felonization

INTERVIEW: @itswar99 - Get to know him!

I haven’t done an interview in forever…since before people got all uppity and narcissistic…lmao…but I was chillin with War and it just happened.  

If you don’t know War, he’s the pussyslayer dicklayer waging war on all the vaginas, lately. He’s a Felon with the Konvicted Ent group.  Usually, he’s so talkative, but as soon as I mic’d him, he got all shy and made me work for some convo.  Here goes:

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inookii: hi War! How are you?
Itswar99: im gud u
inookii: I’m great!
inookii: So let’s get right to it…you’re like the biggest pornstar right now, in my opinion…would you agree with that?
Itswar99: no i would just say im a up and coming…. star in the making
inookii: Oh. So who do you feel is better? Like, who do you look up to?
Itswar99: i dont feel anybody is the best and i look up to me, miss
inookii: ok ok, i get it.
inookii: So, I see you with all the baddest porn girls…always a hot scene…who’s your fav to fuck?
Itswar99: my fav to fuck… well i dont really have a fav. they all is gud.
inookii: LOL
inookii: Safe answer
Itswar99: lmao
inookii: Are you dating anyone right now or just doing your thing?
Itswar99: im not dating anybody, im just living life, partying and chilling
inookii: Do you date at all? Like, for your fans…if the right one should ever get to you, could a relationship happen?
Itswar99: no not at this point. im not trying to do relationships now. i just like doin me, u know?
inookii: Damn! Sorry, ladies. LOL
inookii: How do you like working with the ladies at Konvicted?
inookii: Who’s the most difficult to deal with…who’s most fun?
inookii: I know Serena babies you til she gets a mood swing, then she’s like KillBill…lol
Itswar99: i love working with the konvicted girls they beautiful woman
Itswar99: the most difficult to deal with is
Itswar99: serena
Itswar99: lmao
inookii: LOL
inookii: I knew it
inookii: What’s her worst habit that makes u wanna beat her lil fat butt?
Itswar99: well so far i havent seen anything that make me wanna beat her butt lmao
inookii: Oh. So what makes her the most difficult then?
Itswar99: she diffucult tho get a hold of. thats why lmao
inookii: lol the boss is busy, i guess
Itswar99: mhm yea
inookii: What about the guys? I love me some Lorenzo… do you like him?
Itswar99: yea mr coo italian u he is cool
inookii: hmm.
inookii: So would you say that Konvicted is the best group or are you gonna stay neutral on that answer, too? LOL
inookii: Cause like any minute I’m bout to give you some alcohol so you’ll talk to me normal, mf!
Itswar99: i will say we doin gud for our self to have the team that we have. everybody does dey job but im not gonna stay neutral on is we the best or not. we do our thing though
inookii: True.
inookii: Right now, Serena is recruiting and I see you’re one of the Directors of Recruiting… who from any other group would you steal and place in Konvicted? Give me 2 names.
Itswar99: i would steal tyler stacks. he does gud work. thats really all. havent seen nobody else i would steal
inookii: whaaaa?!?!
inookii: No ladies?
inookii: What about MollyVu?
inookii: or MzTeez?
inookii: Don’t mind me…I’m just throwing out names.
Itswar99: well you meant women, too? 
Itswar99: shit i’d steal…
Itswar99: mollyvu! id steal asivnnavu, barbiee, ilianaavu,  alanivu, its a lot id steal. those names dere doe… lmao
inookii: LOL yesssss! all sexy bitches…
inookii: What about the one I said Ima beat up?
inookii: Oops, I have to edit that out. lmao
Itswar99: lmao
Itswar99: zz
inookii: Anyway, so I heard you’re the gangbang God…do you really prefer gangbangs to 1on1s or ?
Itswar99: i would prefer 101
inookii: You prefer 1 on 1?
Itswar99: cause i like to tear the pussy up alone
Itswar99: yea i do
inookii: lol
Itswar99: i can fuck it the way i really want and how long i want
Itswar99: thats just what i prefer but i dont have problems with gangbangs
inookii: Well damn…and how long is that usually?
Itswar99: lmao no comment
inookii: lol
inookii: I’ll find out…lol…by asking around, of course. lol
inookii: So let’s talk about your fashion…a lot of your fans admire your swag…your style…who’s your fav creator?
Itswar99: my fav creator… i dont have one. its a lot of gud ones.
inookii: i see.
inookii: Staying with the fashion… I love your hair…. between whose legs did you sit and get those braids done? LOL
Itswar99: a girl ik did my hair for me lmao
inookii: lmfao who? name
Itswar99: she not in the company or anything. her name is layla doe
inookii: Lucky Layla
inookii: lol tell her watch her back because your fans are kinda nuts
inookii: Anyway, final question…what’s coming up for Konvicted or just ItsWar?
Itswar99: what do u mean was coming up?
inookii: Like new endeavors like maybe some movies, short vids…more fashion modeling???
Itswar99: oh all that stuff is coming soon.. to be continued
Itswar99: but i just wanna say i love being a part of the konvicted enterprise and im not going nowhere! my ass gonna be a konvicted felon legend
inookii: You’re an awesome fit….and the group is pretty lit, so, I hear you!
inookii: What should girls do if they wanna be in one of your shoots?
inookii: How do they reach you?
inookii: Give me all of your contact.
Itswar99: if they wanna be in a shoot with me dey should just hit me up and ask me to do one. i wont say no. im a cool laid back guy. :)
Itswar99: its warvu on instagram, itswar99 on tumblr and imvu, and kik is southtwo. :)
inookii: Nice. Thank you, Itswar. :) You made me work, but I had fun!
Itswar99: u are welcome. i did to
inookii: Oh wait…who’s your fav interviewer? lol
Itswar99: u because u the first @inookii lmao
inookii: LOL mf there’ll be none greater
inookii  *pulls your hair*
Itswar99: yea it will loll
inookii: lol no
Itswar99: lmao
inookii: i’ll fight u
Itswar99: sure
Itswar99: ima let u  :)

