ferret shaming

Draco: Look, Potter! I’m on this Google thing! I wonder what it says about me?

Harry: Oh?

Draco: Yes! The people love me! LOOK! They have pictures, and—

Harry: What?

Draco: Who.

Harry: What is it?

Draco: WHO. MADE. THIS. 

Harry: Draco, what’s wrong with it?

Draco: What’s wrong with it? WHAT’S WRONG WITH IT????? LOOK. 

Harry: What? What’s wrong? You look amazing!

Draco: LOOK. HARDER. 

Harry: I mean you were a Death Eater. I don’t—

Draco: *points aggressively*

Harry: …oh……

Draco: *dangerously* Ferret, briefly? 

Harry: *very solemn face*

Draco: SPECIES: FERRET BRIEFLY?????

Harry: *the corners of his mouth turn up*

Draco: SHUT UP SHUT UP I AM NOT A FERRET!!!

Harry:  *lets one snicker escape*

Draco: As soon as I’ve finished murdering this Google, you’re next. 

Harry: *gives up and dies laughing* You can’t murder Goo—

Draco: I AM NOT A FERRET AND I CAN DO WHAT I WANT!