fetch my smelling salts!

anonymous asked:

So when Emma uses the possessive “My” or “Mine” it’s the most romantic thing in the world for CSers, but when Rumple uses it he’s a misogynistic asshole? The hypocrisy of that fandom has no limits.

What a coincidence–they think the same when Killykins says she’s “his Emma.” 

Gasp. Could it be…hypocrisy? Say not so! I am so utterly shocked! Fetch my smelling salts!

Progressive Chelsie Shipping Chart: Series 1 through 6

This is an update of a little something I did after S4. I’ve redone it to include events from S5 and S6. This is exactly how the insanity began, friends, with a picture of a castle and a pooch’s rump. Read through this and see how close the description comes to your actual shipping experience. I imagine it’s been pretty similar for all of us.

Hmm. What’s this? A show called Downton Abbey? Oh, a doggie! Its little bum! How cute!

 _______________________________________________________________

That butler guy has a sexy voice. The housekeeper is really pretty.

 _______________________________________________________________

Oh, lookie here. She’s asking if he’s ever thought about marriage. Look at them LOOKING at each other. *shippy radar pinging loudly and quickly* Oh, this should be a thing.

 _______________________________________________________________

He’s jealous because that farmer proposed to her. (Of course, she said no!) Oh, I’m really feeling it now. This NEEDS to be a thing.

  _______________________________________________________________

Oh, no! He’s collapsed in the middle of dinner! She’s so worried, and see how she takes care of him! OMG, she’s in his BEDROOM! I ship it! I ship it!

  _______________________________________________________________

No, no, no! He can’t LEAVE! She’ll miss him. She will. Very much. And it costs her nothing to say it. And just LISTEN to how she says it!

  _______________________________________________________________

Phew, he never did leave. But now, he’s sick in bed again, and look who’s fussing over him once more! I ship it SO hard!

  _______________________________________________________________

CANCER! NOOOOOOO!!! She can’t. See how crushed he is, thinking he might lose her! But no, she’s ok. And he’s so relieved HE’S SINGING FOR HER! HE’S SINGING!!! I can’t breathe!

  _______________________________________________________________

Sniffle, sniffle, weep, sob. Lady Sybil died. She’s comforting him. She’s touching his arm. He’s covering her hand with his own! ACTUAL PHYSICAL CONTACT!!! I think I may fall over.

  _______________________________________________________________

These two! Honestly! While the kids are getting ready to go the fair, these hornballs are having eyesex right there at the servants’ table! Get a room!

  _______________________________________________________________

He’s angry, but she’s calming him down. She’s touching his chest! Quick! Fetch my smelling salts!

 _______________________________________________________________

Grigg! Alice! (She means nothing to him! Nothing, I tell you!) Crumpled letter. Wastebasket. Train station. Walking back together. Drinking sherry. Picture frame. And the looks! Just LOOK at the looks! I ship it so bad it hurts! Crying! Actual tears!

 _______________________________________________________________ 

FLIRTING?!?!?! Is Mr. Charles Carson actually flirting?

 _______________________________________________________________ 

HAAAAAAAAALP! THEY’RE AT THE BEACH TOGETHER! BAREFOOT! HOLDING HANDS!!! HE SAID “RISQUE”! Sweet Chelsie above, please have mercy on my poor shippy heart! ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL I can’t even take it. I can’t even … I can’t odd … I can’t … I cannot! I have lost my ability to can! Canning hath forsaken me. I can’t even can’t! There is no canning whatsoever to be had. Dead. Dead. Dead. As in, “not alive any more.” Like, “no longer living.” That is to say, “existing no more.”

 _______________________________________________________________ 

Charles Carson, you sly dog! Really? “Nobody has to know everything”? “I don’t like it when we’re not on the same side“?  "It puts us back in agreement”? "Get away with you!”? HE’S FLIRTING AGAIN, AND SHE’S FLUSTERED! I’M FLUSTERED! I’m an incoherent mess! Unable to English! Cannot word!

 _______________________________________________________________ 

“Invest in a property together”? “A business venture”? Are you kidding me? Investment, my eye! Business, my foot! Oh, help me! Something’s going to explode. My head? My eyeballs? My lungs? My heart? Everything? I can’t tell! It hurts so goooooood!

 _______________________________________________________________ 

They’re looking at houses!

 _______________________________________________________________ 

But no! She can’t go in on the deal with him. She’s crushed. He’s heartbroken. I’m beyond help.

