feminism is not what you think it means

Karamel/Supergirl Rant.

A few weeks ago I’d promised myself that I wouldn’t respond to Karamel hate on Tumblr, but I’ve had enough. I’ve seen so many posts about Mon-El being a misogynist, abusive, and toxic (like, WHAT THE HELL???), and recently I’ve seen people pop up here and there and saying that Kara being with Mon-El somehow went against the show’s “feminism”. This even goes to the point of saying that Kara shouldn’t be with Mon-El, a guy she seems to genuinely like, and instead be with Lena when she is obviously straight.

But we’ll come to that later. First, let’s look at what feminism is. Here are the couple of definitions I’ve found online:

the theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes
-Merriam Webster

a range of political movements, ideologies, and social movements that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve political, economic, personal, and social rights for women. This includes seeking to establish equal opportunities for women in education and employment.

any ideology that seeks total equality in rights for women and people who self-identify as women, usually through improving the status of females. Feminism is rooted in ending men’s historical power over women
-Rational Wiki

As you see, feminism isn’t about demonizing men, it is about getting men and women to the same level in terms of rights. Men and women, and all other genders, should be equal in what they are and they aren’t allowed to do/feel/say etc. That in no way means women can’t be with men, that they need to be single if they want to be strong and independent (or be with other women) or being with a man undermines their strength and makes them weak. No. Just no. And that is a really, really unhealthy message to the young girls of the generation.

So, let me make a list of misconceptions about feminism, and let’s go through why it’s wrong to think that:

Women should be single in order to be strong and independent. 
Um, no. Just no. I don’t know what you think strength means, but it certainly doesn’t mean not ever loving someone and being in a relationship. You can still be with a man and be strong and independent. One doesn’t exclude the other. This is such a wrong message to give to girls, making them feel bad for loving someone, making them think that somehow that love is wrong and makes them weak. It doesn’t. Being with a man doesn’t make you dependent on them. You choose to be dependent on them or not. As long as you’re treated equally, as long as you have the say in the relationship as much as your boyfriend/husband does, as long as you want the relationship and you’re happy, it’s more than okay, it’s great

Now how does this ties to Karamel? Well, as far as I can see, Kara is more than happy with Mon-El. I haven’t watched season 1 in a very long time, but I can assure you that I haven’t seen her laugh this much around anyone. It’s seen in her face, you can see it in the way she smiles at/around him. Now how is that a bad thing? Would you really rather Kara feel sad instead of being with Mon-El? HOW IS THAT FEMINISM??? Women have the right to do the things that make them happy, be with people that make them happy, and if Mon-El is that person for her then WHY THE HELL SHOULD SHE NOT BE WITH HIM??? She chose him, right? We saw it in the last two episodes. She wanted to be with him. If she didn’t want Mon-El, the poor boy given her a lot of chances to back down, from accepting just being partners with her to stepping back when he thought she didn’t think they would be a good match. If she truly wanted that, you can bet that Kara would back down, just like she did with Winn, just like she did with James. Are you really so blind to realize that saying that Mon-El forced the relationship on Kara actually UNDERMINES HER CHARACTER? HER CHOICES? You are all obsessed on Kara being a feminism icon, how is her doing WHAT SHE WANTS is going against that? Her actions actually teach girls to be brave about their feelings, to go for what they want. 

Women shouldn’t be with men, they’re bad (but that only extends to white and straight men and not POC/LGBT+, because somehow those things exclude you from that “men” category).
Okay, why? Why shouldn’t women be with men if they want to be with men? Isn’t that, I don’t know, taking away their right? Isn’t feminism about giving women right, allowing them to do what they want? What if I’m straight? What if I want to be with men? Am I not allowed? I just don’t understand this, because as far as I can see, not all men are bad. There are some bad men that you should stay away, that’s true, but that doesn’t extend to everyone. I have many guy friends that respect me, support me, love me for who I am. I don’t have a boyfriend or a girlfriend, but that’s merely because I don’t really like someone right now (that’s a choice as well. If I liked someone, I’d definitely want to be with them). So if Kara likes Mon-El, why shouldn’t she be with her? Just because he’s white and straight? How does that equal to bad? I’m a very pragmatic person, and I can’t really see the logic there. Racism was bad because all humans should be equal, regardless of their skin color, beliefs, etc. Saying that Mon-El is abusive and toxic just because he’s white is also racism. It’s a different kind, but it’s still a prejudice against a certain race. That’s what racism is, right? Here’s the definition:

prejudice, discrimination, or antagonism directed against someone of a different race based on the belief that one’s own race is superior

