fetal stages

Anyways terfs are so fucking disgusting and ignorant bc they like to always come with that shit of “only XX or XY chromosomes” when in reality biology is complex as hell and can and will often have many occurences and/or mistakes that cause ppl to be born with XXY or XYY chromosomes, and sometimes ppl are born with an XY chromosome but don’t get the genes responsible for testosterone production during fetal stages and thus never develop a penis but like idk since yall like to talk about biology books so much how about yall cunts read them lol

Creepypasta #1291: My First And Last Time Ding Dong Ditching

Length: Long

This happened not that long ago when I was 14. It was the middle of summer, and I was spending the night at a friend’s house. In total, there were four of us there that night, and in order to preserve confidentiality, I will refer to those friends as Jim, James and Tom. The four of us had just come back to Jim’s house after an hour of exercise at one of those trampoline jump places. It was late by the time we returned, but we all decided that the night was still young and to stay out for a while. Typical rambunctious teens right?

I remember checking my phone to see that it was 10 o’clock. Now, I was always very precautious when it came to venturing through the late hours of the night, especially in an unfamiliar area. I went along with the idea due to the facts that: A: We were in a large group B: Jim’s neighborhood was well lit thanks to a great number of lamp posts C: I knew that we all were carrying phones and were fast runners in case of an emergency.

I figured we would be fine. That was my first mistake. After a good hour of walking through the illuminated upper-class boulevard and engaging in discussions that only the brain of a 14 year old male would find riveting, we came to the end of the street. A rather dilapidated metal gate stood before us in obscene contrast from the modern look of the previous houses. A particularly foreboding dead end sign stared at the four of us. Beyond the obstacle was a barren expanse of ground and dirt piles. It looked as if it was in the fetal stages of becoming a suburb. Three of us stopped in our tracks, but Jim oddly kept walking. I piped up.

“Wait, Jim, we’re leaving? But there’s nothing out there but a buncha dirt.”

“No, there’s another neighborhood back there.”

I pulled out my phone again and saw that it was already 11. No wonder my legs had began getting tired. We had been walking for about an hour, albeit very slowly, but that plus the jumping from earlier was starting to take its toll. 

Luckily James added, “I dunno dude, don’t you want to just go back to your place and chill? It’s gettin late bro.”

Jim had already hopped the gate when he said, “C’mon guys don’t be wusses.”

And so, the four of us continued our journey into the next neighborhood. Second mistake. Now I need to mention the layout of this neighborhood because it will be important later. While Jim’s neighborhood was practically a giant circle, this place seemed to be just one single street. Though this wasn’t the only difference. As soon as I set foot on the dark gravel of the road, I knew something wasn’t right. I wasn’t sure what it was at the time… something just felt off.

My senses can probably be attributed to the fact that this neighborhood was much darker. Compared to this, Jim’s street might as well have been the red carpet. Not only were there not as many streetlights, but it was as if all the previously bright stars had been blown out like candles and the moon had been covered by a cloud dense enough to just constrict its glowing beam.

As we walked, I also noticed that the energy felt off. Like it was too quiet and we weren’t supposed to be there. We were walking into an open crypt, and it was only a matter of time before the gravekeeper came for us trespassers. As we walked, it was apparent that our previously carefree and lax chatter had been replaced with an apprehensive silence. Though when we began to see a faint light illuminating from a little ways ahead of us, we began to slowly regain our composure.

As we neared, it turned out that light source was coming from a streetlight and I also noticed that the seemingly one way street had a left turn and it was on this corner which the streetlight sat. Though the strange thing about this corner was that rather than it being a turn into another long street like the one we had been walking on, it simply turned into one house. No more accompanied it on either side and the road which it was on literally ended right after this one house. We all thought this was peculiar and in a way kinda funny. So of course, when Jim suggested we ding dong ditch someone, we all knew the house to pick. Third mistake.

The actual process of the ditch went perfectly. James, Tom and I hid in a bush on the property as Jim snuck up and delivered three startling blows to the front door. Almost immediately after the knock, a light turned on inside one of the upstairs windows. The four of us took this as our cue to book it out of there. Though in the excitement and commotion of running away, we had made a wrong turn down the unfamiliar street rather than heading back in the direction of the dirt mounds and Jim’s neighborhood. 

Keep reading

M(L/S-a) || Framework!Fitz and Melissa


Finally, one of them was working.  Projects M, versions A-K had all died in early stages, except for G, who had become fetal-level conscious (stage N) but psychotic.  Megan, he’d called that one, that clone of the agent next in line of succession, but she’d had to be put down and recycled like the rest once it became clear that her self-inflicted strangulation was unrecoverable.  Now he was on version L, and she’d made it to stage S, full physical development and the first inklings of consciousness.

Of course, the real Melinda May had no idea that Fitz was using her genetics in this way.  Only Madame Hydra knew what he was doing in these dark rooms, lit crimson to maintain the womb-like conditions, watching the potential replacement thrive.  After all, it was May who’d inadvertently caused the slaughter that had allowed Hydra to grab hold of that fear and paint the world with it.  Some might find her…less than ideal in the position she had.  So there was a replacement ready.

M(L/S-a) wasn’t a normal clone, either.  She’d had her DNA infused with that of some alien corpse that had fallen to Earth during the Convergence, hence the sub-designation a.  The idea was that the extraterrestrial genetics, just a hint, not as much as the difference between humans and Inhumans, would stabilize her genome.  And by Alveus, it was working.

Fitz couldn’t help it.  It was an absurdly dramatic thing to do, but he reached over and flicked the tank when the clone began to gain consciousness.  Don’t tap on the glass, he remembered seeing at every aquarium ever, just as vividly as he remembered perpetually ignoring it.

It's to save my own life

As a longtime fertility patient, I have learned so much about pregnancy and prenatal development. Much more than I had being a biology major. I think if pro lifers were educated, they would change their ways.

In order to have a live birth, often abnormal embryos have to be destroyed. Even if an embryo is normal, most likely it will not survive anyhow. That’s just how it is. Before it reaches the fetal stage, it has a decent chance of dying as well. The embryo is so primitive, cannot feel pain or think. In the first few weeks, the embryo cannot be seen and often actually is a ball of cells. The pro lifers who view primitive life as more important than a fully grown mother are ludicrous. 

Knowing this gave me a tiny bit of comfort during my miscarriages. Pro-lifers think once you have two pink lines on a pregnancy test, you have a child. The truth is, only if you are lucky. 

Back to the subject of miscarriages, pro life propaganda made my miscarriages so much worse! I know a lot of facts and pictures they use are lies, I just have to keep telling myself that, or feel much sadder again.


Because my HCG levels are monitored closely, I had a few ectopic scares. I would HAVE to have an abortion if I wanted to save my fertility or even my life. And the pro life community wants to take that right away! I can’t support people who don’t care about my health or my desire to have children.