_______________________________________________________________ 

But wait! HE’S ACTUALLY PROPOSING!!! MARRIAGE!!! FOR REAL! He does want to be stuck with her, and he’s not marrying anyone else, and of course, she’ll marry him, and he’s AN OLD BOOBY! And he’s so happy he’s crying. And I’m crying. And we’re all crying! ARGLBARGL!!! Highly lordship! Æßñçęøîżšùłáå@&$#%€£¥*!? BARROW! Bring me my swooning sofa! On the double!

 _______________________________________________________________ 

Oh, no! She’s worried about certain “aspects” of marriage … concerned about his seeing her as she is now. How silly is that? We all know how much he adores her.

_______________________________________________________________ 

See? He thinks she’s beautiful. And he loves her. And he’s happy and tickled and bursting with pride that she would agree to be his wife. He finally said the “L” word! He loves her! Oh, my gosh! We knew it all along, but I can’t believe he said all that! “And if she feels that she must … withdraw …”? Are you kidding me? Don’t even go there!  Do not! “Pat-a-cake friendship lie?” Damn straight! Friendship is part of it, yes, but this is Love with a capital “L.” It will be a real marriage. A true marriage. Living as closely as two people can. There will be nookie! Every night. And most mornings, too. Maybe even the occasional nooner in his pantry or her sitting room.  (I read about something like that in a fanfic once, maybe, I think.)

_______________________________________________________________ 

But he thinks she’s had second thoughts. See how sad he is! Nine days’ wonder, my foot! Nine days? He’ll never “get over it.” But no, he misunderstands her. She hasn’t changed her mind at all. She was just worried that she might disappoint him – that she might not please him. But if he’s sure … And he’s never been so sure of anything! And if he wants her, he can have her – warts and all! (Why is she (mis?-)quoting Oliver Cromwell here? Never mind. I don’t care.)

 _______________________________________________________________ 

He’s leaning in … and he’s touching her shoulder and her neck and her face – oh, so gently … aaaaaand … they’re kissing! KissingKissingKISSING! For real! On the lips! Their lips … are … touchingTHEIR LIPS ARE TOUCHING!!! Their mouths are actually making contact! Wait!  Do I see some tongue? This is not a drill! It’s a real, honest-to goodness kiss! And it’s glorious! And now they’re hugging … cuddling … snuggling … just holding each other contentedly. And I’ll bet he’s whispering sweet nothings in her ear – how much he loves her and how beautiful she is. And just look at her contented, relieved smile! It’s everything we hoped for and dreamed of – but thought we’d never get!

But we did get it. And here it is. And I am going to re-watch this scene 936, 274, 875, 148, 516 times until my eyeballs fall out. I need to drink a cigarette … smoke a stiff drink. Wait. I don’t smoke … or drink. Doesn’t matter. I need to start. Oh, help!

_______________________________________________________________ 

He’s going to walk with her to the home farm? A date! They’re “walking out”!

_______________________________________________________________ 

The reception location? Pft. They’re disagreeing over that? It’s not important, and they’ll sort it, so I’m going to not going to worry too much. La-dee-da. Blissfully ignoring this nonsense.

_______________________________________________________________ 

Oh, look! They’re arguing. See how in love they are! My babies love each other so much that they’re fighting. True love, I tell you. The quarreling only proves it. They’re so cute even when they’re disagreeing!

_______________________________________________________________ 

See, here! Our babies are out an on another date! At the … um … well, at the livestock show. Along with everyone else. How terribly romantic. But I don’t care. They’re together, and they’re sweet.

_______________________________________________________________ 

Finally! The reception location is settled. Charles Carson and Elsie Hughes! Just look at the way they’re looking at each other! In front of the family! Their love is on display for all to see.

_______________________________________________________________ 

Do you see these adorable über-goobers?! Do you see them?! Do you see how endearing they are?! Old boobies! He just wants to see her one last time before the big event, to be alone with her for a few more minutes. They’re so nervous and excited that they hardly know what to do with themselves – how to stand or where to put their hands! Cuteness overload! This might be the most adorable thing ever! I ask you, have you ever seen such irresistible sweetness?