Now that doesn’t mean that I think Mon-El is perfect. He’s not, not by far. But again, which one of us is perfect? Think about your best friends/boyfriends/girlfriends/family. Are all of them perfect? I’m gonna bet that they’re not. I love my best friend to the moon and back and do anything for her, yet that doesn’t mean I think her every action is right, that she can’t make a mistake. She does make mistakes. But I forgive her, because at the end of the day anyone can make mistakes. I might be angry at what she did, I might not approve it, but that doesn’t mean I’m just gonna leave her for it. I’ll point out that maybe she should’ve done it differently, and she’ll listen to me because she’ll know I want the best with her. Same happens when I make a mistake. I’m saying this because, as I’ve said, Mon-El isn’t perfect. He wasn’t a good person in the past, that is true. He even said it several times. That doesn’t mean he can’t change for good. M’gann had fought for White Martians, slaughtered Green Martians, yet I don’t see anyone accusing her for that, because she’s changed. Why can’t we extend the same courtesy to Mon-El? Why can’t we forgive him as well? It doesn’t make sense. Yes, he’s made mistakes. Yes, I don’t approve all of his actions. I was pretty mad at him when Kara found out he was beating people up for money. I was mad at him when he went after Mxy to fight and kill him. But I forgave him, because he was only human. Had feelings like a human, at least. He was jealous of Mxy. Can you blame him? If you were dating someone, and suddenly this beautiful, talented, and generally perfect person showed up and claimed they wanted to be with your lover, wouldn’t you be jealous? I would be. And it was pretty big of Mon-El to admit that he was jealous because he thought he couldn’t give Kara what Mxy could give her. 

All in all, yes, Mon-El made mistakes. But that doesn’t make him a bad person, just like the mistakes Kara made, the mistakes Barry made or Oliver made doesn’t make them bad people. Barry went back in time and really messed history up, yet I’m sure many people that hate on Mon-El forgave him. Oliver killed many people in the past, yet no one judges him for that. Why is Mon-El so different? 

And also, related to this point about not being with men, should I remind you that in the show Kara is straight? Is that too hard to understand? She never once showed interest to any women, not in a sexual way, except in some people’s dreams maybe? As a bisexual I know what it looks like to be attracted to women. I don’t see that in Kara. Is that a wrong thing? HELL NO! Why the hell being straight the wrong thing? Why the hell is that when people yell “WE SHOULD RESPECT LGBT+ PEOPLE” it’s right & honorable, but when us Karamel shippers point out that Kara is straight (so far) and we should respect her choices as well that we get roasted? Or branded homophobics? Do you people know what you’re talking about? I’m all for LGBT+ couples being represented in TV shows, but not by making an obviously straight character suddenly homosexual, or bisexual. No. Just no. That’s beyond forced. If you want to have a LGBT+ character on your show, then build up to it. Don’t force it down our throats. I don’t see writers taking that road with Kara. And frankly, that’s okay. Being straight is okay, it doesn’t make you a devil incarnate. It’s normal, just as being LGBT+ is normal. It’s not so different.