While undergoing fertility treatments, I was at risk of multiples. Quite often in order to have a live birth, aborting some of the embryos is needed because multiples can be very risky. 

I’m currently pregnant and having all sorts of complications. If I didn’t want this baby so much I don’t think I could do it. It’s like I have a chronic illness. I’m nauseated, dizzy, ditzy and too tired to do much anything, but I can rarely get comfortable. I have to use the bathroom a million times a day, yet am constipated. I have to take tons of expensive meds including several injections to stay healthy. I was on bedrest and lost my job, if I can even manage to work at all. Pregnancy isn’t easy, at least for me. I’d hate to think of someone being forced into it who didn’t have the family support I do.

My point is, even someone who wants nothing more than to have a child can still be pro choice. It’s because I’m educated and know the truth.

anonymous asked:

emma, weird question for you: how do you choose if a pic should have a tag "fetus harry" or just "harry"? I mean, with which age the boys don't fit in the "fetus" tag anymore?

so in my tagging system, it goes like this:

fetus harry: harry pre-txf (so anything from when he was a baby to age 16)
fetus louis: louis pre-txf (so anything from when he was a baby to age 18)
fetus hl: louis/harry from 2010 and early 2011 (cause i consider the first year they knew each other to be their “fetal” stage so to speak)

i think most people use fetus louis/fetus harry tags to include stuff from 2010 and 2011, but i do it a little differently. hope that makes sense!!

anonymous asked:

Can you do a holtzmann x fem reader have a kid together, and it be really fluffy? Thanks!

(Anon who requested #477, this is also for you! This came out really long and involved and I still feel like I barely did the topic justice. There’s some discussion of the unpleasant aspects of having a baby, with a pregnant Reader, so if that’ll be a squick for you, maybe avoid this one. Otherwise, enjoy your baby fluff!)

“That is totally correct…Jaime, right? See, you guys have got this. So knowing that an ion is a charged particle, what does that usually tell us about how it’s made up, do you think? Yeah, Madison?”

A few times a year, the Ghostbusters opened the firehouse as part of an educational outreach initiative to teach local schoolkids about science in action. All grade levels came through and got presentations from each member of the team, but you especially loved to watch Holtzmann, now your wife, with the elementary schoolers. The kids adored her–you imagined she seemed like an educational cartoon character come to life, with her dancing and voices and eccentric outfits, safety goggles always included. In turn, she thrived on their enthusiasm. You couldn’t hide your broad smile as you watched Holtzmann help a little girl with a model atom, and she smiled back radiantly when she caught your eye from across the room.

Patty joined you in the back of the room; she’d just finished talking to a group of high schoolers about the history of science in New York. She gave you an extremely knowing look. “Little case of baby fever, huh?” she asked quietly.

“What?” You had trouble keeping your voice down after that question.

“Oh, come on, do not try to deny it,” Patty said. “You’ve gotta be thinking about starting a family with Holtzy. You just about melt every time we see a toddler in public…yes, you do. And don’t think I haven’t noticed you liking all those cute baby videos on Facebook.”

“No, no, no, no, no,” you laughed, even though you knew that Patty, just like Jaime about the ions, was totally correct. “We aren’t ready…we aren’t ready for kids yet! That’s just me thinking babies are cute, like everybody else.”

“Uh-huh,” Patty said, clearly not buying it. “Last time I checked, being married for two years and gainfully employed makes you pretty damn qualified to have a kid. You two know what you’re about, of course, but you’d make great parents. And nine months is a lot of time to baby-proof an apartment. Just saying.” With that, she gave you a pointed look and walked off to prepare for her next lecture group.

That evening, you joined Holtzmann on the couch in your apartment, where she was running some schematic software on her sticker-plastered laptop. You curled up against her shoulder and pretended to read your own book for a while, then gave up and just alternated between watching her face and the laptop screen. Without taking her eyes off her work, Holtzmann pressed a spontaneous kiss to your temple and started giving your scalp a little one-handed massage. You sighed contentedly and cuddled in closer. After a moment, you broke the comfortable silence.

“Hey, Holtz?”


“Have you ever thought about us having a baby?”

You expected either a deflective quip or even a panicked shutdown in response. Instead, Holtzmann put aside her laptop and turned to look at you sincerely. “Yeah, I have,” she said. “And I…I think I really want kids.” She looked especially thoughtful, like there was a lot more she wanted to say but was holding back for the moment. “Do…do you?”

You took a breath and smiled. “I do,” you said. “I want to make us even more of a family. And I want to raise kids who are happy and loved and safe no matter what.”

Holtzmann sprung forward to hug you so hard you fell flat on your back on the couch. You squeezed back like your wife was the only thing in the world.

It took a few months of deliberation before the enormity of the decision you were making sunk in. You and your doctor agreed that busting ghosts and building nuclear equipment were far from optimal conditions for pregnancy, and for once Holtzmann didn’t protest, so you would be carrying the baby. When you called to make your first clinic appointment, Holtzmann was as excited as you (and possibly more nervous), so you sat together at your kitchen table with the phone on speaker, gripping each other’s hands. She was just as involved at the actual appointments, hardly ever taking her hand off your shoulder or elbow, asking more questions than you ever could have thought of, and referring to you as “my wife” much more than was strictly necessary for clarity alone. Your doctor and the nurses at the clinic took to you two quickly and seemed genuinely invested in helping you start your family.

After your second try, your period was missing in action and you found yourself getting sick over the toilet for the third day in a row. Holtzmann was once again holding back your hair and rubbing your back while you knelt and retched. “Sorry,” you groaned when you were done.

“I’m just relieved you’re not puking slime,” Holtzmann joked as she dabbed at your forehead with a cool cloth. She helped you move to sit on the edge of the bathtub. “Also, never apologize to me again, ‘kay?”

You smiled weakly but happily. “Deal,” you said. “I don’t want to jinx it or anything, but I…I really think I might be pregnant this time. Can you get the tests?”

Holtzmann nodded emphatically, looking too overwhelmed to speak, and sprinted out of the bathroom. She returned with the pregnancy tests you’d purchased a few weeks earlier still in their bag from the pharmacy. Your hands shook as you opened the box and glanced at the instructions. Holtzmann rummaged through the bathroom cabinet and babbled conversational nonsense, overflowing with energy, while you glamorously peed on a stick.

Your hands shook as you looked at the indicator. “I am,” you said, equally ecstatic and terrified. “I’m pregnant. Oh my god, I’m pregnant!”

Holtzmann let out a whoop and took the test from you to see it with her own eyes. “YES!” she shouted. “Operation Holtz and (Y/N) plus one is a go!” She grabbed your face in both hands and smothered it in kisses. You felt dizzy. Unable to contain herself, Holtzmann danced out of the bathroom, punctuating her movements with victory cries. As you rose to follow her, you heard her throw open the window to the street and scream down to whoever was there, “My wife and I are having a baby!” You faintly heard someone shout back, “Congratulations!”

