Halloween is still not here and yet I’m in a horror mood, so I scribbled a bunch of spooks from the jumbled machinations of my mind. Biography-wise they are:

-Count Van Zaff: An elderly 1000+ year old vampire that, tired of the usual routine of his kind, decided to retire himself to an old abandoned manor to live an eternity of peaceful solitude, but little did he know that his home would attract strange bizzare beings that he ultimely would have to contend with.
    While aged the Count is just as devious as he was in his prime when the situation calls for it but otherwise he’s a neutral figure that would rather read and drink mantis juice all day for he is a «Demon of Culture» in his own words, although he would rather avoid bureaucratic matters at all times.
    In his solitude he is accompanied by his pet bat Prometheus that, following its natural death, was brought back to life as a machine to always be at the Count’s side. Seemingly innocuous the robotic mammal is a deceptive rascal that’s all too willing to torment noisy outsiders with its ghastly enhancements.

-Doc Fritz: Enigmatic and overall perplexing, Fritz is the remains of a brilliant scientist that, refusing to accept death, perpetuaded his existence exponentially by uploading his brain into a spider-like automaton.
          In a fateful day he crossed paths with Count Zaff who was mourning over the passing of his pet Prometheus and sensing a shiny opportunity, he offered to revive the bat in exchange for residence in the Count’s Manor. Following the bat’s sucessful mechanization, Fritz got himself the secured haven that he needed for his nebulous research on all things science-related.
          In spite of his good companionship with the Count, Fritz tends to come off as over-bearing and rude to most people for he values his work above all else in a stern manner and doesn’t think much of distractions in his free time, although he does have fascination with astrology which has been rooted to him since childhood. Due to a bug in the voice modulator of his automaton suit, his voice at times can vary between being scratchy or smooth depending on how tense, excited or calm Fritz is at the moment.

-Adam: One of Fritz’s creations, Adam came to be when the Count requested to the Doc a servant to do the common chores in the house. Big and imposing, Adam is in reality a rather ambivalent figure that has more into his personality that his apperance would suggest.
     For once his default choice of clothing tailored by the Count gave him a taste for requinted fashion and his repeated work on the vampire’s library made him a literary know-it-all over the course of his existence. While a suprising personality, Adam is very sleepy due to his long work hours and often needs custom made batteries to alleviate the exhaustion and at times his blocky hands (a design oversight by the Doc) make him panicky on more especific actions.

-Emperor Toht: On one day during an antique fair Adam brought a strange bird-like sacrophagus home as a gift to the Count, but little did the Manor’s residents know that the it would contain their next member, the Once-Emperor of the Land of the Red Sands, Toht.
             Among the inhabitants of Zaff’s manor, Toht is the most pompuous and extravagant although he’s deep down the grouchiest of the bunch since he’s still bound to the earth by unknown circumstances instead of being on the afterlife with the rest of his lineage and he’s not happy about it, not one bit. Initially wanting to be the new owner of the residence, Toht begrudingly had to relent to the Count and ultimely occupies the top floor of the manor alongside his mummified undead pets, practicing occult rituals and trying to fix what went wrong with his death in order to escape from his undead existence. 

            Although he looks down on the Doc and Adam for being «dirty peasants», Toht has gradually developed some degree of respect for the elderly vampire lord in terms of the Count’s noble figure which nostalgically reminds Toht of his glory days.

-Miss Helga: During one of Fritz’s experiments he was about to create another servant to help out Adam but, because of a distracted slip-up, a mound of carnivorous plants was mixed with the subject and the end result surfaced as a deranged plant-like construct.
           Helga, as the Doc named as he was developing her, is a heavily bipolar being since her mutated state gives to her a very unorthodox perception of reality, one moment she could be as gentle as a lamb and by the next she could be chewing down on a poor sap’s neck, although she’s more natural towards those she accustomed to. Her voice is often jokingly refered as her «scariest» atribute for it’s a deep croaky voice that clashes with her otherwise colorful appearance and scares off the unexpected and the ignorant.
           In spite of her original function Helga mostly works as the Count’s gardener and on her wake the Manor’s gardens ended up filled with odd foliage made of her own design and being, complete with enhanced sentience and even some extent of unique personalities to each one. Relations-wise, Helga goes along with the Doc and Adam, tends to be on and off with Count particularly on more superficial matters and is openly antagonistic towards Toht butting heads with him far too often over the latter’s high-above-all attitude.

me, inevitably, after new material is released: damn it to hell mariel. them pesky fascist apologists got into the villains again. get me the broom

mariel my sweet wife: dear, you know your efforts never achieve anything and just annoy the neighbors. you can lead a horse to water but you can’t make him appreciate antagonists in a wholesome and mature way



Following an incident involving toxic sludge, a gecko and a couple of used cars from the 80s, this mutant freak is all about the road and the rage that it inspires on him. Unless you have a gallon of thick gasoline to make him tipsy, he’s assured to run you over by using 8 different daredevil maneuvers.