As a last point, I want to say to all of the people spreading hate and saying that Karamel is racist/homophobic, why are you doing that instead of supporting couples that are LGBT+ or POC? Spreading hate to straight white couples doesn’t earn you anything. Aren’t Iris&Barry dating in the Flash? Isn’t Sara bisexual? Isn’t Alex lesbian? And there’s also the thing between Nate and Amaya in LoT. Why don’t you go support those couples to show your love? Is it so hard to understand that hating on white&straight people actually undermine your cause? We should not promote LGBT+ and POC couples by hating straight and white couples, we should do that by supporting LGBT+ and POC couples. We shouldn’t promote feminism by hating men, we should promote it by supporting strong, independent women. Kara is a strong, independent woman, just like Alex, just like Maggie, just like Sara and Amaya and Caitlin and Iris and Felicity and Thea and more and more people in the DCTV universe. These are women that decide for themselves, that don’t take shit from anyone, that is open to love and relationships but don’t let men control them, that aren’t afraid to say no to the things they don’t want and pursue the things they want… We should support that. 

“Have some self respect” literally has nothing to do with me. It’s about you rating and weighing my behaviour against a 2 dimensional caricature of a women that you think deserves basic decency. I respect myself.

What you mean is “please conform to my personal, rigid beliefs of what I deem acceptable for a woman because it’s up to me to decide who deserves to be treated like a human being or not based entirely on meaningless socialized and sexist values”


I totally understand the whole feminism and equal rights thing and it’s totally awesome that women are finding this confidence within themselves and each other but there’s a serious issue when you’re tearing down one gender to boost your own. Some feminist are fucking insane and just come off sounding like feminazis. I get it you don’t need a man in your life and I totally agree with you, but that doesn’t mean that you should just start saying that “ALL MEN ARE PIGS! ALL MEN SHOULD DIE! ALL MEN ARE USELESS!” because that just means that you’re making no progress for your cause. Once you start spewing hateful and ignorant shit like that it makes me question what you stand for. Everyone should be treated equally, no ifs ands or buts about it, but don’t think just because you think you’re fighting for a good cause that you can just start saying bad shit. It makes you look bad, and it makes the cause look bad. I understand that women need feminism, but do it in a logical and peaceful way.

my ex: i think i’m a lesbian not bisexual

me: that’s cool

my ex: no its not its so hard being gay in this society we’re so hated

me: i mean we have it pretty good these days people are getting more accepting 

my ex: no you don’t get it you’re not gay


I realize I’m probably inviting a debate that I don’t want to get into, but I also feel very strongly about this.

How exactly is the Powerpuff Girls episode ‘Equal Fights’ even remotely controversial? The one with Femme Fatale.

The episode’s thesis is not subtle: Equal rights means equal responsibilities. Using victimization as a shield against criticism only hurts people, including and especially those who are actually victimized.

I understood that when I was a clueless, sheltered child. How do grown-ass adults not get it?

“It was written by men to discredit feminism” - It was written by Lauren Faust, and it explains the need for as well as the complexities of feminism in a way that is accessible to younger viewers without talking down to them. It was my first real look at the feminist movement that wasn’t reduced to a gag or a mean-spirited satire.

It’s also where I learned who Susan B. Anthony was. What? You think the public schools were gonna do that?

“It’s attacking feminists.” - Femme Fatale is not a feminist. Miss Bellum is a feminist. She clearly and succinctly demonstrates the difference to the girls. It is impossible to miss this if you actually watch the episode.

“It takes place in a wonderland where sexism doesn’t exist” - If that were the case then the villain wouldn’t have been able to win the girls over in the first place. For all of her point-dodging and discrediting other women, the point remains that superheroism and supervillainy are male-dominated fields, in and out of universe.

“Real feminists don’t play victim in order to get special treatment:” You’re right, we don’t. That’s what the episode is saying too. What are we arguing about?

I realize that ‘Equal Fights’ came before the more straightforward “No girls allowed” episode ‘Members Only’, and maybe history would’ve been kinder to it if their air dates were switched, but… I’m sorry. I was NOT a perceptive child, folks! It is genuinely baffling to me that there are apparently a large number of people who failed to pick up on these themes in adulthood!

I saw a little girl today who was absolutely riveted by the life in the rotting seaweed around the harbour. I love seeing these little moments, because it takes me back to some of my first experiences as a ‘young naturalist’ of sorts.