You laughed so hard at that you started crying. Holtzmann was soon wiping away some tears of her own and wrapped her arms around you, resting her forehead against yours. “I love you and that little bundle of miracle cells so much,” she said.

As hard as it was to resist, you and Holtzmann held off on telling the rest of the team for a while. You were pretty sure that by the time you made the big announcement, they already knew something was up; Holtzmann had hauled all of the dangerous equipment she still had in the apartment to the firehouse, you’d had a handful close calls while looking at maternity and nursery supplies on your laptop, and Patty had made a few pointed comments about your sudden avoidance of caffeine and alcohol. When you did formally tell the group, it was a very happy day at the firehouse, and Patty only said some variant of “I knew it” or “I told you so” a dozen times. Abby instantly decided that she would have a mini Ghostbusters uniform onesie made for the baby, and you left that day laden with handbooks and pamphlets that Erin had gone out to buy for you. (Kevin was extremely concerned about how you could be pregnant, so Holtzmann had a thrilling conversation with him about the wonders of modern gynecological medicine.)

The weeks seemed both to fly and crawl by. One of the books Erin had given you gave a detailed description of each stage of fetal development, which particularly fascinated Holtzmann. She took to reading these aloud to you and then pretending to hold a microphone to your belly. “Ma’am, is it true that you now have eyelids? Can you tell us how you feel about that?” she’d ask.

You laughed and pretended to listen hard. “She says it’s still really dark,” you said. “Also, she wants ice cream.” Holtzmann immediately went to grab a tub of Ben and Jerry’s and two spoons.

You wished someone had taken a picture of Holtzmann’s face when you had your first ultrasound. “Look at that little bean,” she said softly. “That’s our kid.”

Your chest felt tight with joy and love as you looked between the baby on the screen and Holtzmann: this was your family.

Holtzmann was a model partner. (All of your nurses, and eventually, the instructor at your childbirth class, said so.) She looked after all of your aches and pains, somehow managed to keep track of all of your appointments and drive you to all of them, never made a peep about your mood swings, and did all of the literal and figurative heavy lifting when it came to preparing for the baby. The spare room in your apartment had been cleared out and converted into a nursery. Holtzmann painted the room from top to bottom with a mural that started in one corner with the layers of the earth, then showed the rock cycle, cross-sections of the growth of plants, the water cycle, basic taxonomy of animals, a number of the elements, and zoomed-in sections of everything revealing cells, atoms, and crystal structures. Up towards the top of the ceiling different types of clouds and weather were shown under the atmosphere, which gave way to a stunning portrait of the solar system and beyond across the ceiling. When you walked in after a day at work and saw Holtzmann standing on a ladder in the middle of the room like Michelangelo, her face and clothes spattered with paint as she put the finishing touches on the sun, you were overwhelmed and started crying. You rushed to reassure her that this was the good kind of pregnant-crying.

When the baby really started moving, Holtzmann would lie down with you with a hand on your growing belly and help you keep track of the movements. If you deplored your changing body, she would kiss both you and your belly soundly and tell you that you were more beautiful than ever.

“I feel like a manatee,” you groaned one evening as you sat in the bath between Holtzmann’s legs. She was washing your back for you, occasionally pausing to doodle pictures, equations, and words in the suds.

“Even if you did look like one, manatees are adorable and majestic,” Holtzmann pointed out. You felt her trace a heart on your shoulder blade. “You’re more like a gibbous moon. Or a…or an artisan light bulb. Or something else round and glowing and beautiful.”

“You should write love poetry,” you said. “How are you like an artisan light bulb? Let me count the ways…”

“Hey, don’t knock a good Edison light bulb. I could have compared you to a dust mote orb.”

As you reached the final weeks of your pregnancy, you spent more and more time resting at home, and Holtzmann stayed with you as much as she could. You noticed that she’d been volunteering for fewer potentially dangerous busts lately, unless the whole team was on call and she was needed, and that she’d been taking fewer risks overall. When paranormal emergencies did call her away, you were always relieved to hear her key once again turning in the door and her hearty “Honey, I’m home!” If you had ever taken her safety for granted before, you never would again.

Quiet days together at home were your favorite. While you sat and rested your sore feet and aching back, Holtzmann would sit on the floor near you and tinker away. During this time, she built a Rube Goldberg machine entirely out of soft and non-toxic materials (and no small parts) that could be rearranged in a number of ways and still work, an incredibly well-balanced mobile based on her favorite isotopes, and a set of wind-up toys that she said would only break if the baby got her hands on something as destructive as a metal pipe.

“I say we steer clear of things that dangerous until elementary school at least,” you laughed.

“I knew you’d be the strict mom,” Holtzmann said, shaking her head.

“What were you planning on making next, Baby’s First Blowtorch?”

“C’mon, we have to employ a reasonable amount of Addams Family parenting,” Holtzmann said. She was mostly joking, you hoped.

“Hmm. I suppose that makes you Gomez…”

Holtzmann wiggled her eyebrows. “Cara mia.”

“Okay, fine. But I refuse to name this child either Wednesday or Pugsley,” you said.

On one of these mellow domestic days, you felt your first mild contractions. You knew it would be a while until things got serious, if this was even true labor yet, so you didn’t say anything at first to avoid hysteria on either of your parts. You were puttering around the kitchen to distract yourself from the occasional pains when you were surprised by a gush of fluid from between your legs. You realized what had just happened and had to grip the counter for support. You took a deep breath and called to Holtzmann in the next room.

“Jillian?” you said, raising your shaking voice. “My water just broke.”

Holtzmann let out a yell like someone was manhandling an unstable piece of equipment. You just barely heard her mutter to herself, “Okay, Holtzmann, stay fucking calm,” as she scrambled to her feet and dashed to the kitchen. She reached out to support you, and you noticeably relaxed at her touch. “Have you been feeling any contractions?” she asked. You nodded. “For how long?”

“What time is it?”

“Almost noon.”

“About four hours,” you said, “but really far apart.”

Holtzmann let out the breath she appeared to have been holding. “Let me know when they start getting regular and I’ll start timing them, okay? Hey. Hey, now. You and the baby are going to be fine. I’ve got you.” She hugged you gently and pressed a firm kiss to your forehead.

You took a long, shuddering breath. “Okay. Right. We’re doing this.”

Later that afternoon, your contractions started ramping up and you grabbed Holtzmann’s arm so hard you probably left a bruise. While she timed them on her watch and coached your breathing with scientific precision, you decided it was time to head to the birthing center. Holtzmann kept an arm around you, rubbing your back soothingly, while she called back to the firehouse.

