unbottoned his shirt, allowing you to drink in the sight of his tan skin while your legs dangled down the sides of the mattress. He kneeled in front of you, parting your thighs with commanding hands and hooking them over his shoulders as he kissed dangerously close to your soaking heat.
“You’re so wet for me right now,” he murmured with a smirk against your thigh. “That you’re practically dripping.” He emphasized his words by placing a single kiss on your lower lips, causing your thighs to jolt.
Taeil held onto your hips fast, pressing you down into the mattress as he gave you one last smirk before he slowly dragged his tongue from bottom to top. You grabbed the bed sheets in a death grip, head thrown back as he sucked on your labia, teeth tugging at it briefly before he considered your clit. He flicked his tongue over your sensitive bundle of nerves, gentle at first, teasing you and giving you little shocks of pleasure as he began to increase the pressure. He finally attacked it with his mouth, sucking on your clit like his life depended on it.
The only thing you could do was curl your toes and moan, moan his name like it was the only thing keeping you grounded to this earth. His hands on your hips slid underneath and grabbed at your ass, squeezing it so hard you’re sure there would be a bruise. This caused you to lift your hips into his mouth, where his tongue was working tirelessly against your folds to taste and drink in all of your essence. You reached down with one hand and knitted your fingers into his hair, causing him to groan into your core as he brought you closer to his mouth.
You bit your lip, but couldn’t help the words that poured forth, “Fuck that’s so good, please, please, please, please.” Your felt the familiar and long missed knotting in your stomach that signaled your release was near, never having felt it this intensely before.
Taeil could tell by the way you were babbling that you were close, so he toyed with you a bit, pulling away and licking his lips as he regarded your disheveled state. Your bra straps had slipped off your shoulder, there were tears in your eyes, and your ankles were locked together on his back to try and bring him closer. You looked like you’d already been fucked, but he wasn’t even close to being done with you yet.
Taeil pressed a singular kiss to your clit, tongue cleaning his mouth of your juices, “Please what, baby girl?”
“Please let me come,” you whimpered, seeing the way he smiled at your desperation and want of him.
He didn’t reply, but tugged your hips closer to his face again, mouth already busy on your folds as he began to thrust his tongue in and out of your opening. He allowed you to buck into his mouth, hips quick as they fucked into his tongue, feeling how it wetly slid inside of your walls. His nose brushed your clit just right and soon enough, hips bucking wildly into his mouth, you came with a scream. A strange feeling bubbled up through your release, and suddenly, you were squirting and making a mess of the bed sheets. Your hips didn’t stop and neither did his tongue as he continued to fuck you with his tongue and let you ride out you high.
Taeil felt himself grow hard at the raw feeling of your hips snapping into his mouth, the taste of your release and the way you looked so shocked to see that you had squirted everywhere. He felt it spill down his chin and soak the sheets, and his dick twitched knowing that he had been the one to make you release like that.
Your body trembled, thighs quaking as you finally came down, face already red as you realized what had just happened. Through your lust, you felt the creeping of embarrassment tug at your throat, but Taeil didn’t seem to mind. The call boy looked ready to fuck you right then and there, what with the way he licked up your juices from his lips and savored them.
He climbed on top of you, mouth already meeting yours so that you could taste yourself, “God, that was so fucking hot, baby girl.”
You flushed with pride, Taeil genuinely seeming like he was impressed and turned on as he slid his shirt from his shoulders. The single lamp that barely illuminated the room made him look ethereal, the tan of his skin had a golden glow as he kissed your forehead chastely. You reached for his belt, wanting nothing more than to return the favor but he gently pushed your hands away.
“Tonight’s about you,” he smiled, urging you to crawl further up the bed until you rested against the headboard. His hands never stopped on his pants, sliding them down his muscular thighs as he was left only in his briefs. You licked your lips seeing the familiar outline pressing against the fabric, still eager to please him.
“I still want to though,” you murmured, looking him straight in the eye, urging him to let you touch him.
The call boy yielded, allowing you to push him down into the mattress and settle between his legs. You inched his briefs down his thighs, having him lift his hips in order to remove the last piece of fabric that separated you from him. You realized your bra was still on, so you unclasped it quickly and tossed it carelessly over his head, having it land somewhere on the floor. You took in the sight of his lean body, lithe muscles that rippled underneath bronze skin and eyes that watched you intently as you decided what to do first.
You wanted to cover every inch of him with your tongue, to see if his skin tasted as good as his mouth. But you also wanted to give him immediate pleasure, to take him down your throat and taste another part of him. He was like an all you could eat buffet just waiting for you to make the first move, and Taeil loved the look of thoughtfulness on your face as you contemplated your options.