I was nearby, photographing and identifying pollinators: I was just about to go over and ask her what she had found…

Both of us had our moments shattered, however, as her mother started screaming at her about getting her clothes dirty. Unfortunately, I also have memories of moments like these, where the female obligation to be decorative trumped my right to be fascinated and curious about the world around me.

She immediately started crying when he parents took her by the arm and led her away.

For those of you who are parents or caregivers, think of what is means to prioritise a child’s appearance over her learning and interests. It’s not fair to socialise girls this way: it breeds self-consciousness, insecurity, and I’m absolutely sure has a direct link to why girls and women are under-represented in the sciences. 

titoramus  asked:

I feel as if modern feminism has lost its roots and now glorifies fat, unhealthy, whore-mongering "women" who riot because they didn't get their exact way. What are your thoughts? Thank you.

Are you really asking me why we’re a bunch of fat, whiny, sluts?

I don’t think feminism glorifies being unhealthy. I would never tell someone it’s awesome to eat nothing but French fries and doughnuts everyday. What feminists want is women of any size (because some people, no matter how active or how healthy they eat, are going to be heavier) to be respected. We don’t want them to be insulted, marginalized, or treated like they’re a sub-human because of their jean size.

I’m also not sure what you mean by “whoremongering” because Webster’s defines that as: “a person who has dealings with prostitutes, especially a sexually promiscuous man.”
What I assume you mean is women who choose to have sex when they want with who they want (like a man does). That I don’t see an issue with. Everyone has their own standards when it comes to sex which include who, how, frequency, and timing.
Everyone, men and women, are entitled to that.

Confused why you wrote “women”. As if we’re not really women because you disapprove of us?

I’m going to guess your last point about us rioting because we didn’t get our way is in reference to The Women’s March.
By saying “not getting our way” you make women (who marched to have rights over our reproductive health and our physical safety) sound like kids who didn’t get to watch the movie they wanted before bedtime.
Women are watching their rights and their safety being chipped away at bit by bit by Republican legislators. States may not be able to overturn Roe v Wade, but they can pass laws that make it nearly impossible for abortion clinics or Planned Parenthood to remain open. Laws like this pertaining to regulating our health and our physical safety are being passed all over the country. That along with the election of a vagina-grabbing misogynist makes us fearful and it makes us mad. In response we exercise our Constitutional right to assemble and to speak against it.

I didn’t answer this ask as soon as I got it because I honestly couldn’t tell if you were being sincere in asking me this question in the way you did. If you are being sincere you should take a moment to reflect on how you asked this and realize how demeaning you sound towards me and women like me. It’s honestly for the very words you chose in this question (whore, fat, “women”) that I feel we need feminism still.