“Kev! It’s Holtzmann.” She kept her tone light, but you could tell it was an effort to do so. “Can you put Abby on? Yes, give Abby the phone. Everything’s fine. (Y/N)’s in labor and–Kevin, stop yelling. Let me talk to Abby. Good boy.” She gave you an encouraging smile. “Hi, Abby. Quick favor. Can one of you bring the Ecto around to our building? Baby ‘Buster is on the way. Yes! Yup, style and sirens.” You could faintly hear Abby and maybe a few others talking animatedly on the other end of the line. “Psh, screw the feds. Hmm? Oh, I’ll call you again later. You’re the be-est,” she sang. “Bye-bye.”

Your stylish ride to the hospital showed up tout de suite. Anyone who got vaguely in the way on your short trip down to the street from your apartment got the “Move, my wife’s in labor” treatment from Holtzmann (a privilege which she seemed to enjoy exercising a little too much). The whole team had shown up with the Ecto to see you off, and after receiving hugs, encouragement, and see-you-laters from everyone, Holtzmann helped you into the passenger’s seat, hopped into the driver’s side, and sped off. She managed to get some laughs out of you despite your mounting pain with well-timed use of the still-illegal siren.

An understandable amount of dread set in when you pulled up to the birthing center. Holtzmann turned off the car and grabbed your hand. “All of your training has led up to this moment,” she intoned, getting another laugh which turned to a pained groan as another contraction hit. Holtzmann immediately stopped and counted through it with you. “Okay?” she said when it passed. You nodded. “Let’s go.”

Eight harrowing hours later, throughout which Holtzmann never left your side for more than a necessary minute or two despite all of the screaming, nausea, and a few accidental punches, Ada Lise Holtzmann was born shrieking and safe in the wee hours of the morning. Trembling, spent, but overwhelmingly happy, you lay in bed with your baby in your arms and your wife right there next to you.

“She’s perfect,” you whispered. You couldn’t stop drinking in her tiny features, her little sounds, her heat and weight against your body.

“She is,” Holtzmann agreed. “You have to admit she looks kind of like an alien, but she’s perfect.”


“Sorry, sorry.” She pressed tender kisses to your cheek and the baby’s forehead. “Ada, your beauty is otherworldly.”

Patty, Abby, and Erin were the first to visit with food, flowers, and congratulations. As reluctant as you were to let go of the baby, you and Holtzmann gratefully ate while the team said hello to their newest, miniature member.

“She looks so alert for a newborn,” Erin observed, holding her gingerly.

“She’s gonna be an infant prodigy, calling it now,” Patty said.

“Gonna start her off on science early, Holtz?” Abby asked.

“She can do anything with that brain of hers that she wants,” Holtzmann said, taking Ada back from Erin.

“But yes, her room is science-themed,” you said.

“Okay, kiddo, lesson one,” Holtzmann said, cradling your baby and looking her straight in the eye. “Everything in the universe–the universe!–is made up of these teeny-tiny building blocks called atoms…”

frankenst-ein-deactivated201607  asked:

But it's not a human being yet, it's a fetus.

Fetus is a stage of development, not a species. Every mammal species has a fetal stage. So there are dog fetuses, dolphin fetuses, cat fetuses, monkey fetuses…and human fetuses.

Human fetuses are human beings at the fetal stage of development. They are alive (growing, metabolizing, developing), human (coming from the combined DNA of two human parents), whole (containing all the information and genetic material necessary to grow and develop), and self-directed (on their own developmental path, directing their own life functions and growth).

Human fetuses are, biologically speaking, individual members of the human species, otherwise known as human beings. Since all human beings have inherent rights, abortion is a fundamental violation of human rights.

Apparel Previewer WIP

First put together coding of a apparel previewer. I don’t know how long it will take me (my knowledge of coding is limited). It looks kinda clunky but I hope to improve on that as I go along and learn more. These are the features I’m hoping to have when I finally release it:

  • Ability to import user dragons/images
  • Layered apparel
  • Automatically sets dragon’s breed and gender
  • All apparel slots, with indicators on which one’s need to be purchased

Right now it’s at its fetal stage. Still a long way to go…

Note: Images will not be hotlinked.

qejesuiti  asked:

Hi, I am Erica! How are you? :) I am a game developer and I and my team are currently working on a latest game. We would like to ask you a favor. Can you test it out and see how it works? Will take ONLY few seconds! Would appreciate your opinion and feedback. Try it on my Tumblr. Thank you very much darling, tell my how it was we can chat later!! Erica :)*~

Shin Megami Tensei: Nocturne, known in Japan as Shin Megami Tensei III: Nocturne (Japanese: 真・女神転生III-NOCTURNE HepburnShin Megami Tensei Surī Nokutān?) and in Europe as Shin Megami Tensei: Lucifer’s Call, is a post-apocalyptic role-playing video game for the PlayStation 2developed by Atlus in 2003. It is the third main game in theShin Megami Tensei series, released nine years after Shin Megami Tensei II due to difficulties in making a new game in the series able to appeal to the wide audience. The western release of this game is the director’s cut version from Japan from 2004 which added new features such as more bosses, and another ending. Another version of the game was released in Japan in 2008.

The story takes place in modern Japan where the player character is a high school student who becomes half human half demon being when the world starts going through Conception: the current world is destroyed and is set to be replaced with another and currently it has become Vortex World mainly inhabited by souls and demons. As the protagonist becomes a half demon, the player can use him in battle to fight enemy demons and request them to join his side. As the story progresses, the player is given the option of changing the Vortex World based on the decisions he takes.

The project of Nocturne was constantly delayed after the release of Shin Megami Tensei If due to Atlus’s desire to make a proper Shin Megami Tensei game for its next generation of consoles which resulted in the game going through several changes. The game was well received by video game publications who praised its gameplay and atmosphere while its challenging difficulty was often a subject of criticism. It has often been recognized as one of the best video games released in the west during 2004 while in Japan it sold 245,520 units in its debut year. A drama CD and light novel based on the game have also been released in Japan.


In Nocturne the player controls a teenager who viewed from third person camera. The main character gains demonic skills through the use of Magatama. When a hero levels up and is equipped with a Magatama, he may learn a skill and the Magatama may go Wild. After leveling, the Magatama may go Wild. This will be a random effect such as healing or stat boosts. There are also bad effects such as getting negative status ailments.

A unique facet of Magatama is the ability to alter the main character’s “Title”. The area where a demon’s race (or family) is listed, the main character’s is “Fiend” by default; however, through mastery of some Magatama, this title changes. For the main character, however, it isn’t his race changing, but merely his title, as he is regarded as the story’s Fiends (though he is half one) regardless of the title. All Magatama are affiliated with one of three types: Dark, Neutral, and Light. As the main character masters Magatama, the type he has mastered the most of is selected as his title. For the most part, the main character’s title is cosmetic and does not affect gameplay


The battle system functions like traditional RPG turn-based combat, but with one key exception: Nocturne introduced a new element in the form of Press Turns. Each character participating in combat, friend and foe alike, provides one or more Press Turns (more usually denoting a boss) represented in the upper right-hand corner of the screen as icons. The rule behind this system is that any action, such as attacking, using skills, items, contacting demons and summoning commands, will normally cost one full turn. But if a combatant scores a critical hit, exploits their opponent’s weakness, or passes on making an action, their turn will be considered ‘half used’, which is marked by a pulsating Press Turn icon. These half used turns allow a character to do anything that a regular turn can but will always expire, even if a “half turn” option is again selected. If an attack fails (either by missing, repelling, draining, or blocking,) however, it will penalize the combatant by losing multiple Press Turn icons.