He’s so adorbz!

How come felons have their right to vote restricted and taken away from them, but people with mental health issues and people on the FBI no fly list can get guns. People that have been deemed unsafe and possibly a danger to others in American society still have the right to bare arms. The government would rather take away the right to vote from certain people which is the basis of a democracy than limited the 2nd amendment.

vaguepositivity

reblogged

your post:

redcheekdays replied to your post:persuasion…

Faith in Spikes place in season 6 is one of the best AU ideas I’ve ever heard. Do you have any more headcanons about it?

Faith is a convicted felon who cannot get a job working at the doublemeat palace. She has no sympathy for Buffy’s fast-food woes. Instead, Faith tends bar at Willy’s, who pays her under the table. She’s actually terrible at making drinks–she refuses to serve human blood, which affects the clientele, and she has to google what goes into a manhattan every single time–but she breaks up all the fights, and she keeps down on the Slayer-related repair costs, which is worth every penny. 

Buffy gets off work at eleven, stinking of meat and grease, a white sack full of meat and grease in her hands, dreading what Dawn will say, dreading Willow’s expression, Tara’s sympathy. 

She gets home, and Faith is sprawled on the living room floor with Dawn, whose face is pink with laughter. Even Faith looks a little soft, a small smile on her face. 

“What are you doing here,” Buffy accuses, feeling like the monster who’s come home to wreck the happy families fantasy, the old fear that Faith is here to take her place roaring back into her belly. “I thought you were supposed to be serving demonspawn until two.” 

The smile fades from Faith’s face. “Yeah,” she says, straightening her shoulders. “Well, demonspawn thought it was a good idea to start up a gambling ring in my bar.” 

“Sounds like your kind of thing,” Buffy says, cold, ignoring the outrage on Dawn’s face. 

“It was totally not like that!” Dawn bursts out. “Faith busted a kitten-gambling ring, and totally iced a demon.” 

“I didn’t ice Clem,” Faith says, giving Dawn a quick grin. “Mighta put the fear of B into him, but he’ll live to play another day.” 

“And–look!” Dawn continues, and lifts up a very tiny cat from behind the couch, where Buffy couldn’t see. “Kitties!” 

Buffy blinks, some of the monstrousness seeping away with sheer surprise. “Bzuh?” she says, finally dropping her bags. “Kitties?” She comes around the couch to sit with them, and sure enough–there are about ten very small kittens gamboling around on the carpet. 

