fifty dollar notes

@ass-ass-in-treehole @to-break-the-stalemate

Since you weren’t in the chat have more Dad Starrick ModernAU

-Starrick bringing his children to work after much begging,crying, and clothes pulling. He leaves them in his office, with his secretary and their toys. He doesn’t count on the poor girl having to go to the bathroom, not without asking them to stay put. They don’t. Jacob hits Evie with his truck toy and she runs away crying to look for daddy Starrick, Jacob close behind.

The Frye twins get into the room where he’s having a meeting, and he lifts them and sits them on his lap and keeps talking as if there weren’t two seven year olds with sticky hands happily sipping their juice boxes, one of the still sniffing.

-Or perhaps they get lost and happen into Roth’s office, staying there with this weird funny man for a few hours. Roth sees how everyone else panics outside, Starrick mostly. He knows he should tell him they’re safe and here.

Instead he gives them a fifty dollar bank note and sends them on their way to the cafeteria.

-The Frye twins bday party. Chaos.

-Starrick spoiling his children. Buying them a swing set probably.

-Mrs. Disraeli being the loving neighbour and giving the twins cake and sweeties and laughing when Starrick asks her not to spoil them.

-The twins slidding down the stairways using the couch cushions, and making Starrick watch. Hell, they even make him take part. He gets a bruise on his cheek for falling.

-This happening when he gets home

Warren Worthington/Angel x Reader(fluff) "Soulmates"

“So what’s your one,Y/N?” Scott asked you.
“Sorry, I wasn’t listening. My what?”
“You soulmate scar” Jean said, linking her fingers with Scott’s.

You pulled up your sleeve and showed them your wrist.
“It’s um..its wings”

Suddenly, Peter’s head snapped up to look at Scott
“I knew it!” Peter exclaimed “I have to tell him, please let me tell him!”
“Wait what!?!?” You asked as Scott calmed Peter down.

“It’s Warren, your soulmate is Warren!” Peter shouted
“How do you know??”
“You’ve got wings, he’s got an Spades from a deck of cards. Cards are always associated with-”
“Probability ” you finished, looking down at you lap, eyes unfocused.

“Ha! Cough it up Summers!” Peter said as Scott handed him a fifty dollar note.
“You made a bet?” Jean asked
“Hell yeah we did”

“Guys, why are you up so late it’s 2AM” Warren said as he entered the room, sleep evident on his face as he scratched the back of his neck and flexed his wings
The group fell silent and you averted your eyes to the floor.

Kurt, who’d been pretty much completely silent until then suddenly opened his mouth to speak
“Y/N is your soulmate ” he blurted out as you whacked his arm before he could teleport away.

“What?” Warren asked, letting out a yawn as he squinted against the light.
“That true Y/N? What’s your scar?”

You gulped a little and showed him your wrist.
His eyes widened before he pulled his shirt up partly.

“Jeez warren,save it for later” Peter teased, earning a glare him his winged friend.

Warren’s scar was just below his abs, right on his hipbone.
You reached out and gently touched it.Sure enough, it was the sign of Spades.

“I get it now, you control probability ” he said, yanking his shirt back down and extending his hand out to you.
“Looks like we’ve got a lot to talk about”


Crème Fraîche

pairing: ginny x pansy park(inson)
coffeeshop college student AU 
word count: 856 words
written for: grumpymalfoy
notes: 10 points if you can spot the bring it on reference

When Ginny scheduled all her classes to be in the afternoons so that she could take on all the morning shifts at the campus café, she did not factor in having to deal with Daphne Greengrass.

Daphne waltzes in at eight-fucking-fifteen on the dot every single weekday, blonde hair perfectly coiffed and lips perfectly glossed and skin perfectly unblemished. Ginny will, instinctively, huddle down a little in her oversized apron and fight the urge to rub at her freckles before promptly disintegrating into self-loathing for feeling that way.

She’s Ginny-fucking-Weasley. She plays varsity touch rugby and she’s fabulous.

Daphne then proceeds to order the same drink, every time: a skinny, soy caramel macchiato with a double shot of espresso and extra whip (then why the actual fuck does she want it skinny?), and cute latte art.

For real.

It’s going to be covered by whipped cream anyways and Daphne Greengrass wants cute latte art. At eight-fucking-fifteen in the morning.

Ginny always smiles as brightly as she can without actually throwing up before proceeding to make a non-skinny soy caramel macchiato, single shot, and with only a burst more whip than usual. She leaves out the latte art.

And that’s how she earns $7.60 every morning, like clockwork.