  • ’ I believe if you were dead the world would be a better place. ’
  • ’ You are not my knight in shining whatever. ’
  • ’ I’m not sure we’re worth fighting for. ’
  • ’ I’m gonna eat candy in the dark and pretend I’m home alone. ’
  • ’ Sometimes it’s actually painful to be around you. ’
  • ’ They say if you talk out loud while you look for something, you find it faster. ’
  • ’ This is your love day. ’
  • ’ I’d lose that crazed smile before you start cramping. ’
  • ’ It’s harder to love someone than walk away from them. ’
  • ’ No, I choose me. ’
  • ’ We’re adults, we’re going to fight. ’
  • ’ Everyone said I was ready. You said I would be okay, so I thought I should just do it and get it over with. But I wasn’t ready for…to be… ’
  • ’ I met a puppy once that was half German Shepherd, half teacup Chihuahua. And all I could think was…how did you happen? ’
  • ’ You should go. Cause I’m about to nut punch you. ’
  • ’ Found it. It’s so old, it’s not even in the computer. ’
  • ’ I wasn’t sure what you’d be in the mood for, so I kind of got everything. Champagne, tequila, pinot noir — pick your poison. ’
  • ’ You are not a person who makes promises he doesn’t keep. ’
  • ‘ I only dance it out when something bad’s happened. ’
  • ‘ People aren’t always who you think they are. You learn to see through it. You learn fast. ’
  • ‘ You’re a surgeon, we make mistakes. We need to be forgiven. ’
  • ‘ You don’t teach by shoving someone else’s face in the dirt. That’s just being mean. And small. ’
  • ‘ Did he say anything to you before you killed him? Can you tell me what his last words were. ’
  • ‘ I’m happy and I never thought I would be again. But I am, and that’s all I need. ’
  • ‘ Aw sweetie, this is about me, this isn’t about you. ’
  • ‘ THIS is what feminism looks like, sir. ’
  • ‘ I think you’ll be a good dad. Your babies will be so foul-mouthed and dirty and cute. ’
  • ‘ I am qualified to tell you how to survive. ’
  • ‘ My husband is dead. Yeah, I’m gonna play that card. ’
  • ‘ Why do people constantly feel the need to kill their arteries. ’
  • ‘ Optimism for the win. ’
  • ‘ I told you to keep that baby in. ’
  • ‘ All my orgasms are gonna be self-made, hand-crafted ones. ’
  • ‘ Just because we can live without something, it doesn’t mean we have to. ’
  • ‘ You want to be a mess, be a mess. I don’t care, I can take it. ’
  • ‘ I just got here. I haven’t had a chance to screw anything up yet. ’
  • ‘ Maybe you’ll get lucky and you’ll snip out the part that makes her kinda bitchy. ’
  • ‘ It’s her song, so get off the stage and let her sing it. ’
  • ‘  I love you in a really really big, pretend to like your taste in music, let you eat the last piece of cheesecake, hold a radio over my head outside your window, unfortunate way that makes me hate you, love you. ‘
  • ‘ I’m not good at relationships or talking about stupid feelings. ’
  • ‘ I’m still in love with you. I tried not to be, but it didn’t work. ’
  • ‘  You’re my sister, you’re my family, you’re all I’ve got. ‘
  • ‘ Everyone needs help from time to time. Someone to look out for them. Make sure they’re okay. ’
  • ‘ There comes a point when you have to suck it up and stop whining and start living. ‘
  • ‘ You died in my arms. You freakin’ died. ’
  • ‘ That’s where love exists. In delusional fantasies. ’
  • ‘ Ah, tonight I have things planned that don’t include her screaming your name. ’
  • ‘ I take things personally. I get too emotional. ’

anonymous asked:

What's with people complaining about secondary characters not getting full arcs in acowar? Ship wars aside, Lucien and Elaine weren't gonna immediately fall in love after one 10 minute traumatic interaction in acomaf. Neither were nessian. I get loving the background characters more than the main (ahem Manon>Aelin) but it's unrealistic to expect a ton of development for them in a single pov book. And with FIVE books planned that will focus on those secondary characters?? I just don't get it.

PREACH. I don’t get people thinking a mating bond means romantic love. That’s where my head goes. Especially when we all KNEW at the end of ACOMAF that Elain was engaged and that she refused to leave the human world because of it. 

Like whaaaaat?

I can tell you right now, that if Maas had decided to throw character development, feminism, and good female characters out the window and had Elain and Lucien (cuz this goes both ways LUCIEN DOES NOT LOVE ELAIN) be automatically in love—I’d have made the biggest stink on this platform. I’m saying. That would be so incredibly out of character for Maas as a writer, and it would have been just shit writing. 

I think what happens is that people get lost in the “big story” and forget to apply themselves/basic psychology to the characters. I mean that in a “What would you do?” kind of way. 

I can tell you right now that there is NO. WAY. IN. HELL. I would be accepting of stranger-mate Lucien if I were Elain. Especially not after how they met. 

To put it a different way: If tonight I’m kidnapped by terrifying non-human fae, bound and gagged, taken to a far away castle where people are using magic, and then I’m drown—I literally die—and get dumped onto a cold, stone floor….and the first person who shows me any sort of kindness proclaims that I am his mate/that I belong to him… [insert me slamming my head on the table]

Are you kidding me? You’re kidding me? You’re NOT serious, right? 