He spoke up, pulling you from your thoughts, a smirk on his face, “Not sure where to start?”
You blushed, sliding up to press a kiss to his lips, “I just want to make you feel good.”
Taeil smiled at you, tucking a piece of hair behind your ear, an uncharacteristically kind gesture for him to have with a client. His voice was gentle, “You already have, so do whatever comes to mind. I’m patient and we have all night, sweetheart.”
You nodded and inched back down, choosing to pay attention to his half hard member. You leaned down and placed a kiss at the tip, hearing him sigh in relief as you took the head of his cock into your mouth, sucking lightly. He weaved his fingers through your hair, not enough to hurt, but enough to take control if he wanted to. You slowly inched down his length with your mouth, testing your limits as you adjusted to the foreign girth of him. You hummed and let your tongue run over one of the prominent veins on the underside of his member, knowing it was there only by the touch of your wet muscle.
He groaned softly, “Just like that, baby girl. You’re doing so good.” He shifted his hips slightly, gagging you only for a second as he thrust up into your mouth gently.
You breathed heavily through your nose as you began to pick up speed, fingers wrapping around what you couldn’t fit in your mouth. Taeil released heavenly sounding moans, a musical sound that drove the new knot in your stomach insane. You wanted him to keep making those sounds, and you wanted to be the reason why. So you allowed him to fuck up into your mouth, blinking back the natural tears that formed in the corners of your eyes as you gagged around him. Relaxing your throat the best you could, you slid down him even deeper, causing his hips to stutter and his breath to catch.
You could tell he was close just by the way his fingers were tightening on your hair, and the way his eyes squeezed shut, his head rolling back at the closeness of it all. You thought he was going to come, and you would get to taste his release, but he pulled out of your mouth suddenly. The call boy’s chest was heaving as he tried to calm himself down and catch his breath.
Still gasping, he sat up and pushed you back into the bed aggressively, “Were you trying to make me come in your mouth, baby girl?”
He attacked you with his lips, sucking rough hickeys on your neck and nipping at your collarbones as you cried out from the pleasure pain. He didn’t allow you to answer, his lips swallowing your words and stealing your breath as he kissed you passionately. No one had ever kissed you like that before, it felt so real, so full.
Taeil pulled away, his eyes dark and a smirk in place on his lips, “The only place I’ll be coming is inside of you.”
You moaned at his words, already eager to finally feel him rubbing along your walls and stretching your core. Your thighs parted on their own accord as he positioned himself at your entrance, teasing the tip of his cock in and out of your folds. The call boy smiled down at you, seeing the way you looked like an absolute wreck for him, so ready and willing for him to fuck you senseless. He couldn’t remember a time ever wanting someone just as badly as they wanted him, and for some reason he welcomed the feeling.
You wrapped your legs around his waist, ankles hooking together at his lower back as he began to enter you. Your arms wrapped around his neck and brought his lips to yours once again as the perfect feeling of his cock buried deep inside of you sank in. Taeil let out one of the most satisfied groans to ever reach your ears, and it turned you on immensely to know you were the sole purpose of it.
“Fuck, baby girl,” he moaned, rocking into you slowly to feel your slickness on his cock.
You gasped, crying out at the way he stretched your walls perfectly, fitting inside you unlike any other cock before. Taeil gradually picked up the pace, wanting nothing more than to just fuck your brains out, he had to be patient with you, knowing that you hadn’t been with anyone for a while.
You thought the complete opposite, ignoring the pain, you urged him to just let go, “Taeil please…! Just fuck me, fuck me hard!” Tears nearly spilled down your cheeks, your body craving the roughness only he could give you. You were already drunk with pleasure and he had only just begun.
Hearing your words he almost thought to pay them no mind, but the desperation behind them caused his own brain to go haywire. All thoughts of carefulness and control slipped away, and only the primal desire to fuck the girl underneath him took over.
It was like a switch, one moment he was calculating with his thrusts, the next he was bucking into you like a wild animal. His hips snapped deep inside of you, causing you to cry out as his skin slapped against yours painfully. Unsatisfied with the angle he was hitting you at, the call boy wordless repositioned you without missing a beat, turning you on your side and throwing one of your legs over his shoulder. He hit you much deeper now, his cock reaching so far inside of you, it felt like he was fucking your solar plexus. The bed shook furiously as he drove into you relentlessly, eyes misted with lust and desire as you clenched and unclenched around him. Your body and mind were on cloud nine, everything fuzzy and raw as you only felt the boy above you.