_______________________________________________________________ 

And they’re getting married! The wedding! We get to see some of the vows and the giving of the ring! And now they’re officially hitched! Mr. and Mrs. Carson!  Mr. and Mrs. Charles and Elsie Carson! The Carsons*runs around the room like one of those out-of-control cartoon characters* They’re walking down the aisle, and she’s so giddy that she can barely contain her excitement, and he’s just beaming with pride! She’s biting her lip to hide her grin and to keep from shrieking with joy, and he’s strutting down the aisle like a peacock, chest puffed out, thinking, “Oh, yeah, baby!  I wifed her!” I cannot can! And a post-nuptial smooch! And he’s the happiest and luckiest of men! And she’s a woman of such grace and charm, and she’s entrusted her life’s happiness to him. It passeth all understanding. (Well, no, not really. We all understand perfectly.)

It’s happened. It’s really happened. They’re married. After five seasons and thirteen Downton years, they’re finally wed. (Why did no one listen to us from the very first episode? We called it in April of 1912! Why did it take until May of 1925 for everyone else to catch up?) And once again, I can muster no ability to can. My canning capacity is precisely zero. My can is completely empty. I have serious case of CAN’T. Maybe even full-blown CANNOT – or perhaps the most deadly strain: CANNOT EVEN*reminds self to breathe: “deep breaths, now”*

_______________________________________________________________ 

They’re back from the honeymoon! I’m disappointed that we didn’t get to see any of it (they’ve been gone nearly the whole episode, and I’ve missed them so!), but they look so happy. Look at how happy they look! Ah, wedded bliss! I’m going to cry!

_______________________________________________________________ 

Eek! Sofa snuggling! Couch cuddling! But they’re interrupted. Of course. Fie on thee, Barrow!

_______________________________________________________________ 

But the honeymoon’s over. Cooking-gate! Stupid! Grrr! Grumble, grumble. Maybe I can just pretend it’s all a bad dream. Fast forward. Wait.  Rewind. She is pretty silly, flapping her wrist around; and he is kinda funny, bumbling around the kitchen; and she’s looking at him so lovingly … Ok, so there is that, at least …

_______________________________________________________________ 

He’s a curmudgeon. But she’s not going off him, because he’s her curmudgeon, and that makes all the difference! She’s kissing him in the kitchen – in broad daylight and in plain view! And he likes it! He’s smiling! Smirking so smugly! He’s so pleased with himself for having done something right! (Though he probably has no idea what exactly he’s done to make her love him!) And don’t even try to tell me that these two don’t get up to all sorts of hanky-panky in their love nest.

Who would have thought? The butler and the housekeeper smooching downstairs in the middle of the workday! All my dreams have come true!

_______________________________________________________________ 

Oh, no! His hand is shaking. But she’s his wife, and she loves him. He’s got to retire – or at least step back a bit. It will be a different life, but they can make a go of it. (I kinda wish they’d been allowed to choose to retire – together – instead of having retirement forced on them … or on him, at least. But whatever, Fellowes.) And they’re kissing again! Happy New Year, Charlie and Elsie! Happily ever after! Sigh. *puppy dog heart eyes*

_______________________________________________________________ 

Right, then. Soooooo … Now, what? It’s over. All over. What will I do with my life now? I feel so empty inside. (Not even kidding here.)

*Special thanks to @brenna-louise for helping me track down particular scenes.*

10

OMFG!!! OPERATION HOT SPRING! IS THIS REALLY A MAINLAND PERIOD DRAMA?! I’ve fetched my smelling salts but they aren’t helping! This show single-handedly re-defines the definition of OTP perfection! I have NEVER seen anything like this in any Asian drama and I have seen A LOT!  I can’t believe that they’ve actually released the whole scene beforehand but I’m not complaining.  I can’t wait!

This is an update of a little something I did after S4.  I’ve redone it to include events from S5.  I’m sure S6 will be off the charts.  This is exactly how the insanity begins, friends, with a picture of a castle and a pooch’s rump.  Read through this and see how close the description comes to your actual shipping experience.  I’d imagine it’s been pretty similar for all of us.

Hmm.  What’s this?  A show called Downton Abbey?


Oh, a doggie!  Its little bum!  How cute!


That butler guy has a sexy voice.  The housekeeper is really pretty.


Oh, lookie here.  She’s asking if he’s ever thought about marriage.  Look at them LOOKING at each other.  *shippy radar pinging loudly and quickly* Oh, this should be a thing.


He’s jealous because that farmer proposed to her.  (Of course, she said no!)  Oh, I’m really feeling it now.  This NEEDS to be a thing.


Oh, no! He’s collapsed in the middle of dinner!  She’s so worried, and see how she takes care of him!  OMG, she’s in his BEDROOM!    I ship it!  I ship it!


No, no, no!  He can’t LEAVE!  She’ll miss him.  She will.  Very much.  And it costs her nothing to say it.  And just LISTEN to how she says it!