Keep reading

STOP asking for more Firefly

STAHP. There is no other way to start this.  I loved Firefly and even more I adored Serenity.  I took the day off school and saw every screening of Serenity that day.  By the end of opening weekend I had seen the film seven times.  Total I ended up seeing that film about 12 times in theaters.  Even more in life.  Firefly was the shit.  Firefly was that thing I couldn’t love more for so long.  

Firefly, as it turns out, has a lot of problems.  Especially if you are a hashtag woke person.  There are really great elements.  The actors live and breathe these characters and if they were to come back to them today those actors could likely embrace those rolls once again.  But like I said, there are a bunch of problems.  

Let’s go with the big one.  Firefly is a big universe about the idea of what if American and Chinese cultures merged.  If after all is said and done, the only cultures that survive moving out to space was American(Mostly white) and Chinese cultures.  So why is it that casual fans don’t know this.  Why is it that most people who know this only know it because someone told them, or because Joss mentioned it in the special features of Firefly’s original DVD set way back in 2003?  

It’s almost as if there is something missing.  Something Key.  Oh, I meant someone.  That someone being FUCKING CHINESE PEOPLE.  You don’t get to just call two characters who are white with white parents the last name Tam.  White Skin is not the mixture of other races.  

Actually, other than Book and Zoe, where are the other people of color?   This is a genuine problem because not only are all of the speaking roles in the show pretty much just white people, so are the background players.  It is really quite strange.  If it was just the core worlds, I’d maybe understand it because the Alliance would definitely support Eugenics, but it is quite the weird situation.  

If you didn’t realize that Book was the magical negro and that Zoe was a stereotypical violent Black Woman, time for you to go to your room and learn about looking at non-white characters in media works.  

I know that a lot of people Love Joss.  They love that he is this self-proclaimed feminist and he’s all about these great female characters.  But he doesn’t like to talk about race.  He doesn’t like to really talk about sexual orientation*.  He doesn’t really like to talk about Trans characters.  I’m not just talking about he as a person, but the works he produces.  And when he touches on any of these subjects, it’s the lightest of touches and it really isn’t a big exploration so much as the media equivalent of click bait.  

Again, look at Firefly.  That is a whole fuck ton of straight characters, and a Bi Sex worker.  Whose Bi-ness only comes up when they want a joke for a male character, and not development for Inara.  But, Inara is a great reason why I’m glad the show never kept going.  Fun Fact:  Joss originally wanted to do a story about a drug that Inara takes.  This drug would kill anyone that rapes the person who takes it.  They were going to have Inara kidnapped by Reavers and when she was found, they would all be dead because of this drug.  Yes, Joss wanted to have the Sex Worker in the future where Sex Workers are super respected gang raped.  He thought this was a progressive and edgey story.  Then again, he set up a future where Sex Workers are respected and everything is done to keep them out of danger, and has the “likable” main character Mal slut shame her at every chance, while he was totally willing to slut around with YoSaffBridge and Nandi.  Again “Progressive”.  

And isn’t it so progressive that they have white people pepper in Chinese into their dialogue only for most of that dialogue just to be nonsensical cursing?  Or very basic thank yous or calling someone sister.  So progressive.  

So everytime you ask for more Firefly you are asking for more of this shit.   Personally?  I want something knew that doesn’t have to live with that baggage.  If Joss really wants to make a scifi feminism show, he needs to learn about TransWomen and including more women of color as leads.  One is not good enough.  

With that said, one of my favorite fan theories is that Firefly, Blade Runner, Alien, and Predator all exist in the same amalgam universe.  


Just because I hate on the fandom and think the creator has a long way to go to get better, doesn’t mean I don’t still have some love for this very flawed work.  

heiraelle  asked:

a quick, (it may sound ignorant, i apologize beforehand) question cause i has a chat w a friend. How did ppl come up with the term feminism? what does it take to be able to label oneself as a feminist? Is it okay to fight for equality, freedom, women's right. why don't ppl use the term 'equalist' instead of feminist? I'm well aware that being a feminist means you fight for equality but i think he's triggered by the word fem. gosh, im so sorry for being uninformed and stupid. Thank you so much.

