fernando socorro

Fui injusto — um pouco — ou excessivo com você. Ma non troppo. Discretamente, enviei sinais de socorro aos amigos. Ninguém ajudou. Me virei sozinho. Isso me endureceu um pouco mais. Não foi só você, não. Foram também pessoas até mais íntimas. Me virei sozinho com enormes dificuldades. Não me lamuriei. Mas preciso que as pessoas saibam que isso doeu — exatamente porque algumas destas pessoas importam para mim.
— 

Cartas – Caio Fernando Abreu

qbnscholar replied to your photo:

Oh my. Love the dark presence. Love the crispness, the composition’s unapologetic symmetrical minimalism that lets all the details stand out even more. Also, do you mean the Soviet will return? That thought just freaked me out.

Thanks, Fernando! It’s one of my first and favourite spots. This stack already starred in Sovietgoner (‘Smoke’). Every visit I pay, I face further state of decomposition. Both photos are now outdated, as this smokestack already shed it’s skin and revealed it’s rusted skeleton. That’s what I witnessed half a year ago, unarmed. I have no idea what state this goner is today. Still, I know I’ll come back to finish second part of 'Studies on decomposition’! People of power want industrial site of this city to regain it’s life. Just like it was during Soviet, when cellulose and viscose were produced intensively. Every citizen who remembers thick smoke and disgusting smell trembles in fear.  ~Matt

qbnscholar powiedział(a): So realistic it makes me think of a movie set.

Believe me Fernando, during my whole trip through this eerie place I felt like on set of some B-class horror movie filmed in Pripyat. I love this feeling and I’ll try to pass this vibe in my work.

In two days I’ll present the whole distorted scenery of this ’movie’, the Outer Ring!

M.

qbnscholar:

Your comments take me be to when I was a kid in Cuba, all those years ago. My present, almost paralyzing shyness is in great part a result of my parents’ fear of the Comite de defensa, the neighbors watching constantly, defending the Revolution.

I’m unable to understand your feelings fully. We both know it’s impossible. I try to do my best though, this is least I can do.

I’m lucky enough to live in free country, among free people. Thanks to everyday sacrifices of many individuals before me I can fulfill myself: love, chase dreams, burn with passion. Thanks to those, who weren’t afraid to ‘get their hands dirty’ I don’t need to choose between honour and good life. I don’t need to protect my dearest from mean gazes. Such dilemma and fear are unknown to me and my generation. Still, I can feel it in your words. For a brief moment I feel way older, that’s mesmerizing. It’s the same as when I press the shutter. For a second I breathe air tasting the same as it used to dozens years ago.

Your childhood memories are very valuable and inspiring, Fernando! I’d love to hear more.