At least, until Pansy Park starts coming in with Daphne. Then she earns $9.30 every morning, like clockwork, in addition to dealing with the cloud of resulting frustration that Pansy wafts in with her like a spritz of Gucci Guilty.

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Wedding Date (Sam Imagine)

Hi huney how about one where you take sam to a wedding as your ‘date’ but your secretly in love with him then you confess it to him and tell him the truth? THANK YOu

HEY GUYS! this is like extremely shit, but anyway, try to enjoy it?X


 “Hey!” You greeted your mother on the phone happily as you sat in the bunker living room, sunken in to the leather couch, snuggled up in a blanket.

-“Honey I’m just reminding you about the wedding tomorrow, bring a date you are down for plus one”-
“Ok mom, it’s at 2 o’clock, right?”
-“yes, but y/n I have to go. Be there for half one. Bye love you”- she hung up the phone promptly and you brought it down from your ear, squeezing it from annoyance at yourself for forgetting your cousins wedding.
“Damn it” you cursed as you thought about how the hell you were going to get a date within 16 hours. You couldn’t ask a civilian, no matter how charming you couldn’t ask a randomer on a date to a wedding. Castiel was very busy in heaven, plus far to awkward and socially weird. The big old crush you had on Sam would most likely increase if he was your fake boyfriend. So, Dean was your only valid option. You threw back your blanket and got up off the couch.
“Dean!” You called out, your voice bouncing off the walls as you walked into the library, only to meet Sam. You were caught off guard and you immediately started to blush. His hair falling out from behind his ears, his strong muscular shoulders pressed tight against his red, orange and white plaid shirt with his eyes locked on the book in front of him.
“Oh, hi” you giggled
“Dean’s in his bedroom” Sam said prying his eyes of the page and bringing them to you, with a slight smile.
“Ok thanks” you started to walk off but Sam stopped you
“But I wouldn’t go in. He’s not feeling the best, you don’t want to get sick, plus he’s kind of cranky when he is ill” Sam explained, he had a point. Trying to make Dean food, feed him medicine and just generally look after him was a nightmare when he was ill because he was grumpier than ever.
“Anything I could help you with?” He asked, being the polite man that he is.
“Well I was going to ask him to go to a wedding with me, but I guess I’ll have to find someone else”
“What about me?” Sam offered
“Well I didn’t think you’d want to go. I know Dean wouldn’t have but I could have bribed him with the open bar” you grinned as Sam let out a little chuckle.
“Yeah, I’d love to go. To tell you the truth I’m sick of researching these past few days”
“Yes! Thank you, Sam!” You shrugged a little as you smiled, skipping back to your room to get some sleep.
The next morning you woke up with a slight sense of regret among your excitement. You had to see Sam looking absolutely dashing, in a nice suit not a cheap one for his fbi alias (which, also made you weak in the knees), and you just knew it would take every muscle in your body not to jump on him.
You got out of bed at 11am and knocked on Sam’s bedroom door, he told you to come in. He was sitting on the bed with nothing but boxers, putting socks on.
“Uh… awkward” you mumbled as you opened the door.
“Sorry” he said realizing for the first time, he was half naked.
“Why are you putting your socks on before your suit?” You questioned, he just looked at you strangely, then continued.
“Uh, Sam what car are we taking? Impala or one from the garage?” You asked, you initially came to wake him up but that was already done, so you just wanted to stay with him for a little longer, no matter how pathetic that was.
“Just the impala” he answered standing up, his toned body straightening out as your eyes ran all over him, snapping out of it quickly before he noticed.
“Ok, an hour then we head?”
“Ok” he smiled, then you were about to walk out the door, until you remembered the text your mom had sent you.
“Oh pack a bag, we are staying over night. My mom booked us a room in the same hotel as the ceremony.” You informed him, he gave you his famous bitch face, probably because you didn’t tell him sooner about staying over.
“One hour” you repeated again then left to go get dressed. You didn’t have much clothes to wear, so you through on an elegant floral skirt, a white blouse with your favourite heels, along with a light pink coloured clutch. With some delicate jewelry, light make-up along with your red lips, even you had to admit you looked awesome.
You packed a bag with some more clothes in it and pyjamas, then you left, walking across the hall to Sam’s room, lightly knocking your fist against the wood.
He opened the door and as your eyes checked each other out both of your jaws dropped in sync.
“Wow, you look really handsome” you complimented the gorgeous hunter who was wearing a grey suit with a black tie.
“You look beautiful, y/n” he returned the compliment
“Thanks. We should go” you said, then started to walk down the hall, without your knowledge Sam checked you out as you headed down the corridor, his gaze burning on you.
You and Sam got into the impala, he informed you that he already called Garth to take care of Dean and hold down the fort whilst you two were gone.
You got out of the car, and you didn’t even have time to get a present, and only realised that when you saw people walking in with gift bags.