The word feminism was adopted from a French word “féminisme” in the 1890’s but wasn’t really used widely until the second feminist rights movement in the 1960’s-1970’s.

Feminism is about equal rights and also (and harder to ensure and regulate) the genders being treated equally in society. Technically this could be called “equalism” but since it was females that were originally at such a disadvantage, treated like second hand citizens, and seen as property, it was named after them.

Anyone can be a feminist. You have to believe in equality and choice. The choice part I think is the hardest. It’s hard to accept and like the fact that not everyone will “feminist” the same way as you. A very modest person might think someone who likes showing more skin isn’t very feminist of her and vice versa. But what empowers you isn’t the same for everyone.

I do think some men reject the idea of feminism, even though they might agree with its principles, because it has the word “feminine” in it. If it doesn’t specifically call them out they don’t like it. But… That’s why we need feminism. :)

anonymous asked:

So I'll begin this by saying I'm a straight white guy just so that's out of the way. I really don't understand privilege and was wondering if there was some simple way to understand what it means. I'm not a feminist and I don't think I agree with feminism completely but if you have some time I'd appreciate it

Ok, so instead of defining privilege let’s look at some practical examples.

You and I are both white and the subject of racism comes up… We can opt out of that conversation, we can choose not to have it and not be affected by it.

That is a LOT harder to do when the subject actually involves you.

If you hear two women talking about how they hate men and how men are scum you might have an emotional reaction to that.

If you are a person of colour and you hear racist bullshit your whole life it’s not so easy to just brush off that conversation as it might well impact you, the opinions expressed can affect you and it is likely to get to you emotionally.

We’ll go on to another.

You and I might face hardships in life, they might be AWFUL, we could grow up in poverty and be abused. Maybe we work hard and get out of that situation, it doesn’t mean we didn’t work hard if someone calls us privileged, it means that, for all the obstacles we may have faced there were ones we didn’t have to and there were ways that we were not hindered due to, in this case, our race.

We don’t have to worry about negative bias meaning that people won’t want to hire us or they won’t trust us or they will bring stereotypes to hold against us and try to stop us from achieving our goal.

We have white privilege, it doesn’t mean we are blessed to live a stress-free easy existence, but it means some obstacles are removed.

You and I both live in the real world and, presumably, we have both had to struggle with money and trying to balance our finances. Money would make some of our problems go away… Obviously not ALL of them, but assuredly that would be one less hoop to jump through.

In essence that is what privilege is, your privilege removes a hoop you might otherwise have to jump through.

But having not jumped through that metaphorical hoop, and lived that existence and examples of oppression… We don’t truly understand it. We can try, we can listen and support those who do. But we tend to not do that.

We tend to get annoyed and even aggressive when someone says they had an extra barrier than us and we hear a personal attack when it’s meant as a personal expression.

That lack of experience can lead us to pretending that they didn’t have to jump through any extra hoops, even if they try and explain it, we can dismiss this.

A practical example of this would be when discussions of race come up and we say that someone is “playing the race card” or “using race as an excuse”, it can progress to the point where we actually start talking about it as though they actually jumped through LESS hoops than we did “well, minority scholarships exist and I’m not eligible for one so the world is biased in your favour”.

We will focus on one small thing we believe that is a benefit to oppressed groups and ignore all context… In the above example we would be ignoring the fact that minority scholarships exist to correct an EXISTING problem, because people like us are statically more likely to make it into college even if we scored the same or even lesser grades.

Privilege is a guide for the way the world treats you, why it treats you that way and the possible outcomes this will have for you.

So when people tell you to, say, “check your privilege” they are asking you to examine the biases you have and the benefits you haha likely received without realising it.