You were ripped from your haze as Taeil spanked you harshly on the ass, his voice husky, “Is this what you wanted?”
You nodded with tears falling down your cheeks, crying out as he spanked you again, “Answer me.”
“Yes!,” you wailed, choking on a sob as he reached down and rubbed at your clit generously, eager to see you come.
“You gonna come for me, baby girl?,” he groaned, feeling you already tightening up around him. “Come all over my cock, sweetheart, make me feel good.”
And came you did, harder than you had in your entire life as a scream was ripped from your throat. Your thighs twitched madly and your eyes squeezed painfully shut, Taeil coming just minutes after you. His thrusts grew more crazed, more inhuman stopping with a groan as he shot his seed deep inside of you, “Oh, fuck.”
The two of you stayed joined together like that for a few minutes, Taeil leaning down to kiss your lips tirelessly as he attempted to soothe the angry red marks on your ass he had left with his hand. He slid out of you gingerly, lazily cleaning himself on his briefs that lay beside him on the bed and tossing them over his shoulder.
He collapsed down next to you, where tear trails were still evident on your cheeks, his eyes concerned, “I didn’t hurt you did I?”
“No!,” you quickly answered, turning toward him as he drew you into his arms. You bit your lip and blushed as you struggled to meet his gaze, “Honestly, everything was perfect and I really needed that.” You pecked his lips and pulled away, noting with a smile the way he chased your lips, “All of it.”
The call boy looked relieved, his personality suddenly gentler as he kissed your forehead, “I’m glad, because for a moment I wasn’t thinking and-”
You silenced him with another kiss, pulling barely enough away for your lips to move, “Like I said, I needed all of it.”
He smiled softly against your mouth, pulling away so that he could look at you with a face of confusion, “I have a question though, feel free to not answer. No offense, but you just don’t seem like the type of girl who’s into this kind of thing. Why then? What happened?”
Your heart sank, suddenly remembering it all, having truly forgotten everything for the time you had been with Taeil. You nuzzled deep into his chest, taking in the warm scent of his skin, “My boyfriend broke up with me because I caught him cheating one too many times. I was coward and never stood up to him, never let him know that what he did was wrong-,” your voice broke, tears spilling anew. “That it hurt me.”
Taeil held you and listened, anger and sadness flaring up inside of him. He wanted to say that this entire session was a mess because he kept letting his curiosity and emotions interfere, since he was known as a call boy who was notorious for having zero attachment during work. But you had triggered something inside of him that he had buried deep down ever since he had joined the sex industry. It had been too long since he just laid with someone like this, to just feel each other and hold one another in a nonsexual manner. You were this broken girl in his arms who he couldn’t help but find himself intrigued by and incredibly attracted to, hurt as you were, and he wanted to fix you. He wanted to take you out to his favorite coffee shop, listen to his favorite bands with you, hold hands and watch movies together, lay in bed and just talk about how your day had been.
“_______,” he murmured, brushing the hair from your face and tilting your chin up to look at him.
You met his eyes through your blurred vision, seeing something so tender in his gaze that your heart lurched and yearned for him to stay with you, to not leave for the night. Your wanted to hold him, and for him to wrap you up inside his arms, to hide you from the world.
“I know how much it can hurt,” he started, kissing a salty tear that rolled down your cheek. “But I also know that the only way to heal from something like that is to surround yourself with a better kind of love, to put yourself first, to find what makes you happy.”
His words really struck a chord in your heart, surprised that such kind words could spill from a sex worker’s lips. Taeil looked so comforting in that moment, the warmth of his body pressed against your own was a feeling you could get used to.
Your voice was tentative, quavering as you proposed something perhaps taboo to him, “Will you stay with me, just for tonight?”
The call boy leaned in and captured your lips, pulling away and resting his forehead against yours, “I’ll stay for the night.”
Taeil didn’t stop though, taking a chance, a leap of faith, he drew you closer to him, “And I’d like to stay for the next, and the next, and the next-”
You felt euphoric when you cut him off with another kiss, unable to help yourself as you let a small laugh leave your lips, tears of relief spilling down your cheeks. You don’t remember much after that, only the warm embrace of Taeil’s arms and the way he hummed softly until you were lulled to sleep.
You do remember though, waking up the next morning to find him still next to you, his arm thrown over your stomach as he pulled you close to his slide in his sleep. You remember clearly the peaceful look on his sleeping face. You remember it every time you wake up next to him in your bed, every morning the start of a new day spent with him. A new day to heal, to grow, and fall deeper in love with the call boy, now turned boyfriend, you had met on a whim.