Demon conversation

A key theme in Nocturne is that of demon conversation. Since the Demi-fiend can only (normally) have one press turn by himself, he must gain allies to fight alongside him in order to have a better chance of survival. Leveling up particular Magatama can also affect demonic conversations with particular demon types. Demon negotiation is a unique system in which the speaker (usually, but not always, the Demi-fiend) tries to persuade an enemy demon to join their party.[3]

Some demons can be bribed with money or items, while others may only ask a philosophical question (“Do you envy how plants live?”). Some can be seduced by a beautiful speaker, some can be flattered, and some will join you without a moment’s hesitation. These demons can also be fused to create stronger creatures and the state of the moon or “Kagutsuchi” can provide stronger creations.[4]


The main character and his friends, Chiaki Hayasaka and Isamu Nitta, go to Tokyo to visit their ill teacher Yuko Takao just as a riot caused by two cults resulted in the death of several people.[5] In the hospital where Yuko was staying, the main character briefly encounters a sinister occult experimentation set by a man named Hikawa who is connected with the riot.[6] Shortly afterwards, the world starts going through Conception; thanks to Hikawa’s experimentation, the original Tokyo is destroyed and replaced with an embryonic state, the Vortex World, which is to remain until the world is reborn.[7] The main character then meets a young boy who inserts him the Magatama, a creature that gives him demonic powers and turns him into a “Demi-Fiend.”[8]

As the main character explores the Vortex World, he allies with Jyoji Hijiri, a reporter who guides him in the Vortex World.[9] He learns of two organizations who wish to shape the new world up to their desires: the Assembly of Nihilo led by Hikawa who aim to create a world devoid of emotion in order to ensure peace, and the Mantra who want to rule the new world through strength.[10][11] The Demi-Fiend is confronted by several demons who wish to obtain candelabrums as a means to obtain more power.[12] Hikawa manages to destroy the Mantras in his quest to rule the new world.[13] He is assisted by Yuko Takao who manages to steal the energy, or “Magatsushi”, from other demons.[14]

The Demi-Fiend goes in search for his friends and faces the groups. Both Chiaki and Isamu are distraught by the Vortex World and decide to move on their own rather than relying on their friend’s power.[15][16] As Yuko realizes she is being used by Hikawa, she decides to go on her own quest to create her desired world.[17] For this, she aims to create three Kotowari (Reasons). For a person to create the new world, they must possess a powerful inner philosophy that encompasses a set of natural laws that the new world would be based upon: this is called a Reason. The laws of the Vortex World dictate that it is forbidden for a demon to create a Reason; thus, most demons in the game follow one of the three Reasons created by key characters throughout the course of the game.[18] The Vortex World is merely a fetal stage of the world, created by the Conception in preparation for its eventual rebirth.

The Reasons are Hikawa’s Shijima, based on stillness and oneness, for a world of perfect harmony, where there is no 'self’ whatsoever, and no passion to cause dissent, conflict and destruction; Isamu’s Musubi, a Reason where the Self is absolute and every single person would live in his or her own independent world, completely sealed from any other living being; Chiaki’s Yosuga, a Reason based on elitism and survival of the fittest, where only the chosen elite would possess the right to live while useless and weak elements of society would be purged from the world, leaving only the powerful and strong.[19] While Yuko also tries to create her own reason, she ends being sacrificed by Hikawa during his summoning of his chosen deity.

As a demon, the main character is forbidden to create his own Reason. However, he can choose to defy the laws of the Vortex World and follow no Reason, which leads to the Neutral Light which restores the world to the way it was before the game.[20] The Neutral Dark Ending has the Demi-Fiend as the only survivor.[21]Additionally, there is a dark ending By completing the optional Labyrinth of Amala dungeon in the Maniaxversion of the game, a sixth ending- 'True Demon’- can be gained instead where Lucifer succeeds in shaping the main character in his image to help mount an attack on heaven.[22]

Dead bird flower pot

“Do you ever want to reach straight into a boy’s chest cavity and rip his heart out?”

“Not exactly.” Juvia replied from her perch on the windowsill. “I’ve got jail-time planned for my late thirties.”

“Oh, doth love I fear is woe.” Lucy said, as she theatrically fell back onto the bed with an arm flung over her face.

Juvia got up with a huff and moved to sit on the bed with her melodramatic friend. Oh well, Juvia couldn’t blame her. She had probably been like that too when she was crushing on other guys. She inwardly shuddered when she remembered Bora.

But this was Lucy. Smart and beautiful and strong Lucy. And here she was lying on Juvia’s blue damasked bed, her tears looking like stars.

“What happened?” She pressed her fingers into Lucy’s soft blond hair.

“We were at the bridge on the bench. You know the one with the bench overlooking the river.”

Juvia hummed in acknowledgement, her fingers tangling through the blond locks.

“Well we were just talking, and eating the crepes from Mira’s bakery, and it was really nice and peaceful.”


“Then he kissed me, and it was by the river and he even gave me flowers afterwards, so I actually thought it was genuine.” She heaved a breath. “Then I was squirted in the face by a fake flower hidden in the bouquet I think, and do you know what he said?”

Juvia looked closely at Lucy, and what she had thought before was tears that had smudged her makeup, could’ve actually been water. Well probably both.

“20 points to Natsu. Can you believe it?” She whispered.

Juvia shook her head. “Lucy why don’t you just end it?”

The “it” she was referring to was the prank war their group of friends had been playing since fourth grade. The boys used to go particularly hard at it too, but they had all outgrown it by the beginning of eighth grade. Only Lucy and Natsu had kept it alive all those years, and now it was the second semester of Junior year, and the two of them had only made the game more intense when Lucy had kissed him on impulse and played it off as a prank.

“You should tell him why you really kissed him that day, Lucy”

“I can’t! This-this is the only way I’ll be able to be with him like this. This is the only way.”

Juvia didn’t say anything and watched her curl up on her side into the fetal position. Lucy had put herself in this situation, and even Natsu could be pitied too, but these were Juvia’s friends and damn if she didn’t want to get revenge at Droy for growing a flower in her dead bird’s carcass and giving it to her for her 11th birthday , so she decided she was going to get Natsu and Lucy together and she was going to avenge Raindrop, her dead bird.



