I’m only about 2.5 weeks post op, and I’m Not supposed to raise my arms anywhere near above my head– but marching with women for women felt like the best excuse to do so. (I only took off my shirt for this photo, I’m not completely neglecting my scars or healing).
someone rlly tweeted “these so-called feminists are protesting against what could be the first female president in france” sorry feminism isnt about racist white women getting into power bc they’re women but you tried it?
in my preschool class we’re holding “class president of the day” elections this week. we already elected our first female president on monday, even though one of the boy’s campaign promises was to “bring jewels” to the classroom.
Lights go out, the crowd goes silent. A huge unicorn appears onstage. The gays flock on the field wearing nothing but relics from the “Artpop” era.
Suddenly, a voice echoes throughout the stadium:
“It doesn’t matter if you love him, or capital H I M”
A republican drops dead.
The unicorn explodes, releasing a cloud of glitter and grease. Tom Brady chokes on this eleganza. Gaga emerges wearing nothing but an American flag.
She sings the first verse and chorus of “Born this Way”, immediately destroying every nuclear weapon in the world.
She stops, looks straight at the camera: “My name is lady Gaga, but you can call me Joanne”.
An electric guitar bursts into flames while Gaga belts out “Perfect Illusion”, dismantling the white supremacy. The song suddenly fades out into “Manicure” for fifteen seconds.
A dance interlude storms onstage, while the “Venus” chants morphs into “Dance in the Dark”. An exorcism is performed live onstage.
The démon rises up, followed by “Bad Romance”. The Wesboro Baptist Church disappears into oblivion. GOP is drowned into hot cheetos, which allows time for Cher to become the first female US president.
The new United States of America is reborn to the tune of “Poker Face”, sung as a duet with Tony Bennett. Lady Gaga kicks a football and score a touchdown. Texas becomes officially gay™.
The performance ends, as Tony Bennett drops his flesh suit to reveal… BEYONCÉ!!! “Téléphone Part 2/Judas/Video Phone” mash up grants three wishes to every person who ever bought “Joanne” and watched “AHS: Hotel”. Laganja Estranja death drops on Joe Biden’s face.
Lady Gaga shoots fireworks from her Versace boobs while singing “The edge of Glory”, effectively ending homophobia everywhere in the world.
The stadium erupts in applause, as Lady Gaga’s voice fades away, singing the iconic bridge from “Applause”.
A jock in the audience turns to Barack Obama wearing a rainbow jacket, and whispers “She did that.” Obama answers “yes, she did.”
This weeks Illustrated Women in History was submitted by @karenharte for the next Illustrated Women in History zine, which will be available at the beginning of April. It will also be exhibited for the whole of April at Swindon Central Library, UK.
One of Ireland’s modern heroines is Mary Robinson, the first female President of Ireland.
Robinson advocated for the right to the legal availability of contraception, a removal of the requirement that married women resign from the civil service, and the right for women to sit on juries. She proved to be Ireland’s most popular President, breathing new life into the role and passing two important bills into law; legalisation of contraception and decriminalising homosexuality.
She has been has been credited with transforming the role with a presidency of inclusiveness, equality and peace building. Her work played a pivotal role in shaping modern Ireland.
Karen Harte is an illustrator and graphic designer from Dublin, Ireland.