Phew, he never did leave.  But now, he’s sick in bed again, and look who’s fussing over him once more!  I ship it SO hard!


CANCER! NOOOOOOO!!!  She can’t.  See how crushed he is, thinking he might lose her!  But no, she’s ok.  And he’s so relieved HE’S SINGING FOR HER!  HE’S SINGING!!!  I can’t breathe!


Sniffle, sniffle, weep, sob.  Lady Sybil died.  She’s comforting him.  She’s touching his arm.  He’s covering her hand with his own!  ACTUAL PHYSICAL CONTACT!!!  I think I may fall over.


These two!  Honestly!  While the kids are getting ready to go the fair, these hornballs are having eyesex right there at the servants’ table!  Get a room!


He’s angry, but she’s calming him down.  She’s touching his chest!  Quick!  Fetch my smelling salts!


Grigg!  Alice!  (She means nothing to him!  Nothing, I tell you!)  Crumpled letter.  Wastebasket.  Train station.  Walking back together.  Drinking sherry.  Picture frame.  And the looks!  Just LOOK at the looks!  I ship it so bad it hurts!  Crying!  Actual tears!


FLIRTING?!?!?!  Is Mr. Charles Carson actually flirting?  HAAAAAAAAALP!


THEY’RE AT THE BEACH TOGETHER!  BAREFOOT!  HOLDING HANDS!!!  HE SAID, “RISQUE”!  Sweet Chelsie above, please have mercy on my poor shippy heart!  ASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKLASDFGHJKL  I can’t even take it.  I can’t even …  I can’t odd …  I can’t … I cannot!  I have lost my ability to can!  Canning hath forsaken me.  I can’t even can’t!  There is no canning whatsoever to be had.  Dead.  Dead.  Dead.  As in, “not alive any more.”  Like, “no longer living.”  That is to say, “existing no more.”


“Nobody needs to know everything!”?  “Get away with you!”?

HE’S FLIRTING AGAIN, AND SHE’S FLUSTERED!  I’M FLUSTERED!  I’m an incoherent mess! Unable to English! Cannot words!


“Invest in a property together?” Are you kidding me? “A business venture?” Oh, help me! Something’s going to explode. My head? My eyeballs? My lungs? My heart? Everything? I can’t tell! It hurts so goooooood!


They’re looking at houses!


But no!  She can’t go in on the deal with him. She’s crushed.  He’s heartbroken.  I’m beyond help.


But wait!  HE’S ACTUALLY PROPOSING!!!  MARRIAGE!!!  FOR REAL!  He does want to be stuck with her, and he’s not marrying anyone else, and of course, she’ll marry him, and he’s AN OLD BOOBY!  And he’s so happy he’s crying.  And I’m crying.  And we’re all crying!

ARGLBARGL!!! Highly lordship! Æßñçęøîżšùłáå@&$#%€£¥*!?

BARROW!  Bring me my swooning sofa!  On the double!

“Hello?  911?  Yes, this is chelsie fan.  I’d like to reserve an ambulance and book an ER bed for Sunday, September 20th…  No, I do not have an emergency right now, but I’m going to have one soon…  What do you mean, ‘That’s not the way it works’?”

And that, friends, is how it all began.  And how it continued.  And how it intensified.  And how it will end.  So get your affairs in order before Sunday.

Love to all -

chelsie fan

3

Life has been tumultuous lately, and I totally forgot that January 10th was the fifth year anniversary of The Dailies. Fortunately, comics are not aware of the passage of time (to my knowledge). 

As a human, however, I am aware of the passage of time sometimes. For example, I know that my upcoming book contains 1,096 days of comic strips from the total 1,830 strips made so far.  

You will be able to hold this book in your hands at TCAF this May, which is only 115 comic strips from now. My publisher has also informed me that we might have a handful of advance copies in time for The MoCCA Festival. 

This book will be hardcover and adorned with silver and gold. The contents will be full colour. It will likely be heavy enough to subdue a home intruder if thrown correctly. 

Although I’m a little surprised to realize that five years have passed since I started this project, my mind is most blown by the fact that there’s a James Kochalka quote on the back of my book. Fetch me my smelling salts, someone. 

Anyway, thanks for reading and keep your eyes out for this thing. Happy belated birthday, comics. 