It’s a very simple, yet long-winded explanation and I hope it made sense, it’s 10 in the morning and I still haven’t slept so, sorry for any parts that begin to ramble.

anonymous asked:

Okay i m sorry i know it's old af and i m not tryna start shit lmao but i just would like to know why you support the international women day ? Like just know why you think it's good ? I, as a female hate this shit and i think it's a very stupid and hypocritical celebration day


the first c-section to be performed in england was done in the 1880s by a woman…who had to fake her identity as a male to become a doctor. the first astronauts, who were white men, were sent to space by a group of incredibly talented and intelligent black women…who are only receiving praise for it recently. that was in the 1960s. you can thank madame curie for so many of our scientific discoveries. hillary clinton is the reason transgender people can change their gender identities on legal documents, which she didn’t even take any public credit for (y’all still wanna attack her for some “emails”, though, bc she’s clearly “just as bad” as trump…and those “emails” wouldn’t even matter if she was a man, bc mike pence is getting away w/ using his personal email as we speak).

but it doesn’t really matter, right? because asian women still make only 90% of what every man makes…and that’s the highest women:men pay ratio, not even coming close to the ratio between latinas and men, which is nearly 1:2. and how about the double standards? a man who sleeps w/ several women is a stud, a woman who sleeps around is a slut.

how about the fact that the american government wants to take away a woman’s right to abort? how about how our current president is under investigation for the rape of a 13 y/o girl and blatantly believes it’s alright to “grab a woman by the pussy”? that the majority of female (and male) rape victims are terrified to come forward for the fear of being told they were “asking for it” or “lying for attention”, and our society 100% supports it, bc brock turner is a free man?

I could go on for days, but if you think it’s a “stupid and hypocritical celebration day”, you are clearly very ignorant and need to learn some female-appreciation. girls who don’t care about female rights and ambition make me very sad. I don’t think you disliking international women’s day makes you a bad person by any stretch or means, but if you don’t know why we need a day of celebration for women, I am disappointed. but to be honest, I’m even more disappointed that you even have to ask what my opinion on it is.

anonymous asked:

this might sound wild to you, but you can listen to what trans people have to say for once instead of talk over them bc you think your cissexist idea of feminism is better. stop reducing trans women to their genitals. not all trans women have the same genitals. intercourse doesn't need to involve penetration or being fully naked. and your point "95% of gay people dont want to be with someone with genitals they dislike" doesn't make sense: just because something is common, doesn't mean it's good.

I LOVE when ppl pull the ‘um sweaty there are different ways to have sex’ thing bc I don’t?? understand?? what the end goal is here?? guilt lesbians into dating and sleeping with people who both parties know they aren’t actually fully attracted to, forcing them to compromise the way they experience intimacy and forcing one partner to be uncomfortable while the other has to live with the knowledge that their partner is lowkey disgusted by some aspect of their body like???? I’ve come up with a really good idea called let’s all fucking date people who we share a mutual attraction to and let people who don’t want to date us live their damn fucking lives and mind our own business, I can’t even believe that this has gotten to this point you all need to go outside and experience human society bc there is real bigotry in the world and some lesbians not wanting to get with you because they can’t help the inherent way that they experience attraction isn’t it I’m really sorry

Tyger is still at it, saying that a lesbian with a small youtube channel and a Patreon that earns about 400 bucks a month mystically earned her brain tumor for criticizing homophobic straight men who call themselves women like Riley J. Dennis or pedophiles who call themselves agender fairies or whatever like Alok.

She doesn’t call for any violence or harm against anyone. She just dares to ask some pertinent questions about the claims of these men and fails to agree they’re women and more importantly lesbians by whatever vague standards they spout. 

I mean fuck, Riley J. Dennis has a job at Everyday Feminism where he literally promotes gay conversion therapy even while denying that’s what he’s doing in the same breath. But I guess Berns is a piece of shit for calling him out on it.

But really? For “most folks” you wouldn’t celebrate a brain tumor? What the hell has Berns done that Tyger thinks is so bad besides having some people pledge money toward her videos? Which pretty much every content creator on Youtube does these days. 

kink: i tell you i wasn’t born a man and yr behavior towards me changes in no way whatsoever.

i mean, i hope somehow, it made you more comfortable with me as i understand  what it was like to be socialized as a girl, but i do not pretend to comprehend the internalization of the patriarchy between my legs or the push to be cosmetically pretty rather than human. 

xxx SirPup Kingston // 01.01.2017