“Shit Sam we have no present” you looked at him, he reached into his pocket and pulled out a fifty dollar note.
“Good job I have a card. Gimme” you put your hand out, for the money, then went into the back seat where you had a plain card that could be used for any occasion. It had a single rose on it and that was the whole card. It was originally for Charlie’s birthday, but she could have another. You wrote the card (leaning on Sam’s back) and then you put the money inside and sealed it.
You put your hand out for Sam to hold, he laced his fingers with yours and you strolled into the hotel, checking into your room before anything else. You returned downstairs for some mall talk with relatives before the ceremony started. It was beautiful, you were happy for your cousin and her new husband, you couldn’t stop yourself from wishing it was you and Sam up there. The pair’s vows were heartfelt and almost brought you to tears.
You congratulated them later on and handed them the envelope, they done the whole ‘you shouldn’t have’ act but you knew they were secretly hoping it was a jackpot.
Suddenly your least favorite cousin, Glenn came over, he wasn’t even blood related he was more of a cousin-in-law. He was the most annoying person ever and thought he knew everything.
“Hi y/n. How’s it going?” He asked
“I’m fine, thanks. You?” You replied, this was probably the 50th time you said those four words this day.
“Great. Your boyfriend seems nice. Only I noticed you’re a little bit distant. I’m sorry to pry, but if your going through a rough patch, or even separated me and Sarah are the expert if rough patches, we could give you advise” ugh, what a nosey, person.
“Sam and I are fine, thanks” you said fed up of this man. You called Sam over, he instantly put a hand on your hip and you nearly melted. You leaned in closer to him an put your own arm around him.
“This is my cousin Sarah’s husband, Glenn” you introduced. Sam shook his hand, then Glenn was called by someone else and left. You turned around to Sam and stretched up to put both of your arms around his neck. He didn’t even flinch before putt his arms tightly around your waist.
“I don’t think we are convincing, that ass was talking about us being separated”
“How’s this for separated” Sam smirked before leaning is head down towards you and kissing you passionately. You didn’t think Sam’s lips would ever be on yours, you knew he was pretending, you were too. But this kiss was too real and you were convinced he meant it.
You pulled away, smiling at him, you took your arms from around his neck, and took both of his hands.
“Have you been drinking?” You asked, his last line sounded a little like Dean and Sam kind of morphed into his brother when he was drunk.
“Just two beers so far”
“Don’t get too drunk I don’t want you throwing up”
Sam leant down and kissed you on the lips again, making your stomach fill with butterflies.
The night went on with a lot of fake kisses, you got through it convincing everyone you were a couple…even Glenn. It was pretty late and you were going to head up to your room, you just needed to find Sam first, you either see if he was coming or to tell him you were.
You looked around the room were the reception was and you couldn’t spot Sam, which was an easy task to do considering his height.
You walked out the back to the smoking area where he was leaning against a railing with two other people who were talking amongst each other. They left almost as soon as you walked out and it was just you and Sam.
“What’s wrong?” You asked
“Noting. Just came out for some fresh air”
“Fresh air filled with cigarette smoke?” You laughed. He stepped leaning on the railing and stood up to face you.
“Your family is really nice y/n, they’re good people. I don’t understand why you left this life for a hunters”
You tilted your head back to look into your ‘boyfriend’ s eyes.
“I got kidnapped, and you saved me. No matter how much I love my family I love you guys aswell. You are my family. You have been here for me, not aunt Doris, not uncle Brian, you and your brother helped me through good and bad times”
Sam nodded his head accepting your answer.
You reached up to him and pressed a kiss to his lips.
“What was that for? There is no one here that we have to pretend?” Sam asked as he pulled away from you. You didn’t know whether to bullshit your way through this with an answer about a habit that formed within six hours, or tell him the truth. Truth is always best.
“I don’t want to pretend anymore Sam”
“I want the real thing”
“What do you mean?” He asked, either not understanding or wanting to know 100 % before he made a move.
“I have feelings for you, and I have for a long time” you blushed. Sam pressed a hand to your cheek and planted his lips on yours, you wrapped your arms around him and melted into the kiss as your bodies pressed against each other, his pecks and six pack hard against your stomach.
“Me too” he smiled after breaking the kiss. You turned your head to see your father standing there, clearly not impressed by what he had just saw.
“Sam. You seem like a nice bloke, but if you ever hurt my daughter I will kill you”
Your dad threatened, you face-palmed from embarrassment.
“I don’t intend to hurt her, sir” Sam said, offering his had to your Dad, he shook it and then you both walked through the crowded room back to your hotel room where you had the time of your life with the man you had been crushing on for so long.