“Couldn’t let ‘em get eaten,” Faith says gruffly. “You don’t gotta take care of them, or anything–I’ll make a delivery to the pound in the morning. Just thought Dawnie might get a kick out of them.” 

A black kitten, very soft, stumbles into Buffy’s lap. She puts out a hand and pats it, tentative, and the kitten rumbles at her. She blinks hard against a sudden rush of tears. 

“No!” Dawn protests. “No, we have to keep them! Buffy, come on.” 

“I don’t know,” Buffy says eventually, when she can look up from the kitten. Faith is looking at her, too-knowing. “I guess we’ll have to wait and see.” 

COMPANIES THAT HIRE FELONS: NEEDING JOBS

AAmco
Ace Hardware
Alamo Rent A Car
Allied Van Lines
Allstate Insurance Company
America West Airlines
American Airlines
American Express
Apple INC
Arco
AT&T
Avis rent a car
Avon Products
Bally
Baskin-Robbins
Best Foods
Best Western
BFgoodrich
Black & Decker
Blue Cross & Blue Shield Assoc.
Bone Goods
Bridgestone
Brunswick Corp
Budget rent a car
Calvin klein INC
Campbell soup co.
Canon
Career Education Corp
Casio
Caterpillar INC
Cintas
DairyQueen
Dell
Dell Monte Foods
Delta Air Lines
Delta Faucet Co
Denny’s
Dollar Rent A Car
Domino’s Pizza
Dunkin Donuts
Dunlop Tires
Eddie Bauer
Exxon Mobil
Firestone Tire Co.
General Electric
Hanes
Hilton Hotels
Kmart
Kraft Foods
Marshalls Mcdonalds
Mobil Oil
Motorola
Old Republic International
Pepsi Co
Phillip Morris Co.
Sara LEE
Sears
Service Master
Dr pepper/seven up
Shell Oil Co.
Showtime networks
Sony
Southwest Air
Sprint Corp
Target
Toys R Us
TJ Maxx
Tribune Co.
U.S cellular
United Airlines
Verizon
Walgreens
Walmart
WM Wrigley Jr Co.
Zebra Technologies
Zenith Electronics
Xerox
SPREAD THE INFO FOR UNEMPLOYED FELONS.

Me: The logo you are using is my copyrighted design. You need to buy it or stop using it immediately.

Client: You want me to change my logo?

Me: You’re using a logo that I designed and you haven’t paid me for it, so yes. Yes I want you to change your logo.

Client: I found it on google images. No harm done, right? I was just looking for a logo.

Me: (ten days later) You’re still using my logo. What you’re doing is illegal. Stop.

Client: You’re not very friendly. Now I’m NEVER going to use your services.

Me: That’s fine. Just stop using my work. 

Client: I prefer not working with useless artists and b*tches.

Finally I apply for a DMCA Takedown and the logo is removed from this “client’s” website. I figure the case is closed, justice is served, etc, until two months later. 

Client: I was thinking of buying some photos from you… NOT.

An Oklahoma felon got a longer prison sentence because he loves basketball legend Larry Bird. When lawyers reached a 30-year sentence plea agreement for Eric James Torpy, he requested that it be extended to 33 years so he could match Bird’s jersey number. The judge was happy to accommodate him. Source

Client: We need a logo for our business and they said you can help us

Me: Yes, I can help you. Do you need me to design the logo for you?

Client: Actually we already have the logo - and we’re perfectly happy with it.

The client sends me a very blurry picture of a tiny design that I can barely make out.

Me: Okay, well what seems to be the problem?

Client: Well we had a designer make the logo for us. We love it and it looks great, but then they wanted us to pay $50.00 for it and we don’t want to pay for it.

Me:

Client: But then they wouldn’t give us the design in proper quality.

Me:

Client: So we want you to fix the quality for us so that we can use it on our site.

Me:

Years ago I interviewed for a position as an art director at a well-known L.A. agency. I took a seat in the waiting room to wait for my appointment. On the walls, framed nicely, were three ads that I had designed for the agency I worked for in New York. In fact, two of the ads were in my portfolio resting next to me. During the interview the creative director made no mention of the fact they had my work displayed as their own.

I didn’t get the job.