The next Thursday she gathered as many of her friends (excluding Lucy and Natsu) that could be bothered to spare the time, and huddled them all into the auditorium after school.

“I’m thinking of bringing back the prank wars.” She announced.

“That is a stupid fucking idea. Do you have any ide-”

She threw her empty water bottle at Gajeel, and rephrased; “Nevermind. Let me say that again. I’m bringing back the prank wars and,” she glared at Gajeel. “And that counted as 5 points.”

“But why do you even want to do this?” Levy asked from the first row.

“Yeah, don’t we have enough going on already? We don’t have time to be playing games any more, Juvia.” Drawled Laki as she picked at her nails.

“I don’t really understand the meaning of this.” Mumbled Kinana. “This is a wild idea.” Added Droy. And on and on it went. One person’s voice drowning out the other, until Juvia’s own inability to hear her own thoughts caused her to snap, and make her throw her yellow pencil at Gajeel.

“Why do you keep doing this to me?!” He sputtered, but Juvia ignored him, and shouted, “Have you all stopped thinking about yourselves, and paused to wonder why I’m even returning such an outdated game?”

“You have a point.” Rustyrose murmured, hand on his chin, and looking like every megane anime villain in the entire world-well he would have if only he didn’t have that god-awful mullet. Who even has a mullet in this day and age, she thought.

“Why have you called us here then, Juvia?” Inquired Erza.

“Well you know we stopped playing that game a long time ago, but there are two people who haven’t.”

“Natsu and Lucy!” Levy said as the realization of what Juvia was trying to do dawned on her.

“We don’t actually have to actively participate. I honestly don’t want to be called "Stinky Avocado” for another year. But I do want to get those two idiots to stop hurting each other, so I’m putting Operation-Prank-Wars-Revival-Is-Secretly-Get-Natsu-And-Lucy-To-Bang!“ She finished, out of breath.

"Well Mira says she likes the plan,” Lissana held her phone up as if Juvia could see their texts from up upon the stage. “She says that youth is so refreshing, and that she will cut off your arms, Juvia, if you try to take her spot as matchmaker.”

Cobra just scoffed from beside her, and got up to leave. Whatever, Juvia told herself that she didn’t even need him anyways.

“I for one am all for this plan!” Levy shouted and stood up, “I don’t want to see Lucy sad anymore.”

“I agree.” Said Erza. And slowly one by one everyone else voiced their affirmations.

Only Gajeel remained, but Juvia flicked another pencil at him without even blinking, and he finally relented after an indignant “ouch.”

As everyone left Juvia picked her bag up from the stage, and proceeded towards the exit, when megane mullet stopped her in her tracks.

“I really think this is a waste of time that’s all,” he said, shrugging his shoulders.

And as he turned his back towards her, Juvia thought “hey, didn’t he graduate two years ago?”

The next day Lucy hurried up to her, and engulfed her in a hug. “Hey I heard that about what you did, and I wanted to thank you for supporting me.” She beamed. “But you may want to avoid butter and avocados this time around.”

I wrinkled my nose and nodded, remembering the incident, but also wondering if she knew about my secret plan.

“Yeah, so who told you?”

“Oh, levy told me last night, that you were all going to start playing again, to make me feel like I’m not alone. And she told me that you came up with the idea yourself! Thank you. Honestly, Juvia.”

I shook my head, “No problem.” Glad that Levy hadn’t told her the truth.

“Well then see you at lunch!”

Juvia absentmindedly murmured “Bye”, and headed off to her first period.

Later in the morning, happy with the success of her plan’s fetal stages, Juvia walked on towards to lunch. Even calc homework couldn’t bring her mood down. That was, until she stumbled upon the scene in front of her.

Lucy, her arms around Loki’s neck, and she was kissing him furiously.

When she broke away from him and saw Natsu standing, like a rigid slab of wood in front of her, she smiled and ran up to him. “Hey Natsu, everyone’s playing now. Won’t that be even more fun? I wonder how many po-”

But he turned around and walked off before she could finish her sentence.

Juvia would have almost felt bad for Lucy if that wasn’t such a dick move. The simmering pot of rage within her stomach also extended to Loki. And she hated the playboy more in that moment than she ever had, even when he’d pushed her off the jungle gym in second grade.

She turned to run after Natsu, feeling incredibly guilty about what happened. “Natsu,” She grabbed his shoulder after almost running over a couple of freshman in the school’s halls.

“You know what?!” He shouted suddenly turning around to face her, causing her to stumble back a few steps. “I guess I really am glad that Gray is coming back Sunday. Someone I get to beat up.” The he left her alone in the hallway.

Juvia felt numb. Gray was coming back?

Hey, so yes, I’m doing a multichap highschool au with all pairings, but chapter two isn’t coming out until I get some revieeeeeews!

Can’t believe I wrote this in four hours lol.

Dedicated to @umjustkatie hope you get over your writers block

anonymous asked:

what do i say to someone who says that a fetus is a clump of cells?

So are they. So are you. So am I. Saying someone is a clump of cells doesn’t refute that they’re a human organism.

What makes the difference is coordinated function. if you cut off my finger, the cells in it will no longer be able to function together (being cut off from the central nervous system and the cardiovascular system) and will die. My finger cells cannot coordinate their own function together apart from the rest of my body. 

A human embryo such as a zygote, morula, or blastocyst may look like just a clump of cells (or, as with the zygote, only one). However, these “clumps of cells” can coordinate function on their own and direct their own development. The zygote does not need to be told by someone else to grow and divide. It tells itself to do that. The blastocyst cells coordinate with each other and continue to grow and divide without any outside information or direction. All they need from the outside is nutrition and oxygen, just like us larger humans.

Now, these early embryos don’t have a central nervous system or a cardiovascular system. And they don’t need one. Both of those systems are only necessary for us because we, having a lot of cells, need them to distribute information, nutrition, and oxygen. 

A single person or a small house or even a small village doesn’t need a phone system. They are close enough that it’s easy to go find the person you need and talk to them. They also don’t need a superhighway to distribute resources.

A large city will need a phone system, as people are further apart and harder to find if they’re not where you expected them to be. They’ll also need some major roads, maybe even a highway to move people and resources across town.

A state or country will need a phone system and not only a highway, but an interstate to connect the cities and towns.

Both our central nervous system and our cardiovascular system help our cells coordinate by sending messages (hormonal messages travel in our blood). Our cardiovascular system also transports nutrients and oxygen to those cells. 

The human embryo doesn’t develop a cardiovascular system until 18-22 days after fertilization, and he or she doesn’t develop a central nervous system until about 6 weeks after fertilization. The lack of those systems doesn’t mean they’re not human or not a human being. It just means they’re not big enough to need them.

The person who says a fetus is just a clump of cells should also know that the fetal stage doesn’t begin until the 9th week after fertilization, at which point the fetus has a head, a brain, eyes, ears, a mouth, an early nose, a torso, arms, legs, fingers, toes, a beating heart, and a functioning cerebral cortex.