10

Is there a second Christmas this year?! Because that’s how today feels right now, after I’ve watched 2014 SBS Drama Awards! I wouldn’t have missed this for the world! I’ve been waiting for this moment for 10 months and the wait was definitely worth it! One of my all-time favourite OTPs back together, laughing, hugging…

  • 2 FREAKINGLY PERFECT HUGS!!!
  • JJH GIVING KSH 100 POINTS FOR HIS KISSING SKILLS!
  • KSH BEING IN HIS FULL FANBOY MODE, LITERALLY WORSHIPPING THE GROUND HIS JJH NOONA WAS WALKING ON (I suspect he is her greatest fan.)!  
  • MY OTP WINNING THE BEST COUPLE AWARD!
  • JJH WALKING ON KSH’S ARM!
  • 2 HILARIOUS YWCFTS PARODIES!
  • THE WHOLE MALE YWCFTS TEAM BEING A TOTAL DMJ♥CSY SHIPPER ARMADA, CHEERING THEIR OTP ON WHILE THE PD-NIM RECORDED THESE HISTORICAL MOMENTS FOR THE FUTURE GENERATIONS ON HIS SMARTPHONE!
  • YWCFTS BEING THE COMPLETE WINNER OF THE NIGHT, SWEEEPING 10 AWARDS! THIS MUST BE A RECORD!
  • THE ONLY THING MISSING WAS SHIN SUNG ROK WISHING EVERYBODY “TO BE IN GOOD HEALTH” IN 2015! LOL!!!

If there was ever a moment to fetch my smelling salts it was THIS!!! The final epilogue in the epic DMJ♥CSY lovestory!

9

5-ji Kara 9-ji Made (From Five to Nine - The Handsome Monk Who Fell in Love With Me)

I LOVE IT! I LOVE HIM! I LOVE THEM!!! First, I want to thank the jdrama gods for finally delivering to me both a well-made bona-fide rom-com after four years of abstinence and disappointments and also the first Yamapi show in 6 years that I genuinely like. I know it’s still early days but the giddiness, the tingling in my toes, the butterflies in my stomach, the need to fetch my smelling salts… its all there! A major addiction has arrived! It’s probably no coincidence that the last two jdramas that managed to inspire the same feelings in me were 2012′s RMPW and 2009′s Buzzer Beat. 

5→9 starring Yamashita Tomohisa and Ishihara Satomi has aired on Monday and scored a strong 12,7 % rating for its first episode. (The title is a reference to the female lead’s working hours.) But, of course,no english subtitles have been released yet, so I guess I will need to rely on my extremely limited understanding of Japanese. It’s a live-action adaptation of a manga by Aihara Miki. I haven’t read it nor do I feel the need to start now considering live actions tend to deviate greatly from the original works.

Yamashita Tomohisa and Ishihara Satomi are simply perfect together and they share this insane chemistry and I can’t wait for the time the romance will start for real! I’ve seen only the first episode but I already adore the OTP to bits. Hoshikawa Takane and Sakuraba Junko are the polar opposites of each other and they clash - he is a buddhist monk, old-fashioned, taciturn, reserved and coldly polite, while she is frank, bubbly and modern and dreams of moving to NYC one day.

This is what I call that a story starts with a bang! They meet for the first time at a funeral service when Junko accidently knocks over a bowl of ashes which land directly on Takane’s head - well, I say better the ashes and not the bowl or else there would be no story to tell and I would hate to be deprived of some steamy kisses. BRING THE KISSES IT ON!

9

FETCH MY SMELLING SALTS! I haven’t been writing anything about Poldark but I’ve been sailing on the Demelza/Ross ship for the past 3 weeks and the last 10 minutes of today episode were simply mindblowing!

He is completely defeated, blaming himself for everything that happened to Jim, and seeing that dress on Demelza is the last straw and he lashes out on the only target that is available - her. He says to her hurtful things, things he doesn’t actually feel nor think, but it’s his only coping/defense mechanism in the fucked-up situation he is in. It’s the first time he is angry with her, hell, he is completely livid but just the mere sight of her tears makes him completely forget his anger and beg for her forgiveness, trying to make amends, the plea apparent in his eyes. And then he stops trying to resist the undeniable attraction between them and simply gives in and KISSES HER! THE FEELS!

9

“I don’t go to hotels casually. I’m serious about you so, please, date me.”

And then he PINS HER AGAINST THE WALL, ASKS HER WHY IT CAN’T BE HIM (hyperventilating here!) AND KISSES HER (fetching my trusty smelling salts!)!!!

Hanae pushes him away and runs and is spotted by Yu who notices Yuto standing dejectedly in the lift. OK, THE GAME IS ON!