things i’ve done at work lately
  • [hands out food on drive thru] “cool bye” [shuts window]
  • stopped a customer and made them throw their rubbish out
  • “hey can i have a-” “no.”
  • customer: hey what time do you finish?
    me: two minutes ago.
    customer: ha, i just finished. anyway, i’ll have a-
  • [to a deaf customer in AUSLAN]: hi how are you oh no- i forgot how to sign.
  • [to another deaf customer in AUSLAN]: sorry i forgot how to sign. hello! go slow.
  • “can i have an icecream?” “no the machine’s broken” “when will it be fixed?” “i don’t know.” “why is it always broken?” “because i knew you were coming.”
  • “can i have X flavoured drink?” “no, we don’t have any.” [customer drives to the window] “can you just check you really don’t have any of X flavour?” [i step back from the window, look around theatrically.] “no.”
  • “kids, stop screaming or santa won’t bring you any shiii-stuff.”
  • [constantly, to customers when it’s really busy] “so is where you work hiring?”
  • [wears makeup and bright green socks in front of regional manager] 
  • [to a trainee, in front of a customer who just paid with a fifty] “this is how we check for fake fifty dollar notes. now this lady looks nice and trustworthy, but that could be a front. she could be playing you.”
  • “LOOK AT THIS COOL COIN” (to various coworkers, managers, customers)
  • “can i have x?” “do you really have to?”
  • “can i have this?” “probably.”
  • rude old man: young lady fix your attitude or i’ll be talking with your manager.
    me: her name’s X, let me know how that goes. have a great night. [shuts window]

Rumplestiltskin AU based on today’s wheel ending, though -

Link is nine years old when he unknowingly gives away his best friend.

His momma has just lost her job, and without Jimmy there’s a real possibility that they might actually starve. They’re a month overdue in rent (according to the voice on the phone that Link hears screaming at his momma), and there’s nothing in the cupboard except some oats and a mouldy loaf of bread. 

He goes over to Rhett’s house for dinner with a plastic container and doesn’t eat anything, instead sneaking food into his school bag when no one is looking. Diane catches him and doesn’t say anything, just gives him extra portions so he’s eating instead of just saving food to take home. Later she’ll kiss him on the forehead and tell him that he’s such a good boy.

And then one day, a man stops Link when he’s walking home from school. Link knows about stranger danger, but he can’t help but stop when the man magics a fifty dollar note from behind his ear and gives it to him. 

The man does the same thing every day for a week, and Link forges his dad’s handwriting and stuffs the dollars into an envelope that he puts into the mailbox for his momma to find.

“I can fix it permanently, you know,” the man says one day. “I can make it so you and your momma never go hungry again.”

And of course Link is suspicious. “Whaddya want?”

“When you’re older, and you’re rich and you have lots of money, I want you to give me your most prized possession.”

And of course Link thinks, whatever fancy car he has, or whatever mansion he’ll live in, he’ll gladly give it to this guy if it means his mum’s wrists will never be quite so bony, and her eyes not always so red rimmed and smudged dark from lack of sleep. So he says “fair enough. If you actually take care of us, I’ll give you my most prized possession when I’m old and rich.”

Except he’s thirty-eight and the man comes back, looking exactly the same as he did nineteen years ago, and instead of asking for the FJ Cruiser or Link’s house or even Mythical Entertainment, the man nods his head towards Rhett, whose hands are waving in the air as he tells Lizzie and Daniela a hilarious story, and Link thinks,

“Oh shit.”

Title: Give Me Some of Those Hot (Cross) Buns [½]
Ship: AH OT6 
Warnings: Mild swearing.
WC: 4,411
Read on AO3 here

Prompt from iamtheoneinthehole: AH OT6 Prompt: Bakery!AU Geoff and the gents all work at a bakery, Michael, Ray and Gavin are all regulars there that frequently eat in/flirt with the gents while they’re there- none of the lads have ever met each other though since they come in at different hours. But then one day they all wind up in the bakery at the same time, all with the same intent of asking the gents to go on a date with them, and naturally shenanigans ensue ;)


Like his bread, Geoff had always been an early riser.

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