This image is from the University of New South Wales Embryology online education and research website. This picture is from the stage immediately before the fetal period begins. So this would still be considered and embryo.

Clearly, this is not the clump of cells the person you talked to was picturing. Yet even a “clump of cells” like this: 

This is a morula, on day 3 of his or her development.

Is still a living, growing human with coordinated function. Those cells are working together without any outside direction. In fact, at this point, the embryo has not even implanted and is having no direct contact with the mother. This embryo could live outside the mother’s body in a laboratory right now (even though the best place for him or her is traveling down the fallopian tube on the way to the uterus, where he or she needs to implant in order to develop past the first week). 

No, this little guy (or girl) isn’t as cute and cuddly as he or she will be at 8, 15, 20, or 40 weeks. But our human rights aren’t based on our appearance our how cuddly we are. They’re inherent from our humanity. And this “clump of cells” is human. 

Attention Pro-Life blogs of Tumblr

Let’s ask Cecile Richards a few questions.

  • When do you think human life begins?
  • Are you aware that a fetus’ heart starts beating at 8 weeks post conception?
  • Do you want there to be more abortions, or less? Why?
  • What do you have to say about Planned Parenthood’s numerous sex abuse scandals?
  • What do you think is the reason for Planned Parenthood’s disproportionate placement of abortion clinics in minority communities?
  • Are you aware that Planned Parenthood clinics do not actually perform mammograms?
  • Do you believe abortions should be safe, legal, and rare? Why do you give awards to clinics for performing an exceeding number of abortions?
  • Why do you fight against even a bare minimum of safety measures placed on abortion clinics to protect women?
  • What do you have to say about the fact that Planned Parenthood performs 149 abortions to every adoption referral? Do you think this conflicts with your statements about “safe, legal and rare”?
  • Are you willing to condemn the clinic workers caught lying to pregnant women about their child’s stage of fetal development?
  • Did you know that abortions are literally never necessary to save a woman’s life?
  • Are you willing to publicly condemn the actions of Kermit Gosnell? If so, on what grounds?
  • What do you have to say about the wrongful death of Tonya Reaves from poor clinic practice?
  • How much of Planned Parenthood’s revenue comes from abortion? The Weekly Standard calculates it at at least 1/3 but I just wanted to be sure.
  • How do you sleep at night?


I was talking to my mom this morning (a baby boomer who taught me to be pro-choice). The other day she saw my video on abortion, I was using it to explain to my 5 year old the stages of fetal development, and it prompted a discussion about her experiences with abortion.

She started having abortions very soon after Roe vs. Wade was passed. She had a lot of adverse reactions to the birth control used at that time, so she was using abortion as a form of birth control. In my abortion video I talk about how the main feeling people feel now after abortion is a sense of relief. Back in her day, this was not her experience. This was in big part due to the fact that this was the time that proper abortion procedure was being developed, and like the birth control of the time, the side effects and treatment could be incredibly traumatic. This got me thinking about the evolution of abortion procedure and how this related to the current political climate. Because abortion is being heavily regulated now and banned and restricted in so many ways we’re going backwards in the quality of care. It made me realize how important the stories of our predecessors are to warn us about how abortion experiences could be if this continues.

So I want to host a new project, but I’ll need your help. I’d like to have interviews of people who got abortions, all the way during the time before, during, and directly after Roe vs Wade to present day in places where abortion is not limited and in places where it is. Interviews would include the process the doctors used, if medications were used to make the process easier and what these medications did, the doctors and staffs treatment and bedside manner, and your physical and mental feelings after the procedure. I believe that this will showcase how abortion has gotten better through the years and also its steady decline in places where it is restricted. 

Please, followers if you have any abortion stories send them to me and let me interview you. If you know anyone who has had an abortion interview them and send those interviews to me. Please signalboost this post. I really would like to showcase this.

anonymous asked:

Fetuses can't feel pain right?

An excellent article on the subject by Katie McDonough from Salon

Fetal pain is a lie: How phony science took over the abortion debate

Since Nebraska first jump-started the trend back in 2010, close to a dozen state legislatures across the country have passed laws banning abortion at 20 weeks. Most of these restrictions are given grave-sounding titles like the “Pain-Capable Unborn Child Protection Act,” or some near-identical riff on the words “fetal,” “pain” and “protection.” All of them, no matter what they’re called, rest on the stated premise that a fetus can experience pain at 20 weeks, and that this is a sufficient justification to ban all abortions after this gestational stage.

But “fetal pain” in the popular discourse is a nebulous concept, one that lawmakers like Jodie Laubenberg, Trent Franks and others haven’t much bothered to define or help ground in available medical evidence.

Probably because there really isn’t any. The limited research used to support such claims has been refuted as pseudoscience by both the Journal of the American Medical Association and the British Royal College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. (Not to mention smaller studies from researchers at Harvard University, University College London and elsewhere.)

“We know a lot about embryology [in the field]. The way that a fetus grows and develops hasn’t changed and never will,” Dr. Anne Davis, a second-trimester abortion provider, associate professor of clinical obstetrics and gynecology at Columbia University Medical Center, and consulting medical director at Physicians for Reproductive Health, told Salon. “And what we know in terms of the brain and the nervous system in a fetus is that the part of the brain that perceives pain is not connected to the part of the body that receives pain signals until about 26 weeks from the last menstrual period, which is about 24 weeks from conception.”

Because the neural structures necessary to feel pain have not yet developed, any observable responses to stimuli at this gestational stage — like the fetal “flinching” during an amniocentesis — are reflexive, not experiential. Which is to say, the fetus at 20 weeks can’t actually feel anything at all. Which is to say, the fundamental justification for these laws is a really big, really popular lie.

“That’s just where the science is. You can have an opinion about that, but it doesn’t change the information,” Davis says. “Science is not going to get the brain to connect faster.” (Neither, it should be noted, will the hoping, wishing or foot-stomping of politicians like Marco Rubio and his anti-choice contemporaries.)

And yet, despite ample research debunking claims about fetal pain, the political narrative arguing otherwise continues to dominate. Facts about embryology and the science of gestational development are often ignored outright or framed as somehow extraneous to the debates taking place, and reproductive rights opponents have been wildly successful in selling these bans as emotional issues — that support for them should come from the gut, not from thick tomes of medical facts.

headless-horsepossum  asked:

I have a vague idea that opossums have pretty close ancestors going pretty far back into prehistory. Do you maybe have some Words about my many-toothed, trash-eating associates? Or ancient marsupials in general, maybe?

All living mammals belong to one of three clades, based on their methods of giving birth to their young.  Members of the clade Prototheria, or “monotremes”, lay eggs; members of Eutheria, or “placentals”, carry their fetal offspring in their uterus until they are fairly physically developed before giving live birth; and members of Metatheria, or “marsupials”, give birth to live young at the fetal stage and carry them in an external “pouch”.  While Prototheria is a very old and primitive group of mammals, Eutheria and Metatheria are believed to have emerged at around the same time.

