fic:grey zone

;grey zone (m)

pairing— kim seokjin x reader
genre/warnings— angst, smut, fluff
words— 10,481

summary— you and Jin used to date, but things ended pretty quickly, realising that maybe you guys weren’t meant to be. Over the past couple of months, he’s had to watch you with another guy, knowing it wasn’t right. However, what can he do when he’s stuck in a grey zone… he knows he too, isn’t right for you, but all he wants is to hold you…?

inspired bygrey zone, but I was listening to clairvoyant on repeat a lot too. 

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wolfthatcould submitted:

[left in stiles locker– definitely store bought but hey, they send a pretty powerful message]

Stiles couldn’t help it butlaugh once his locker was opened and he discovered the pineapple cookies there. He quickly turned around to check if Isaac was around but… Nope.

Getting his phone out, he quickly wrote the Beta a text message.

[text]: Are you trying to tell me that my jizz tasted bad?

The Grey Zone

::::

Black and White…

In respect to one’s inner balance, let’s consider it the two extremes.

The balance in between could be seen as the grey zone.

What does one strive for?

Well, hopefully, it would be the grey zone.

But remember one has to be willing to strive for balance in the first place.

Sometimes it seems more exciting to fly through life.

But when we run one self-will, we jump onto life’s pendulum.

Swinging back and forth, from black to white, never staying constant.

Running rampant on selfish desires.

Balance is the goal, and it is attainable.

But how? and what is it?

Inner peace…inner serenity..

Not letting all of the worldly chaos affect your being.

That seems impossible. Not letting life affect you?

Life will affect you, it’s inevitable. But it is how we respond to situations that occur in our life, not really how we react to them.

Reactions are immediate. Responses are reflective.

Impulsiveness must dissipate to slow down the pedulum.

Self seeking must dissapear.

but how…

when the swinging gets to be too much.

when the shades of grey grow blurry as you rush past them.

when you realize you are searching for a peace you cannot find.

a serenity that you cannot attain.

love that you cannot feel.

you will enter the shades of grey…

slowly.

you will be forced to stop, and you will know that it is time.

Time for what?

Time to go back to the basics….back to the middle…back to willingness…

Willingsness to strive for balance….

Willingness to be centered…

Willingness to rely on something other than yourself.

When you realize that the hole you are trying to fill inside of yourself is still empty.

You will find that only one thing fits in there perfectly…

::::

i want you so much closer than this
but we are so much better when we are not together

this song.  this song.

i want to hear this live; it would be phenomenal live.  my list of songs i want to hear nell perform is getting longer and longer … so far, it consists of “a.s.,” “hopeless valentine,” “afterglow,” “part 2,” “act 5,” “haven,” “1:03,” “counting pulses,” “beautiful strangers,” “ocean of light,” and, now, “grey zone.”  pfft, that’s almost a setlist there.

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