The oldest known member of Eutheria is Juramaia, a tiny shrew-like animal that lived in China approximately 160 million years ago.  How Juramaia gave birth to its young is unknown; the internal reproductive organs used to classify placentals and marsupials do not typically fossilize, forcing paleontologists to classify extinct mammals based on their skeletal similarities to modern mammals.  However, as all living members of Eutheria are placentals, Juramaia was likely a placental as well.

The oldest known member of Metatheria, Sinodelphys, also lived in China, but lived about 35 million years later than Juramaia (although currently undiscovered older members of Metatheria are believed to have existed).  At the time of this writing, Eutheria and Metatheria are believed to be sister clades that share a common ancestor, one which predates both Juramaia and Sinodelphys, likely dating back to the Early Jurassic period.  Sinodelphys bears an extraordinary resemblance to a modern-day opossum—a ratlike animal that lived in trees, hunting insects and other small prey.  Again, however, it may not actually have been a marsupial; it may have given birth in some other way, but possessed skeletal features that place it within Metatheria regardless.

Based on the location of Sinodelphys’ fossils, Metatheria is believed to have originated in China, but eventually spread through all the continents of the world.  However, shortly after the extinction of the dinosaurs, metatherians died off on all continents except South America and Australia.

The reasons for these metatherian die-offs are not entirely clear.  It was once thought that they were outcompeted by eutherians, but metatherians frequently coexisted with eutherians that occupied similar niches.  (Between you and me, this also strikes me as a bit of anthropocentrism – paleontologists assuming that eutherians, the mammal group to which we coincidentally happen to belong, became dominant by virtue of being naturally “better”.)

Whatever the reasons for their extinctions elsewhere, metatherians did exceptionally well in South America.  The dominant carnivores in South America, from 65 to 3 million years ago, were the sparassodonts – large marsupials that convergently evolved to resemble big cats, such as Thylacosmilus, pictured above.  They competed with the borhyaenids – marsupials that resembled hyenas – as well as terrestrial crocodilians and “terror birds”.

Meanwhile, about 23 million years ago, a different group of marsupials emerged.  Small and unassuming, they lived in the trees, high above their clashing macropredatory cousins.  They belonged to the order Didelphimorphidae, and they were the first true opossums.

Three million years ago, volcanic activity formed the Isthmus of Panama, connecting the two continents and allowing animal and plant life to transfer between the two.  Most South American marsupials went extinct – again, for reasons unclear.  The opossums, however, transferred northward, and became incredibly successful, thanks to their adaptability and ability to eat almost anything.  Today they range from Costa Rica to Canada, in both rural and urban environments.  While their strange South American relatives may be gone, it seems that opossums are here to stay.

Nowhere in the Bible are transgenders condemned. The only argument that can be made is that they are not being as “God intended.” Transgenderness is not as rare as people would like to think, and most definitely neither a choice nor tendency to develop one way or another. We are all ambiguously sexed at the beginning of fetal stage. Hormones are responsible for both our physical and mental sex. Babies are born sometimes with ambiguous genitalia. It happens. A fetus’s sex is developed in the womb. There is scientific proof that transgenders are not “mentally ill” or “confused” or whatever. It’s a real, medical thing. A girl can be born with a penis. A man can be born with a vagina.

We all carry crosses. God does not make mistakes. Some people have heavier crosses to carry than others. You are who you are and you are loved as he created you. Do not use your religion to condemn transgenders. The Bible does say that you are not to judge, and by judging you are not only insulting the person but you are questioning God. Think of that next time you use Christianity as your defense.

i have a lot of thoughts and feelings about how these hyperspecific online lgbt communities may affect the views of teens with very little experience and even their irl interactions and i want to think through them more

when i was a teen, at first i knew few to no lgbt people my own age, even on the internet because social media was a fetal stage then, but as i got involved with my school’s gsa and later other student activist groups (i was a glsen kid) i met other gay and bi kids. in general we got along well. i don’t remember there being a gay vs bi divide at all, in any of these many contexts. which isn’t to say there were never naive biphobic or gay-specific homophobic comments made but it was kinda like low-level, you know? not a whole thing. and i wonder how much it mattered that we were not primed by the internet to see each other one particular way. we were just primed by the broader culture, whose dictates of course we both mistrusted and absorbed wholesale. mostly we were just a bunch of scared kids who knew that, whatever drama inevitably arose in these very charged and angsty spaces, we were there for the same reason, to help ourselves, each other, and other kids in a common struggle.

i can’t, of course, claim that this was what it was like in all irl teen lgbt communities at the time. but this is what i know, based on experiences with groups of kids at local, state, regional, and national levels

and so i wonder about how that compares to teens’ experiences today. i assume that a lot of teens become active on the internet before knowing out lgbt peers irl, like i did. but now when they get online it seems they are more quickly connected to other lgbt kids, and often become connected to community around the specific identity they currently feel fits them. (which is not to say that they’re “too young to know,” just that these assessments often do change.)

if that’s true, at least for some significant number of kids, then how does that affect them? if you take a bunch of bi kids who know few to no irl lgbt peers, and put them together on the internet, especially in a place where they’re aggressively exposed to the ideas of a few influential adults who say gay and lesbian people are awful and they should only listen to or trust other bi people, what will be their assumptions by the time they do find gay and bi peers? similarly, if you take the gay kids and put them in an insular online group of gay kids where biphobic sentiments are unquestioned or even encouraged (possibly also with the influence of adults)? what do both of these groups learn from the online fights they witness between them? if a gay kid and a bi kid who have both had these kinds of experiences meet irl, will they be predisposed to see each other as allies or enemies?

i am certainly NOT concluding that lgbt kids’ access to online lgbt communities is a net negative, since in so many ways it is incredibly important and good! but i do wonder if the specifics of the ways some of these communities are formed and operate cannot cause unexpected harm as well. i can only theorize, but i hope that exposure to certain hyperspecific, hyper-identity-focused communities is not eroding some teens’ ability to trust and ally with each other, and i wonder about it.


Six months pregnant

Feeling good physically and emotionally, except for occasional freak outs about finishing my PhD. Loving this time in the pregnancy where I can still sleep and move comfortably, and don’t have any appointments for a long time. Trying to focus on eating well for bubs despite craving everything that’s bad for me. Taking lots of brisk walks and stretching often. Pretty settled now on wanting a water birth after doing some research, and feeling empowered to power through the pain of childbirth. I thought pregnancy would be laden with a lot more fear but instead I feel like I can trust the experience, my body, and the wisdom of my female ancestors which resides in me. Another week and bubs will have reached ‘fetal viability’ stage and could conceivably live outside my womb. Amazing. I can’t believe we both made it this far.